How many more THOUGHTCRIMES will this Kommissar commit on top of his amazingly simplistic attempts to slander Hillary? Now he has added to his crime of using the prohibited title "MTE" with the crime of referring to non-person K by name.

Can I have Vodkov's wallet when he gets "corrected"?

By the by, this People's Poll is not a very Progressive poll, I could only vote once.

I'm not coming in voluntarily! You will never catch me, you reactionaries! Long live Stalin!

He's fleeing! SEND IN THE NIXON CLONES!!!!

Kommissar Vodkov wrote:I'm not coming in voluntarily! You will never catch me, you reactionaries! Long live Stalin!

Now Criminal Kommissar, do not try to hide behind my great coat and try to sully my good name. I have seen your crimes, and it is most disappointing. After all, a good show trial usually involves just a bit of script writing to make it entertaining and beyond refute, but you have already put your crimes down in print with no prodding at all. The only "investigation" that is needed now is to what address do we send the bill for your bullet? Then again, our beloved Empress Hillary may yet find a use for you, though it is hard to imagine at this point. but perhaps if you were to start considering the Good of the Party™ over your own selfish needs, then perhaps you might at least continue to serve in some manner than as a necro voter. I understand there are some good opportunities open in the Gulag for one with your qualifications..

Hillary wrote:Are you a bigot too, Vodkov?
The Party™ provides a shovel and he keeps digging his own grave. He's down to 5'11", what says The Party™?

POTUSMTE H08

Vodkov, beware the black widow!

Hillary! For the people!

Comrades, comrades. While no one loves a show trial more than I do, and a purge is always fun, and no one loves one more than I do except our Many Titted Empress who always wears something washable for the blood splatters so while she's collected it for boudin noir, O+ preferred, goes best with German mustard, still I must question the effectiveness of all this infighting.

If we purge Vodkov, we will lose a good HO. And he's come so far these days. All you have to do is just look at him and make your lips just <i>look</i> like you're going to say a V and he shouts out, "Vast Right-Wing Conspiracy" and falls on the floor, foaming at the mouth, shaking in a grand mal seizure, his eyes rolled up in his head.

I mean, this boy has <i>Olberman</i> potential. I don't think that Pavlov could have done better with all the dogs in the San Francisco animal shelter with a television for each dog.

And don't we have some down time coming? Pinkie spends her time looking at websites with men's thongs, which might be interesting, <i>if they're occupied</i>. But isn't rather, er, perverted, dear Commissarka? The best party members are obvious pricks. That's like JFK putting a hat on all that hair.

Well clearly Criminal Kommissar has gone crazy. You have no doubt seen his crimes above, He may start shouting VRWC at the drop of a beet, but if you notice above, he even went so far as to suggest Hillary will be purged! No, he clearly is in need of some "tough love" and as Hillary said, she just wanted to know if Sunday morning was convenient.

Perhaps he can shave her thighs before the next photo-op.

Is there time? Such a vastness would require a long time to clear. And we have no idea whether the first shaven parts will still be smooth by the time he finishes.

Commissar Theocritus wrote:Perhaps he can shave her thighs before the next photo-op.

This is one case I wouldn't get too close to Commissar. Besides, as we know, what doesn't kill us only makes us stronger. I am confident that should this Criminal Kommissar survive, he will be much, much stronger once Hillary is done with him. Actually, we would be doing him a disservice by not allowing him to see the full extent of his crimes against the state.

Yes, Pupovich, I understand. But still, if we are to retain our reputation for benevolent firmness, the iron fist in the velvet glove, and just plain old mean, what could be more punitive than the commissar with his head between our Many Titted Empresses thighs with pruning shears? And a pry-bar to loosen the scabs.

Commissar Theocritus wrote:Pinkie spends her time looking at websites with men's thongs, which might be interesting, <i>if they're occupied</i>. But isn't rather, er, perverted, dear Commissarka? The best party members are obvious pricks. That's like JFK putting a hat on all that hair.

My dear Theocritus, do give me some credit. Would I waste time at such a site if the thongs WEREN'T occupied?

https://www.nuwear.com/thongs/

I'm not the fem equivalent of those losers I always see lurking around the ladies' lingerie departments. Honestly, why don't they just stay at home with the Sears catalog and let me shop in peace?

