The famous Beltway bordello that was shut down after 13 years of impeccable service last October is now fighting back with a vengeance. Madam Deborah Jeane Palfrey and her lawyer claim their business was in no way different from the generally accepted liberal practices of simulating love and compassion for the downtrodden with the purpose of amassing large fortunes and obtaining power. "Shutting down a bordello in Washington, D.C. equates to the criminalization of the liberal lifestyle and politics of progressivism," says Madam's civil lawyer, stating that sex workers are being unfairly singled out from the general Beltway population of politicians, lobbyists, media celebrities, news editors, journalists, and special interest groups.
"The leader, in both cases, is called Madam," continued Madam Palfrey. "It is no coincidence that Bush referred to Nancy Pelosi as Madam Speaker. She has a big house to maintain, with 435 'public servants' to keep on a leash. And just like my girls, I'm sure, every one of them is motivated purely by compassion towards the downtrodden, selflessly aiming to provide services to the community while emulating best European standards. I just hope that when her bitches become too much of a pain in the ass, Madam Speaker will have the wits to close the shop and move on to start a different life, before she gets herself indicted on federal racketeering charges like yours truly."
has a big house
"public servants" to keep on
For Madam Palfrey, moving on to a different life is a challenge. She has to pay for her criminal defense, but the government has seized her bank accounts and about $1.5 million in real estate. To help pay her legal bills she is now threatening to sell a list of famous political whores, which her lawyer said investigators let slip through their fingers. The list includes up to 10,000 politicians, lobbyists, publishers, educators, union leaders, Hollywood celebrities, and other widely known figures who may or may not have been her clients, but who have gotten where they are today by doing exactly what her female escorts are being accused of. But while the girls are being investigated, the powerful people on the list remain free, get to keep their huge estates, and even run for the presidency on the Democrat ticket.
To give potential bidders a taste of what's in the package, Palfrey posted excerpts of records on her Web site, exposing such hi-end players as male prostitute John Edwards, international gigolo John Kerry, William "Cold Cash"Jefferson, Hillary "War Chest" Clinton, Arthur "Fit to Print" Sulzberger, and other political bigwigs who have been able to successfully fake love for the disadvantaged in exchange for considerable payments in cash and favors.
"Labels like 'hooker' and 'prostitute' don't do justice to the complexity of the issues and individuals involved," says Madam Palfrey. "If being a prostitute means to display caring for those who picked you from the roster of other candidates and tend to all their needs, to follow their slightest whims and desires, to act as if you like them while fighting the gag reflex, to create the illusion of bliss and harmony leading to a mutual climax and hoping that the next time they will pick you again - while at he same time both parties pretend that their relationship is based on affection and not large amounts of cash - then yes, call us prostitutes."
|In related news:|
Sowing the Seeds through Science and Engineering:
The science and engineering community is already feeling unforeseen fallout from the Beltway bordello scandal due to increasing fears that Bill H.R. 363, otherwise known as Sowing the Seeds through Science and Engineering Research Act, may not pass House vote because of its ambiguous title, as well as potential links to pleasure-for-money technologies.
PHOTO: Already, research funding for this U.S. graduate student into his highly promising dual military/and pleasure-for-money application is threatened.
Oh... and its Fitzgerald by the way, Miss Nancy. He the Special Party pitbull... Remember?
LupéOh... and its Fitzgerald by the way, Miss Nancy. He the Special Party pitbull... Remember?
WHAT!?! WHAAATTT!!?!? <whips> I DON'T GIVE A FLYING RATS ASS WHICH MAN IT IS THROWING REPUB PUKES INTO PRISON!!! JUST GET ME A DAMN PHONE AND DIAL THE S.O.B! Gawd dammit! GAWD DAMMIT! ARRRGGHHH!! <throws> GET ME FITZFLUNK ON THE PHONE... NOOOOOWWWW! AHHHHH!!!!
NancyOh... my... STALIN! Yes Nancy? What can I do for you?
I would have answered sooner. After all, I have always been known as a proud servant of "the people", but we've been having so much fun lately, down here in the nether regions, with our new Saddam and Zarkawi toys, seeing what will fit into their nether regions . . . well, you have to understand that we rarely get this quality entertainment.
Um, what were we talking about?
