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Cash for Clunkers: Obamacare Edition

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Yes comrade it's a travesty. I was HOPE-ing more Comrades would vote for CHANGE NOW!!! Yet all we have is astroturf to show for our efforts, because not enough sheep people are falling in line.

We need more beer summits, I agree, I got it! er, I mean, collectively we have surmised...

We should have National Beer Summit Day for Healthcare™. Maybe that would work as good as the rock bands we got to play before Obama spoke on the campaign trail last year.

Drink up! A round of vodka for everyone!

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Hurry! Drink up before the Commissar returns!

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This fishy rumor was sent to us in an email, but it's also making rounds on the Internet:

Anonymous joker wrote:The American Medical Association has weighed in on the new Obama health care proposals.

The Allergists voted to scratch it, but the Dermatologists advised not to make any rash moves. The Gastroenterologists had sort of a gut feeling about it, but the Neurologists thought the Administration had a lot of nerve.

The Obstetricians felt they were all laboring under a misconception. Ophthalmologists considered the idea shortsighted. Pathologists yelled, "Over my dead body!" while the Pediatricians said, "Oh, Grow up!"

The Psychiatrists thought the whole idea was madness, while the Radiologists could see right through it. Surgeons decided to wash their hands of the whole thing. The Internists thought it was a bitter pill to swallow, and the Plastic Surgeons said, "This puts a whole new face on the matter...."

The Podiatrists thought it was a step forward, but the Urologists were pissed off at the whole idea. The Anesthesiologists thought the whole idea was a gas, and the Cardiologists didn't have the heart to say no.

In the end, the Proctologists won out, leaving the entire decision up to the assholes in Washington.

Should we report it to [email protected]?

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There is a shortage of proctologists in Texas; if they move to Washington they don't have to do a psychiatry residency.

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Those proctologists, do they have Peoples Certificates(TM) to practice wherever they like? I hear new rules are being applied in which proctology shall take a back seat to CheTex(TM) products.

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There is a special dispensation for proctology. It is commonly thought that TOTUS runs the show, but in truth His O'liness is run by Nansky Peloski's arm up his ass.


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Ivan Betinov wrote:
Remember, Tuesday is Soylent Green Day!

"Soylent Green is people."
"Soylent Green is OLD people."
Actually, the Old People go into Soylent Gray, not Soylent Green.

But what if the Old People™ use Grecian formula?

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In this green world, the only proper Soylent is Soylent Green. Not gray, not black, not white, not brown, not yellow, but green.

So hath decreed Al Gore, the High Priest of the First Church of Climatology and foot masseur to Gaia.

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Comrade Collectvists! Come one, come all, to the glorious world of Shiny Things! For even in the end The Great Motherland sucked viciously, like the evil KKKapitalist, on the black gold of The Motherland!

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Admire the wares of Socialist Serenity(TM).

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A bit of Interweb folklore:

TOP TEN INDICATORS THAT YOUR EMPLOYER HAS CHANGED TO OBAMACARE:

(10) Your annual breast exam is done at Hooters.

(9) Directions to your doctor's office include "Take a left when you enter
the trailer park."

(8) The tongue depressors taste faintly of Fudgesicles.

(7) The only proctologist in the plan is "Gus" from Roto-Rooter.

(6) The only item listed under Preventive Care Coverage is "an apple a
day.."

(5) Your primary care physician is wearing the pants you gave to Goodwill
last month.

(4) "The patient is responsible for 200% of out-of-network charges," is not
a typographical error.

(3) The only expense covered 100% is "embalming."

(2) Your Prozac comes in different colors with little M's on them.

AND THE NUMBER ONE SIGN YOU'VE JOINED OBAMACARE:

(1) You ask for Viagra and they give you a Popsicle stick and Duct Tape.

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Citizen Jack Deeney of Danbury, CT has sent us his version of Jonathan Swift's "Modest Proposal," which he wrote before he even saw our "Cash For Clunkers" advertisement. But once he saw it, he felt obliged to share. It's published on his blog here. Worth the read.

- A MODEST PROPOSAL -
CASH FOR CLUNKERS II

From: Citizen Jack Deeney

In which the proposer, mindful of the generosity of spirit and brilliance of enterprise demonstrated by our nation's Central Planning Committee, all the while adhering to the general concepts that people are the riches of the nation and that the wealth of a country derives from the poverty of the majority, does hereby offer:

a proposed combining of two governmental programs into one, preventing the aged in America from becoming a burden to their children or to their country and for making them beneficial to the Public.

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Jonathan Swift was an awful man. Doesn't he know that sarcasm is dangerous? Sarcasm can point out the idiocies of people and satire? Satirists ought to be shot. I personally am never sarcastic or ironic; I look at everything full on and take it seriously.

I have to. I adore Dear O'Leader and Nansky and our Many Titted Empress. If I were sarcastic I'd make, er, cracks about them.

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An appropriate honest-to-the-One story came in the mail today:

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The phone rings and the lady of the house answers.
"Hello?"
"Mrs. Sanders, please."
"Speaking."
"Mrs. Sanders, this is Dr. Jones at St. Agnes Laboratory. When your husband's doctor sent his biopsy to the lab last week, a biopsy from another Mr. Sanders arrived as well. We are now uncertain which one belongs to your husband. Frankly, either way the results are not too good."
"What do you mean?" Mrs. Sanders asks nervously.
"Well, one of the specimens tested positive for Alzheimer's and the other one tested positive for HIV. We can't tell which is which."
"That's dreadful! Can you do the test again?" questioned Mrs. Sanders.
"Normally we can, but the new health care system will only pay for these expensive tests just one time."
''Well, what am I supposed to do now? "
"The folks at Obama health care recommend that you drop your husband off somewhere in the middle of town. If he finds his way home, don't sleep with him."

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Stop these jokes Comrade Red Square! I think I'm going to loose a lung if they keep up.

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I DENOUNCE KONSERVATIVE KANADIANS!!!

I have some farmland in Alaska to sell you…

As someone who works as a doctor, the following is all too common.

From On The Fence Films





Now I am not arguing the US system is perfect, no system is. But theUS spends as much per capital on socialized medicine as we do! They have socialized medicine down there, Medicare and Medicaid. A single woman with 2 kids making under $30,000 a year is covered by Medicaid.
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I have seen the frustration of not being able to get on certain medicine in Canada because its “not covered yet” - but is covered for those in government or working for government, of course.<br>Then of course we have idiot socialists like Ehrenreichof the LA Times in the US railing as often as they can on the unfairness of the public medical system down there. How there are rooms filled with crap from the last patient, long waiting lists etc.
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Once you get past the emergency room, friends assuredus, the quality of care at County-USC is quite good. And it was, if youcould ignore the previous patient's bloody bandages left on the base ofyour gurney, or the towels stained with urine — some wet, some alreadydry — that covered the floor of the bathroom on the ward. The doctors,when you saw them, were attentive enough. But seeing a doctor was no easy task.
[/BLOCKQUOTE]
If idiots like that think the same thing doesn't happen up here, I have some great farmland in Alaska to sell you.
Time for a rethink.


SOURCE: https://www.clangmann.net/?cat=14


 
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