And as for the "Best Party Members", I'm not at all averse to seeing <s>Michael Moore</s> George Clooney in a thong. Bring 'im on!

Commissar Theocritus wrote:Yes, Pupovich, I understand. But still, if we are to retain our reputation for benevolent firmness, the iron fist in the velvet glove, and just plain old mean, what could be more punitive than the commissar with his head between our Many Titted Empresses thighs with pruning shears? And a pry-bar to loosen the scabs.

Hmmm I was hoping that (in the light of my long service to the People) I would be granted an honorable purging. Maybe a hollow point in the back of the head or a firing squad. I certainly wasn't expecting this. I'm afraid I will have to be tried in absentia. There's no way I'm coming anywhere near the MTE's thighs or her nether regions in general. Besides, I'm not a veterinarian so I don't think I have the skills necessary for grooming her Highness.

Commissar Pupovich wrote:Well clearly Criminal Kommissar has gone crazy. You have no doubt seen his crimes above, He may start shouting VRWC at the drop of a beet, but if you notice above, he even went so far as to suggest Hillary will be purged! No, he clearly is in need of some "tough love" and as Hillary said, she just wanted to know if Sunday morning was convenient.

Sunday morning I will have to join the trail via satellite uplink from the RV.

And for punishment, let us think about having the Criminal Kommissar shaving both Her Excellncy's nether regions and Comrade Hanoi Jane's.

Comrade Jane could also take personal charge of his reduKation. Ooooo..... thinking about that gives me goose bumps!

--
Blokhayev

Commissarka Pinkie, I take my hat off to you. Indeed those thongs are filled. And from what I can tell, there is no fakery there either. But, and here this old socialist breathes a heavy sigh, there's so often a reason that they're called dumbbells. I mean, it's so hard to get past the protein powder and the growth hormone. And I do hate to tell you this, but a lot of them might not actually be interested in a fine Commissarka, and might actually be doing some hanky-panky in the changing rooms. After all, you gotta wonder about a man with that much vanity. That usually happens when someone is the subject of desire, and not just the object.

But this leads to an interesting point. Clooney, although definitely one of us, a bit on the moonbat side, but one of us, has the disabling quality of being not utterly stupid. Not a mental giant, but not utterly stupid. It's a trade-off, you know, that I've found. The stupid want to prove to you that they are intelligent and work their mouths proving that they are not. The medium-intelligent want to prove they're serious and then we get endless gas about the notional bully state du jour--last decade Nuclear Winter, this decade Global Warming, yadadada. And the smart generally just want to screw. But the smart have spent so much time improving their minds that, well, lights off, folks.

Anyone thinking what I'm thinking? Lobotomies all round?

Vodkov, do not worry. Your long service to the party has worked in your favor. As punishment you will only be required to attend five Streisand concerts and three Cher ones. And of course trim the hooves of Mr. Reno. All four of them.

Commissar Theocritus wrote:Yes, Pupovich, I understand. But still, if we are to retain our reputation for benevolent firmness, the iron fist in the velvet glove, and just plain old mean, what could be more punitive than the commissar with his head between our Many Titted Empresses thighs with pruning shears? And a pry-bar to loosen the scabs.

Well I believe The People™ (that would be us of course) have spoken, and it seems The Peoples Consensus™ is that the Trial should begin Sunday as Hillary hath so ordained. Of course, Hillary can show benevolence based on his former service and spare the Criminal Kommissar the harshest of penalties should she desire. However, given his most recent defiance and imagined attempt to avoid his fate, I doubt benevolence is what Hillary will dispense.

Like she's going to change for Vodkov? Once I begged her, with tear in my eyes, not to ride Bruno around with her spurs but would she listen? No. I even offered her a cage of small furry things to bite the heads off of, but would she stop? No. Poor Bruno looks like he's been to one of those very strange San Francisco parlors which scars you on purpose. Now I am the first to admit that Bruno's a little bit strange, well, a <i>lot</i> strange, but deliberate scars? No. His sides are so raked by her spurs that they look like shark gills.

Be careful the small furry things fight back

The sniper kitties are everywhere!

It will be for his own good as we all know. But perhaps the Hillary will take his previous loyal service into account.... Aaaaargth! Can't believe even I could type that nonsense!

