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Early Progressives Saved Earth from Global Warming

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Scientists are reporting that early global warming from methane emissions of dinosaurs was probably stopped by "progressive" cavemen who convinced neanderthals around the world to stop using dinosaurs as transportation.

Scientists from GoreTel, a non-partisan think tank based in Washington, DC, believe a combination of high taxes and regulation of the dinosaur industry probably saved earth from a dangerous cataclysm during the Jurrasic period. In addition, evidence suggests some non-adopters of the policies were clubbed to death, thereby forcing compliance.

The researchers noted that there are "striking similarities to modern times" with the possible exception that the dinosaur industry no longer exists.

Artist's depiction before adoption of "methane markets"

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After (notice the smiles!):

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Comrade Circenses, these cave persons are smiling because they got in on the ground floor of the methane credits market, much like our own Algore™ but with better vocabularies (swear words hadn't been invented yet).

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Actually, I used the wrong picture - that is the new Chevy Dolt coming out in Model Year 2013, I think each one has only $1500 in government subsidies on it - that is an improvement, right?

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Early Progressives? There is a word for that: PROGLODYTES.

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And after they killed the dinosaur economy the cold came from the north ushering in the Ice Age and they had to stop production of the Flintstones TV series. A mile high glacier covered Bedrock.

There's a moral in what happened to Bedrock but don't expect Proglodytes to learn by it.

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Red Square wrote:Early Progressives? There is a word for that: PROGLODYTES.
I politely disagree with Comrade Square. Proglodytes still exist today. Just now they are coming out of their winter slumber and their parent's basement caves to Occupy the vast metropolises in search of handouts.

It is the Paleoprogs that the modern People's Archaeologists are searching for in the substrata of time layered progdom.

A good example would be Helen Thomas.
Ed Asner too.

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I would think the Prog DNA is so similar between them that science can't distinguish the difference.

Perhaps we should construct a special "Metroproglises" so that they can live with their own kind observing their own ancient heritage and culture and finally kill each other off far away from me.

What a crock of dinosaur poop!
Seems like the natural decomposition of all that vegetable matter when the plant eventually dies anyway will produce the same amount of gases regardless of whether the plant is eaten or not.
Fluken fools........

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Sounds to me like Comrade Gore's " Jurassic jam". That can be shortened to "Jurass-Al".
Last edited by General Confusion on 5/9/2012, 11:52 am, edited 1 time in total.
Reason for editing this post: delete extra word

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paleogore.jpg

Jurassic Fart
PaleoGore Confronts Dino Flatulence

Checking out his Carbon Butt Print.
Giving ex-stink-t meaning

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New scientific discoveries in Paleo-Anthropology reveal that Early Progressive Womyn known as Proglodytes saved Mother Earth from Anthropogenic Global Warming by causing a dramatic reduction in the rate of reproduction of early humans:

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--KOOK

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We are finding that in effort to curb dinosaur flatulence, primitive wimmin, thinking ecologically, decided that we needed smaller transportation, and that the dinosaurs were too big and producing too much methane.

They developed a smaller work animal, and indeed it is so small that it produces virtually no methane at all.

It's the crab louse and they were all so loyal that they were all infected willingly.

Alas, modern pediculicides are so good now that that particularly virulent strain of crab louse only exists today on Comrade Gawdawfulho.
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At first I bet you thought you were seeing floaters in your eyes, didn't you? No, comrades; those are the evolved crab lice having a rodeo.

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Dear Janeane. She's the gift that just keeps giving. She's pure prog: mean, stupid, and utterly and completely miserable, masking it with self-righteous and entitlement.

And she did this BEFORE Jiffy-Lobo™. The gyrl has star power. Red-star power.

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Please, put a bag over that crab louse sir. Sheeesh... This is a family website!

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$$, frankly I'd rather you put trousers on her.

We are so lucky that she hasn't lifted her arms.

Can you see the lice sliding down her hair? They're piste.

(Sorry.)

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Put trousers on her? Hey, I just ate! Yech. I wouldn't touch her with your ten foot shovel.




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KOOK wrote:New scientific discoveries in Paleo-Anthropology reveal that Early Progressive Womyn known as Proglodytes saved Mother Earth from Anthropogenic Global Warming by causing a dramatic reduction in the rate of reproduction of early humans:

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--KOOK

Comrade, In order to promote equality and diversity we must provide a porportionate representation of the Proglodykes.

Here is one possibility.
rachel_maddow_a_p.jpg

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Carbon butt print...that's why it's called JurASSic
Proglodytes were there...that's also why it's called JurASSic


(Or might we call a single specimen a Proglosaurus? Or even better, ProgloSoros)

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Castrate, I like Proglodyke. It makes such sense. I was muttering it aloud and Bruno took to it instantly. Now I don't know if things are better than before; instead of mules or stiletto-heel pumps, he's now wearing Doc Martens. Next he'll let a dog lick his mouth and call it a kiss.

Well, that's minor. As I've said, when the Anointed (with OPM and Other People's Oil) all get together, and they lock the doors, they sink to all fours and sniff each other's butts.

Why do you think that Joe Biden has had to have so many hair plugs? He's worn it off kissing progressive ass. And there must be something in the fumes which he's inhaled. Am I imagining things or is he even stupider than before?

I'm not complaining.

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ROCK, have you thought of a Janeane Gawdawfulho HazMat suit?

It's to protect the fleas.


 
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