Comrades!

We have all known how well strong Communism works as a cure for weak Liberalism. Politburo member Joe Garcia (Democratic Socialist Party- Florida) was recruiting on a Google Hangout, and was overheard saying:

The safest city in America is El Paso, TX. It happens to be across the border from the most dangerous city in the America's, which is Juarez. Right?” Garcia said. "Two of the safest cities in America are on the border with Mexico. Of course, the reason is we've proved that communism works. If you give everybody a good government job, there is no crime.

You can hear him for yourself, here:

Good government shovel ready jobs for everyone!

He would be a better spokesman for the cause if he had not been filmed picking and eating his earwax last week. Comrade, please!

Rep. Joe Garcia (D-Florida) wrote:we've proved that communism works. If you give everybody a good government job, there is no crime.

Exactly right! Just like in the USSR - everybody had a government job and there was absolutely no crime! And so there were also no prisons, no labor camps, no guarded settlements, no deportations, and no executions. There was also no police, no KGB, no GRU, no army, and no minefields with barbed wire fences along the borders. Everyone who stepped across the border immediately received a government job and lived happily ever after as a welcome member of the prosperous community.

And no one went hungry either, because in the absence of regular showers due to hot water shortages, everybody had enough foodstuffs collected inside their ears to sustain them for weeks!

Observe Rep. Joe Garcia tapping into his personal emergency food supply inside his ear live on C-Span.

Red Square wrote: there were also no prisons, no labor camps, no guarded settlements, no deportations, and no executions. There was also no police, no KGB, no GRU, no army, and no minefields with barbed wire fences along the borders.

After the Realization of Communism, Criminals were supposed to know to arrest themselves.

And we know that Ukrainians in the 1930s were well fed, and that's why Ukrainian peasants were so quiet back then.

Joe Garcia has class, comrades. Notice: He ate with his right hand - sure,...BUT...he picked his teeth with his left hand! (Although I must admit, I can't be sure whether or not he recycled what he picked out of his teeth back into his other ear. That was off screen and remains a mystery)

Did Dear Leader Obama phone to congratulate comrade Garcia on his commie-ing out?

Great Stalin's Ghost wrote:And we know that Ukrainians in the 1930s were well fed, and that's why Ukrainian peasants were so quiet back then.

Well, according to Comrade Walter Duranty of the NY Times back then,

The big cities and the army are adequately supplied with food. There is no actual starvation or deaths from starvation, but there is widespread mortality from diseases due to malnutrition.

This was because isolated districts neglected to serve government-approved Highly Nutritious™ meals of the type that Dear Leaderess is forcing upon selflessly encouraging in schools today. So you see, Government Is Good; Individualism Is Bad.

But ... (everyone sing along, please) ...

There was no famine,
This we know
Because the NY Times
Told us so.