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Kosovo Delegation Kills Serbian Delegation During Talks

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A final attempt for a one-sided compromise between Serbs and Albanians on the status of Kosovo ended abruptly Wednesday, the fourth day of face-to-face negotiations in New York, when the Albanian delegation opened fire on the Serbian delegation, killing everyone.

The international community condemned the resulting Serbian intransigence, but hailed the meeting as an overall success. "This is more proof that self-determination for Kosovo Albanians is the only rational solution," said American envoy Frank Wisner.

President Bush announced that the so-called massacre of the Serbian delegation has made it necessary once again to bomb Serbia and teach those nationalists a lesson.

ImageRuins of a Christian church in Kosovo blown up by Muslim Albanian urban planners after it was deemed unsuitable for conversion to a mosque.

ImageA team of Albanian interior decorators evaluate the scope of work at the freshly ruined St. George Cathedral. (As usual, Serbian nationalists claimed they were a "Muslim mob looting and reveling in the ruins.")

ImageAlbanian interior decorators take a break from redecorating 14th century churches to participate in a planning conference and receive instructions from the boss.

ImageBritish peacekeepers protect one of the few remaining churches in Kosovo from Albanian architects.

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St. Patrick's Cathedral in New York. In the afternoon after the shooting, the Kosovo delegation took a guided tour of New York churches and synagogues while taking notes and asking for architectural blueprints.

"The Kosovars are only trying to help the Serbs to arrive at a permanent position," said former Secretary of State Madeleine Albright, whose experience includes intimate knowledge of the KLA (UCK) leadership. "It is the only approach they know, it's worked for them in the past, and we must respect that. Remember Munich."

Image MODERNITY REACHES KOSOVO: An Albanian Muslim youth uses his mobile phone to take a picture of his friend urinating in the entryway of St. George church in the southern Kosovo town of Prizren, hoping to score a grant from the National Endowment for the Arts with a "Sprinkle On Relics" project.

"We should have seen this compromise coming," said Undersecretary of State Nicholas Burns, "The Albanian side has had the courtesy to repeatedly warn us that no further delays for independence would be tolerated, and we should all be relieved that a compromise was reached before the December 10th deadline they gave us. Had we passed it, Albanians would next seek similar compromises with us. So this worked out for everyone."

Image UN peacekeeper inspects improvements made to 14th century Serbian Monastery by Muslim architects of Kosovo.

The State Department, EU parliamentarians, and every newspaper of the world agree that the shooting was justified by a legitimate anger that the Kosovo-Albanian leadership must have felt over the previous delays caused by their propensity to murder every Serbian delegation they met with. EU officials have reprimanded the Serbs for the high rotation level of their diplomatic cadre, while praising the Albanians for their steadfast approach to a final solution for Kosovo. The outcome has proved Clinton-era ambassador Richard Holbrooke wrong when he advised Albanians that it would be easier to get independence if they'd "stop killing Serbs."

Holbrooke conceded as much, saying he is glad to see the end of "this cycle that's been going on for two decades: the Bosnians and Albanians kill Serbs; we bomb those murderous Serb assholes; the Bosnians/Albanians get more power and land and start shooting at American and other international troops so they can get even more power and land, and so on."

Critics of Serb-killing, however, have repeatedly compared Western support of the Greater Albania project to the comedy Groundhog Day, only with bombs, deaths, and destruction. In other words, the multiculturalist community wakes up in the morning, steps on the same rake as yesterday, gets hit in the head, and claims another success before passing out. After twenty years of being stuck in this continuous loop, the cumulative volume of successes has become almost unbearable.

The latest success came last week, when a Bosnian Muslim tried to blow up the American embassy in Austria. That success follows on the heels of our May success, in which four Albanians were about to massacre U.S. soldiers at Ft. Dix had it not been for a racist Circuit City clerk. That success followed a February success in which a Bosnian Muslim in Salt Lake City killed five Americans.

"All sides have given us indications that they wish this process to continue," said European Union mediator Wolfgang Ischinger. "This is a good sign for the future."

On its way out of the meeting, the Albanian delegation asked for Madeleine Albright to come in and clean up the place.