OK, WE'VE GOT TO DECIDE!
WHAT'S IT GOING TO BE FOR THIS....THIS.....THIS WHORE! (....wait a minute is she one of mine? Did she pay her "dues"?)
A) Ft. Marcy
B) Plane Crash ala Ron Brown
c) Certified Dr. Malik accidental be-heading on the railroad tracks.
D) Car Crash
E) The "Other" option.....
I live in the region of the People's Socialist Republic of the District of Columbine.
I'll go over to her house and load her up on Milk of Magnesia. If that does not work, well ... she can SAY HELLO TO MY LEETLE FRIEEND!!!
Zampolit B. S. Blokhayev
But the first option, of course, is to use this multi-purpose tool of the proletariat upside the head:
As Meatloaf once sang "Two Out of Three Ain't Bad" ...you are so close...
It does involve water and a certain cetacean.
She has been trained since 1973 for circumstances just like this.
All we need to do is to get Madam Deborah Jeane Palfrey to go for a little cruise on the Potomac and the cetacean will complete the work.
Could Madam Speaker make the arrangements?....let say maybe a "A Spring Diversity Global Warming Fundraising Cruise" and invite Obama, John Edwards, Al Gore,...etc..Madam Deborah Jeane Palfrey would be hired as the hostess, her resume is replete with many references in the "hospitality industry". Of course Madam Speaker and I will have an important UN conference or what not to attend and we'll send our
Craig Livingstone will be head of operations. He'll first obtain the Madam's list for our safekeeping. Sandy "Scissorhands" Berger will be backup in case Livingstone is co-opted, discovered, or fails in his mission. Both have previous successful experience in this line of work.
Once this mission is accomplished, the "Cruise" will set sail and the cetacean will finalize the plan.
Option "E": Code name "Schwester".
Here's Craig, Donna, ME, and Rosie in happier times!
If that somehow doesn't work we could always just blow up her house and blame it on Bushitler because he is one of those on her list of customers and he killed her to keep her quiet. The remainder of the list was unfortunately destroyed in the blast.
WAR IS PEACE
FREEDOM IS SLAVERY
IGNORANCE IS STRENGTH
(LUPE! Get your ass in here and read me *my* very important and official schedule! NOW! MOVE IT MOVE IT MOVE IT! You stupid whore, you're not going to earn that two minutes of Telemundo dragging your feet like some lame cripple! What the hell are you, little Timmy!? Move it woman... pick up those scabbed feet and get over here!)
8:00 - Botox Injection with Dr. Gerfencluckenhiemer
9:00 - Face lift with Dr. Gerfencluckenhiemer
10:00 - Tummy tuck with Dr. Gerfencluckenhiemer
11:00 - Brunch with Dr. Gerfencluckenhiemer
12:00 - Colon cleaning with Dr. Gerfencluckenhiemer
12:30 - Nap till 3:00
3:00 - whipping for Lupé ( maybe you could cancel this, Miss Nancy. To make room for Miss Hillary?)
4:00 - Congressional work
4:04 - Cocktails with Teddy
4:05 - Legislative Report from Lord Fwank
4:06 - Nap until 8
8:00 - Dinner with corporate interest
9:00 - Family time
9:01 - *Nancy Time*
10:00 - *Nancy Time*
11:00 - *Nancy Time*
11:15 - Bedtime story
11:16 - Sleep
Lupe3:00 - whipping for Lupé ( maybe you could cancel this, Miss Nancy. To make room for Miss Hillary?)
Don't be ridiculous, Lupe - I know how much you look forward to your daily beating. Hmmm... looks like I'm booked... Hmmm, maybe I could sacrifice some personal time to make room for Operation "Schwester". OK, Lupe; I want you to cancel Family time, Congressional work and my Legislative report from Bonnie. Yes, that should give me enough time to make a few phone calls to the appropriate channels of influence. I also want you to re-schedule my 12:30 nap and make room for a 12:40 U.N meeting. My nap will just have to start at 1:00... book me a room at the Waldorf and make sure tax-dollars cover the bill. Oh, and make sure you pack my overnight bag and be sure to stuff an extra pair of dentures... the pearly white ones, I MUST look good for the cameras... I MUST!
