Contest: spot the micro-aggression

5/3/2015, 10:29 pm

Nobel Peace Prize nomination for anyone who can find 50, or more , micro-aggressions in this post.

(Denouncement and re-education for anyone who can't find 49 or more micro-agressions in this post)

Comrades, as you all know, The Party™ is eternally seeking out that which is offensive in order to eliminate offense from all aspects of life.

See if you can find 50 or more micro-aggressions in this post.

Remember, micro-aggressions don't have to be explicitly stated and usually are hidden or unstated.

One merely needs to be offended by a perceived assault for a micro-aggression to exist.

Everyone knows what must be done!

5/3/2015, 11:45 pm

I just now noticed that [color=#C0392B]Kapitan Kangaroo Kourt[/color] wrote:Nobel Peace Prize [highlight=#ffff00]nomination[/highlight] for anyone who can find 50, or more , micro-aggressions in this post.

I wanted the Nobel Peace Prize just like Dear Leader™ (PBUH)!
.

5/3/2015, 11:59 pm

Comrade Putout, you have turned the struggle against offense and oppression into a form of art. At the very least, you deserve a medal, or a smiley face, or something of that nature.

5/4/2015, 1:41 am

Kapitan Kangaroo Kourt wrote:Remember, micro-aggressions don't have to be explicitly stated and usually are hidden or unstated.

I did not find 3,249 micro-aggressions which were all hidden.

Per Bill the Cat: THWPPPPPT!

5/4/2015, 10:18 am

The black letters of the alphabet are surrounded by the predominantly white area of the computer screen, indicating the micro-aggressive desire for white supremacy and re-segregation of blacks from whites.

5/4/2015, 12:11 pm

I am having found at least 50. What!? You are saying that you are not believing me? Very well, comrade. There will being a knock on your door and it is being kicked in by my business associates. I am looking forward to be having the pleasure of your company in my questioning room...which is soundproof and easy to clean. And has many tools in it.

5/4/2015, 12:20 pm

Lev Termen wrote:
Kapitan Kangaroo Kourt wrote:Remember, micro-aggressions don't have to be explicitly stated and usually are hidden or unstated.

I did not find 3,249 micro-aggressions which were all hidden.

Per Bill the Cat: THWPPPPPT!

It's so simple dear kamrade. Open this page fifty times and become offended each time. The micro-aggressions are exposed by mere offense. Then you too can join the likes Our Glorious Dear Leader the Oval Office Urkel, Quisling in Chief and kamrades Algore and Arafat by being nominated for the Peace Prize...

5/4/2015, 12:45 pm

Kapitan Kangaroo Kourt wrote: Comrades, as you all know...

Everyone knows what must be done!

I denounce your micro-aggressive allegation that I and any 49 of my comrades KNOWS anything!

Around here, we do as we told, and we don't have to think or know anything because the Government does that for us.

5/4/2015, 3:06 pm

Our kollektive speaks with one voice. If you offended 50 of us, that's 50 micro-aggressions right there.

As Prophet Mohammed (PBUH) famously said:

"Whosoever committeth a micro-aggression on one human being, it shall be as if he had committed a micro-aggression on all mankind."

Thus onemicro-aggression automatically expands to at least several giga-aggressions, and that's if you don't count the animal kingdom, which is getting increasingly equal to humankind.

5/4/2015, 10:33 pm

Ivan the Stakhanovets wrote:
Kapitan Kangaroo Kourt wrote: Comrades, as you all know...

Everyone knows what must be done!

I denounce your micro-aggressive allegation that I and any 49 of my comrades KNOWS anything!

Around here, we do as we told, and we don't have to think or know anything because the Government does that for us.

ENOUGH OF YOUR COUNTER REVOLUTIONARY PHILOSOPHIES!!!!!!!!

WHEN THE COLLECTIVE TELLS YOU THAT YOU KNOW SOMETHING, YOU KNOW IT!!!!!

YOU ARE DENOUNCED, STAKHANOVETS!!!!!!!!!!!

I feel so defiled.

