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A New Triumph of In-Your-Face Progressivism

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Tonight I was slaving away at the People's Business, making sure that no dollar was left unsnatched, no penny left unpinched, no asset unentailed, no right granted without confiscation of a dozen more rights, with the television on. I only do it to support our brothers at MSNBC but I have to admit that it does try the patience when Keith says something which I consider very proggish and in the best of taste, that Bruno, who has a room-temperature IQ, starts laughing and shouting things like, “Oh, you stupid thing, Keith. Don't you know that if you spend more than you have, you get cut off? Happens to me all the time at Victoria's Secret.” And when Janeane Garofalo came on, he sniffed, “Now we know where all the old Oil of Olay goes to die.” And a few minutes later I heard him mutter, “What I could do with her and a bucket of naphtha."

The proletarian arm of Government Motors, Chevrolet, was not advertising its cars. After all, why should it? Like all proper industries, they can put an orange crate on a skate board, as long as it's built by the UAW, and that's fine because the taxpayers have bought it at least the first end, if they won't buy it at the other end.

So it is entirely mete that Government Motors tells us that with every Chevy we buy, on the other end of course, they're going to use the money that the taxpayers have paid, at the first end, you see, to invest in renewable energy and to plant trees.

How progressive of them. When Charlie Wilson, the president of General Motors, it was known then in B.O. years, said, “What's good for General Motors is good for America,” he was right on. He then went onto become a politician, which as we all know, is where the real clout is. Bill Gates trembles at Harry Reid. Or should. And it's too bad that Leland Stanford lived in times in which the enlightenment of Marx hadn't reached us. Just think. “If it's not nailed down, it's mine, and if I can get it, it wasn't nailed down,” was only the boast of a robber baron.

Now he could utterly control the health of 300,000,000 people, and their pocketbooks, and their freedoms, and he wouldn't have to even build a railroad to do it. Or even run a railroad. All he'd have to do is run a campaign and get a Nobel for being say not John D. Rockefeller just as Barry O got a Nobel for not being George Bush.
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Back to this brainwave of Government Motors. As we know, Dear O'Leader has managed to steal a huge amount of investor money from GM, and restructure things to give ultimate power to government. Or the union. Or both. Or is this some sort of spiritual duality? The dual godheads of progressivism. The holy duality managed to destroy the investor money, depriving people of their wealth and therefore transferring power from them directly to government.

This is inspired. This is right up next to Red Square's description of how the Mother Country conned the English mining engineers. Taking money from people who have earned it to give it to people who have political clout. This is is the Progressive Philosopher's Stone: we turn gold into bloody-minded greed and larceny. And what's not to love about that? I'm sure that we could all get an inspired lesson from Senator Bernie Sanders, who understands perfectly the idea of unfairness: anything that he doesn't like.

Pardon me, comrades, if I tend to ramble a bit. I have been dipping into some of Pinkie's Pilfered Putinka Vodka and have garnished it with a slice of burned potato peel (burned orange peel is so haute bourgeoisie.) And you know how Pinkie's Pilfered Putinka is—if you don't go blind, it's the best trip you'll find this side of mushrooms on cow shit.

Or finding some entitlement just for little old you in Dear O'Leadercare. I personally am just plotzing over the unknown subclause in a subparagraph in a subarticle promising to pay for the removal of bunions caused by drag queens with an Imelda Marcos fetish. This was put in, I boast to tell you, as compensation to Bruno from the time that our Many Titted Empress rode him around the Rancho de Rio Grande like a rented mule, or a middle-class taxpayer in California, yes, that bad, and I wept real, not prog tears, to see it. Even our MTE was abashed although I'm not sure if it was from remorse for what she did to Bruno or or because his blood spoiled the pedicure on her right hind hoof.

Ah. Back to the point. Sorry. I told you that Pinkie's Pilfered Putinka was good. And it is. And you know the best bit? If she finds me, I won't have to worry about waking up in the morning, because I won't have a head to reproach me.

All hail to Chevy. It's the trifecta. Rescue a once-great company which was, entirely in the most proggish way, turned over to the thieving, thuggish union bossesworkers, and with a management more concerned with Washington favors than a good product. So far, so good. And now steal wealth from investors and transfer it to people who have eaten up the wealth that was on hand with implacable progressive greed. And then use other people's money to plant trees.

Ah. I am, frankly, and this is in camera, sexually fulfilled by this, comrades.

