Comrades,

Don't panic in the coming days as the Sestak story gets more and more coverage.

The fix is in. The fix is in for the fixer. There will be no Fixer-Gate coming out of this. No sirree! Not if we here at the Cube can help it.

Okay, let me make myself perfectly clear. As you know, some high level White House official supposedly offered Congressional Candidate Joe Sestak a job if he would withdraw from his primary challenge to Dear Arlen Specter.

As well, another Democratic Congressional challenger, from Colorado, Andrew Romanoff, in yet another primary race, back on September 27, 2009 told the Denver Post that a certain Jim Messina, Dear Leader's White House Deputy Chief of Staff offered him a high level government position if he agreed to drop his planned primary challenge to incumbent U.S. Senator Michael Bennet.

According to the article in the Denver Post, Jim Messina was Dear Leader's "deputy chief of staff and a storied fixer in the White House political shop."

Fixer? Poppycock. He was no fixer. There's no such thing as a fixer, and there will be no Fixer-Gate here.

Thank goodness, Comrade Eric Holder would never bring this to adjudication! The fix is in! And this story is going nowhere!

I repeat: disregard anything you hear about Jim Messina being the White House Fixer! He's no fixer. No way, no how, did he offer any jobs to Mr. Sestak, or Mr. Romanoff.

I'm a fixer,
He's a fixer,
Wouldn't you like to be a fixer, too?

Comrades, I brought this highly classified link up here from below so that you may better understand who the heck Jim Messina is -Someone named names back in March and no one but the Denver Post and the American Spectator told the story

https://spectator.org/archives/2010/03/16/specter-opens-door-on-white-ho

The White House thoroughly investigated The White House about the spurious allegations of this Sestak affair, and conclusively pronounced that it had never taken place. In fact, there is no candidate named Sestak in any federal, state, or local election, nor does the name appear in any telephone directory in Pennsylvania. Furthermore, the White House does not have a staff, so it is quite impossible that some "White House Official" could have offered this mythological Sestak creature any kind of position in the Administration, which, the White House was quick to point out, does not exist, so there were no positions to be offered in any case.

So lemme get this straight, the new current truth is that the seriousness of the allegations no longer demand an investigation? Ok, just making sure I got that straight. Because when Bush was President it was the other way around.

Ahem, comrades, these charges are so absurd that no one in their right mind would even consider investigating. Why it's as absurd as claiming that Obama isn't a natural born citizen. It's as absurd as suggesting that he's using a fraudulent Social Security number from a State where he never even lived, like Connecticut. It's as absurd as suggesting that his illegal alien undocumented Aunt was granted asylum because she threatened to disclose that he was born in Kenya and she had documented proof. It's as absurd as suggesting that he and his wife both voluntarily surrendered their law licenses as part of a plea bargain for unethical behavior. It's as absurd as suggesting that there was some crooked connection between them and Tony Rezko, or Blagoevich. It's as absurd as suggesting he's really a Muslim or a Marxist or that he has connections to ACORN or the SEIU.

It's as absurd as all of that. I laugh out loud comrades, HAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA! Ha.

Please remember - comrade Sestak swore and swore and swore he told the TRUTH, TRUTH, TRUTH. What more do you want ... a Sestak of Bibles?

I am uncertain why comrade Sestak said what he did or how he thought it would help him politically, but what matters is he SAID he told the truth. This makes him APPEAR honest and that should be more than sufficient.

Also Dear Leader's aids and lawyers SAID that nothing untoward happened, again sufficient.

Case Closed.

We can all take a cue from Comrade Robert Gibbs. During the following press conferences when asked about the Sestak claim, he said the following nefarious clear and concise statements:

February 22, 2010

"I was traveling for a couple of days, as you know. I haven't looked into this."

March 1, 2010

"I have not made any progress on that. I was remiss on this and I apologize."

March 11, 2010

"I don't have anything additional on that."

"I don't have it today."

March 12, 2010

"I don't have any more information on that."

Let's just call Mr. Gibbs: "Stonewall Gibbs."

I asked Saint Nansky about all this and she said:


Anyway,when in doubt it's Bush's fault. This is one of the prime directives Comrades.

Comrade Whoopie wrote:So lemme get this straight, the new current truth is that the seriousness of the allegations no longer demand an investigation? Ok, just making sure I got that straight. Because when Bush was President it was the other way around.

Ahem, comrades, these charges are so absurd that no one in their right mind would even consider investigating. Why it's as absurd as claiming that Obama isn't a natural born citizen. It's as absurd as suggesting that he's using a fraudulent Social Security number from a State where he never even lived, like Connecticut. It's as absurd as suggesting that his illegal alien undocumented Aunt was granted asylum because she threatened to disclose that he was born in Kenya and she had documented proof. It's as absurd as suggesting that he and his wife both voluntarily surrendered their law licenses as part of a plea bargain for unethical behavior. It's as absurd as suggesting that there was some crooked connection between them and Tony Rezko, or Blagoevich. It's as absurd as suggesting he's really a Muslim or a Marxist or that he has connections to ACORN or the SEIU.

It's as absurd as all of that. I laugh out loud comrades, HAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA! Ha.

sweet fancy gulags! I had not heard of all these juicy unfounded allegations (WOW! this is most interesting stuff... let me write all this down so I don't forget...). All of this should all be un-investigated by loyal comrade Eric Holder, so it can be officially closed and burned.
Are there no lengths of gossipness,that the Republipukes will go to? They would be much happier to accept that Obama is their "daddy" as James Carvile so stupidly oh wait, that was Obama... as Carvile was wisely says! Papa Bama! Except it! Live it! Nothing to see here; move along!

Comrade Whoopie, you are of forgetfulness about Dear Leader's time in Pakistan and the wonderment of what was the passport he to do the traveling there with.

Yes, thanks for reminding me of that absurdity Mrs. Al. That's as absurd as the other absurd absurdities I mentioned. Those Republicans are lying liars and poopy heads with poopy pants. And let's not forget that poopy absurdity that he applied for scholarships claiming that he was a foreign student and that's why he dare not release his college transcripts. The implication being that he's either a foreigner or committed fraud, a no win situation for him.

Oh those dirty Republicans are sneaky bastards. Using commonsense to confuse the masses.

Comrade Whoopie wrote:....Those Republicans are lying liars and poopy heads with poopy pants. .....

Such bad language, Comrade "Pooster". 5 min. in the corner for you!

I don't know what all the fuss is about, its just the way things get done. The sooner those filthy rethuglikkkans realize Obama only does what is good for us (because we serfs are too stupid to know ourselves) the better off we'll all be.

I hear it was a right wing smear anyways...

Who's this Joe Sestak and the other guy from Colorado (rhetorical)? I've been tuned into Laika and the transmissions haven't said a word about these guys.

. . . wait a sec, am I smelling a conspiracy here Leninka? Conspirators are some weird offshoot of the Reichwing, and I won't tolerate the Reichwingers.

Excellent cover up photo Comrade Buffoon. This is the type of propaganda we must keep feeding the masses until they are completely convinced of our Current Truth.

Comrade Elliott:

This article is most informative, but keep it to yourself.

https://spectator.org/archives/2010/03/16/specter-opens-door-on-white-ho

Leninka wrote:Excellent cover up photo Comrade Buffoon. This is the type of propaganda we must keep feeding the masses until they are completely convinced of our Current Truth

Danke Leninka, it is the truth you know...

Most equal creation, Comrade Buffoon! I like how you always happen to be in the middle of every pivotal event, unnoticed by everyone due to the cunning disguising contraption on your head. Works perfectly, just like the Cone of Silence in our posts, visible only to the initiated.

Glad to have a comrade with such superpowers in our ranks.

Comrade Buffoon, oh yes, what a glorious photo! This should be in all news media for clarification and clearification of his good name! (and might I inquire to the camera you use? Besides you being at the right place at the right time, I love the camera captions... so we can clearly read what they actually said, instead of waiting on the press. Good job!)

