Ugh, Meryl Streep made me so weepy in her accurate portrayal of us, Dr. P. I must have went through ten boxes of People's Tissues™.

Still, to show both of you that I am a progressive unit. I shall transfer all my records to both of you right away.

Sister Massively Opiated -
Just rember that the sacrifice that you are making is for The Common Good.

Chairman M. S. Punchenko wrote:Ugh, Meryl Streep made me so weepy in her accurate portrayal of us, Dr. P. I must have went through ten boxes of People's Tissues™.

Which reminds me, Meow... before I go to sleep... I buffed your black patent pumps... they're just outside your door. Just please remember not to put them on until your toe polish dries... preferably not till morning...

Awwah, SMO - don't fret now, don't fret! Here, take 20% of the Oil Profits... I don't want you going to bed grumpy!

Chairman M. S. Punchenko wrote:Ahh yes, Dr. P - Commissar Roscoe was a miserable wretch indeed! Ugh, I was sooo relieved when he took that leap of faith out my 40th floor window. Some people have no taste... no taste at all! And let us not forget the time when he had us shuttled to a major Party function in a Ford Taurus! THE OUTRAGE! Ugh; I can only wish his demise was more sloppy.

Ohhhh, the dreaded Taurus incident! The thought of it is giving me a panic attack. Sacre bleu! <grabs framed, autographed photo of Meryl Streep> All better now.

BTW, who is our new airbrush guy? I need to have Roscoe "removed" from my Party albums.

Thanks Sweet Meow...

I'll tell Chicken Sushi to take good care of you while I sleep off this cold bug... I really was sure I was over it... <sniffle, snort.. >...

Nighty night.

Here, Dr. P - breath into your diamond-studded bag! Deep breaths... exhale... deep breaths... exhale.

That damn Roscoe. I will NEVER forget the time he embarrased all of us in front of Susan, Tim and Sean with his "bombs over Iran" joke... I will NEVER FORGET THAT! He even had the audacity to drive through the local McDonalds WITH US IN THE TAURUS! Remember that Dr. P? OUTRAGEOUS!

Hmm, I think Manny is the new air-brush guy. I'm not to sure though since we had a number of useful-idiots named "Manny" disappear in the night. Maybe his name is Paulie?

Chairman M. S. Punchenko wrote:That damn Roscoe. I will NEVER forget the time he embarrased all of us in front of Susan, Tim and Sean with his "bombs over Iran" joke... I will NEVER FORGET THAT! He even had the audacity to drive through the local McDonalds WITH US IN THE TAURUS! Remember that Dr. P? OUTRAGEOUS!

I seriously thought he was joking at first, but when he actually ordered the Big Mac combo, supersized no less, I was aghast and nearly soiled myself with rage.

I trust you'll be needing Manny's or Paulie's services as well.

Chairman, I seek your approval of this new badge. It is part of a 5 year plan in which I will be revising it for myself over each and every year.

RedtheProgressiveHedgehog wrote:Chairman, I seek your approval of this new badge. It is part of a 5 year plan in which I will be revising it for myself over each and every year.

I like it! Anything with the Hammer and Cycle.

RedtheProgressiveHedgehog wrote:Chairman, I seek your approval of this new badge. It is part of a 5 year plan in which I will be revising it for myself over each and every year.

Yeah... and can I be the Kommissar of Housekeeping?

Sister Massively Opiated wrote:

RedtheProgressiveHedgehog wrote:Chairman, I seek your approval of this new badge. It is part of a 5 year plan in which I will be revising it for myself over each and every year.

Yeah... and can I be the Kommissar of Housekeeping?

Sister Massively Opiated, I think that would be a wonderful idea, but you will have to run it by the Chairman. If there already is a Kommissar of Housekeeping, since you have been a very progressive worker maybe he will purge that Kommissar for you.

Halliburton! YOU EVIL CAPITALIST PIG! You are coming in here just to try and break up the people! We have stood togther for years and fought capistalism, and we wont break up now! Not when our revolution is so close!
<follows him into is office><whispers>Hey, if by some slim chance that the Republicans do win next election. I can replace all your expensive workers with humiod robots, they do not require pay, no healthcare, no unions, nothing but results (they can also carry you around on your chair for much longer than humans could). Can I be a Political boss?
<walks back out>
Comrades! We will continue to fight until the death for a workers paradise!

