In a thread earlier this summer, I referred to the NAACP as the "National Association for the Advancement of Collective Progressivism."

Turns out it wasn't satire after all:

Desperation....The gummint is running out of other people's money and turning to guilt as a means of extraction. "Why do you hate little crippled Johnny - just cause he's poor?" I suppose it's worth a try.

Once again you have proved, you cannot keep a good brain in a jar! You have progressed past yourself!

I fear that this group has taken a most dangerous and foolish stance. I searched and searched and found not a single reference to The New Progressive Bible. Being so reckless could lead some less indoctrinated individual from discovering that the old reactionary Bible also mentioned how those who did not work should not eat. Why, even in the law handed down by Moses, people who owned the harvest fields were required to set aside a tenth to feed the poor, However, the poor had to actually go into these fields and gather their potion themselves! This food was not collected for them and brought to their homes! Clearly this is a message that we cannot afford to be revealed to the People.

Fraulein Frankenfeinstein wrote:Once again you have proved, you cannot keep a good brain in a jar! You have progressed past yourself!

Actually Comrade Frankenfeinstein, you can actually keep a good brain in a jar for quite a long time which I would have thought you above anyone would know. I believe I still have quite a few good brains still preserved just in case....

Marshal Pupovich wrote:

Fraulein Frankenfeinstein wrote:Once again you have proved, you cannot keep a good brain in a jar! You have progressed past yourself!

Actually Comrade Frankenfeinstein, you can actually keep a good brain in a jar for quite a long time which I would have thought you above anyone would know. I believe I still have quite a few good brains still preserved just in case....

Loyal Comrade Pooch... Pup, I have not had success with the keeping of bodily parts, as hard as I've tried. They turn green and smell a bit.... I am thinking the gold fish bowl might be the problem? Or just brain parts.

Carry on!

Fraulein Frankenfeinstein wrote:Loyal Comrade Pooch... Pup, I have not had success with the keeping of bodily parts, as hard as I've tried. They turn green and smell a bit.... I am thinking the gold fish bowl might be the problem? Or just brain parts.

There may be yet another reason for your difficulties. I suggest that you avail yourself to a People's Hidden Camera. You may have some less than forthcoming comrades slipping in at night and taking a nibble of your body parts that have not washed their hands properly resulting in some cross contamination. Good hygiene is very important when dealing with body parts.

Marshal Pupovich wrote:

Fraulein Frankenfeinstein wrote:Loyal Comrade Pooch... Pup, I have not had success with the keeping of bodily parts, as hard as I've tried. They turn green and smell a bit.... I am thinking the gold fish bowl might be the problem? Or just brain parts.

There may be yet another reason for your difficulties. I suggest that you avail yourself to a People's Hidden Camera. You may have some less than forthcoming comrades slipping in at night and taking a nibble of your body parts that have not washed their hands properly resulting in some cross contamination. Good hygiene is very important when dealing with body parts.

Don't play with body parts - cause you never know where they've been.

As an aside, I have always thought the acronym meant the National Association for Acting Crazy and Paranoid. You learn something every day!

Captain Craptek wrote:Don't play with body parts - cause you never know where they've been.

Or what they have been doing.

Marshal Pupovich wrote:I fear that this group has taken a most dangerous and foolish stance. I searched and searched and found not a single reference to The New Progressive Bible.

Comrade Pup. I hesitate to mention it, but a lot has transpired during your (various) absence(s), not the least of which was the release of the new and improved Holy Obama Bible, King Barack Version.

Autographed by King Barackzebub Husseinovich Obama Himself, this Bible obsoletes and supersedes all others.

Marshal Pupovich wrote:

Captain Craptek wrote:Don't play with body parts - cause you never know where they've been.

Or what they have been doing.

and think this is something to contemplate... I was sure the brains would be safe in the goldfish bowl, but that is not the case. I have thusly installed a couple of camera to catch any potencial comrade doing a dirty deed!! Maybe I will leave the newest version of the People Obama Bible as a reminder of who is watching!