This is one of the biggest slaps I've seen against the Kapitalist thugs of AmeriKKKa that I have ever seen, and for the sheer effrontery of passing theft as virtue it has no parallel.

All hail GM!

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Should we call this the IYFP factor? WWJD?
Jodin-WWJD.gif

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I don't really give a flitter wit about GM and their little vehicles but it is good that dear Leader and taken them over. Maybe now the Union peoples can make some real money and we'll have a vehicle that needs lots of Unions repair peoples to make more money. Why, I am thinking, this is sounding more and more like the wonderful USSR where all things were all equal.

Now about that Pinkie's Pilfered Putinka Vodka, I would be most happy to share a glass or 3 with you, loyal comrade.

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Comrade,

We have evolved way beyond

"A New Triumph of In-Your-Face Progressivism"

I propose a new title for your topic ...

"A New Triumph of In-Your-Face and in All Your Orifices Progressivism"

Have you not had a full body scan or "pat down" lately?

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RR, I had repressed the memory of that whining little chihuahua fucker neglected to honor the memory of the noble Jodin Morey. He of the cocked head. But in exculpation let me say that I have so internalized his regime of whining, self-righteousness, posturing, moaning, and denial of reality that I had forgotten his name. After all, a fish doesn't remember the water, does it?

Jodin is the perfect prog, and I thank you for reminding me.

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Fraulein, you have a standing invitation to the Rancho de Rio Grande for a glass of Pinkie's Pilfered Purloined Putinka vodka. I know that I'm being redundant with two words for "stolen" but then, hey, I'm a made prog and I have a right to throw around all the words the theft that I can, and just so you don't think that I'm asleep at the switch, I'm searching for new ways to steal.

For example I've been thinking about Barry O's campaign contributions. I saw a video of a Palestinian man who was raising money for him. And the campaign disabled all the fraud checking that they could. Now I have to admit, much as I admire our Many Titted Empress, she did return suspicious campaign contributions.

But not dear Barry O. He can swallow anything.

I wonder if he knew Linda Lovelace?

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Castrate, one of the overlooked quiddities of Obamacare is the In Your Orifices health care. There will be exchanges of course for insurance but there will also be exchanges for pulchritude. Since this is the day of the common man(tm), Obamacare will institute not only universal health care but universal sex care too.

The rich will pay more in taxes. But the comely will have to nail pigs.

This, dear Castrate, is true progressivism.

BTW, the smart money says it was inserted by Barbara Mikulski, who managed to make a nutcracker vomit.

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OMG. Any post by Theocritus, is like gold, dripping, and dripping, okay.

Theocritus wrote:"Back to this brainwave of Government Motors. As we know, Dear O'Leader has managed to steal a huge amount of investor money from GM, and restructure things to give ultimate power to government. Or the union. Or both. Or is this some sort of spiritual duality? The dual godheads of progressivism. The holy duality managed to destroy the investor money, depriving people of their wealth and therefore transferring power from them directly to government."


OMG, AGAIN! OF course the rest (meaning: the rest of our golden words were like a getting a massage from a masseuse in a Palm Springs Hotel - Don't you dare go there, on one of your capitalist escapades - you will be sorely disappointed).

I swoon, I revel, I dance in those words. I will be back to describe what exactly I was speaking of.

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And when Janeane Garofalo came on, he sniffed, “Now we know where all the old Oil of Olay goes to die.”

YYYYYEAAAAAAAWWHHHHH

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Commissar Theocritus wrote:RR, I had repressed the memory of that whining little chihuahua fucker neglected to honor the memory of the noble Jodin Morey. He of the cocked head. But in exculpation let me say that I have so internalized his regime of whining, self-righteousness, posturing, moaning, and denial of reality that I had forgotten his name. After all, a fish doesn't remember the water, does it?

Jodin is the perfect prog, and I thank you for reminding me.

You lying sack of shit! Oh, I see, well yes you are most welcome for the whining little chihuahua fucker reminder, and we shall not go into why... if it weren't for his damn hemorrhoids personal discomforts it would be easy to explain. However, I'm sure you will be fine with knowing that dear Jodin is extending his tally-whacker to calves in New Jersey doing just fine.

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Comrade Theocritus,

You weren't the only one dipping into Pinkie's vodka. But what better use for Pinkie's vodka than celebrating the metamorphosis of a capitalist for prophet company, into a people's subsidized worker's paradise?

This story you have told, is the story of the century. After nearly 100 years of making cars, the General Motors Company has reached a pinnacle of proggery never before seen in the history of this evil capitalist company. Every time I see the Chevron on a vehicle, or the GMC logo, from now on, I know I'll get a tree-gasm every time. And it's all for the union workers, and the trees, of course.

