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Judge Rules Beaverton Beaver Snapping Legal

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Lewd public behavior by entertainment luminaries and Hollywood celebrities is not only tolerated, it is often considered an essential attribute of stardom. For the rest of us, such behavior generally leads to hefty fines and/or imprisonment. But all this may be changing as the prudish and tiresome rules of ancient cultural norms gradually fall by the wayside.

Beaverton, Oregon: An Oregon judge has ruled that a 61-year-old man did nothing illegal when he crouched in the aisle of a Target store and snapped photos up a 13-year-old's skirt. Patrick Buono of Portland didn't dispute using his cellphone to take upskirt photos on Jan. 3 at the store in suburban Beaverton, The Oregonian reported.

Washington County Judge Eric Butterfield said, "These things are not only seen but video-recorded. It's incumbent on us as citizens to cover up whatever we don't want filmed in public places."
Craptek News Service applauds Judge Butterfield's bold assertion, but denounces his lack of sensitivity in matters of Women's Rights. While the judge's reasoning is twisted and confusing, its progressive undertones are equally baffling. Someone once said that clarity is the scourge of simplicity. I couldn't agree less, but remain as always, ambivalent. Welcome to Next Tuesday.™

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Washington County Judge Eric Butterfield said, "These things are not only seen but video-recorded. It's incumbent on us as citizens to cover up whatever we don't want filmed in public places."
This is true. All female-gender-identified entities should dress like this:
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More news from the Republican War on Women -

This guy is a Democrat Party Chairman in Virginia, but I'm sure the killers he wanted to hire would have been Republicans.

Former Democratic Party Chairman In Virginia Tried To Hire Hitman To Kill Girls He Molested…

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Praise Allah, Beaverton has instituted the first step toward Sharia! Women should be covered from head to toe if they want to walk unmolested. Otherwise they are just asking for it...after all, you can't expect an adult make to restrain himself (and its her fault for tempting him, anyway).

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The little trollop. Tempting young impressionable future farmworkers with their citified feminine ways--that' boy's attention may never be right again, but his beet quota only goes up...

I can't find my copy of the "Idiot's Guide to Shaira", Can we have her stoned? Is she old enough for that yet?

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Ivan the Stakhanovets wrote:The little trollop. Tempting young impressionable future farmworkers with their citified feminine ways--that' boy's attention may never be right again, but his beet quota only goes up...

I can't find my copy of the "Idiot's Guide to Shaira", [highlight=#ffff00]Can we have her stoned[/highlight]? Is she old enough for that yet?
Thanks to recent gains by The Party™, the practice of 'stoning' is now legal in some states, like Colorado and Washington. Otherwise, under Sharia she is old enough to be married if any man would have this naughty young temptress as one of his wives.

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Seems to be a lot of that kind of ... weirdness in the Pacific Northwest, of which I'm a native.

There was the guy in Washington a few years back who ... uh... had a horse... He made the news when they found his body in the stall. He had bled to death from anal fissures... YOU connect the dots; that's all I'm going to say about that. The cops said there was no law against doing such a thing in the State of Washington.

Then there was a panty thief in Beaverton back around '05 if I remember correctly. Apparently there IS a law against such a thing in Oregon. He ended up in the jail a few blocks from my house.

There was a great story in the news shortly after I left the region. There's this clothing-optional, all-outdoor hot springs up in the mountains out of Portland. A jealous boyfriend caught a guy hiding in the bushes, watching the women pee! The perp was a relative of one of my high school classmates.

So the boyfriend tied the perp to a tree and called the cops. He took pictures, one of which I saw. They had his face into the tree with his arms partway around it (Oregon has BIG trees).

The cops came, and arrested... the boyfriend.

You see, it's not illegal to watch women pee (at least in Oregon) when they're out in public like that. But it IS illegal to make a false arrest, and tying a man to a tree amounts to arrest.

So, lots of pervs in the Pacific Northwest. And strange laws. I think it must be the rain.
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Mikhail Lysenkomann wrote:Image Seems to be a lot of that kind of ... weirdness in the Pacific Northwest, of which I'm a native.

There was the guy in Washington a few years back who ... uh... had a horse... He made the news when they found his body in the stall. He had bled to death from anal fissures... YOU connect the dots; that's all I'm going to say about that. The cops said there was no law against doing such a thing in the State of Washington.

Then there was a panty thief in Beaverton back around '05 if I remember correctly. Apparently there IS a law against such a thing in Oregon. He ended up in the jail a few blocks from my house.

There was a great story in the news shortly after I left the region. There's this clothing-optional, all-outdoor hot springs up in the mountains out of Portland. A jealous boyfriend caught a guy hiding in the bushes, watching the women pee! The perp was a relative of one of my high school classmates.

So the boyfriend tied the perp to a tree and called the cops. He took pictures, one of which I saw. They had his face into the tree with his arms partway around it (Oregon has BIG trees).

The cops came, and arrested... the boyfriend.

You see, it's not illegal to watch women pee (at least in Oregon) when they're out in public like that. But it IS illegal to make a false arrest, and tying a man to a tree amounts to arrest.

So, lots of pervs in the Pacific Northwest. And strange laws. I think it must be the rain.
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Comrade Lysenkomann,

Confusing, isn't it? Yes means maybe, no means maybe, maybe means probably, and probably means rape. Anal fissures are an occupational hazard for which survivors are rewarded disability and SSI payments. Pee peepers are a manifestation of diversity, and the binding of pee peepers a sign of intolerance. Yes comrade, it's confusing...

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Ivan the Stakhanovets wrote:The little trollop. Tempting young impressionable future farmworkers with their citified feminine ways--that' boy's attention may never be right again, but his beet quota only goes up...

I can't find my copy of the "Idiot's Guide to Shaira", Can we have her stoned? Is she old enough for that yet?

Unfortunately, comrade, she wasn't married at the time so she can only be given 1000 lashes with a cat of 9 tails for tempting a well respected 61 year old man to engage in adulterous imaginings.

Once this hussy, and those of her ilk, learn to stop tempting respectable men then we shall see real progress when it comes to relationships between men and those creatures that are responsible for producing heirs.

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Mikhail Lysenkomann wrote:[img]images/clipart/Prog_Off.gif[/img]
Seems to be a lot of that kind of ... weirdness in the Pacific Northwest...So, lots of pervs in the Pacific Northwest. And strange laws. I think it must be the rain.
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Actually, I believe (not think) that it has to do with proximity to large bodies of water and the Earth's magnetic declination. Kooks always seem to congregate in huge numbers in cities near oceans, Great Lakes, and large rivers. Declination is the worst on the east and west coasts. The extreme kooks especially seem to be attracted to Pacific coast states, probably because of the moderate weather which makes it far easier to be a kook. Portland area kooks actually seem to be a bit more kookie than San Francisco kooks.

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