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A Detergent to Right a Wrong Perception

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Hi, the People's Anthony Sullivan here!

Everyone knows it's a struggle to think korrektly, no matter how hard we try. We here have been, apparently, sore offenders of “inkorrekt thinking” according to others, so all of you know what's up. It truly is tragic that nobody recognises, as demonstrated by our removal from Wikipedia, our attempted censorship putdowns on Facebook by said party, and now with even the D.O.D thinking that we are inkorrekt, that we not only strive for correct thinking, we INNOVATE new ways to korrekt thinking.

Today, we not only prove them wrong, we will shatter, to the finest dust, the misconception that we are inkorrekt; we will do it with a brand-new, mind-blowing product. To that end, we here at the Cube have been slaving away towards making such a thing. This product will, once, and for all, concretely prove our true stance towards korrekt thinking.

For years the kapitalist side of me was famous on tv for promoting the Oxi-Clean detergent for cleaning clothing stains, so now I bring you a new product. Introducing, The People's Oxi-Clean ideological detergent, the detergent that cleans your mind, developed by me, Red Square, and other Cube Leaders!

Just as I've always been on screen telling you how Oxi-Clean detergent is a powerful agent for clothing stain removal, and now I am here to tell you about how it is a powerful agent for removing thought-stains from your mind. The power of the People's Oxi-Clean will supercharge all thought cleansing processes, so your mind comes out good as blank, filled only with the most korrekt thoughts, and mindless obedience to everyone.

Before there was only brainwashing, as never before has there been an ideological thought cleansing soap, but now there is! All brainwashing sessions in existence thank this product because of how it not just puts the “washing” in brainwashing, it SUPERCHARGES it!

Just open your mind, add the ideology detergent to your thought cleansing, sit tight, and relax. You never worry about using too much, or too little, because the advanced, state-of-the-art People's Technology will not only let you pour only the right amount into your, or any offender's mind, it will thoroughly redistribute every single DROPLET to each part of the mind according to its needs; now that's advanced technology!

Every customer that buys it loves it because we said so because they just do! Don't believe us, look in the replies where satisfied members are responding with pictures of them/their known associates/other random people using this product to sheer satisfaction!

It normally would cost 1-5 kapitalist dollars, but we the Cube will subsidize all purchases, so it is now 0 kapitalist dollars; that's right, it is COMPLETELY FREE, so what are you waiting for? reach your local marketplace for state-approved products at 1-800-NOT-A-REAL-CONTACT-METHOD.COM today! don't hesitate to buy, get supercharged mind cleaning today!

Remember, thought purging is the true way to democracy, and it's not ideologically clean until it's ideologically Oxi-Clean (I couldn't resist the opportunity to make one last Oxi-Clean joke)!!!

-Xi Yao (or call me by my english name Peter if it's easier) Liao

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Welcome to the People's Cube, Comrade Sullivan!

We used to keep our brains free of harmful build-up with Uncle Ted's Brain Opener, but he took the secret ingredient to his grave.

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Red Square wrote:Welcome to the People's Cube, Comrade Sullivan!

We used to keep our brains free of harmful build-up with Uncle Ted's Brain Opener, but he took the secret ingredient to his grave.

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Red Square wrote:Sponsored products related to this item:

PeopleSpeak™ Mouth Detergent For People's Leaders™

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Ah, you know, the People's Oxi-Clean can be added with other mental detergents, like its kapitalist counterpart; in this case, any and all who boost the mouth detergent with the people's Oxi-Clean will make the most of it, namely a complete, and utter cleaning of the mind AND the mouth. At last, a match made in heaven, for a complete cleaning that will clean the mind that makes, and the mouth that says inkorrekt thoughts!

Not to mention the brain opener would've prevented the need for cleaning again in a long time, let alone ever; truly a pity that the formula's gone.

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So exciting! Shall we get a shot of Oxi-Clean in our kasha, when back from the beet fields?

Or, in honor of our new Komrade, a Mayakovsky poetry slam, I mean, at Tractor Barn #2?
Plus seasoned beet juice, procentually boosted with Oxi-Clean?
How about that, Komrade Ivan-350%-Norm?

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We also need an extra strength Cubist Eye Bleach. Johnson's just isn't working for me anymore. It's not strong enough these days.

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Another Cubist would have to invent the formula because 'biology, chemistry, math' is not my forte. We could grease some palms in the USPTO with some blat to get a patent. This shouldn't be too hard since they appear to already be operating in the Glorious World of Next Tuesday. After we get our patent we could start marketing and then sit back and watch the truckloads of beets pour in.

I can do the jingle for the commercials! Ok, let me pitch this to y'all....(clearing throat).......

I'm going to wash those lies right out of my eyes...
I'm going to wash those lies right out of my eyes...
I'm going to wash those lies right out of my eyes...
AND SEND THEM ON THEIR WAAAAAYYYYYYYYYYY!!!!!

Sung to the tune of...............


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Comrades, should it not read Oxi-Moron than Oxi-Clean

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Genosse Dummkopf wrote:.
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So exciting! Shall we get a shot of Oxi-Clean in our kasha, when back from the beet fields?

Or, in honor of our new Komrade, a Mayakovsky poetry slam, I mean, at Tractor Barn #2?
Plus seasoned beet juice, procentually boosted with Oxi-Clean?
How about that, Komrade Ivan-350%-Norm?

It will be dispensed at each one's convenience! Also, it will make for a truly Supercharged dose of beet juice

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Clara Illbustyourballs Zetkin wrote:We also need an extra strength Cubist Eye Bleach. Johnson's just isn't working for me anymore. It's not strong enough these days.

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Another Cubist would have to invent the formula because 'biology, chemistry, math' is not my forte. We could grease some palms in the USPTO with some blat to get a patent. This shouldn't be too hard since they appear to already be operating in the Glorious World of Next Tuesday. After we get our patent we could start marketing and then sit back and watch the truckloads of beets pour in.

I can do the jingle for the commercials! Ok, let me pitch this to y'all....(clearing throat).......

I'm going to wash those lies right out of my eyes...
I'm going to wash those lies right out of my eyes...
I'm going to wash those lies right out of my eyes...
AND SEND THEM ON THEIR WAAAAAYYYYYYYYYYY!!!!!

Sung to the tune of...............

Well, those things are (sort of) my forte... To be fair, this was originallly supposed to be a "The People's Chlorox Bleach" commercial, but then I remembered he is famouus for Oxi-Clean, not Chlorox.

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trashmouth wrote:Comrades, should it not read Oxi-Moron than Oxi-Clean
Fair enough

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Our friend and contributor Marion Dreyfus has sent us a poem recently, and I think it adds to the discussion:

This is not an oxymoron

Nah. It's kind of a bimbo, making
this more of a doxy-moron
Or it's an ill-conceived on Sunday brunch with your ex-
near Zabar's, so: Loxy-moron
Wearing a tres agee, muy tatty fur that's
seen, yeah, better days. It's a foxy-moron
Sadly, in the end, brought low by a tragic cough. caught from
a straphanger, what you'd likely call a poxy-moron
The sublime beau who's a bit ‘round the bend but hits
his daily rehab, a tough detoxi-moron
But you, girl, still got it, sorta, what it
takes, so call that a moxie-moron
And that, dear friends, is the glue that defines
soul--what we'll call an epoxy-moron

marion d s dreyfus . . . 17 january 20©18

​​​She hits the bullseye. Or is it the ox-eye? Depends on the bull.

The same way, one man's Oxi-Clean is another man's Bull-Clean.


 
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