5/5/2015, 3:47 am

One morning I woke up to the deafening hum of 50 baby hummingbirds flocking outside my window. Their noise pollution really ticked me off. Do I get the prize? I mean, I have assumed everything here. I assume there were 50 because there were a lot! They were babies, therefore micro. What more do you need?

Oh, and they were very aggressive with their aggressive humming, which, by the way, woke me! Yeah, that's the ticket!

So, where's my prize?

5/5/2015, 2:44 pm

Pamalinsky wrote:So, where's my prize?

Dear Komrade Pamalinsky, Despite the fact that our Glorious Dear Leader was presented a Nobel Peace Prize for merely breathing, it is still a competitive prize. This put you in the running as a nominee but until the prize committee is replaced with a T-ball Kollektive, there can be only one winner. George Orwell infamously let the cat out of the bag: "Some animals are more equal than others." Tovarisch Komrade Pamalinsky!

5/5/2015, 3:20 pm

Kapitan Kangaroo Kourt wrote:
Ivan the Stakhanovets wrote:
Kapitan Kangaroo Kourt wrote: Comrades, as you all know...

Everyone knows what must be done!

I denounce your micro-aggressive allegation that I and any 49 of my comrades KNOWS anything!

Around here, we do as we told, and we don't have to think or know anything because the Government does that for us.

ENOUGH OF YOUR COUNTER REVOLUTIONARY PHILOSOPHIES!!!!!!!!

WHEN THE COLLECTIVE TELLS YOU THAT YOU KNOW SOMETHING, YOU KNOW IT!!!!!

YOU ARE DENOUNCED, STAKHANOVETS!!!!!!!!!!!

I feel so defiled.

Dear kamrade Kapitan, I have noticed that the shadow cast by the puny counter revolutionary is much too large. To "Cast a Giant Shadow" gives the individual too much power over The State. Tovarisch kamrade!

5/5/2015, 3:30 pm

Not only do I count 56 micro-aggressions, I also counted 153 nano-aggressions, and 327 pica-aggressions; this is in addition to the 3 deca-aggressions in the comments. And if you can't see them, that's just proof of YOUR white-cis-male-hetero-employed-ableist-sizeist-heightist-saneist privilege.
Furthermore, I denounce Comrade Putout for only using the capitalist-imperialist system of measuring aggression, and not properly using the People's Metric System of Aggression. ™

5/5/2015, 9:33 pm

Kommissar Uberdave wrote:
Pamalinsky wrote:So, where's my prize?
Dear Komrade Pamalinsky, Despite the fact that our Glorious Dear Leader was presented a Nobel Peace Prize for merely breathing, it is still a competitive prize. This put you in the running as a nominee but until the prize committee is replaced with a T-ball Kollektive, there can be only one winner. [highlight=#ffff99]George Orwell infamously let the cat out of the bag: "Some animals are more equal than others.[/highlight]" Tovarisch Komrade Pamalinsky!

Dear Tovarisch Commissar Uberdave,

Hey! We're not talking about cats here! We're talking about hummingbirds! Big difference! One is eensie-teensie and one is well, er, um, small. I win!

5/5/2015, 9:46 pm

Red Square wrote:and that's if you don't count the animal kingdom, which is getting increasingly equal to humankind.

What exactly is your point, Comrade Red Square? I'm sure there are many members of the collective, myself included, who are very interested in hearing you elaborate on your apparent disdain for the equal recognition of the "animal kingdom".

5/5/2015, 10:17 pm

Andrey Vyshinsky wrote:Not only do I count 56 micro-aggressions, I also counted 153 nano-aggressions, and 327 pica-aggressions; this is in addition to the 3 deca-aggressions in the comments. And if you can't see them, that's just proof of YOUR white-cis-male-hetero-employed-ableist-sizeist-heightist-saneist privilege.
Furthermore, I denounce Comrade Putout for only using the capitalist-imperialist system of measuring aggression, and not properly using the People's Metric System of Aggression. ™

With all due respect, Tovarich Andrey Vyshinsky,

I feel you are being a bit nit-picky here, what with all your specific factual measurements, and all. While I admire your attempt to assign blame to white-cis-male-hetero-employed-ableist-sizeist-heightist-saneist privileged dudes, this can go well beyond the comprehension of most progs.