Comrade Fraulein, it appears that someone has stolen liberated your newest version of the People's Obama Bible!

R.O.C.K. in the USSA wrote:Comrade Pup. I hesitate to mention it, but a lot has transpired during your (various) absence(s), not the least of which was the release of the new and improved Holy Obama Bible, King Barack Version.

Comrade ROCK, I feel compelled to warn you. I for one will not abandon the Progressive Bible and embrace this King Barak Version that has yet to be embraced by his Holiness Red Square. I fear you are falling for a dangerous heresy. There, I have said it! Remember, this Obama poser came to the People making great promises, promises that we have yet to have fulfilled, and lo, his time is growing short! The Second Coming is growing closer with each day. Soon the Empress, the MTE, the Anointed One, Hillary Clinton, the Cloven Footed Messiah will soon take her rightful throne. I for one have never betrayed her in thought or deed!

Let me remind you before it is too late to save your non-existant soul....

Hillary is my shepherd, I shall not want....

Two voters will enter the booth. One will be taken to re-education camp, the other will receive a new subsidy.

Yes ROCK, the time is coming! Choose carefully who you will serve!

Fraulein Frankenfeinstein wrote:and think this is something to contemplate... I was sure the brains would be safe in the goldfish bowl, but that is not the case. I have thusly installed a couple of camera to catch any potencial comrade doing a dirty deed!! Maybe I will leave the newest version of the People Obama Bible as a reminder of who is watching!

Hmmmm, I would not be shocked to discover Comrade ROCK is the culprit....mighty odd that this comrade would be reporting that your camera has been stolen....as if he knew where to look. But I am probably in error....

Comrade Pup, I am a bit concerned about your lack of (Hope and) Change, including your apparently not realizing that - much like that quaint old "constitution" the Teabaggers are always whining about - the Bible is a living document and subject to change at any time.

In fact, comrade, I worry about your clinging to a specific book - we all know what clinging to a religion/book is a symptom of, don't we? I don't suppose you're hiding a gun or two somewhere too, are you? Hmmm?

It's not too late, Comrade Pup - denounce yourself and renounce this creeping conservatism that seems to have invaded your psyche during your travels (were you, perhaps, in Texas or some other red state for a while?) and move FORWARD!

Marshal Pupovich wrote: Let me remind you before it is too late to save your non-existant soul....

Hillary is my shepherd, I shall not want....

How absolutely glorious.... she is the Old Goat leading the future flock of Obama drones, is she not? And I am thinking we might need the newest, newest updated version of the previous version... just so we'll be updated.

p.s. I must denounce Comrade R.O.C.K. for denouncing most ubber loyal Comrade Pup. (tisk tisk) Our hopey changey has not change but will simply move to the newest of the newer hopey change - Comrade Hillary and Billary. The Oral Office shall be ours again!

R.O.C.K. in the USSA wrote:Comrade Pup, I am a bit concerned about your lack of (Hope and) Change, including your apparently not realizing that - much like that quaint old "constitution" the Teabaggers are always whining about - the Bible is a living document and subject to change at any time.

In fact, comrade, I worry about your clinging to a specific book - we all know what clinging to a religion/book is a symptom of, don't we? I don't suppose you're hiding a gun or two somewhere too, are you? Hmmm?

It's not too late, Comrade Pup - denounce yourself and renounce this creeping conservatism that seems to have invaded your psyche during your travels (were you, perhaps, in Texas or some other red state for a while?) and move FORWARD

Comrade ROCK, I have but offered a bit of warning to those equal enough to hear and make a more equal preparation for the Second Coming. Are you wishing to be Left Behind? Can you show me where the Glorious Prophet Red Square renounce the Progressive Bible? Obama (PBUH) is but a place keeper sent down from above to absorb the Tsunami of Trouble that Bush caused. Obama is but a voice crying in the wilderness to prepare the world for the coming of the Madam Messiah Hillary! Believe me now or believe me later.