FROM THE PEOPLE'S CUBE FILES:


Image"Unleash that diplomatic side of yours through dirty talking. Describe your fantasies about world peace, but please resist the temptation of physical action."
Madeleine Albright

How to Talk Dirty and Influence People

In 1999, Secretary of State Madeleine Albright was mistaken for a cleaning lady by the Albanian delegation during peace negotiations for Kosovo in Rambouillet, France.

"One member of the delegation, who didn't realize who she was, and probably thinking she was some cleaning lady because it was after midnight, simply said to her, 'Give us five minutes and please go away,'" recalled Albanian diplomat Dugagjin Gorani in War on Europe, a British TV program.

Albright reportedly responded by using language which could never be translated into Albanian.

This photo was taken after the error was realized and all was forgiven. Albright in turn apologized for adding to the confusion by flying in to meetings on a broom.

According to other accounts, however, it was the dirty talk that made the Albanians mistake her for the cleaning lady in the first place, and the picture was taken before the error was realized.

Reporting by Julia Gorin and Comrade Red Square

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Finally we are actually talking about an American led war effort THAT MADE SENSE! All we need to do now is hand Russia over the Chechnya, Israel over to Syria/Iran, and top it all off with a strategic surrender of South Korea over to the more tolerant and peaceful Democratic People's Republic of Korea (come on folks, they have DEMOCRATIC in their official name, they must be the good guys!).

Yes, that would be a great start! And while we're at it, let's hand Taiwan over to China and do some appeasing there too! How about it comrades!? I'm sure Mad would love to do some more diplomatic work on behalf of the Transnational Socialist collective found only at the U.N (and now playing in the E.U too!).

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I think this is a job for... the Purple Jihad!
"Yesh, darling, what some curtains and a bit of spray paint would do for this interior!"
I envision a whole series;

Now,
brought to you by 'the People's Cube'
in association with People's Cube industries
sponsored by People's Cube
and underwritten by a grant from the People's Cube
(and WGBH, Boston)
it's

"Queer Muslim Terrorist Eye for the Straight Serbii!"

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In the good old days of the Cheka back in Moscow, unecessary churches (all of them, actually) were converted into things far more useful to the proletariat. I speak, of course, of the all-union museums of atheism and parapsychology. By such conversions, it helped us to successfully eliminate the gathering places where the masses partook in their Opiates (paraphrased from Vladimir Illych himself PBUH), and allowed the party organs to subsitute a far more socially responsible system of guaranteed healthcare and five-year-plans. And we didn't hear a single complaint!

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I should plan a trip to Kosovo and collect some of these Christian relics and sell them on E-Bay to starving progressive artist for "better use". Clearly these Albanians aren't fully desecrating them enough. I mean, any Abu, Tafir and Hammed can "sprinkle the relics" - but it takes a seasoned progressive artist with a keen eye for bad taste to really - and I mean really - tarnish the relics.

And if I can't find a good artist to do some tarnishing for the Greater Good, well, there is always Hollywood waiting in the wings.

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And we didn't hear a single complaint!
Of course not Arkady! Liquidation has that kind of effect.
We always forget about the Socialist Utopia of Albania and the wonderful progress they gave the world.....Like the Skanderbeg SS Division, the original 20th century "ethnic cleansers".
Besides Al Qaeda needs a stronger foothold in Europe.

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I do have questions however, was this Madame Halfbright assigned to her task by the Ministry of Housekeeping SMO? If so, did she receive scale pay? Alas, I must confess my weakness here comrades in regard to who we as the party are to support. On the one paw we have those peace loving Muslims who as we know detest this false Christian god as they should. On the other paw, we have those fun loving Serbs who while tainted by allegedly being "Christian," have a real appreciation for heavy handed tactics and mass murder, not to mention being the only group to ever shoot down one of the warmongering capitalist's "stealth" bombers. Laika, please send me a transmission, or Chairman, send me a memo please.

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Chairman M. S. Punchenko wrote:I should plan a trip to Kosovo and collect some of these Christian relics and sell them on E-Bay to starving progressive artist for "better use". Clearly these Albanians aren't fully desecrating them enough. I mean, any Abu, Tafir and Hammed can "sprinkle the relics" - but it takes a seasoned progressive artist with a keen eye for bad taste to really - and I mean really - tarnish the relics.