Our Many Titted Empress never forgives failure but always has an eye toward her eventual ascendancy to the throne of ultimate power and there are only two methods of survival: under the radar screen or being of service.

C'est tout.

Perhaps Hillary will be merciful to the Criminal Kommissar for he is clearly insane at the moment.... It may be his best defense.

I thought insanity was something only the party could confer......

Good point Comrade Red Star. Sp that only leaves him as a Criminal Kommissar!

Well, I guess I can volunteer to be Accused Vodkov's legal counsel. I mean, the Party has a pretty strong case against him and I will do my absolute best to give him good legal representation.

Enemy of the People Vodkov: Make sure you wear something proper for the show trial like a potato sack or something to denote your idiocy. We need to win the show-jury over by showing them how pathetic and utterly hopeless you are so be sure to wear the potato sack and try to contract an STD like the crabs. Yes, crabs sound good... the show-jury always sympathizes with idiots that have the crabs.

Chairmen - I trust you have already prepared and rehearsed the improvisational channeling of Vodkov's spirit before the jury - if only to show John Edwards what an amateur he is next to Punchenko.

You can do an interpretive dance on behalf of his defense!

The chairman can channel the jury's wallets out of their pockets and hold them for ransom until a not-guilty verdict is returned. But there are two problems. Jury? What jury? I thought we had three apparatchicki judges.

Also if Meow offered to defend me but could only get me off by turning loose of money in his sweaty palms, I'd write my will.

Chairman, I just hope you are for a strenuous Show Trial/Fund Raiser after that horrible Kennedy cop day you had recently.

Along with a new AKSU I bought yesterday, I'm planning on bringing popcorn and a 2 liter bottle of Diet Coke to the show trial.

What time does the does the show/trial start?

--

Zampolit Blokhayev - don't forget it's also a fundraiser, so popcorn and a 2 liter bottle of Diet Coke alone won't cut it. You get what you pay for (YGWYPF). Uhm, that last part (YGWYPF) is for the Party Members' eyes only. We shouldn't be undermining the blissful illusion among the proles that you can get stuff without having to pay for it in some way or another.

Comrade Red Square wrote:I trust you have already prepared and rehearsed the improvisational channeling of Vodkov's spirit before the jury - if only to show John Edwards what an amateur he is next to Punchenko.

Yes, I will also call forth a litany of witnesses which will consist of palm readers, tarot card broads and David Copperfield who has promised me his help in "spiriting" away the wallets of everyone present in the courtroom.

Commissar Theocritus wrote:But there are two problems. Jury? What jury? I thought we had three apparatchicki judges.

It's a show-jury, Theocritus. In other words, the show-jury is told by the three apparatchiki judges what the verdict is going to be and whether or not we should just go ahead and shoot the S-O-B. Its all standard operating procedure, you know, the usual dramatic pageantry that we use to make everyone think the system isn't rigged.

Commissar Pupovich wrote:Chairman, I just hope you are for a strenuous Show Trial/Fund Raiser after that horrible Kennedy cop day you had recently.

I'll be fine, Commissar Pupovich. Nothing makes me feel more alive than to see otherwise innocent Comrades confess his/her/it's fabricated crimes against the People™, the Party and the Children™. However, I would ask you to give Kommissar Vodkov a full mental evaluation so that we can skip all the formalities of planting evidence in his Dacha and instead lock him up for "mental instability". Anyone who thinks the free-market system works is obviously mentally unstable and MUST be locked up for the Greater Good™. Clearly Kommissar Vodkov is a threat to himself, the Common Good™ and the Children™ and we must throw him in some damp cell and drug him up… err… medicate him, yes, medicate him for the show-trial (be sure to use something that will keep him fairly sedated so use the higher milligram drugs we have in stock. I want him drooling during the proceedings! DROOLING!).

Red Square wrote:Zampolit Blokhayev - don't forget it's also a fundraiser, so popcorn and a 2 liter bottle of Diet Coke alone won't cut it. You get what you pay for (YGWYPF). Uhm, that last part (YGWYPF) is for the Party Members' eyes only. We shouldn't be undermining the blissful illusion among the proles that you can get stuff without having to pay for it in some way or another.

Now that I have my new AKSU and 9A-91 I'm sure I could enlist some "donations" from a local movie theater and a Coca-Cola truck that should happen by.