As for denouncing myself....As if. If I were to do that you can be sure as a socialist that Commisarka Pinkie would be jumping in here and claiming that I was only seeking for yet another promotion via show trial.

As it is, you may wish to duck as well for Commissarka Pinkie will be swinging her shovel at you for denouncing me for the same reason. Then again, you may also notice that you were denounced in the post by the wise Comrade Frankenfeinstein. Funny how these things work in the collective eh Comrade? I didn't make it to be a Marshall based on my good looks you know?

Perhaps not, Comrade - but I must admit that you do look dashing in that scrambled egg hat!

Speaking of dashing, what do you think of my new R.O.C.K. Sled?

Don't tell the dogs I said so, but most of the energy comes from the hovercat.

i like the apehangers, but don't get me started about your cat beast infestation. You can see the fear in that young child's face as she flees from the flea bitten feline. Oh the humanity.....

Comrade ROCK - Nice change of subject, but what about the show trial? What about the denunciations? Hmmmmmmmmm?

Comrade Squirrel - I am currently unavailable, as I am attending the March on Washington for the next several days months.

I'll have my people talk to your people.

Captain Craptek wrote:Comrade ROCK - Nice change of subject, but what about the show trial? What about the denunciations? Hmmmmmmmmm?

Please Comrade, if you are referring to me by chance, I ask you to read what I said earlier. If Commissarka Pinkie hears even a hint regarding denouncing me or putting me on a Show Trial, she will be here thwacking me with her Golden Shovel in the errant belief that I was seeking this great honor, and thwacking Comrade ROCK for encouraging this. And given your post, I would not be surprised if she went after you even more so.

Please listen to what I say....

Comrade Pupovich,

Do you take me for a rube, sir? I didn't just fall out of the hay loft yesterday! (And I know the voice of Red Rooster when I hear it!)

Captain Craptek wrote:Do you take me for a rube, sir? I didn't just fall out of the hay loft yesterday! (And I know the voice of Red Rooster when I hear it!)

I suspect that the most honorable (snicker) Comrade Red Rooster might differ with you, surely you are not confusing us?

Regardless Captain, as a more equal equal I have a responsibility here ...

Marshal Pupovich wrote:

Captain Craptek wrote:Do you take me for a rube, sir? I didn't just fall out of the hay loft yesterday! (And I know the voice of Red Rooster when I hear it!)

I suspect that the most honorable (snicker) Comrade Red Rooster might differ with you, surely you are not confusing us?

Regardless Captain, as a more equal equal I have a responsibility here ...

Ah, Comrade Pupovich, your beyond equal duties are dutifully noted and secure with me. However, I feel it my duty to inform you of a certain audio recording I have tucked away for just such an occasion. I hope I won't find it necessary to send it along to Red Rooster.

Oh, and once again you are trying to fool the old Captain - a near impossibility I might add - with false voices of bravado. This time from our dear Comrade Yosemite Sam. As a long time member of "The Society of Irrelevant Cartoon Kapers" (SICK) I advise against it.

Yours Truly, (recording in paw)

Captain Craptek

Captain Craptek wrote:Ah, Comrade Pupovich, your beyond equal duties are dutifully noted and secure with me. However, I feel it my duty to inform you of a certain audio recording I have tucked away for just such an occasion. I hope I won't find it necessary to send it along to Red Rooster.

Oh, and once again you are trying to fool the old Captain - a near impossibility I might add - with false voices of bravado. This time from our dear Comrade Yosemite Sam. As a long time member of "The Society of Irrelevant Cartoon Kapers" (SICK) I advise against it.

Comrade Captain, What do I say to this?

I can see clearly how you have earned those Captain bars. No doubt in many bars throughout the collective.

Thank you Comrade Pupovich, for reminding me of an urgent need to replenish my precious bodily fluids.