And if I can't find a good artist to do some tarnishing for the Greater Good, well, there is always Hollywood waiting in the wings.

The Honorable Chairman, Christian relics will bring you very little financial gain, and I do sense the word Capitalism with this selling on E-bay thing. However, if it is for our cause then perhaps we should paint the relics with a colored lead based paint and slowly poison the all consuming Capatilists. Use the funds to promote Hillary, and then gather the 38 million illegal immigrants for our Army and eventually take over the Churches. More relics! A win/win yes?

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Who cares about selling the relics? Just keep them as a memento of your great deeds, and the rewards that followed.

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To Trotsky with those worthless relics. I need an answer to my questions above! I need some guidance. Laika, Chairman....

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Comrade Bubalasky:

I don't care what you "sense", Comrade. Me selling Christofascist relics to needy progressive artist who want to express themselves in a distasteful yet morally-superior way (because, after all, they're progressives) is not "Capitalism".

I like to my call my service Caring About the Arts™, Comrade Bubalasky. You do want the arts to flourish, don't you? Do you want little Susie or little Johnny to go to bed tonight without using finger-paints to depict Christians being fed to lions to appease President Ahmydinnerjacket? Don't you want little Susie and little Johnny to go to school and have relics to poop on and later submit as art? What will their underpaid educator think if they don't turn in some soiled relics? Is little Susie and little Johnnie suppose to get a bad grade for their art assignment just because you think my noble service on behalf of the Common Good™ is "Capitalist" in nature? No, Comrade. NO! The Children™ shouldn't have to suffer, Comade Bubalasky! Give the Children™ their relics! Give the Children™ the tools and the Metamucil that they will need to turn something old, outmoded and intolerant into something thought provoking, beautiful and awe-inspiring! That, Comrade Bubalasky, is why the Party is here to help! We are here to help little Susie and little Johnnie!

WE ARE HERE FOR THE CHILDREN™!

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Has a special day been declared to commemorate the glorious victory of the People (under the leadership of our Empress's husband) over the fascist and racist Serbs? After all, was this not the first war fought by the West to protect the oppressed masses, victims of the White Man? Think of how much potential capitalist reaction had to be squelched by our Empress's husband to pull off such a feat! The Party's intellectual resources were mobilized to their maximum effect. Let us look forward to the day (coming soon) when such wars will be commonplace, and justice will reign.

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On further reflection, I can understand that the Party line would be in favor for the Albanians because of course The Empress' former "husband" fought the Serbs. But it's not that simple is it? After all, now we have the Bushitler supporting the Albanians, and lets not forget, the Motherland is firmly in the Serbs corner. With all these contradictions, wouldn't it be wiser for us to alternate our support on a daily basis? Or perhaps simply determine who we support depending on whom we are adressing? We can always say that Hillary never supported the Albanians, that she has always been on the same side as our Motherland, and after all, the Serbs are a fun loving bunch who know how to use a Wall the way it was intended. There are just too many potential problems no matter which way we go unless we are flexible among ourselves, and put forth a complete denial we ever pulled for the other side depending on what our needs are at the moment. Shoot, even if the Bill allegedly fought the Serbs, I think is very possible he will be a non-person once his usefulness comes to an end in helping the Empress being elected.

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When contemplating what side of an issue to take, Commissar Pupovich; it is wise to ask yourself one question: What side will bring about an end to Western Civilization?

What will put an end to Western Civilization quicker... Albanian Muslims securing a foothold for Al Qaeda in Europe or Serbia's Milosevich (who is now voting Democrat)?

Well, clearly, the Serbs are no longer enlightened progressives under the benevolent hand of the Soviet Union (which is no longer the Soviet Union and is instead called the "Russian Federation"... or something Imperialist to that effect). And let us not forget that this... this... "Russia" is using the old standards of the Czar to add insult to injury. The Soviet Union is dead, Commissar. I know, it's hard for me too. But now we have to look towards the future and take control of Amerika so we can build socialism here (and then use Amerika's military and vast wealth to spread socialism all across the world). Where the Soviet Union failed we will succeed!

In order for us to kill the beast that is the West we must help our Muslim friends start with their closest neighbors which happens to be Europe. And then after Europe we will move onto America followed by a stop in China (those deviationist bastards! How dare they experiment with Capitalism! HOW DARE THEY!). This is progress, Commissar Pupovich. Aiding those who pose a greater threat to America's interest is progress. And hopefully, in time, the Balkanization of America will begin with the help of our friends South of the border.

Do you understand now, Commissar? Picking sides is easy when one side helps bring about the fall of Western Civilization faster.

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Thank you Chairman, that is exactly the clarity of thinking I needed, Most of the time it is clear who to support, but I just get confused with what side we were on in that Bosnia affair. You are so right about this Russian Federation... but we do love Putin right? I know it did my heart good to see those Russian bombers in the air near Alaska again.

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Chairman - I think you just hit the jackpot with the ultimate Democrat slogan in the coming election (and all future elections, if any). <h3>Democrats: Where the Soviet Union failed we will succeed!</h3>

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Laika, Chairman....
Buehler?....anybody?

The Chairman was most correct in his Global analysis. Once the Serbs are defeated, the door is wide open. They've only been holding back progress for 700 years.

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Chairmean M.S. Punchenko, since France decided for Sarkozy you are right about Al Queda needing to gain a foothold in Europe, but can't we get to Socialism faster here with just voting in Hillary and adopting Al Gore's inconvenient truth?

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The lessons learned from the USSR's demise tell us that true socialism can't be built in one country separately from the rest of the world. Historical inevitability calls for a global change of the power structure. A world-wide revolution is what we need to achieve The Progressive World of Next Tuesday™.

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Mr. Square,

I am ready for this world-wide revolution! But next Tuesday? Who will lead us Empress Pinkie or the many titted Hillary? Shouldn't we get the My Space mush minds on board? (No offence to Ivan intended). Can we get 6 billion people to read the cube in a week? Is it possible to change the power stucture of a world that is so embedded in ignorance that quickly? Or does this ignorance empower us such as it has done for Congress? And last, but not least, where can we attain enough money to buy our power this quickly? George Soros the Philanthropist, Bill Gates the Geek, or the Dell guy? Maybe Mark Cuban, then we can include Basketball and Dancing. I have so many un-answered questions. Perhaps another Vodka will help!

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Hmmmm, ok, I was thinking of bringing this up in the bunker, but perhaps an open discussion of this would be more appropriate. Comrades, this Pup does not see himself as a heavy thinker, no, I prefer the party to do my thinking. But hey, Laika and the Pup are the only dogs here, and as a well tuned, trustworthy guard dog, all I can say is that the Pup smells trouble with a capitol T! I have been trying to warn everyone that perhaps it is not wise to cozy up too closely to these Islamic idiots, even if they can be useful at times. This post by Red Square was the final straw that made me realize it is my duty to bark loudly in warning.

First off, I don't believe it is necessary to remind everyone that Iran's religion considers socialist doctrine as a sin to be destroyed where ever found. But it goes much deeper than this. The Ayatollah Kohmenni was a firm believer in perpetual revolution on a global scale. So what is the error there you ask comrades? Well, it is the same doctrine put forth by the still non-person T! I hate to say this, but even our Beloved Red Square has just posted a doctrine that non-person T would agree with.

I must also remind my comrades of some other things. I have been seeing all this talk of how the motherland "failed" and that it is no more. I beg to differ. I see what Russia did as more along the line of the strategic withdrawal the South embraced in the War of Northern Aggression. They saw that the economic and industrial might of the North was overwhelming at the time, so they withdrew from the battle field for a more opportune time they knew would come. Now let us consider the Motherland. What has happened from a cold logical progressive point of view? Well, the Motherland under the guise of "breaking up" managed to loose themselves of some "dead wood" they had to support for so many years. The motherland knew they had a huge oil reserve, on a par perhaps greater than the Gulf States, they just didn't have the equipment, expertise, and infrastructure to take advantage of this at the time. So what do we see now comrades? We see the Motherland has built their pipelines, have lured the capital and expertise to begin to exploit their oil, and now what are we seeing? We are seeing a great man, Putin (and who can deny his leadership abilities?) bringing the motherland back both economically and militarily. He has the western powers quaking in their sandals as the superior Russian bombers are routinely flying off of Alaska and the US mainland. So lets not hear any more of this negative talk about the Motherland comrades! It is coming back with a vengeance!

I know this is long, but I wish to explore some more needs. I believe we may have been too caught up in our own box. Just as in physics, the search is on for a Unified Field Theory, a theory of Everything.,,, I believe we need to embark on developing a unified party doctrine that covers the gamut, one that is not lending favor to one branch of useful idiots such as the jihadists, and another that lends credence to other misguided doctrines such as in Venezuela or even Canada whenever it seems on the surface to meet some temporary need. No, we need to unify our doctrine, and not let it be used and abused for temporary gains. While Iran may have it's uses at times, we should condemn it as strongly as we condemn the Bushitler here. There is no long term gain to be had by diluting the truth of progressivism just so we don't offend some 2 bit third world nation. No, it is time we be strong, unyielding in our movement. We are on the march comrades, and we should treat all heresies to the Party for what they are, false and dangerous. To do that, we need a grand unified doctrine that we never waver from even in a minor way.

OK, I know I have no doubt gone too far. I have my dulled shovel ready comrades, I have even set aside the cost of my bullet if that is to be my fate for trying to spread some alarm.

Heil Hillary! Heil Progressiveism! Heil the Party!

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How surreptitiuos! A conspiracy beyond belief! But brilliant! Did Boris Yelstin start this or is Putin responsible? Russia has no debt... While Amerika wallow's in it. Obviously Putin is a Historian, such as yourself, and listened to Comrade Lenin "When we go to hang the capitalist, they will sell us the rope".

You talk about Venezuela and Canada with their temporary needs, they too are in quest of power but do not see the big picture like you!!!

Heil the Great Pupovich! Let us start the Doctrine and we can be known as the Fore Fathers!!

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Hold off on any praise Comrade, for the Pup is hardly worth praise, and we know not how our more learned and powerful comrades will treat the Pup's comments. You don't want to be put up against the Wall with the Pup if it can be helped, though I would be proud to face the judgment with a stalwart comrade such as you.

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<Sigh> I too once felt the same way as you, Commissar Pupovich. When I found out Putin was offing a few journalists here and there I felt like a young Soviet boy again pointing out thought criminals to the NKVD. Sadly enough though, Russia has a growing Freedom Fighter population and a low fertility rate along with the rest of Europe (which is why local governments are giving away prizes to people who produce children).

Not to fear, Pupovich, because this is good news since Russia has betrayed her principles when she turned her back on Socialism (WHICH WORKS NO MATTER WHAT THEY SAY!). So in order to bring down America, Europe, China and Russia; we the Party have to "encourage" this growing Muslim population in the former Motherland so that all the Motherland's nuclear capabilities will fall into the proper hands. Now that's Progress, Comrades!

A link for the Pup.

After the fall of all things "Western" (start the dramatic music) we can finally start a new world! Yes! A world devoid of want where peasants and elitist toil together in the Progressive World of Next Tuesday! Yes! Yes! We will have Pure Communism again and will live in hunter-gatherer communities! No, wait, no hunting... meat is murder. We will live in gatherer communities (much better) where everyone is at last equal! <tearing up> And the Children... the Children will at last be happy! Ah yes! And then, finally, the Inner Party will be worshipped AS GODS! Mwahahahaha! And the People will build temples to us and worship us and… and… ummmm, did I give away too much of the plan again? Whoops, sorry, just ignore that last part about us becoming gods and all that other stuff. Yeah, just forget it.

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Chairman, while your wisdom is legendary, where you saw difficulties in that article, I saw opportunities. Did you not see the progress of the rise of nationalism in the Motherland? You of all people Chairman should know that we have tried and true mechanisms for taking care of a problem population. Even before we go into that tool box, I am sure I would be honored to go to the Motherland and make many contributions to the population crisis, as I am sure there are many others who would.

It is true that our Motherland did go down some roads that seemed quite anti-socialist for a time, but I do think that was only to lure the capitalists to sell us "that rope" we needed to exploit our oil wealth, and now that it is coming to fruition, we will use that wealth For the People™. And look at the wonderful way Comrade Putin is controlling his "succession" of power! Just like old times!

On a more serious vein however, we need to look beyond the alleged benefits of encouraging these Muslims in our battle against the western imperialist warmongerers. As I have hopefully demonstrated, the jihadists and their ilk do not need our encouragement to attack the west. Oh, they are quite happy to do this regardless of our encouragement. But now we must look further down the road. Lets imagine that these Muslims succeed in their goals. Into whose hands will these nuclear weapons fall? Into whose hands will the Motherland's and Europe's conventional military might fall? These people hate Progressives as much as they do the warmongers. We will only be exchanging one enemy to overcome with another, an enemy that will not be nearly as easy to defeat short of nuking, which of course ruins the property values.

It is an easy thing, even if slow, to overcome the imperialist west. Look at the amazing progress we have made here in the very heart of imperialism without so much as the cost of a bullet. This western enemy is fat on the sweat of the common man, they are weak and lazy. Will it be so simple to bring these newly victorious Muslims into line? People who have known much suffering at the hands of the imperialists?

We must have faith in the power of pure Progressive doctrine. We need not make "deals" or overlook the many flaws that these other groups have in order for our Perfected Progressiveness *patent applied for* to overcome. Courage Comrade! Courage!

Please forgive this upstart Commissar Chairman. I do not wish to be thought of as someone trying to think. I denounce free thinking! No, far be it from me to think. It is just my guard dog instincts that is making the fur on my back rise... I think I smell danger lurking in this molly coddling of jihadists and other rogue, alleged progressive states just because we can use them for temporary gain.

Heil Hillary! Heil Progressiveness! Heil Hillary!

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"Let us start the Doctrine and we can be known as the Fore Fathers!! "

Some of us are content in the party to be hailed merely as the foreskins!

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<heavy sigh> Commissar Pupovich... you think too much, which, in itself, is a denunciation. Were we wrong when we said Socialism works? Were we wrong when we sent millions to their death for counter-revolutionary leanings? Were we wrong when we liberated our fellow comrades in the Eastern Bloc from the tyranny of liberty and free-markets? Huh? When were we wrong, Commissar Pupovich? When has the Party ever made a mistake? I'll tell you, Commissar Pupovich... WE HAVE NEVER MADE A MISTAKE! NEVER, EVER, EVER! END OF STORY!

With that said, our alliance with the Freedom Fighters will remain regardless of this reactionary alarmism you have fallen prey to, Comrade Commissar. Personally, I suggest you vamp up your meds before someone has you "put away" for a while. Just a suggestion.

WHERE THE SOVIET UNION FAILED WE WILL SUCCEED! SOCIALISM: TRIED AND TRUE FOR A BETTER AMERICA!

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Of course socialism works, works better than ever! Which again goes to the heart of what I have said Chairman. Please don't think that I have ever suggested there was an error in Party Doctrine. Far be it from this Commissar. In fact, I have merely said that because we are perfect, we should never back away from it for any reason. I am just suggesting that we weaken our position for instance, when on the one hand, we rightly glorify he/she/it right to have relations with he/she/it in any possible combination thereof, then have to excuse or otherwise ignore the decidedly non-progressive Muslims hanging of such progressives in their lands. I have also merely pointed out the way their former leader, Kohmenni, essentially advocated the same doctrine that non-person T was guilty of. Oh Chairman, don't you see? The Pup is merely so in love with the Perfection that Progressive Socialism represents, that he only wishes that we never allow it to be soft pedaled in any way shape or form. But perhaps I am just too enamored with our motherland, and believe with all my heart that they too will rise along with the US, to lead the world into the Worker's Paradise we all desire. I just see these muslims and other wannabes as something holding us back.

Of course we have never ever made a mistake, and anyone who thinks so obviously is misinterpreting the facts.

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Commissar Pupovich wrote:Of course socialism works, works better than ever! Which again goes to the heart of what I have said Chairman. Please don't think that I have ever suggested there was an error in Party Doctrine. Far be it from this Commissar. In fact, I have merely said that because we are perfect, we should never back away from it for any reason. I am just suggesting that we weaken our position for instance, when on the one hand, we rightly glorify he/she/it right to have relations with he/she/it in any possible combination thereof, then have to excuse or otherwise ignore the decidedly non-progressive Muslims hanging of such progressives in their lands. I have also merely pointed out the way their former leader, Kohmenni, essentially advocated the same doctrine that non-person T was guilty of. Oh Chairman, don't you see? The Pup is merely so in love with the Perfection that Progressive Socialism represents, that he only wishes that we never allow it to be soft pedaled in any way shape or form. But perhaps I am just too enamored with our motherland, and believe with all my heart that they too will rise along with the US, to lead the world into the Worker's Paradise we all desire. I just see these muslims and other wannabes as something holding us back.

Of course we have never ever made a mistake, and anyone who thinks so obviously is misinterpreting the facts.

Good doggy. Now sit. Roll over.

For my part I don't think but KNOW! that the party is perfect and, due to its perfection, it would be impossible for it to make an error EVEN if the error were proven to be incontrovertible by those with a knack for numbers the perfection of the party would nevertheless prove to purify and perfect that error such that it were no longer error but became truth through the alchemical perfection that perfects every decision the party makes.

Similarly I know that the fellow travelers in the Muslim community receive perfect rules from the perfection of Allah, the perfect ruler of the universe (may his name never smell like old cheese) through the perfect messenger person of Muhammed (may his name always appear on athletic shoes). IF those laws and edicts of the perfection which is Allah (may his name ever hang over the doorways of bathrooms) seem bizarre, ill headed, suicidal, flawed, ridiculous or risible the fault lies NOT in the law NOR in Allah (may his name never grow hairy) but in the imperfect ability of my flawed and puny mind to comprehend the immensity and perfection of each jott, tittle, and iota (or whatever) handed down from Allah, the perfect perfecter of this squalid universe (may his name never be covered in guacamole) to his servant Muhammed (may he never contract genital warts).

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Commissar Pupovich, let us step back, together, and look at the bigger picture using Progressive Logic™. OK, ready? Alright, now then, how do we know that the Muslims aren't progressive? Huh? How do we know that? Are we supposed to sit here and trust the lies that are forced down on us by Faux News and the Bush Administration? I mean, this Administration with their media allies have sold us a war based on LIES, LIES AND MORE LIES! We also know that 9/11 was an inside job to justify the AmeriKKKan Empire's expansion. So, tell me, how can you trust a government that intentionally lies to the People? How do we know that Iran isn't a Worker's Paradise already? Maybe they are, Commissar, and that maybe is enough for the Party to put its full support behind their efforts.

Can we really trust the propaganda that is dished out everyday by a media under the thumb of the Bushitler? I mean, these people deny that the moon landing was a hoax, Commissar! They also deny the benefits and achievements of a totalitarian society! How can we trust them? We can't, Commissar. We can't trust the disinformation. And to add insult to injury, I have the documents TO PROVE that President Ahmadinejad NEVER visited Columbia University or said any insensitive comments about Homo-Americans. It never happened, Comrade Commissar. Please, don't fall for the lies of the Bush Administration like so many before you.

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You bring up some excellent points Chairman, perhaps I did fall for the lie that was really Abujihadibubbabumstan on that stage. How can I even know if the Koran is even what I have seen? Still, I think we need to be careful just in case, the odd case, that we were indeed seeing the real muslim thought. I guess I was just worried that even if these alleged muslims were to win, yes, that would help us achieve our goals here in the US, but I want the world to be under perfect Progressivism, and had concluded that while we would have the US where we want them, we would just have another enemy to destroy on our aim for world domination.

I do thank you Chairman for your patience with a lowly Commissar, but I am sure you can at least see that my intentions were good, my heart is set on the achievement of Perfect Progressiveness world wide. I was no doubt out of line trying to contribute to Party Doctrine. I do hope though that perhaps I have shown some potential and perhaps you and the other Party intelligentsia will take me under your wing and help me to grow and perhaps one day, become a contributer to advanced Party doctrine development.

