President Barack Obama's 2012 campaign video on the one-year anniversary of the killing of Usama bin Laden (a.k.a. Osama bin Laden) touts his order for the Navy SEALS to kill bin Laden and implies Mitt Romney would not have issued such order, but the campaign video failed to include the now-famous quotation of Usama's Last Words a.k.a. Osama's Last Words (as he saw a Navy SEAL taking aim at him): "I'd Rather be Waterboarded."

Also not reported is that as the Navy SEAL pulled the trigger, he said (in response to Usama's Last Words): "Don't forget to explain to the 72 virgins that if it were not for Khalid Sheik Mohammed having been waterboarded (under supervision of Jose Rodriguez, Jr. by authorization from Bush 43), we would never have learned the clues that were essential to our finding you here tonight-- i.e., if Jose Rodriguez, Jr., were not to have passed the football, Obama would never have an opportunity to do an end-zone dance to celebrate your demise."


No doubt President Obama will soon rectify this to "do the honorable thing" by ordering that his campaign staff revise that campaign video to include a segment in which Obama will thank Rodriguez for having passed that football to him.

--KOOK

Dear Leader: Me big shot! Sneak in to country, stand on hill and thump my chest! Well, cute boys, it's nearly morning daylight! Let's get back on Airforce One before they scare the S**t out of me like Herman Cain did before we neutralized him!

AND we held the anchovies - which is to say, Herman's not sleeping with the fishes.

But the good news is that now that he's (still) dead, Usama can now vote many times for Dear Leader!

Our brave (and violent) President.