Sister Massively Opiated wrote:Yeah... and can I be the Kommissar of Housekeeping?

I like it. Perhaps you should update your inner comrade picture ("avatar"). Looking at the dolphin's head and imagining all you words being uttered through those small sharp teeth has been a disturbing experience. Just last night I had a nightmare about a fully armed dolphin soaking in Chairman's yellow bathtub and woke up screaming.

Red Square wrote:

Sister Massively Opiated wrote:Yeah... and can I be the Kommissar of Housekeeping?

I like it. Perhaps you should update your inner comrade picture ("avatar"). Looking at the dolphin's head and imagining all you words being uttered through those small sharp teeth has been a disturbing experience. Just last night I had a nightmare about a fully armed dolphin soaking in Chairman's yellow bathtub and woke up screaming.

For historical reference... this is the frightening sharp-toothed talking dolphin head of nightmares... you can see why it is so disturbing...


Certainly - I will take your suggestion as tacit approval, though Hedgehog seems to think it is Chairman's decision. I wonder what Moose and Squirrel think ("Hey Rocky! Wanna see me pull a Hedgehog outta my hat?").

I am sorry I have given you nightmares, though to be certain, that is part of the appeal of the pod... Greenpeaceniks have promulgated idea that pod is peaceful and fun-loving Disney-like water mammal, but the pod are warriors... and navy trained at that. We wish to strike fear into the hearts of those who would mock the Party and eat Cetaceans (particularly the Japanese and Norwegians). Our little zipper teeth are cute, as are our smiles, but they are also sharp, and we have them cleaned regularly (Oki is also having braces as his were a tad crooked and he was embarrassed to smile widely)... Just the other day, we were testing some new underwater camera equipment in bunker 7 and one of the boys snapped this one... I think it's rather flattering... but please... scream all you like.

On the other hand, if you want cute, I have a picture of a stuffed animal that my brother gave me for my birthday, though I would not want to tread on Margaret's toes here... his name is Fidel (no comments please... I did not name him)...
We have never been sure what he is supposed to be, but he seems slightly cat-like, so we have dubbed him a Nospurratu... I sometimes wonder if he would make a good avatar, though he might be confusing to some... perhaps closer to Halloween, to mock superstitious kulaks ...

I will think a little longer on the avatar change if you don't mind, but only because the pod is proud... and thank you for your approval.
SMO

Josef H. Stalin... everyone is running to me about all these questions and badges and positions and and and.... ugh, my head hurts now <smells ca$h> Ahh, better, yes, SMO, you may be the Commissar of Housekeeping ( the dolphin is creepy and the thought of my yellow bathtub is disturbing as well).

Progressive Rodent; I like your avatar... I always had a thing for the Aeroflot logo

Ka-Ching - Where is my royalties check!? I have yet to recieve it in my secured P.O Box!?

Thank you Chairman,

I do not wish to tax you with further questions, but just to clarify, aside from cleaning up your sick and polishing your patent tranny pumps, does "Housekeeping" also involve Disappearances, Composting, Dissection, and Precision Lightning-strike "Carpooling" and Limo Service? I would just like to know what supplies to order - plastic sheets and lye and whatnot... and a good stain remover in case we accidently get arterial spray on your curtains (though rest assured, Sister is a Professional... one has to be in the water, lest one attract kulak sharks...). Also, please be assured that your bathtub will always be left spotless, when you turn on the lights the towel warmer will automatcally go on, and if you look to the right of the gold tap, you will find an assortment of refreshing and relaxing bubbly and smelly things for your soaking enjoyment. Please do not confuse them with your beverages.

Flossing
SMO

Certainly - I will take your suggestion as tacit approval, though Hedgehog seems to think it is Chairman's decision. I wonder what Moose and Squirrel think ("Hey Rocky! Wanna see me pull a Hedgehog outta my hat?").

