Even better than the Democratic Party's idea of all voting by telephone is the ACLU's all internet voting. Cast your votes today!

Just click the picture below and you'll go to the ACLU Virtual Voting Booth. Speak truth to power!

Weird. I tried voting, and when I clicked on Republikkkans I got error messages explaining why I can't vote for them - which is great news, and this is how it should be. But when I clicked on the Democrat candidates - even Comrade Hillary - I got the same error message. Must be some evil Republikkkan foul play. Just wait, we'll get to the bottom of this!

Well, I wish they would've waited a bit longer to reveal why we want universal free internet access to be considered a right. American leftists... their hearts are in the right place but sometimes, sheesh, talk about arrogant boneheads. Classic "put the cart before the horse".

OK, once more for review.
ADMIT TO NOTHING!
Assume control through any means neccessary.
Seize all wealth, private property and corporate infrastructure.
Eliminate dissidents and useful idiots.
Implement sweeping, radical new "reform" programs in 5 year increments.
Revise history to reinterpret the above events.

Honestly, there are days when I think we would just be better not to trust our revolutionary goals to these buffons and just do it ourselves.

And on a lighter note... that is the most flattering picture I've seen of alGore in YEARS! The last time I remember him looking like that was when he was the keynote speaker at my high school graduation 20 years ago. LOL

Well, it didn't let me vote either. I feel totally oppressed and disenfranchised now. It said that I didn't understand English and the ballot didn't come in Spanish, the only language I clearly speak and understand as an Amerikan. I fell for the fliers posted around my collective informing that the voting will be held elsewhere (I assumed Burger King and went there, waited 10 hours for the voting to begin, it never did) as opposed to my usual polling station because I'm stupid. My district line was moved an inch past my dacha, so the polling station I usually attend was *gasp* not the right one, so I gave up and didn't bother to find the correct one because I'm stupid. To top it all off, I was giving a punch-card ballot when I finally found the right polling place, at first they said they were closed because it was like 9:00 in the PM and results were pouring in then, but I yelled racism (even though I'm a whitey) and they let me in, well I punched it and had a hanging chad because I am stupid. Well, the official there let me use the touch screen, and by mistake my finger slipped and I hit the wrong candidate thinking it was Her Excellency, so then they gave me a provisional ballot, and we all know they don't count those. So after all that, I didn't get to vote and that is wrong, and I'm stupid.

I will challenge the results, so help me, Her Excellency will win...

I'm still at the Burger King and they are voting but Jon Kerri is not on the ballot and If Hill-er-ree is going to win then Jon should at least be vice or something right....wait someone said that was at the wrong Burger King...I hav Mi Shiert Ohn That Sayz Doos Not Play Well Wif ooohhthers DPRK Ha ....

Finally got through to the poll workers at the ACLU. They assured me that all our votes have been properly cast and tabulated. They thank everyone for voting for Hillary. She's getting 99.99% of the vote!

I was really lucky that there was a polling place inside the Che-Mart by my collective. I was allowed to vote early and often! When asked if I had an i.d. I said no I don't I am Private Pravda Hero of the People and they just let me keep voting as long as it was for Her Excellency they didn't care

What exactly is the issue of non-English ballot?

- Voting is for citizens only.
- To become a citizen you must pass a test in English.
- Therefore, all legitimate voters are supposed to speak English by default.
- If you can't speak English, you're probably a not a citizen.
- Voting is for citizens only.

So what exactly is the issue of non-English ballot? That's right. The issue is not the issue, revolution is the issue!

Some additional factors to consider: If you can't understand English, you can't really form a qualified opinion about whatever you're voting for. So you vote for whatever the Party told you to vote, through a specially appointed Media Kommissar in charge of Ethnic Relations.

How many visitors from other countries do you think there will be around polling places in November? Democrats must demand ballots in all Earth languages - or declare the election invalid.

Sometimes I wonder how they ever managed to run this country in the Age Before Political Correctness? As my friend Kathysays, it was all, like, so totally unprogressive!

Will it be cionsidered a voter fraud if we set a mock voting booth at Buirger King (or maybe Starbucks) and urge all progressives and non-English speakers to cast their revolutionary vote there?

Red Square wrote:Will it be cionsidered a voter fraud if we set a mock voting booth at Buirger King (or maybe Starbucks) and urge all progressives and non-English speakers to cast their revolutionary vote there?

Absolutely not, comrade Red Square. It is a marvelous idea, so next time I am misled by these illustrious "flyers” and begin my journey to another venue that is not a polling station, I will be able to exercise my right to suffrage there. Let us not forget the animals/plants/dead/oatmeal's and appliances that need transportation to these polls. We must provide them with adequate tax funded buses to move them from their present locations to the venue of voting to ensure that EVERY vote is counted.

Red Square wrote:Will it be cionsidered a voter fraud if we set a mock voting booth at Buirger King (or maybe Starbucks) and urge all progressives and non-English speakers to cast their revolutionary vote there?

Comrade...how could it be fraud?

That's the Amerikan way!

Private Pravda wrote:
Comrade...how could it be fraud?

That's the Amerikan way!

Let us not forget, comrades, that WE are not capable of comitting any so-called "voter fraud". Only RepugliKKKans do that. It's too bad that fewer states require you to register as a member of a particular party since the easiest way to end voter fraud would be to simply purge the voter roles of anyone registered "Republican" or "Libertarian". Perhaps we can make that a part of the Ominbus National Hate Crime Laws bill that Glorious Beloved Leader HRC plans to sign during her first 100 days in office.

I'm still in favor of the "all votes by telephone" idea. The telephone has been around for over a hundred years. It's a proven technology. Quite reliable. This internet stuff is way beyond a lot of our constituency. I hear some people are even having trouble casting ballots at the ACLU's website.