Zampolit B. S. Blokhayev
Zampolit BlokhayevMadam Speaker, shall I "deal" with this Whore to the Imperialist Swine?
Zampolit B. S. Blokhayev
No... Hillary and I shall deal with this personally. But please make yourself useful and fetch me a V8.
Fetch Comrade Speaker Nancy a V8 and moved that Burrito stuffed lard ass mi muchacha!!! Or Mees Nancy can deal with you!!!!
This will be easier than I thought with Craig in charge of the operation. That's where Laika found him for me when he was just a poor bar bouncer for Graffitti, a rock night club in the 'Burgh.
He was so kind to identify Vince for me! Craig is a genius!
I'm sure he has a link to Palfrey. Has Craig reported in yet?
But what am I supposed to do? Ever since that hysterical panic about global warming started by Algore was taken seriously by the big companies who have quit producing all the chemicals that I want at prices I want to pay, and I can't trust my goon squads to liberate as much as I could like, I can't get the right fertilizer for the soil. So I've been composting the kulaks who have died from infection when I cut off their feet--those drugs from Juarez are so unreliable, and anyway the good pharmacists have fled across the Rio Grande where Comrade Nancy wants to give them social security and then what will I do?
And just think, Comrades, to return to the news of the brothel! It almost makes me believe in that bourgeous god. Do you suppose I could contract with it for the fetuses of the abortions? If I could have those, and all the stuff coming out of Comrade Nancy's mouth, I could continue to grow my produce and sell it to George Soros and mark it organic.
I cannot, in Socialist Truth, call it non-toxic but he's more toxic than salmonella and botulism.
Judge Kessler fixed things really quick. The gag order is in place, not a peep from the media, and behold....NO LIST OF CLIENTS!
I'm checking it against Craigslist....no, not the website...the 900 files dummy.
If Obama is on either/or, one or the other, something's going to get leaked.
Born 1938 in New York, NY
Federal Judicial Service:
Judge, U. S. District Court for the District of Columbia
Nominated by William J. Clinton on March 22, 1994, to a seat vacated by Michael J. Boudin; Confirmed by the Senate on June 15, 1994, and received commission on June 16, 1994. Assumed senior status on January 22, 2007.
Cornell University, B.A., 1959
Harvard Law School, LL.B., 1962
Appellate attorney, National Labor Relations Board, 1962-1964
Legislative assistant, U.S. Sen. Harrison A. Williams, 1964-1966
(Read about her former boss Sen. Williams, unlike Murtha, he did get busted for Abscam: http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Harrison_A._Williams)
Legislative assistant, U.S. Rep. Jonathan Bingham, 1966-1968
(Read about her other boss, Rep. Bingham, one of the board members of People for The American Way: http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Jonathan_Brewster_Bingham)
Special assistant, Director of Office of Staff Relations, New York City Board of Education, 1968-1969
Private practice, Washington, DC, 1969-1977
Associate judge, Superior Court of the District of Columbia, 1977-1994
Race or Ethnicity: White
Who needs Craig when we got Gladys?
BTW, has anybody seen Craig? No? Gee, there must be a reason for that. I can't figure out why......
HillaryHere we are in extreme political danger and where is the Bvt. Field Marshall?
I was deep undercover with Comrade Smersh reconitoring the Obama phenomenon, and unable to emerge to report until now. There are many weaknesses to report; you'll have a dossier soon. Think Fort Marcy Park.
It's probably some automatic news aggregation script that did it blindly - but that makes it even funnier. We could only wish that other Congress, Senate, and related sources put a prominent link to our Beltway Bordello article. The same goes for the sites educating the public about the workings of the federal government.
This humble space dog begs a favor:
Can you decipher this?
I was supposed to pick up a signal from Craig regarding "Madam from The Mon".
Is this it?
I was supposed to get a confirmation that the kill ratio must be 3:1 in favor of The Party.
I can't find it anywhere, but maybe you can help?
H08 official Lapdog of the Revolution,
-- Nuclear Nancy
I just arrived in D.C. and my favorite whorehouse is closed! Then I discover that useful idiot Eliot Spitzer is to blame. What's up with that?
Why is everybody blaming him for engaging in
No comrades, he was trapped by the VRWC!
We have a new Enemy of the People™: