Comrades,

We should most definitely join in the celebration with these 300K proles in just Florida alone who were joyously liberated this week from their wasteful, inefficient and bourgeois private health care plans.

Just image the great relief they must be experiencing to be unshackled from the oppressive and burdensome responsibility of providing for one's own health insurance. It is most assuredly an awesome comfort for them to know that they exchanged their current healthcare for Hope and Change.

This Hope and Change will sustain them most gloriously as that is all there is until the website gets back up and running. The People's IT workers are confident that the website will be up and running smoothly in just a few quick years.

Now that healthcare has been fixed, it is heartening to know that Obama himself will be devoting his tireless energies into fixing immigration next.

Meanwhile in California, arithmetic genius discovers 1 + 1 = 2!

“The arithmetic is inescapable,” said Patrick Johnston, chief executive officer of the California Association of Health Plans. Costs must be spread, so while some consumers will see their premiums drop, others will pay more -- “no matter what people in Washington say.”

Mr. Johnston was discovered missing from his higher math institute Friday morning. A hand scrawled note found on the floor suggests he was "taking a trip" to Washington for additional math training.