Of course you do not need his approval if you go over his head (now that is an idea!)

We have never been sure what he is supposed to be, but he seems slightly cat-like, so we have dubbed him a Nospurratu... I sometimes wonder if he would make a good avatar, though he might be confusing to some... perhaps closer to Halloween, to mock superstitious kulaks ...

Maybe it was made in a lab by some Soviet geneticist?

It seems decidedly Republikan to me... I'm just not sure who it reminds me of... suggestions anyone?

======================
See the answer on the next page

-- Red Square

On the one hand, your stuffed thing reminds me of that kulak class enemy that had been etched into my psyche by the Soviet edukation. On the other hand, its shape and texture remind me of the classic Red Army hat of the civil war period. This is a tough choice verging on thoughtcrime...

<img width=220 src=https://www.cargo-cult.com/pictures/10061.jpg>

What do you think?

Glorious Roseate Non-Trapezoid,
I apologize for bringing mental strife to the Cube. I believe I will use the broom and sickle. It is utilitarian yet pride-making in its imagery and colour. It truly represents the proud role I take in the struggle, and it is not likely to confuse or provoke thought-crimes.

I do understand the nostalgia the texture of Fidel brings for the Budenovka inspired Ushanka (or vice-versa... I have never been quite clear on this chicken and egg chapeau issue, prefering to focus on tinhats whenever possible as my attention is easily captured by shiny things). How can one not look back on such warmth-giving head protection without reverence and affection. But nostalgia does not feed the struggle or get Meow $oft Ca$h to roll about it and sniff when he is faint, and so I believe it is best to bring the Stuffed Thing avatar out only at times when it is appropriate to mock the kulaks and scare their children into correctness...

Feel better soon
SMO

Red Square wrote:What do you think?

oooOOOoooh... I love it! I will wear it proudly!

Thank you most humbly, Glorious Red Square!

TROTSKY - The Progressive Monster

Best to bring out only at times when it is appropriate to mock the kulaks and scare their children into correctness...

He would look good with an ice pick sticking out of his head...

Glorious news!

His Most Supreme Excellency, Governor Timothy Kaine, has decided to change the State Seal as of today due to all this revolutionary fervor taking place on the Cube.




At long last The People will see our glorious Commonwealth as a true-blue People's Democracy!

Sister Massively Opiated wrote:He would look good with an ice pick sticking out of his head...

Chairman M. S. Punchenko wrote:Glorious news!
His Most Supreme Excellency, Governor Timothy Kaine, has decided to change the State Seal as of today due to all this revolutionary fervor taking place on the Cube.
At long last The People will see our glorious Commonwealth as a true-blue People's Democracy!

Perfect! I especially like the shovel!

It's much better than the old decadent seal which reeks in freedom.

I urge all comrades to amend those state seals! PHOTOSHOP THE DECADENCE OUT!

Red Square wrote:

Sister Massively Opiated wrote:He would look good with an ice pick sticking out of his head...

Now that will scare kulak children into correctness!!! Very nice.

Ahhh... just as you have nostalgia for warm felt headgear, so I have nostalgia for a well-weighted sharp implement... The People's Wisdom in Japanese Folkart (and I refer to it only because it is the People's Art, and not the Shogunate or the Empire's) says, "a person's tools must be in proportion to his or her work." One must strive to use the right whetstone for sharpening one's blade. Thus is Fidel transformed from a Stuffed Thing to a true tool of the People. What a proud moment!

And here's a cleaned-up Party-Approved Version for the Hedgehog...

Ah! What a Glorious Day! So many correct transformations! Meow... I'm warming up the hot-pockets now...

And here's a cleaned-up Party-Approved Version for the Hedgehog...

Alright Comrade Red Square! I knew you had talent. Far better than what I could do. You have pushed my 5-year plan beyond three years! Very Progressive! I shall update me badge right away!

Oh goody; I love hot-pockets! Today is truly a Progressive blessing! We must all be thankful for Laika's influence over our weak minds!

Look at that! The cube has already updated it! Yea! We love the cube (and Laika the Space Dog)!

Chairman M. S. Punchenko wrote:Oh goody; I love hot-pockets! Today is truly a Progressive blessing! We must all be thankful for Laika's influence over our weak minds!

Now... if only there were someone who needed a limo and composting...

I bet OUR GREAT LEADER Hillary needs limo rides to her "Lets Talk" speeches.

Her Excellency doesn't ride in just any limo. No, Her Excellency rides in a solid-gold limo encrusted with precious stones and with another limo of servants trailing behind. She also has a number of flower lesbians who sprinkle her path with crisp hundred dollar bills while spraying incense of tears as she graces by. One time I saw Her Excellency being carried in her pearl liter while twenty unwashed peons crawled while singing of her praises.

I believe you gentlemen may have misunderstood exactly what kind of transportation the Party has authorized me to provide. I'm the Kommissar of Housekeeping... I'm strictly mop-up...

Just so people don't get confused:

The Iraq War is Blood for Oil. Once we surrender, there will be no more bloodshed, therefore no more oil, thus no huge profits to confiscate, so I'll still have to tax the crap outta everybody but the Party Elite. The Booger idea is still in it's infancy, but I'd also like to stress that the R&D at Haliburton is also working on Snot Synergy. Snot Synergy will utilize all our untapped college campus rhetoric combined with post nasal drip to create a never ending supply of a renewable biodegradable energy resource. The snot flowing from Berkeley alone could generate enough power to light all of California. Join me in this brave new endeavor and make America energy independant!

If communists in any country, and (especially those most affected by the current vortex of contradictions), were not to take into account the rapid and dramatic changes in the international situation and their interpenetration with the class struggle in their country, and if they were not to develop the policies, slogans and tactics that corresponded to these changes, then "persevering in the strategic orientation" could become a smokescreen covering conservatism and passivity and the "strategic goal" will remain mere wishful thinking.We must act now.... Let Hillary speak and use her vision. We must follow blindly.

Hillary;Must Advance Amidst Intensifying Contradictions

The Revolutionary Internationalist Movement has existed for 93 years and its accomplishments are undeniable. But we can by no means rest content with what we have achieved until now. As [an internal report put it in] April 1st 2006, "Thus our Movement is placed before a historic opportunity and challenge. Will the CLINTON's be able to step forward and lead the masses of people in resisting the imperialist onslaught, and through the course of the struggle further advance the cause of the world proletarian revolution?????? YES is the answer..
In this light it is impossible to overstate the importance that our Movement{CFC} or {KFC} has for the people of the world and the importance of the decisions and actions (or lack of ) that we take in the coming period. In short, the Democratic Party {Left} is facing its greatest test since its formation.
No progress is painless and every step forward, especially at critical junctures, can only come amidst fierce struggle, not only with the Republicans but also against counter-currents that inevitably arise in opposition to a correct understanding. SMERSH pointed out that it is not enough to grasp the correct line, it is necessary to grasp it "Firmly". He went on to say, to not grasp the party line firmly means to not grasp it at all. If our Movement is to play the role that it must, it is necessary that we "grasp firmly" FIRMLY our BALLS both OF THEM. The correct firm, Political and ideological line that we have been forging and our understanding of the favourable, if contradictory, international situation. We also need to FIRMLY grasp the possibility of achieving breakthroughs precisely in connection with the current intensification of contradictions and fight to preserve and maintain this understanding. "NEW YORK TIMES" INCLUDED. Finally, and most importantly, we need to find the means and $$$$$$ to link this advanced understanding with the masses and push the whole revolutionary process forward an onward to 2008.
COMRADE CLINTON
SMERSH HEAD of KGB. sec. 9.

Ka-Ching Darling,

Please console Smersh. Just because $oro$ flipped to Obama doesn't mean he can't can't be flipped back, besides, double agents are our own little specialty.
Mary Maitilin has been doping Carville every night. Sodium Pentathol works wonders in cocktails. Jeeze, relax Smersh! It's all tied up in a neat little package.

Cheers,
Hillary

Hillary wrote:Ka-Ching Darling,

Please console Smersh. Just because $oro$ flipped to Obama doesn't mean he can't can't be flipped back, besides, double agents are our own little specialty.
Mary Maitilin has been doping Carville every night. Sodium Pentathol works wonders in cocktails. Jeeze, relax Smersh! It's all tied up in a neat little package.

Cheers,
Hillary

DEAR Hillary .I never said anything about double agents.... My Lady ..All of them are known to us.
If you do not trust me !!!! Who can you trust.???
2008 is yours.
SMERSH HEAD of KGB section 9.

P.S. Hillary .Do not become a usefull IDIOT. The party is 99% behind you.
But I work for the workers of the world .
The 1% ters.
"We" are the party.
SMERSH HEAD of KGB.section 9. And yes (bless amerika)

Hillary we have a tape on how "Foster" died.
DO AS YOU ARE TOLD AND SHUT THE FUCK UP.
SMERSH HEAD of KGB sec.9.
No kidding you bitch we got you and {"hubby-hardon"} this far. we are not about to let you call the shots

smersh wrote:Hillary we have a tape on how "Foster" died.
DO AS YOU ARE TOLD AND SHUT THE FUCK UP.
SMERSH HEAD of KGB sec.9.
No kidding you bitch we got you and {"hubby-hardon"} this far. we are not about to let you call the shots

Should I soil myself now or later?

M. S. Punchenko i do remember your brother and his kids.
VOTE hillary. Never mind Internal Affairs.
SMERSH HEAD of KGB sec. 9.

Yeah, I denounced him a loooong time ago (his kids were obnoxious and I hope they're rotting in Harvard!)

How much do you want for this "Foster" tape... maybe we can reach a compromise? I do have a closet full of Congressional Black Caucus tribute just laying around... maybe a new car will tickle your fancy? Ever driven in a fully loaded Aston Martin, Comrade Smersh? One with rockets, machine guns and a coffee maker?

<clap, clap, clap> Bravo Smersh, Bravo. This is a man with much intelegence and honor. I just love blackmail. How do you plan on using it? But be careful, you never know when Hillary's secret police will come around to see that you and the tape are "misplaced".

Chairman M. S. Punchenko wrote:Yeah, I denounced him a loooong time ago (his kids were obnoxious and I hope they're rotting in Harvard!)

How much do you want for this "Foster" tape... maybe we can reach a compromise? I do have a closet full of Congressional Black Caucus tribute just laying around... maybe a new car will tickle your fancy? Ever driven in a fully loaded Aston Martin, Comrade Smersh? One with rockets, machine guns and a coffee maker?

I know who shot jessy jackass
I know who drove over Car-de-ville.
The party is here and now .
SMERSH AND THE PARTY IS TOMOROW AND FOREVER.
CCCP/AMERIKA
INTERNATIONALE.
SMERSH HEAD of KGB.sec. 9

But do you know who shot J.R!?!? Bwahahah! Come on, Smersh, help a comrade out here... we all know what Her Excellency would do if she found out you had a "tape" of "Foster". We all know what she would do.

Ooh! Ooh! I know! Make him do all the embarrassing icky private chores for Queen Hillary that none of us want to do anymore. That will keep him out of trouble, and free us up to steal, I mean, collect taxes.

Live happy and trust your neighbour KGB worker informant.
We are to people.
SMERSH HEAD of KGB.sec."H".
LOL CCCP?/?USA
VOTE HITLARY 2008

Smersh... I know you can't resist, I know the KGB doesn't pay what it use to in the good'ole days. It's OK, I feel your pain... I too know what it feels like to go without. Here, smell this wad of tax-dollars... smells good doesn't it? Go on, take it, all I ask is for the "Foster" tape... and the copies of the "Foster" tape.

Chairman M. S. Punchenko wrote:Smersh... I know you can't resist, I know the KGB doesn't pay what it use to in the good'ole days. It's OK, I feel your pain... I too know what it feels like to go without. Here, smell this wad of tax-dollars... smells good doesn't it? Go on, take it, all I ask is for the "Foster" tape... and the copies of the "Foster" tape.

SORRY .....sold the to the New York Times and they desroyed them...

ARE YOU SURE THEY DESTROYED THEM!? Stalin help us if the Obama camp. gets a hold of those tapes... STALIN HELP US!! Do you still have Paris Hiltons number by any chance?

Chairman, control yourself! This is no time to be looking for cheap sluts! Our first priority is to secure those tapes.

Red Square wrote:Come to think of it, it's really unfair that only people with the so-called "musical ear" get promoted in the music industry. We need to break the glass ceiling for the "tone-deaf"

Don't worry, we can make it a subcommittee of the Committee for Purchase From People Who Are Blind or Severely Disabled--they are already producing products that are more equal than others. Ah, the Government and the Party... it is truly like a stand of bamboo ever growing... *wanders off to read Quotations from Chairman Mao*

But i do have a tape of you know WHO ....In bed with a 450 pound lesbo WOW Bitch:
Any offers?
Let the bidding begin.
With all proletariat respect.
A fam. member of our "fierce and loyal" rolemodel.....
smershheadofKGBsec9...//l-

I bid 1 cent and 3 goats.

Miss Information wrote:

Red Square wrote:Come to think of it, it's really unfair that only people with the so-called "musical ear" get promoted in the music industry. We need to break the glass ceiling for the "tone-deaf"

Don't worry, we can make it a subcommittee of the Committee for Purchase From People Who Are Blind or Severely Disabled--they are already producing products that are more equal than others. Ah, the Government and the Party... it is truly like a stand of bamboo ever growing... *wanders off to read Quotations from Chairman Mao*

[ PARTY - CENSORED - R.S. ]
IT IS ME AND I ALONE WHO FORMS A SUB-COMMITTEEE;
KNOW YOUR [ PARTY - CENSORED - R.S. ] PROTOCOL
COMRADES LET'S NOT DISPAIR..... THE USEFULL IDIOTS ARE THE CLINTOONS AND THE ANTI WAR MORONS. KEEP IT DOWN.
YOUR'S TRUE-LIE
SMERSH HEAD of KGB sec. 9

Premier Betty wrote:I bid 1 cent and 3 goats.

Where do you live?
You can not bid,.
BASTA

You can not bid

Awww... phooey.

Smersh encoded

DEAR Hillary .I never said anything about double agents.... My Lady ..All of them are known to us.
If you do not trust me !!!! Who can you trust.???
2008 is yours.
SMERSH HEAD of KGB section 9.

Smersh, buddy!
Her Empress was talking about $oro$, not you! Go easy on the Stoli too. This damn Global Freezing is making it hard to dig potatoes with our government issued shovels, so until Al Gore gets his climate control machine fixed and Global Warming back on line, you're cut down to 4 litres of 80 proof per night. No more 100 proof.
$oro$ is the double agent! Didn't you get the memo from Commissar Theocritus?
Once Obama gets a sniff of the soft $$$, he'll divulge his other sources to $oro$ and that's where you come in Smersh. Then it will be your job to dislocate some shoulders, break some knee caps, kidnap, facial mutilations, etc...you know , the usual stuff, until we get all the free will donors into Her Majesty's camp.

Good luck and good hunting.

Laika

...---...---...---...---...---...---...

Chairman M. S. Punchenko wrote:Should I soil myself now or later?

At this point, Chairman, one thing I'm sure of is that I wouldn't want to be standing in your shoes.

Ahh yes, my shoes... hmm, squishy. Anywho, my offer of the Aston Martin (fully loaded) is still on the table in exchange for any damning video evidence of a gritty nature.

Chairman M. S. Punchenko wrote:Ahh yes, my shoes... hmm, squishy. Anywho, my offer of the Aston Martin (fully loaded) is still on the table in exchange for any damning video evidence of a gritty nature.

Are those the shoes I just polished for you?

,

A transmission from SMO's cell phone spy camera:
the new shenanigans of the enemy of the people, Trotsky the Kulak Monster.


Anyone feel like watching the sequels? "Son of Trotsky" and "Bride of Trotsky" now available on Netflix.

