As it becomes increasingly obvious that Barack Obama is only appointing Clintonite associates to positions of power in his New Order, people hoping for Change™ are disappointed.
In response to their disappointment, Barack Obama exclaimed, “I am the change! I am the change!”
Barack Obama expressed his shock that former supporters would forget that he is in fact the actual physical embodiment of Change™.
“My middle name is Change™,” Obama explained with a smug chuckle when reporters pressed him on his recent choice in appointees. “The amazing thing about me is that, as Change™ Incarnate, I can work with anyone or anything to affect change. In fact, I have recently considered appointing toasters and other household appliances to the “advisor” positions in my Cabinet, since obviously, as the smartest and most Changeful person on this planet, having human advisors would just get annoying. And anyway, household appliances should have a part in my New Order. Why should we discriminate against the inanimate members of our society?”
Still, the promise of indiscriminately celebrating household appliances and other underrepresented members of society has done nothing to placate Far Left former Obama supporters.
“Doesn’t Obama know that there are more important issues at stake here?” a medical marijuana activist asked at a recent protest of Obama’s decisions. “It’s nice that he is championing appliance rights, but there are drugs that are still illegal! What is he doing about that?”
“I have to say, I’m glad that someone at the top is finally looking out for the involuntarily silent in our country. Household appliances have always gotten the worst of it. But personally, I have to wonder: what will a dishwasher do in the quest to raise taxes, kill infants, and destroy the upper class? I’m not convinced that Obama has thoroughly thought through these decisions,” a MoveOn.org fanatic said.
Obama says that his disappointed supporters just need to trust him more.
“Peace is the absence of opposition to Obama,” he said, surprisingly referring to himself in the third person. “Once my supporters can let go of their fears and embrace trust instead, I can prove I am the Change™ they’ve been hoping for.”
A moving work! But I did want to question you about one thing. As The One and we his devoted followers repeatedly intone Change™ for its own sake, some of us become very excited, like "holy rollers," stuttering, stumbling through our chants. This leads to some comrades calling not for Change™ but for Ch-ch-ch-changes™. Thus my question: Must such comrades pay royalties to David Bowie?
"Why should we discriminate against the inanimate members of our society?”
Thinking this should be forwarded to proper party legal channels like ACLU. Discrimination against the Inanimate has gone on far too long.
Obama's willingness to "change" has given many a sense of "hope".Others may feel betrayed. The one thing we can all count on is the fact that Dear Leader is so marvelously ignorant of everything. He has a childlike innocence. Utterly unburdened by knowledge of economics, foreign or domestic issues. Unfettered by the facts as he is, we can trust that he will rule in a manner not seen since Mao.
The Obamessiah has dragged out the StormTruthers(tm) to push his Economic Stimulus Plan.
There's no doubt that with all this help that the Rethuglikkans don't stand a chance of holding back the "Red Tide" of Socialism. Booyeh!
But Mr. Obama’s team will still be able to call on Washington’s partisan political machinery if necessary.
Brad Woodhouse, who was a senior Democratic Party strategist in the campaign, has assembled a group of 25 organizations — including unions like the American Federation of State, County and Municipal Employees and grass-roots groups like MoveOn.org and Acorn — to build public and Congressional support for Mr. Obama’s economic package.
Mr. Woodhouse said the group was in the process of raising money for television advertisements that would pressure local lawmakers to support the plan. He said he had consulted with several of Mr. Obama’s senior strategists.
“We’re doing this with the notion,” Mr. Woodhouse said, “that if we can help in any way, even at the margins, to make this any easier on Obama, it will preserve some of his political capital.”(?) huh?