However, it is a good effort and quite useful to those progs who like to pretend to know something they really don't know. They can just read it off of cue cards and feel very intelligent, knowing they are “doing the right thing” because “idealogy.”

Therefore, I must denounce you for denouncing our dear Comradette Putout. She, after all, gave us her best effort. I'm confident she will cut and paste what you have so diligently written and proceed from there. Sometimes we have to cut our fellow progs some slack. Know what I mean?

5/5/2015, 11:16 pm

Pamalinsky wrote:
Kommissar Uberdave wrote:
Pamalinsky wrote:So, where's my prize?
Dear Komrade Pamalinsky, Despite the fact that our Glorious Dear Leader was presented a Nobel Peace Prize for merely breathing, it is still a competitive prize. This put you in the running as a nominee but until the prize committee is replaced with a T-ball Kollektive, there can be only one winner. [highlight=#ffff99]George Orwell infamously let the cat out of the bag: "Some animals are more equal than others.[/highlight]" Tovarisch Komrade Pamalinsky!
Dear Tovarisch Commissar Uberdave,

Hey! We're not talking about cats here! We're talking about hummingbirds! Big difference! One is eensie-teensie and one is well, er, um, small. I win!

Did not! I did! So there! (one might note that cats don't have owners, they have staff. name the hummingbird that can make that claim)Tovarisch Komrade Pamalinsky!

5/5/2015, 11:37 pm

Aw Jeez, Kommissar Uberdave,

Everyone knows cats have staff. I, personally, have been the CEO for a couple of cats who have chosen to take me in. They turned out to be wonderful friends.

No, hummingbirds cannot make that claim. Why? Because they're eeeensier than cats.

This contest is about micro-aggression. Therefore, size matters!

Which one is smaller, a cat or a hummingbird? Hint: It hums.

I win!

5/6/2015, 1:17 am

Once again [color=#C0392B]Andrey Vyshinsky[/color] has tried to denounce me when he wrote:
Furthermore, I denounce Comrade Putout for only using the capitalist-imperialist system of measuring aggression, and not properly using the People's Metric System of Aggression. ™

.
Are those Hillary Clinton 'I bumped my head!' glasses?
.
We tangled before and I am still here so...
.

5/7/2015, 11:42 am

Pamalinsky wrote:Aw Jeez, Kommissar Uberdave,

Everyone knows cats have staff. I, personally, have been the CEO for a couple of cats who have chosen to take me in. They turned out to be wonderful friends.

No, hummingbirds cannot make that claim. Why? Because they're eeeensier than cats.

This contest is about micro-aggression. Therefore, size matters!

Which one is smaller, a cat or a hummingbird? Hint: It hums.

I win!

Karmrade Pamalinsky! Are you not aware that micro-aggressions add up to become a macro-aggression and can lead to the ultimate ill feeling of being Butt-Hurt™? Since it is the normal condition of all left leaning Americans to be angry and upset over the slightest thing, sending one to the Butt-Hurt™ zone could be fatal! It is imperative that you cease your anti-egalitarian insistence on winning at once! Your hummingbirds are flying in a gaggle! Tovarisch Kamrade Pamalinsky. (Note to Dear Kamrade Pamalinsky: I too am on the staff of three cat food processors)

5/7/2015, 12:14 pm

Comrade Putout wrote:
Once again [color=#C0392B]Andrey Vyshinsky[/color] has tried to denounce me when he wrote:
Furthermore, I denounce Comrade Putout for only using the capitalist-imperialist system of measuring aggression, and not properly using the People's Metric System of Aggression. ™
.
Are those Hillary Clinton 'I bumped my head!' glasses?
.
We tangled before and I am still here so...
.

andrey-vyshinsky-denounced-me-before.jpg

Dear Kamrade Putout, they may very well be Hairy Reid "Las Vegas casino owners sent a guy nick-named Treadmill to adjust my attitude" glasses too. Tovarisch Kamrade Putout!