Yes, I like the telephone idea too. But some in our base are a little, hmm, how do I say this while still maintaining political correctness. Well, they are telephonically impaired, they have a hard time pushing the buttons and understanding the multi-step process of making a phone call. We could have a Commissar stand with them for needed assistance but that would only cost the Party millions in soft ca$h. How could we solve this pressing dillema??

I thought of one solution. Heres the plan. We just tell the FEC that a billion registered voters called into our HQ confused on what to do and that they are all voting for the Party. If they call us a bunch of liars trying to steal the election again, we just slip them a twenty or something and hope for the best. OR, we just scream DIEBOLD! DIEBOLD! at the top of our lungs...

Like it or not, there are always problems. Perhaps everyone should vote at Burger King and Starbucks and then if things don't go our way we'll sue on the basis of "dis-enfranchisement."

Chairman Meow S. Pun wrote:Yes, I like the telephone idea too. But some in our base are a little, hmm, how do I say this while still maintaining political correctness. Well, they are telephonically impaired, they have a hard time pushing the buttons and understanding the multi-step process of making a phone call. We could have a Commissar stand with them for needed assistance but that would only cost the Party millions in soft ca$h. How could we solve this pressing dillema??

Duh! "Marque dos par Espanol"

Not sure if my National Language is correct (forgive me please!)...Totally automated, comrade!

Comrade Otis wrote:Like it or not, there are always problems. Perhaps everyone should vote at Burger King and Starbucks and then if things don't go our way we'll sue on the basis of "dis-enfranchisement."

Don't forget Che-Mart; everyone knows where a Che-Mart is!

Che Mart is good. If Young Cosmo Pioneers selling Che Gourmet fine food products knock on your door they too will accept and tabulate your vote.

It works, I voted for myself five times, even though I'm disabled, I was challenged by a party offical, my boss wouldn't let me take time off from work, I didn't have identification, and I pressed "one" for English.
Besides, who was it that said "It doesn't matter who votes, only who counts the votes."?

Hillary

Chairman Meow S. Pun wrote:Yes, I like the telephone idea too. But some in our base are a little, hmm, how do I say this while still maintaining political correctness. Well, they are telephonically impaired, they have a hard time pushing the buttons and understanding the multi-step process of making a phone call. We could have a Commissar stand with them for needed assistance but that would only cost the Party millions in soft ca$h. How could we solve this pressing dillema??

Comrade, I think I might have a solution. Since we have a little time until the glorious election where we shall crush the opposition, I think it might be feasible to divide areas up geographically, and recruit 'Voter Assistants'. these 'Voter Assistants' will of course go through rigorous Party Approved training in special 'Vote Training Centers'. Then come election day, our 'Voter Assistants' will go door to door and help everyone vote over the phone. Thus we are assured that none of the RepubliKKKans will be able to taint their votes. For we all know that everyone wants to vote for the glorious Party approved candidates!

Hey I am currently stationed at a 'Vote Training Center' in Secret northern Russian location I will gladly Volunteer to go door to door... I will even shave my 2 year old beard off and change my underwear!! Wait on second thought....I won't have to go to any amusement parks where they have rides close to porta-potts and dumpsters with old sea food in them will I???

General Ivan (Ret.),

Yes, you will have to go in a prole-o-potty and be forced to roll around in dumpters full of sea food, dirty diapers and used tampons. There, you will find Prof. Kurgmans fav. stoodent Kathy. You will then be forced (at gun point) to walk up to registered Republikkkan houses and talk to them about how the Republikkkans threw sea food, dirty diapers and used tampons in your face and then brutally beat you half to death. You will then force your way into their home and make a bowel movement on their living room floor to show them the Party means business, then raid the fridge and pass out on their dining room table, be sure to drink large amounts of water before passing out, we expect you to urinate while sleeping just to add a bit of flare. This whole production is part of our 72 Hour Plan to Revolutionary Victory and will be done across the nation........ Good Luck Gen. Ivan (Ret.)! Stalins Speed my Comrade!

General Ivan wrote:Hey I am currently stationed at a 'Vote Training Center' in Secret northern Russian location I will gladly Volunteer to go door to door... I will even shave my 2 year old beard off and change my underwear!! Wait on second thought....I won't have to go to any amusement parks where they have rides close to porta-potts and dumpsters with old sea food in them will I???

haha! If it were up to me (and I think I can arrange this through Executive Order!) I'd have you bobbing for turds in those port-o-cans General!!! HAHAHAHA!!!!!

Geez I crack myself up sometimes!!!

George W. Bush wrote:haha! If it were up to me (and I think I can arrange this through Executive Order!) I'd have you bobbing for turds in those port-o-cans General!!! HAHAHAHA!!!!!

Geez I crack myself up sometimes!!!

Don't feed this troll!

I fed it Now it wont go back to its home!

Chairman Meow S. Pun wrote:I fed it Now it wont go back to its home!

Poke it with a sharp stick, that should get rid of it!

A article in today's Seattle Post-Intelligencer gives a boost to the ACLU's Vote by Internet idea:

Link to: Wash loves vote-by-mail; is online voting next?

Wash loves vote-by-mail; is online voting next? [color=silver]Seattle PI Oct 21, 2006[/color] wrote:Reed, who helped push it through the Legislature while he was still Thurston County auditor, says the ease of absentee voting is the single best thing Olympia has done to boost voter participation.
The next logical question: When can we vote online?

Election software and ballot security experts at Washington's homegrown election tech company, the Bellevue-based VoteHere, say the technology is already here, but that voters and their elected leaders have to get comfortable with the idea.

Reed agrees that Internet voting is on the horizon.

"It makes sense. It's the next logical step," he says.