Comrades,

There's an awful lot of brouhaha regarding "high speed" rail these days. Some state governors have rejected the... 'handouts'... offered to them by our overly-generous federal benefactors to build a high speed world class train system that will connect small towns under 100 miles apart, with the goal to ultimately eliminate the need for cars and buses that are hopelessly addicted to fossil fuel, better known as OIL. Once we get rid of our addiction to oil, maybe then we can work on getting rid of our addiction to the blood that runs in our veins too.

With the help of the good Colonel 7.62, I was able to find a suitable wormhole to actually go into the future of the Progressive World of Next Tuesday™ to bring back this image of things yet to come.

Keep on wiff dat Hopin' thang, Comrades!

Comrade Whinny, It suprises me not see Herr Biden in this futuristic picture with his current devotion to getting kick backs from the failed money pit Amtrak experience one would have thought he would have been at least the conductor of this train.

I had a second cousin who was addicted to oil. Sadly we was also a smoke at the same time.

It would be so helpful, especially to the little people, to have a railing road throughout the U.S., would it not? Why, of course it would. Dear Leader is so smart to have thought of this and I am full of anxiousness to drive one!

Frau, how lovely you'd look with your hair blowing back as you speed along in Obama's high tech, high speed choo-choo train. Just remember to keep your mouth shut so you don't get bugs in your teeth.

BTW proles: All that beet shoveling will make you uniquely qualified to shovel coal into the boiler.

(Note to RS, please contact the Obama regime for job training subsidies)

Fraulein, just whom do you know to get a nice, new shiny train like that one? What blackmail do you have? This is way above your pay grade as a Commissar. Now I am the first to admire you and all you stand for--the theft, rapine, lies, character assassination, wholesale dishonesty. All that stuff turns me on so much that between you and Pinkie and Leninka you might change my luck.

But if you've been getting special favors before me, there will be hell to pay.

Because I'm Father Prog Theocritus. I'm the great, entitled, made prog me.

Comrade Whoopie wrote:Frau, how lovely you'd look with your hair blowing back as you speed along in Obama's high tech, high speed choo-choo train. Just remember to keep your mouth shut so you don't get bugs in your teeth.
..

now you tell me, as always, days and hours late. I have the remains of half the bugs in the gulag, stuff in my teeth.

Brtoher Prog, I can not divulge my blackmailing techniques . . womanly charms to just any Prog who ask. I am no lowly "commissar" but a high ranking Judge of my own judgeship appointings.
Might I sugguest you seek your own special favorings? The head of the Democratic Special Favor Czar is in town this very day and I hear he is looking to "have a good time". Taking him out for a good night on the town, might do the trick.... and you are the Prog of trickery and dance, are you not!

Yes, I am the prog of trickery and dance. In fact the whole Rancho is a testament to the terpsichorean abilities of Bruno. Well, the damn thing is about to fall down around my ears because of him, but that's what I tell people.

Yes, I think that I will show the Democrat Czar of Special Favors, Set asides, Earmarks, Regulation and Bribes a good time. Then I can get some of the special Roofies that the Democrat party uses in November of every even year.

Father Prog,

The correct word is gleaned from the above advice is “trick”. If you can provide the Czar with enough tricks, and I don't mean sleight-of-hand, he will most gladly furnish you with all the entitlement satisfying goods that are in his possession.

will there be free rail passes for us made-progs and Party™ Members?

Proletariat Robot: I would have loved to add Joe "bite me" and Dark Lord Soros to the train, but alas, not enough room and the images would have ended up too small to see. Not that "bite me" and Dark Lord are that important to gaze upon anyway.

Red Menace: The only "free" rail passes go to politically-connected old people that live in Chikago. All others have to pay equally.

VP Biden is indeed very excited about this project. He called me the other day and told me "WHOO WHOO! CHUGGA-CHUGGA CHUGGA-CHUGGA WHOO WHOO! CHUGGA-CHUGGA...." He is a very articulate man, to say the least.

I found a Gravy Train in the UK:



As humble monk living on a small stipend from the Party every month, I do not know of Gravy Trains. I've heard of such things. Must be nice...

