House bill would make White House swallow school lunch calorie caps for state dinners

Teabagging Representative Rodney Davis (R) whose district is southwest of Chicago (the baddest part of town...) has the unmitigated GALL to propose a law--A LAW that would limit the meals served at a White House State Dinner to match FLATUS's own school lunch limitations!

Comrades, this TRAVESTY must not go unpunished!

Ever since the days of Caesar, policy was Quod licet Iovi non licet bovi - What Jupiter (supreme God) is allowed to do, cattle (people) are not.

So what if the Obama's dogs eat off of bone china and wear diamonds while the citizens starve? So what if citizens are freezing while for a few hours one evening FLATUS wears a dress worth $12,000 taxpayer dollars (or $35,250 in EBT)? They are not CITIZENS! (OK, she might be, but HE is still questionable...)

Comrades, we must counterattack with swift vengeance. This Representative Davis is obviously racist, and is probably homophobic and a carnivore. <spit> Who does he think he is?

The scary thing is, she's not wearing a bustle.

Oh My Gawd Marx, Comrade Brain, you made me spurt beet juice out my nose!

Good thing it wasn't vodka. Vodka is in short supply around here. Pope Algore says it causes Global Warmink Climate Change and is forbidden (except for Chakra massages of course).

Come on, comrades, I think it's very impressive that the Moooster™ was able to spend only $12,000.00 to get such a delectable black lingerie / blue sheet combo!

...but couldn't afford to get her hair and her nails did?

She should see Congresswoman Shiela Jackson-Lee, she give her the hook-up on a good triple-crown weave for cheap, mmm hmmmm....

Tovarichi wrote: Quoted the quotation "Let them Eat Kale":

You should be more careful with your quotations, Comrade Tovarichi, because you unwittingly inspired a Tea-Partier to mock the First Pets by suggesting the caption, "Let Them Eat Dogs," but I suggest that you fix the problem right away by noting the proper caption for that picture to show our utter disdain for the Tea-Partiers would be, "Let the Dogs Eat Them."

No doubt our First Lady's reknowned nutritional expertise might lead her to offer such dietary advice to all canine pets of True Progressives to thereby help rid us of the slack-jawed tea-partiers who don't even have enough smarts to know they should "eat three veggies a day" as I explained in my confirmation hearing.

So as to not make the First Lady angry at The Cube ...


... we must swiftly condemn all tea-partiers who would enjooy the "Let Them Eat Dogs" caption.

--Kagan Gourmet