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DNC to end Bernie's run for president?

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[img]/images/Sanders_Hillary_Thieves_Computers.jpg[/img]

WASHINGTON, DC - As Bernie Sanders fights for relevance in the media party, Team Hillary confiscated all of his campaign supporter information, explaining it by the fact that Bernie was the first to cheat in order to get ahead in the DNC elections.

Experts believe that neither Sanders nor Clinton violated any of the ethical rules as thievery is the norm according to Democratic Party standards and the winner is usually the one with the most chutzpah, pull, money, and superdelegates. As a bonus, the winner gets to label the loser a thief and a criminal if he or she finds doing so politically expedient, as it was in this case.

Democratic front-runner Hillary Clinton stated during her presser, "Criminals should not run for office and therefore Bernie is officially disqualified. No vice president job for you, Mr. Sanders."
While Clinton was answering carefully screened questions from the media, one reporter got out of line and asked her about her emails, to which she responded, "What difference does it make? It's Bernie Sanders who's the thief here, not me."

The reporter was then promptly nudged into the adjacent room for a training session in mandatory self-criticism, subordination, and accepting the inevitable. When he was seen later that afternoon, the reporter, slightly disheveled and disoriented, filed a report titled, "You will vote for Queen Hillary and you will like it."

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It should be quite entertaining. Who knows, Bill might start a glee club for young female interns and I can't wait to see who gets invited to sleep-over in the Lincoln bedroom. Personally, I'm looking forward to at least 8 more years of Prog-gress toward that inevitable day - the glorious moment - when dawn breaks on the first morning of Next Tuesday.™

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Comrades, former Bernie supporters are getting gifts from Hillary Clinton Distribution Centers. The H-cream will be in your stockings and shoes for the 25th.

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Hammer and Loupe wrote:Comrades, former Bernie supporters are getting gifts from Hillary Clinton Distribution Centers. The H-cream will be in your stockings and shoes for the 25th.

This H-cream, is it like Preparation H? Because I want to be ready when Queen Hillary gloriously becomes Monarch and screws me up the ass with the throbbing Washington Monument of government.

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Comrade Stierlitz wrote:
Hammer and Loupe wrote:Comrades, former Bernie supporters are getting gifts from Hillary Clinton Distribution Centers. The H-cream will be in your stockings and shoes for the 25th.

This H-cream, is it like Preparation H? Because I want to be ready when Queen Hillary gloriously becomes Monarch and screws me up the ass with the throbbing Washington Monument of government.
It gets rid of the Bernie feeling, why not?

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I never knew Bernie campaign had a bunch of pansies. They are yet to bloom when Bernie kicked them out.

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The Democrats made a two-bit break-in of DNC headquarters and the theft of the DNC favorite hookers and their phone numbers list the crime of the century (Watergate). But this! This!

Sanders should just shoot himself right now and get it over with.

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Hammer and Loupe wrote:I never knew Bernie campaign had a bunch of pansies. They are yet to bloom when Bernie kicked them out.

[OFF]

Of course it's the DNC to blame and not "holy, infallible" bernie. Something tells me this is a ruse to rally bernie's supporters stronger against against hillary.

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Comrades, I just want to bump this up for the occasion. Not that I wanted to say I told you so, but... I told you so.

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I asked one of the party apparatchiks attending the DNC to pick me up some Bernie Sanders souvenirs.

He said the merchandise sold out faster than Bernie did.


 
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