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Comrades, over the past twenty-four hours I have prostituted, er, been prostate, er, prostate, er, oh fuck it, upside-down supine, over the ingenuity of this Chevy move. I was so awed that when I woke this morning it was like Spud in Trainspotting waking in a bed after a night of drinking. He'd soiled himself, and the bed.

So it goes with unexampled proggishness. A truly good example of prog greed will put me out like 10 cc of Versed with a Fentonil chaser.

Alas and alack. Tomorrow I must return to the grind of flogging the proles.

It's so hard. But someone must do it.

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Ooh. Theocritus, remember when the name CHE-vy meant something? Oh, wait, of course today is better than yesterday, because back then, there was still greed, and union workers just weren't compensated enough for their work.

Happy flogging, tomorrow, prole flogger. And in the meantime, I hope your dreams are all CHE-vied up.

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Observing the Chinese military comrade about to shoot an unarmed civilian in from the rear at point blank range. How can this be called in your face when it is in the back of the head.
These sudden spins make me dizzy and confused.

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Leninka wrote:Ooh. Theocritus, remember when the name CHE-vy meant something? Oh, wait, of course today is better than yesterday, because back then, there was still greed, and union workers just weren't compensated enough for their work.

The new ad's are kinda catchy.

chevrolet-an-american-revolution.jpg



coal.jpg

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Comrade Alfie, I've heard that it takes 1.29 gallons of fossil fuel to make a gallon of corn ethanol and when you consider that a gallon of alcohol doesn't take you as far as a gallon of gasoline, the ratio is probably closer to 1.5 to 1. I bet it takes the equiv. of two gallons of fossil fuel (in the form of coal) to charge an electric car enough to go the same distance as a gallon of gas.

My point is that through inefficiency we will surely become energy independent and reduce pollution. That is the current truth and don't you forget it.

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But Comrade Whoopie, it's all for the Greater Good ™. Better the price of corn that feeds the masses go up than have any carbon dioxide in the air. I mean, of course, that's what plants thrive on, but that's not the point. It still makes the air dirty.

Comrade Alfie, your vision of the CHE-vy is CHE-lectric.

I

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Comrade Tooorisky wrote:How can this be called in your face when it is in the back of the head
That is not in the soon-to-be-unperson Chinese prole. Of course it wasn't in his face; especially since he wouldn't be being executed if he had eyes in the back of his head.

This is in the face of the family who gets to watch it, and in the face of his estate, which is billed for the bullets.

Did you know that they do that? And Jolly Danny Ortega did that too.

But then under Obamacare we'll all be billed for the endless bureaucrats who eat up our health care telling us what health care we cannot have, because they've eaten up all the money for it.

How proggish is that? Gives me a rush of blood amidships.

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Leninka, have you had a fight with Miss Resentment? You are no longer evincing her DNA.

I do quite like your new vocabulary. Let's see. When someone is made into an un-person, is he CHE-lated? And of course if we, as Made Progs, don't do what we said we'd do, then all we're doing is CHE-ating. So that's all right then, isn't it?

Then there's CHEse Manhattan Bank. Do you think that would be more successful run by a murdering communist, i.e., a great fellow, than David Rockefeller?

Think before you answer on this one. Bear in mind that Chase lent billions in the 70s and 80s to Latin America, where from 70% to 96% of it was stolen by the rich, and deposited back with Chase Manhattan

And David is the smart one. This proves it. His very proggish brother is the senior senator from West Virginia.

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I told you ALL there was a New Paradigm! None of this willying about will stop the New Paradigm from taking hold, but of course it was joke... we knew it was joke... just like when my 12 year old lies through it's teeth and then says it was a joke... I mean you do know it was a joke right?

What is this thread about? I need to go pick up my talking points bulletin at think progress, enjoy your Biscotti comrades!

Oh looky, a fly just landed on my computer screen...

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RR, I thought that you of all people would be agog--which is a picture considering that you have a beak; not seen since Daffy Duck--over this new proggish way to steal and insult and patronize at the same time. And defraud investors. All at the same time.

Really, this is a new low in human behavior. Which means it's a high-water mark for us, and perhaps the highest we will have until all of humanity is grinding in slavery and poverty with our feet on their throats.

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Just so you keep up the spirit, all this bit about slavery and poverty is the reason that we are doing things, and keep that in mind. Because it's about equality for everyone.