Leninka,

As good progressives, we must accept whatever the State tells us is the truth
IF 2+2= 5 then it does

Who are we to believe? What our common sense and eyes tells us or what the State tells us is the truth

Danke More Equaler Red Square! Were it not for Leninka shedding light on the Fixer I would still be crouched in the corner, sweating beets and worrying that Dear Leader may be subject to charges of high crimes! Why he and his henchmen elite party members are subject to laws at all is just silly... SILLY!

Fraulein Pulloskies, I have many cameras!


Each registered with the state of course. I'm allowed to own so many only after I signed a contract stating I would never capture any elite party members engaged in any hi jinks or criminality... not that any would ever engage in such activities mind you...

On an unrelated note, I woke this morning and flipped through a few channels on the tube and somehow landed on MTV's Teen Cribs. I would like to formally denounce this program since it flaunts such inequality.

Why should some teens reside in such luxury when others don't?

Surely Dear Leader is working on this evil problem.

Each registered with the state of course. I'm allowed to own so many only after I signed a contract stating I would never capture any elite party members engaged in any hi jinks or criminality... not that any would ever engage in such activities mind you...

wheeee, I can hear those deep sighs of much relief, can you not?!

oops, I am saying we are so thrilled with your work to expose criminality, wherever it lays lies by whoever and that we are, "wheee", never involved in such activities. DO NOT TRY TO SAY OTHERWISE, THERE IS NO EVIDENCE! I denounce for your trying to say such!!

Comrades,

A little more on the link I provided for Comrade Elliott. It his highly classified. If you type in Sestak and American Spectator it does not come on Google. Surely and wisely, Google has scrubbed it from appearing. However, the article is still in existence and available here to inner party members:

https://spectator.org/archives/2010/03/16/specter-opens-door-on-white-ho

[quote] Specter Opens Door on White House FeloniesBy Jeffrey Lord on 3.16.10 @ 6:09AM
"There's a crime called misprision of a felony. Misprision of a felony is when you don't report a crime. So you're getting into pretty deep areas here in these considerations." -- U.S. Senator Arlen Specter on March 12, 2010

"Right now, they're doing the 'I won't confirm or deny,' and for us, it leaves two possibilities. One is the promise of transparency in this administration is just shot. The second one is even worse, which is either Sestak is lying or the administration has done something wrong and is covering it up…" -- U.S. Congressman Darrell Issa on Friday on March 12, 2010 [/quote]

LIES, THESE ARE ALL LIES.... right? They should not be allowed to get away it this!

Of course, Fraulein. The Amerikan Spectator lied. And Arlen Specter lied.

And Sestak only bloviated in the heat of the moment when he thought Dear Leader was trying to defeat his campaign against Specter, because Dear Leader would never do such a thing as promise someone a job in exchange for anything, anything at all.

sweet fancy gulags, I am of such relief, dear comradess Leninka. I am of hope that dear Papa Bama will do something about the lying, distrustful press and all these flapping mouths. It is not right to degrade our Leader, who is working so hard. We know that, only because he's forever tells us so, so we know, instead of not knowing.
umm, I feel a bit dizzy. . . I think a rest at Jiffy-Lobo is called for....

Leninka wrote:Of course, Fraulein. The Amerikan Spectator lied. And Arlen Specter lied.

And Sestak only bloviated in the heat of the moment when he thought Dear Leader was trying to defeat his campaign against Specter, because Dear Leader would never do such a thing as promise someone a job in exchange for anything, anything at all.

The MSM has too much invested in Obama and attempts to protect him. Of course for every action there is a reaction. The MSM is actually doing him a disservice and themselves by making it so easy on him. Obama is becoming like the pampered child who thinks he can do no wrong. As such, he will/has over reached and is ill prepared for something as basic as a press conference. As for the MSM, who really believes them anymore- their credibility with the public was bad but now, it is almost all gone.


Papa Obama can do wrong. Since all his efforts are for the good of the people and the state, he is infallible. It is we, who are flawed in our inability to see the "grandness" of his plans

Papa Obama can do wrong. Since all his efforts are for the good of the people and the state, he is infallible. It is we, who are flawed in our inability to see the "grandness" of his plans

That is the biggest kissass most loyal comment I've ever read. I have a tear............