The High Speed Rail locomotive pictured above with the radiant Fraulein Pelloskies at the controls has been designed primarily for use by The People™. The slightly modified version pictured below will be available for use by our Progressive Party leadership.
[attachment=0]Future Trains - A View From The Past.jpg[/attachment]

ah ha! What lovely machinery it is too, Comarde Mac. And I am please to see the Obama symbol, What the F. . . . . Winning the Future on our futuristic machinery.

I denounce all of you. Where are the proles pulling the train? Rolling stock is expensive. Proles are cheap.

I'll send you a few thousand from the Rancho.

Father Prog Theocritus wrote:I denounce all of you. Where are the proles pulling the train? Rolling stock is expensive. Proles are cheap.

I'll send you a few thousand from the Rancho.

I must endorse your denouncement. As sometimes usual, you have hit Stalin on the head. Why waste fuel energy when we have useless proles!? YOU receive an extra ration of vodka, dear sir.

Fraulein, you ought to know by now that I'm always right. By definition.

When I'm right, you say, "Absolutely, Father Prog." When I'm wrong, and I never am, mind, you say, "Up to a point, Father Prog." This has absolutely nothing to do with Evelyn Waugh's Scoop. And I am notLord Copper.

I'm Father Prog Plushbottom Theocritus.

How's this for my new credo?

"Feed a prog, starve a prole."

Father Prog Theocritus wrote:I denounce all of you. Where are the proles pulling the train? Rolling stock is expensive. Proles are cheap.

PEOPLE POWER! Lenin would be so proud!

And when they drop dead of overwork--that is those who work instead of collecting the dole and watching Jerry Springer--we burn them for fuel. Just as the Egyptians burned mummies to power their steam locomotives.

'dem proles is good in Soylent Green, too.

Father Prog,

Wasn't it proles who built the great pyramids so the forefathers of Dark Lord Soros could be buried in infamy? Wasn't it proles who assembled the Coliseums and then afterwards provided the entertainment therein? Wasn't it proles whose corpses were lying and rotting everywhere during the great revolutions of the Communist risings in China, Russia, Cuba and their satelites, all for the explicit purpose of making their new overlords look good and important? Wasn't it proles that were sacrificing their very own bodies to light the way for the important guests who would often participate in Nero's orgies? And wasn't it proles who gave us our present genius of a world-class leader and teleprompter expert?

Indeed they take no credit for making others look good. And that's the way it should be for the elitist few and the Progressive World of Next Tuesday™.

I gathered some of the workers from the NC Kollective and we gave pulling a train a shot:

Father Prog Plushbottom Theocritus,
Looks like we are going to need many, many more. How many did you say you could spare? Also, are there any grant moneys left for a feasibility study?

Grigori E.R., what a glorious example of comradery work force you have gathered and depicted. Good work.
As for how many, how many lowly, eager proles are willing to give it all for dear Leader and the collective? The numbers are endless! (and would this not cut down on the $$ needed to pay retirees?)

"[highlight=#ffff99]and would this not cut down on the $$ needed to pay retirees?[/highlight]"

Yes, Comrade Judge Frau. With "pulling trains" as a career, I'm sure those workers will permanently retire at a very young age.

I'm thinking "shovel ready" doesn't quite fit for these jobs. Maybe "rope ready"?

Whinny, you're exactly right that the proles do everything and that's as it should be.

Because we, as made progs, Bill Maher-level sneering little shits, refuse to acknowledge that anyone has ever done anything of worth--except of course us. Because the world started when we were born. The only people that I respect are those nastier than I am, because I have to, or great thinkers like Marx, for obvious reasons.

I get a positive stiffie when I think of how nice it is to be a made prog and thereby 100% parasite, unaccountable, self-righteous and mean.

I'm off to Wisconsin to have a party with that judge. Anybody wanna come?

Rasputin, your picture of pulling a train is very witty and I say that as a devotee of Project Runway.

Frankly my proles are rather too run down to pull trains any more. If you're properly working your proles, they don't have energy for that.

I work them from can to can't and during their 15-minute break for luncheon I make them sign over their government checks to me.

Next week: training the AARP.

Father Prog Theocritus wrote:Whinny, you're exactly right that the proles do everything and that's as it should be.