Equal misery. Except for those of us who need a custom 757 or Rancho de Rio Grande or a few Hummels.

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Commissar Theo,

Your explanation was most equal. The exit wound would definately be " in your face" or forehead, whichever is more accurate.

It would also be equal to include dry cleaning expenses with the cost of the bullets.

Comrades involved with the "holding" position cannot possibly avoid blood spatter at that range.

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Tooorisky, I do take your point about the dry-cleaning costs. But I have solved that problem at the Rancho. When I only need to execute one or two proles, I merely eat the dry-cleaning costs myself. Bullets are always billed to the deceased's estate but dry-cleaning? What do you think I am, a heartless capitalist? When I kill someone I refuse to make his estate pay for the laundry of my goons' uniforms. That's just unSandinista.

But when I have wholesale re-education to do, and this is the sort of re-education which always is finished with a failing grade, I merely employ the Commissar Theocritus School of Wet Work and Community Organizaion. This, in conjunction with Red Star's goons, is the Wal-Mart of re-education.

Large rooms, drains in the center, sluice gates. Who do you think taught Saddam Hussein to make his PeopleMatic Choppers unloading body parts directly into dump trucks? I did, that's who. He didn't have the imagination for that. It takes a made prog to have that imagination and he was only a thug.

He had no art in his blood. Whereas I do. That's how I came up with the PeopleMatic Choppers as part of the Commissar Theocritus School of Wet Work and Community Organization.

With the proper use of Tyvek and Lexan, there is no dry cleaning to incur, and nothing which cannot be remedied by naphtha.

I think that I shall have to franchise the school. More anon.

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Ahh, I see that Comrade Alfie has stumbled on my new sales pitch for GM....hope everyone likes it. I've been very busy this year and now for a glimpse of my latest endeavor:

https://www.theblaze.com/stories/lib-ma ... us-heroes/

I'm sure all will want to stock up for the Winter Solstice Holidays, Si? Like the fact that I tied the ad campaign to the saving of a Liberal Rag Magazine as well. ( I'll just take my bows now, and lots of cash as well......walks away whistling a revolutionary ditty)

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Here's the new pitch for GM: "Buy a Chevy. We'll plant trees if you do. We'll plant you if you don't."

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Commissar Theocritus wrote:Leninka, have you had a fight with Miss Resentment? You are no longer evincing her DNA.

I do quite like your new vocabulary. Let's see. When someone is made into an un-person, is he CHE-lated? And of course if we, as Made Progs, don't do what we said we'd do, then all we're doing is CHE-ating. So that's all right then, isn't it?

Then there's CHEse Manhattan Bank. Do you think that would be more successful run by a murdering communist, i.e., a great fellow, than David Rockefeller?

Think before you answer on this one. Bear in mind that Chase lent billions in the 70s and 80s to Latin America, where from 70% to 96% of it was stolen by the rich, and deposited back with Chase Manhattan

And David is the smart one. This proves it. His very proggish brother is the senior senator from West Virginia.

Miss who? I don't miss anyone. Well, except Bubba, the first black president. You always remember your first one.

CHE-batta bread, CHE-nook of the North, CHE-uckwagon beef, CHE-thonian, CHE-charrones, CHE-ching.

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A clarification on CHE-thonian: A messy gob of dead commie revolutionary body parts rotting in the Bolivian countryside.

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Commissar Theocritus School of Wet Work and Community Organization? Do you have to apply for government subsidies? Or are you just given large chunks of money by some voracious ex-Joo billionaire megalomaniac?

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Uh, ex-Joo. Is that George Soros? Sorry, I don't know.

I am just thinking of the school and am fleshing out the curriculum. The main thing is should it be Commissar Theocritus' School of Wet Work and Community Organizing or Commissar Theocritus' School of Community Organizing and Wet Work?

Which leads to the other? Before you answer, recall that in the big Crayola boxes, it was the first color which mattered. Just as it's the first thing, say African-American, or Cuban-American or gay-American, that matters to a prog.

Isn't it?

Since we all know that Community Organizing is festering resentments which percolate until there is need for Wet Work, it only makes sense to have Wet Work follow Community Organization because Progish, the language of fuck-you-forever, is has pre-positive adjectives, owing entirely to the fact that George Soros, that darling, now speaks English.All this worrying about what is proggier than thou has left me quite weak. I think that I need to have a restorative week in Cozumel. I'm quite sure that they haven't cleaned up Cancun yet after that glitterati trash was there.


 
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