5/7/2015, 3:43 pm

Kommissar Uberdave wrote:
Pamalinsky wrote:Aw Jeez, Kommissar Uberdave,

Everyone knows cats have staff. I, personally, have been the CEO for a couple of cats who have chosen to take me in. They turned out to be wonderful friends.

No, hummingbirds cannot make that claim. Why? Because they're eeeensier than cats.

This contest is about micro-aggression. Therefore, size matters!

Which one is smaller, a cat or a hummingbird? Hint: It hums.

I win!
Karmrade Pamalinsky! [highlight=#ffff00]Are you not aware that micro-aggressions add up to become a macro-aggression and can lead to the ultimate ill feeling of being Butt-Hurt™? Since it is the normal condition of all left leaning Americans to be angry and upset over the slightest thing, sending one to the Butt-Hurt™ zone could be fatal! It is imperative that you cease your anti-egalitarian insistence on winning at once! Your hummingbirds are flying in a gaggle![/highlight] Tovarisch Kamrade Pamalinsky. (Note to Dear Kamrade Pamalinsky: I too am on the staff of three cat food processors)

Ha! Kommissar Uber Dave,

I'll bet you thought you “got” me with the “gaggle” thing, huh?

Observe the following:

Average weight of a domestic cat: 10-15 lbs.

Average weight of a hummingbird: 2-20 grams.

how many grams in a pound

As you can clearly see, 1 pound equals 453.59237 grams.

Let's do the math.

453.59237 grams x 10= 4535.9237 grams (average cat)

One gram 435.59 x 2 = 871.10 grams (average hummingbird)

871.10 x 50 = 43,555. grams (average hummingbird)

QED: 4535 - 4355 = 180.

O.K. That was really close, but I still win!

I'm sure you know, Tovarich Commissar Uber Dave, that winning is everything! Especially for progs!

You are being disingenuous by saying it is not. You know it, I know it. Fess up!

; • )

5/7/2015, 10:50 pm

Pamalinsky wrote:
Kommissar Uberdave wrote:
Pamalinsky wrote:Aw Jeez, Kommissar Uberdave,

Everyone knows cats have staff. I, personally, have been the CEO for a couple of cats who have chosen to take me in. They turned out to be wonderful friends.

No, hummingbirds cannot make that claim. Why? Because they're eeeensier than cats.

This contest is about micro-aggression. Therefore, size matters!

Which one is smaller, a cat or a hummingbird? Hint: It hums.

I win!
Karmrade Pamalinsky! [highlight=#ffff00]Are you not aware that micro-aggressions add up to become a macro-aggression and can lead to the ultimate ill feeling of being Butt-Hurt™? Since it is the normal condition of all left leaning Americans to be angry and upset over the slightest thing, sending one to the Butt-Hurt™ zone could be fatal! It is imperative that you cease your anti-egalitarian insistence on winning at once! Your hummingbirds are flying in a gaggle![/highlight] Tovarisch Kamrade Pamalinsky. (Note to Dear Kamrade Pamalinsky: I too am on the staff of three cat food processors)
Ha! Kommissar Uber Dave,

I'll bet you thought you “got” me with the “gaggle” thing, huh?

Observe the following:

Average weight of a domestic cat: 10-15 lbs.

Average weight of a hummingbird: 2-20 grams.

how many grams in a pound

As you can clearly see, 1 pound equals 453.59237 grams.

Let's do the math.

453.59237 grams x 10= 4535.9237 grams (average cat)

One gram 435.59 x 2 = 871.10 grams (average hummingbird)

871.10 x 50 = 43,555. grams (average hummingbird)

QED: 4535 - 4355 = 180.

O.K. That was really close, but I still win!

I'm sure you know, Tovarich Commissar Uber Dave, that winning is everything! Especially for progs!

You are being disingenuous by saying it is not. You know it, I know it. Fess up!

; • )

Dear Kamrade Pamalinsky, you should be fully aware that winning isn't everything! (especially if you are not the winner)

…The concept of winning by declaration is only useful to the party, not the proletariat since they are to be made equal by the liberals victories. (that said, I remainButt-Hurt™ over your insistence on being the winner, "some animals are more equal than others" notwithstanding)

Tovarisch Kamrad Pamalinsky!

