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Find Out When You Should Die!

5/28/2008, 8:45 pm
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Here's a great toy for every girl and boy. Just click on the picture:

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This is actually for children and it is for real. If you answer all the questions truthfully you'll die at a very young age. Me? I found out that pigs really can fly and I'm going to live forever!

This is an educational toy for children.

And remember, "don't use more than your fair share of the earth's resources" kids, or you'll die.
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5/28/2008, 9:37 pm
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I ran myself through the mill and discovered that I should have committed suicide (in an ecologically responsible manner, of course) 42.7 years ago.
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5/28/2008, 9:45 pm
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I used up my fair share at the age of 8.7.
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5/28/2008, 10:12 pm
Did you mess with that 'income' dial? Apparently, spending money is a big no-no in the new global warming world!
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5/28/2008, 10:27 pm
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According to this calculator the best you can do is die at age 1.1, of course this is B.S. What about the very low carbon footprint of the aborted?
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5/28/2008, 11:41 pm
And there's no mention of the greenhouse conversion rate for anyone over the age of 10 who submits to the "Soylent Green" nutritional wafer process.
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5/29/2008, 12:13 am
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See an article on Altruism at the People's Glossary:

Propaganda Directorate wrote:On our planet with limited resources, an ultimate act of Altruism would be to stop eating and starve to death. Progressive science has determined that being deprived of food and water produces a sense of euphoria and those who die from starvation experience painless, tranquil deaths. In 1932 alone, six million Ukrainians altruistically starved to death, thus furthering the advance of socialism and industrialization in the USSR. (See "Ukraine: Altruism on the Rise as Socialism Leaps to New Heights" by Walter Duranty, the Pulitzer Prize winning correspondent for The New York Times in Moscow.)
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5/29/2008, 4:26 am
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I hereby decree that party members are exempt from taking the quiz and if they do then the proles must pay for what we used... because we did it for them.
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5/29/2008, 3:09 pm
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Wow. Just, wow. That was very nauseating. I am a big carbon piggy. I blew up and sent guts and greasy fat all over the inside of the barn.

Did you all watch any of the Greena videos? I mean, what a proletariat heroine she is. If you watch said videos, you will learn that having a ring in your nose, and not bathing is a sign of your ultimate coolness. She has taught me, I'm ceasing bathing for the good of the planet.

Please, everyone watch the Greena videos.

RIK
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5/29/2008, 3:27 pm
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Yep....as soon as Australia outlawed guns the nutcases took over...........
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5/29/2008, 4:16 pm
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Blogagog wrote:Did you mess with that 'income' dial? Apparently, spending money is a big no-no in the new global warming world!

All you have to do is manipulate (like Al Gore) the little slider to say you spent on carbon credits or some such "responsible" crap, and you are entitled to live forever. My refinery stocks count, right?
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5/29/2008, 5:25 pm
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Rikalonius wrote:Did you all watch any of the Greena videos? I mean, what a proletariat heroine she is. If you watch said videos, you will learn that having a ring in your nose, and not bathing is a sign of your ultimate coolness. She has taught me, I'm ceasing bathing for the good of the planet.

Please, everyone watch the Greena videos.

RIK

If it saves just one whale, it's worth it!

However. Greena committed a grave act against a protected species! She had the gall to KICK that poor defenseless whale on the fin! I mean, it even left a shoe print!

Trade her shovel for a trowel and put her on the excavation crew for the foundation for a high-rise apartment complex! She needs to rediscover her true proletarian roots...
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5/29/2008, 6:34 pm
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//off
In fact, Greena videos seem to be mocking her and her views. But the 'Pig" calculator is made by someone who might as well be a prototype for Greena's character: an idiot who has no idea of money, investment, bills, and anything else they were supposedly calculating there.
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5/29/2008, 7:39 pm
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Funny, I thought the same thing myself. Then, I re-visited the site, and all the rest is the usual emotional bilge about CO2. I also don't think these types care about the reality of daily living, budgets and the cost of living...

All they know is what makes them feel good, and what makes them "cool." They ignore everything else.
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5/29/2008, 11:33 pm
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I should have been worm food 28 years ago. Damn.
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5/30/2008, 1:56 am
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Okay, I was supposed to die at 13. Someone isn't doing their jobs....
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5/30/2008, 8:21 am
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What, you're over 13 now? Something's gone wrong in the filing department. Thanks for reminding us. Green Maria will be dispatched shortly.

Happy to serve the people, but most importantly - the planet.
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6/1/2008, 10:45 pm
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Crap....
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