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Minitruth Flash: Fed Prompts Newspeak Dollar Synonym Notice

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For Immediate Release and Dissemination;

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Fed hooked on QE "through 2014"

With the news that the Federal Reserve will continue quantitative easing "through 2014" the Obama Administration has issued a flurry of executive directives specific to Newspeak.

According to its mandate as purveyor of language and correct understanding; Minitruth systematically installs the following synonyms for the word "dollar".

These synonyms will go into effect staggered across a chronological schedule. The synonyms will be compounding and irrevocable. In some instances the synonym "dollar" may replace the primary descriptor for the given place, person, item or thing given.

Considering our charter with respect to the maintenance of Newspeak we expect the Inner Party to promote these changes with revolutionary zeal.

Given most of our work is subtraction-based, this directive has established one of the largest expansions of the Newspeak Thesaurus in our glorious history! (Until of course "dollar" replaces the primary descriptor)

Present - 2014

Dollar = Fifty Cents

Ex. - Can I borrow a dollar to get a Coke?

2015

Dollar = Dog Doo Disposable Glove

Ex. - Our dog, Trotsky, dropped a Cheney in the kulaks yard. If you have a dollar handy I'll put it on his porch.

2016

Dollar = Paper Towel

Ex. - Little Pol has spilled his cabbage water. Hand me a dollar to clean it up.

2017

Dollar = Coffee Filter

Ex. - I went to the woods and gathered and ground these acorns. Do you have a dollar so I can make us a brew?

2018

Dollar = Kindling

Ex. - Acorn water is best when warm. If you have a dollar I can heat our cans.

2019

Dollar = Piece of Gravel

Ex. - With centralized control of production even proles working in the government slag pit make billions and billions of dollars!


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End transmission.

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Excellent work Comrade. Might I also suggest that dollar may soon also refer to a plaything for The Children ™ ?

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Dollar = The finest tiny suits for mice.

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[color=#C0392B]INGSOC[/color] could have included squirrels when he wrote:Dollar = The finest tiny suits for mice.
Some folks dress like a million bucks...
some dress like a buck.
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[color=#C0392B]Captain Craptek[/color] was pulling a Walter Mitty when he wrote:Reminds me of my biker days...
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Do you remember when you used to open for Congressman Grayson's comedy show?
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