--
Blokhayev

I'm thinking that we could get some money out of Bill Gates. He might have learned his lesson when Our Many Titted Empress's Justice decided that he had not been sufficiently supportive of our aims and investigated him. I know, I know, he's bought some of the best lawyers but then let's never forget that most lawyers are congenitally on our side for their love of mischief drew them to law in the first place.

Chairman M. S. Punchenko wrote:[However, I would ask you to give Kommissar Vodkov a full mental evaluation so that we can skip all the formalities of planting evidence in his Dacha and instead lock him up for "mental instability". Anyone who thinks the free-market system works is obviously mentally unstable and MUST be locked up for the Greater Good™. Clearly Kommissar Vodkov is a threat to himself, the Common Good™ and the Children™ and we must throw him in some damp cell and drug him up… err… medicate him, yes, medicate him for the show-trial (be sure to use something that will keep him fairly sedated so use the higher milligram drugs we have in stock. I want him drooling during the proceedings! DROOLING!).

Your wish is my marching orders Chairman, See the following evaluation.

Ah, Criminally Insane Kommissar Vodkov, as you may know, I am Commissar of Mental Health and for our purposes today you may refer to me as Dr. Pupovich. It is my honor and privilege to have been directed by the Chairman to examine you and determine your state of mind at the time you committed Thought Crime™. You have had your rights explained to you correct?

Correct Criminally Insane Kommissar Vodkov??

Criminally Insane Kommissar Vodkov: Mmmumph mummmph

Oh, excuse me, let me remove your gag, Is that better?

Criminally Insane Kommissar Vodkov: I am innocent, this is a set up! My name is Kommissar Vodkov and I will see to it that you, the Chairman, the other conspirators, and this Hillary you all have turned into a cult of personality are taken out and shot! I will...

*Dr. Pupovich scribbles down "Criminal Kommissar is clearly delusional and has lost all contact with the Current Truth™ and is in extreme agitated state. Pupovich signals to attendant to give Kommissar Vodkov injection of 5 mg. Versed.

...and furthermore I... furthermore....I will....will...

That is much better Criminally Insane Kommissar Vodkov. I feel like we are making headway and I shall be less formal will just call you Nutjob Vodkov from here on. I will start with some simple questions to determine if you are truly criminally insane or faking insanity in order to evade the People's Justice™ that you so clearly deserve.

First a little question... How many wallets am I holding in my hand?

Nutjob Vodkov:

Pay attention Nutjob Vodkov! Don't fall asleep on me!
*Dr. Pupovich signals to aide to taser the rapidly fading Vodkov*

Nutjob Vokov: Arrrrrrrgggggh! What...where...

How many wallets am I holding in my hand Vodkov?

Nutjob Vodkov: Four! Four damn your black hearted money grubbing trai....
*Dr. Pupovich signals to aide to taser Nutjob Vodkov* Arrrrrrrrrrgggggggh Grrrrrrrrrrrrrrooooooooaaaaannnnn

And Nutjob Vodkov... If I say there are only 3 wallets, how many would you say I am holding?

Nutjob Vodkov: Four! Four!

Now now Vodkov...you are getting too excited...
*Dr. Pupovich scribbles down "Criminal Kommissar is suffering from oppositional thinking and becoming increasingly agitated.

Now I have a simple puzzle for you to try and solve. Try and stack this banned "Holy" Bible on top of the banned Ann Coulter book we found in your dacha.

Did you hear me clearly Nutjob Vodkov?
*Aide whispers into Dr. Pupovich's ear*
Oh, yes! But just loosen his right arm.
*Aide begins to undo one arm of Vodkov's straight jacket.*

Nutjob Vodkov: I will rip your throat out you...
*Nutjob Vodkov lunges toward Dr. Pupovich with murderous intent in his eyes.*

Zzzzzzzzzaaaaaaaaap! Zaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaap!
*Cries of rage and pain fill the bunker as aide tasers Nutjob Vodkov as Dr. Pupovich scribbles down "Criminal Kommissar is suffering from dangerous pschosis and becoming extremely violent again despite previous maximum recommended dosages. Patient Nutjob Vodkov will now be administered yet another 5 mg. Versed and 10 Pup's Powdered Psilocybin Mushrooms™*

Is that better? Yes, you are starting to relax now, Now let us do a little word association Nutjob Vodkov. Just say the first thing that enters your twisted mind when I say....