Because we, as made progs, Bill Maher-level sneering little shits, refuse to acknowledge that anyone has ever done anything of worth--except of course us. Because the world started when we were born. The only people that I respect are those nastier than I am, because I have to, or great thinkers like Marx, for obvious reasons.

I get a positive stiffie when I think of how nice it is to be a made prog and thereby 100% parasite, unaccountable, self-righteous and mean.

I'm off to Wisconsin to have a party with that judge. Anybody wanna come?

Father Prog,

I wanna be just like you when I grow up. Whether intentional or not (and as a made prog I'm sure many things aren't simply by accident) you're a role model and inspiration.

By the way, Tina Brown called me and was asking if there's anything exciting going down this weekend. I mentioned your plans to join with the judge and coterie. She thinks it's a delightful idea and would most definately want to tag along.

Why thank you, Whinny. There's always room for another prog, as long as we eventually close off the borders to Mount Prog. Which is only three thousand feet tall and yet has no oxygen on top, which neatly explains Nanski Peloski. That's the strategy, you see--open the borders to anyone who will suck at the government tit and reliably vote for more of the same, and make sure that only the select few can climb to the very top.

It's not the glass ceiling. It's the Conspicuous Compassion Ceiling and I'm the commissar of that for all time.

So. More and more dependents; fewer and fewer people to reap the "administrative fees"; and just think of the pleasure that we get from looking down our noses at people who do not match our sophistication.

Why, there are people who are not law professors! We must never let one of them get into power because he might have executive ability and not have spent his entire life encephaloproctologically.

This is a disgrace! -- not the Fraulein, of course, but the shocking appearance of this machine that is to be a symbol of our elitism, smartness, and above all, the superiority of our economic plans: why are we using such a gloriously, modern, decorated engine, when something plain and unadorned would do?

It seems Father Prog is indeed often tempted by our Judge Fraulein. But let's face facts here- it isn't the theft, rapine, lies, character assassination, wholesale dishonesty. No, it's the incredible allure of those amazing wattled dugs that haunts poor Father Prog most..

Царевна wrote:

train.jpg

This is a disgrace! -- not the Fraulein, of course, but the shocking appearance of this machine that is to be a symbol of our elitism, smartness, and above all, the superiority of our economic plans: why are we using such a gloriously, modern, decorated engine, when something plain and unadorned would do?

But as we know, comrade Laapedah.... Uappebah.... Царевна, dear Leader is full of penny pinching ways (especially when these saving trains are for the proles to use). All in the name of saving those rich taxpayers money.

Turboski, I admit that I am fascinated by Fraulein's stippled dugs but then it draws attention from my stippled ass.

But, and this is entre nous[i/] (I'm planning on a trip to France to see what new thing the cheese-eating surrender monkeys have come up with) I see a monetary advantage in those, er, wings that extend from her head. I figure that with her fashion sense I could market those things--Prog Wings?--as a high-fashion device, when they really contain the newest Superheterodyne, Phased-antenna-array tin-foil-hat GE Mark Three.

Unlike the prior models, which could be removed for the occasional delousing of the comrade's head, this one is screwed into the comrade's head with Torx screws. Titanium for people with a Gold or Platinum CCCP Card. Yes, that's just one of the courtesies that we extend premium CCCP members.

So these new fashion accessories will insure that no comrade is ever deprived from totalitarian, blood-thirsty the benison of the soothing voice of Hero Laika, Noble Space Dog, beaming Korrekt Thoughts down 24/7 in case some comrade have a weak moment and heed reality.

So you see that dear Fraulein is really an avenue for me to rake in lots more good money.

Judge Fraulein Pulloskies wrote:

Царевна wrote:

train.jpg

This is a disgrace! -- not the Fraulein, of course, but the shocking appearance of this machine that is to be a symbol of our elitism, smartness, and above all, the superiority of our economic plans: why are we using such a gloriously, modern, decorated engine, when something plain and unadorned would do?

But as we know, comrade Laapedah.... Uappebah.... Царевна, dear Leader is full of penny pinching ways (especially when these saving trains are for the proles to use). All in the name of saving those rich taxpayers money.

Nein, Fraulein, you misunderstand!!! This obviously brand new and grossly decorated train engine is far, far too fancy to represent the People ™.