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Chairman M. S. Punchenko wrote:Commissar Pupovich, let us step back, together, and look at the bigger picture using Progressive Logic™. OK, ready? Alright, now then, how do we know that the Muslims aren't progressive? Huh? How do we know that? Are we supposed to sit here and trust the lies that are forced down on us by Faux News and the Bush Administration? I mean, this Administration with their media allies have sold us a war based on LIES, LIES AND MORE LIES! We also know that 9/11 was an inside job to justify the AmeriKKKan Empire's expansion. So, tell me, how can you trust a government that intentionally lies to the People? How do we know that Iran isn't a Worker's Paradise already? Maybe they are, Commissar, and that maybe is enough for the Party to put its full support behind their efforts.

Can we really trust the propaganda that is dished out everyday by a media under the thumb of the Bushitler? I mean, these people deny that the moon landing was a hoax, Commissar! They also deny the benefits and achievements of a totalitarian society! How can we trust them? We can't, Commissar. We can't trust the disinformation. And to add insult to injury, I have the documents TO PROVE that President Ahmadinejad NEVER visited Columbia University or said any insensitive comments about Homo-Americans. It never happened, Comrade Commissar. Please, don't fall for the lies of the Bush Administration like so many before you.

Ditto!
Taggart & Lamar
Besides, maybe Iran IS an earthly paradise. You, O comrade Pupovich, merely need to lower your standard of what paradise is so that it corresponds to the reality of what paradise is.

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Yes, perhaps you have a point. I am beginning to wonder if the Iranian psychologist I speak to regularly may indeed be a Bushitler plant! Sure, she disappeared for a month and claims she went home to visit... but how can I really know for sure?

Yet there is still a bit that worries me.... after all, I am a dog, and we dogs can sense things mere humans cannot.

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Commissar Pupovich wrote:
Yet there is still a bit that worries me.... after all, I am a dog, and we dogs can sense things mere humans cannot.

Maybe that's just gas (see the Putin thread)

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AbecedariusRex wrote:
Commissar Pupovich wrote:
Yet there is still a bit that worries me.... after all, I am a dog, and we dogs can sense things mere humans cannot.

Maybe that's just gas (see the Putin thread)

Hmmm, I am going to keep an eye on you....

<center><img src="https://people.delphiforums.com/a1sickpupe/keeping eye on you.gif"></center>

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CAIR says Serbian delegation blood 'unclean' and 'offensive' to Mooslem gunmen.

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Chairman! The Pup's fur is raised yet again! But at least I am alert that this could be a Bush plant. But just today, I was talking to my Iranian psychologist, who to my knowledge, is completely unaware of my true first love, and I was most clever in steering the conversation. She told me, with Lenin as my Witness, that the Muslims hate communists as much as they do Bush and the west! In fact, she went further in saying that that is why they joined with the west against the Motherland! Chairman, it was all I could do to keep my composure and not strangle this person right there! But there is more! Yes, I was wearing my vocal stress detector that I borrowed from the SMERSH library, and it detected no deception on her part when she made that statement! Now I do recognize, thanks to your wise stewardship of a poor commissar, that the Bushitler is exceedingly cunning, and she may be a plant... in fact, she doesn't even wear a burqa, but what if she is being truthful? She just returned from Iran just a few months ago, so she knows the mood there.

Oh, almost forgot! This informant/thought criminal even went so far as to tell me that "joke" about the war mongerer in Iraq telling the soon to be again First Daughter, that the only thing he feared was Usama, Obama, and Yo Momma! Now I ask, does this sound like one of our allies?

I am doing my best to keep your wise counsel in mind, it's just I am a born watchdog you know?

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Life imitates the People's Cube (unfortunately).

Robert Fisk of the Independent wrote:Outside Klina last week, I came across another blasted church, blown to pieces just two months ago. Its shattered dome lay over walls and crosses and iconstasis. And wandering amid the rubble was a Kosovo Albanian, Ymer Qupeva. What on earth was he doing here? I asked. Sympathising with the Serb worshippers? "I have come to view the professionalism of the destruction," Mr Qupeva said. "They did very well - they planted explosives against all four walls."

<img width="550" src="https://www.kosovo.net/slovinje4.jpg">

A church in Slovinje, 16th century, destroyed by Albanian extremists only 50 m from the
nearest British check point, July 1999


 
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