ATHENS, GREECE -- With the crowd chanting "Toga! Toga! Toga!", Greek President Karolos Papoulias announced 130 Billion Euros in aid from Euro-zone countries.

Public service unions immediately called for the money to be quickly spent on "alcohol and parties" and began mobilizing for street demonstrations and strikes until their demands were met.

A Union official named George Papadopalus spoke about the ongoing efforts to "derail austerity" while union members echoed his words using the "human microphone" method popular with US-based Occupy Wall Street protestors.

"We Greeks don't want austerity. When we get the check - cash it! Let's have a party!" Taking a conciliatory note, he added "We can invite the Germans, if they bring their own beer. But we draw the line with the French."

Add'l reporting by the Hell Gazette

WHAT AUSTERITY?
THIS IS SPARTA!!!

We should all recognize this as ample evidence of the success of the European Model, and understand that as the world globalizes we can all enjoy such bail outs.

"I, for one, am not going to sit here and listen to the European Union badmouth the Hellenic Republic of Greece."

"Toga! Toga! Toga!"

I suppose the rethugs are against a good ol'fashioned $xx trillion Toga party too...

"Two Zero One Three were gonna party like it's 2012"

Hail Obama!

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ZB