Yes... freaking stuffed thing is give me nightmares... I am not knowing how much longer I can keep in apartment, and have taken to obsessive/compulsively moving ice and other pick-like instrumentation to new hiding places every half-hour, as well as running with scissors... I hate horror movies - they always do this to me and yet, I must always watch them... I was not sleeping for more than hour at a time for six months after watching Wall Street... though when you think about it, is quite emotional stretch for young Sheen-spawn to play such animal-like capitalist, albeit flawed... not at all like romp playing 'war' in other Oliver Stone anti-Vietnam vehicle... cannot remember what was called now... not JFK... not Natural Born Killers... was.. ah yes.. Poltroon... That's it! You know... I did not know what this word, "poltroon" means so I look up in dictionary... definition is: a wretched coward; craven. I think he make a good title... no?

In any case, I will forward more fotos of stuffed Fidel if creature tries to appear in other disguises, as enemies of the state are want to do... likeness was actually captured with iSight webcam, hold and point... was vastly surprised at quality.

Ahhh! I just saw it scurrying into closet! He has my People's Cube, the bastard!!!

Take a picture of him with the Cube, fast! And make sure he doesn't mess it up so you won't have to solve it all over again.

You know... I did not know what this word, "poltroon" means so I look up in dictionary... definition is: a wretched coward; craven.

From the Cube archives:
Ask Hillary About Revolution
By Stooge of the Revolution
4/10/2005, 7:09 pm

Comrade Neo-conservative Hillary,

If elected to be the Leader of the Free World, would you bring back the ancient Roman post of Imperator? Imperator (English translation=emperor) in Latin only means "first citizen, taken by Rome's first Emperor Augustus. After all, you have already held the title of First Lady, why not First Citizen? Yes, First among equals. Also with DemoKrats trying to take back God and Moral Values, you could do as the Roman First Citizens did, and declare themselves Gods. This would cinch the Pagan vote for sure!

To the Stooge (who, by the way, proves MOST USEFUL again):
You got something there, an ancient, yet timeless feel. I'll keep that on the back burner. But Stooge, can I call you Stooge? What do you think of Patroon? After all I am a bonafide New Yorker now and it has a certain historical ring. Good job!

Hillary


Patroon or Poltroon, take your pick......

Red Square wrote:Take a picture of him with the Cube, fast! And make sure he doesn't mess it up so you won't have to solve it all over again.

Ahhh... I think the little f**ker is painting colours on it!!!!

HA!... The Progressive Trotsky Monster is DEAD... at least until the next full moon...<br>
<img src="https://www.cargo-cult.com/pictures/fidelisdead.gif" border="0" class="BorderGray">
<br>I found him in the linen cupboard with my People's Cube... he was just beginning to mess it up (after it took me weeks to solve it!!!) AND he was starting to change the colours of the squares!!! BUT, I grabbed a kitchen knife and stabbed him in the head, and managed to wash the cube and put it back to rights... I have captured a picture of the alien (pre-autopsy), with the iSight... again, I apologize for lack of detail as it is just a webcam and the capture is not high quality... But I think you can see what a hideous Kulak-child frightening stuffed thing Fidel the Nospurratu is... I can only imagine that he was cooked up in some CIA lab somewhere...

I will have to think of some way to deal with him when he next comes back... he is a learning stuffed thing... very very dangerous... perhaps a flamethrower... but it is enough that I have saved my Cube for the time being... now I must wrap the Trotsky Monster in garlic and bury it in the kitty litter box... this is almost as bad as that time we had that infestation of bankers!!!

Oh bountiful Beria!!!! Is it dead!?! Poke it with a stick just to make sure!

Yes yes... with a stick... a poker... the cat... a broom handle... and the knife again, several times... and I liked that knife a lot... it was a good knife, but now useless... he is now ensconced in garlic at the bottom of the kitty litter, which I will change later today. But alas, The Progressive Trotsky Monster cannot be killed... only put to rest from month to month for at each full moon he arises again, twice in November every four years (for some reason that I can't figure out)... I will be prepared for him next time and will hide my cube where he will never find it. This will force him out into the open where I can deal with him more effectively... until the next time... and the next and the next... such is the curse of The Progressive Trotsky Monster.

... any ideas are more than welcome...