Greetings, fellow oppressed human beings!

I am back from my yearlong indoctrination from my enlightened tutors in a secret institute miles deep under Pyongyang. You see, they were cloned, with superior DPRK technology, from Herbert Marcuse, Theodor Adorno, and the rest of the Frankfurt School, so I am getting my bribe money's worth. Please, reply anytime whenever you're interested!

Now that I have finally abandoned capitalist ideas of eating meat and having three meals a day, I am now totally fit to rule the worker's paradise of Korea. But first, I would like to know what have I missed over the past few months. It saddens me that I have neglected to keep taps on all of you this whole time.

I wish to know of this Pathetic Phallus person that has been stinking up this propaganda center like a drunk old man with kimchi stuffed up his mouth. Is he/she/it the New New ParaMime? I am dying to meet him... in an undisclosed location 10 km from the Tumen River, that is.

[img]images/clipart/Prog_Off.gif[/img]

No offense to all of you conservative statists, but I deplore the utter inadequacy of most of the Republican candidates for this election. On the other hand, if you're a Ron Paul fanatic, please, don't be afraid to count me as your fellow traveler.

WE thought you'd been executed in the last purge. We long ago learned not to ask too many questions regarding the where abouts of any comrade no longer seen in the gulags.

Groucho Marxist wrote:WE thought you'd been executed in the last purge. We long ago learned not to ask too many questions regarding the where abouts of any comrade no longer seen in the gulags.

That explains why my family got this in the government approved mail about a month ago.

Kim Jong-Un wrote:
[img]images/clipart/Prog_Off.gif[/img]

No offense to all of you conservative statists, but I deplore the utter inadequacy of most of the Republican candidates for this election. On the other hand, if you're a Ron Paul fanatic, please, don't be afraid to count me as your fellow traveler.

why the Prog off.. Ron Paul is the perfect candidate for all socialists everywhere. who else could lead to the violent overthrow of the pacifists?

Jong Un, you were apparently before my time, but I feel it incumbent upon me, nevertheless, to welcome you back to The Cube™. It will be good to have someone so close to the Frankfurt school back in our midst, where we, unfortunately, have to live with inferior schools and inferior western technology on a daily basis.

Welcome back, Comrade!

Kim Jong Un,

Er, uh, did you bring back any kind of special wrinkle cream? Don't you be believing that old superstition that black don't crack. It do, girl, it do, and I be needin' some.

Leninka.... try looking waaaayyyy in the back of your refrigerator and see if you have any of your Goat Nog left over from the holidays. Apply liberally with a trowel to your facial voids and see what happens...........

I guarantee nobody will recognize you ! And your skin won't crackle when you smile :)

To the newly-re-arrived Kim Jong-Un personage,

I checked out the NPR ......ah....... DPRK travel brochure. This photo looks to be somewhere near the Tumen River. That meeting you mentioned would be about five miles back from this spot. Witnesses shouldn't be of any concern ..... there won't be any.


What a cheery place ! I can see why it has such an appeal to visitors.

Krasnodar wrote:Leninka.... try looking waaaayyyy in the back of your refrigerator and see if you have any of your Goat Nog left over from the holidays. Apply liberally with a trowel to your facial voids and see what happens...........

I guarantee nobody will recognize you ! And your skin won't crackle when you smile :)

Gee, Krasnodar,

That sounds good enough to eat. I'll try it. Thank you.