5/7/2015, 10:55 pm

I give up. What (or who) is Tovarich?

5/9/2015, 2:35 am

Konservative_Punk wrote:I give up. What (or who) is Tovarich?

Tovarich is Russian for "Comrade."

5/9/2015, 2:44 am

Wow, Kommissar Uberdave,

You really had me goin' on that last one! I almost gave up!

I really enjoyed our exchange and thank you so much for playing with me!

I hope this makes your butt feel better. ; • )

5/9/2015, 12:38 pm

Pamalinsky wrote:Wow, Kommissar Uberdave,

You really had me goin' on that last one! I almost gave up!

I really enjoyed our exchange and thank you so much for playing with me!

I hope this makes your butt feel better. ; • )

[img]images/clipart/Prog_Off.gif[/img] I had fun too, Pamalinsky, although trying to play the part of the leftist party 'bot can be work.

On the note of "Tovarisch", I kind'a discovered the word by stumbling upon the movie "Comrade X" on TCM. Comrade X was filmed to get more mileage out of the film "Ninotchka" which is better but both are fun flicks that skewer the communists. I looked up the word once through google and found a reference to it being a form of greeting but a recent search failed to find that one so I may be being redundant by using it as I have here. One thing is that some sites point to it being a little more than just comrade but more of a "good Soviet comrade" or "good communist comrade" differentiating it slightly from the simple comrade.

I always thought "Tovarisch" would work well considering the theme of this site.

[img]images/clipart/Prog_On.gif[/img]
My butt remains as red as the People's Cube and twice as sore due to the multiple micro/macro aggressions in your post!

5/12/2015, 11:20 am

Kommissar Uberdave,

While I always hate to be wrong, I must make a confession.

I made errors in the math I used regarding hummingbirds vs. cats.

And, I apologize.

I mean, all that conversion stuff was really confusing and I had a bad feeling about it.

Turns out, 20 grams x 50 = 1 Kilogram = 2.2 lbs.

10 lbs,, the average weight of a cat vs. 2.2 lbs., the average weight of a gaggle of hummingbirds means I beat you by a mile! (And, to think I thought it was close!)

Once again, I do apologize. That should make all things better.

Oh yes, and I think “Tovarisch” is a beautiful word!

P.S. I don't want to post erroneous calculations on the Cube or, for that matter, beat a dead horsecat.

5/20/2015, 9:21 pm

6/5/2015, 7:11 am

Has anyone clarified if micro-aggression is measured in English or Metric?

6/6/2015, 9:15 pm

If it's measured according to imperial, you can fit more micro-aggressions in.

6/6/2015, 11:48 pm

All of this fuss over a Nobel Peace Prize ? Forget that !

All any comrade needs to do is go to this Mexican ......uh....... Latino drive-thru just down the street. Just say the secret code words " give me the special " and they'll fix you right up.

After all, when he was told he had "won" the Nobel, Dear Leader Obama was quoted as saying : "I really shouldn't accept this." and proceeded to take it anyways. And why not ???
He paid for the award, didn't he ?

Well, you're paying for the shrimp tacos, so why shouldn't you get one too ? All party members should have equal opportunity of receiving world-wide acclaim for doing absolutely notthhhing.

Btw: I ( Krasnodar ) am pleased to have stumbled my wwaay back to The Cube ....... PerfoRming yur ownn lobotomeez cccann leav yyu out ovit ffoora wwile.

6/7/2015, 8:10 am

Krasno!

Welcome back comrade. There have been infestations of rodents, and while your ration card is still under the oil can in the toolroom for safekeeping, your actual rations continue to disappear. It's a mystery to me too. I blame the squirrels.

Now get back to your beets, your quota still has to be met....

6/17/2015, 8:20 pm

In a world turned upside-down, I wish to comply by posting a new slogan:

My Micro-Aggression is smaller than Your Micro-Aggression!

HA! So there!

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