Hillary?

Nutjob Vodkov: Power grubbing whore...

Chairman Punchenko?

Nutjob Vodkov: Money grub... gubbing whore...mone....

The Party?

Nutjob Vodkov: the colors... can't... Hidlo... Hildo... Bush flower babe...
*Nutjob Vodkov falls over in chair in a rapidly relaxing state of semi-consciousness...drooling from mouth.

My work is done here Chairman. Clearly we have a seriously disturbed and violent criminal Kommissar to be tried.

He is suffering from delusional, borderline psychotic and oppositional thinking, associated with a poor grasp of the Current Truth™. I would recommend that he be maintained on alternating doses of 3mg Versed with a bottle of potato vodka for the duration of the trial. This should provide the needed drooling and sedation needed. In addition, Versed also causes retrograde amnesia, so not only will it act as a sedative agent, he will not remember the trial nor of course any witnesses against him. Of course he will no doubt benefit from rehabilitation therapy at the Karl Marx Treatment Center, provided of course the Party takes into account his previous service to the Party and allows him to continue being a burden on the earth as a carbon dioxide producer. He would also no doubt benefit from long term regimen of thorazine to control his dangerous psychosis,

In conclusion, my professional and totally unbiased diagnosis of Criminally Insane Kommissar Vodkov is as follows....
<center><img src="https://members.cox.net/pupsdoghouse/nu ... center><br>

Hmmm... very interesting, Dr. Pupovich. Well, I guess we will find out after the Clinton Campaign Sponsored Show Trial and Fundraiser® whether or not People's Enemy Vodkov should receive a lobotomy. I mean, we have to ask ourselves one question here: What would Joe Kennedy do?

I hope my evaluation will help you with your defense, or prosecution of People's Enemy Vodkov. These Show Trials of Party Members are always times of stress for all involved... will you get a good seat, how much vodka will be needed, barbecue or catered food etc. But it is necessary damn Bush's hide! Anyway, if there is anything more you need for your case feel free to call on me.

Kommissar Vodkov is very grateful for his defense. This is exactly what being a Party member means: The camaraderie, the solidarity! Commissar Pupovich, I am forever in your debt!

Well, I am hoping I can stop referring to you as the Criminally Insane Kommissar soon. As someone who has been on trial before, I know how nerve wracking it can be, But I am grateful to the Party for keeping me on my toes, for examining every nook and cranny of my non-existent soul to weed out any hint of Thought Crime. Of course, I was innocent as puppies do these things. But the best bet if you can not prove your innocence, and lets face it Criminal Kommissar, there is a ton of evidence to be presented, not to mention any that is made up, the best bet may be to plead this insanity, admit error, confess, and not just wait for judgment, but volunteer for re-edukation.

Vodkov, Pupovich knows whereof he speaks. When he first was admitted to the Inner Sanctum, the regular party members held an informal meet-and-greet, which was of course a kangaroo court and an exploratory purge. And, let's face it--we were bored and Pupovich was to hand. It's not easy being one of the Party Elect, you know, all that responsibility, all that money to take, those meaningless orders to give, all that terror. You know sometimes I get terrified of not being able to think of more terror to people people in their place.

Don't worry. You're on the downhill slope.

...I wonder why I wasn't purged. Don't they like me? I wonder. Am I not red enough and are they planning something that I don't know about?...

Commissar Theocritus wrote:.I wonder why I wasn't purged. Don't they like me? I wonder. Am I not red enough and are they planning something that I don't know about?...

After the way Our Empress just responded to your theory, your time may be coming Commissar. Of course I did all I could do to abate her fury,

Aw, when you get to know her, Hill is all warm and cuddly. As long as you spit-shine her hooves.

Is it true that one can find the rotting remains of former Commissars that displeased her in the crevices of her hooves?

SMO! Hope this does mean good news for you, as you said, the more they can pin down the problem, the better they can help, provided this is a good socialized physician of course not motivated by filthy money. I am happy to say my PET scan came back negative Wednesday, which almost surprised me. But now I still have to find out why my neck has swollen more and gotten harder to turn and swallow,

Any hoo, you remain in our prayers and we will be looking out for massively opiated dolphins to come back in force.