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Obama Meets Stuart Smalley

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ImageComrades, I would dearly love to take full credit for the following, but alas I can only take credit for confiscating this. This could have come straight from the Cube, but to avoid lawyers etc, all I shall do is post the picture that is no longer showing at the site, and provide the link. For those of you who missed it.... this is the image that greeted me when I investigated rumors of conservatism at Fox News today.... and the story that it was linked to.

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John Wayne, Meet Stuart Smalley -- Obama Team Strikes Special Diplomatic Tone: While former President George W. Bush drew charges of "cowboy diplomacy" for his unilateral style of doing things, the Obama team might just be Stuart Smalley to Bush's John Wayne.

"All I have to do is be the best Obama I can be."


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Yes the Ebil Fox Network speaks of People Hero Janet "Crappy Nappy" Napolitano, who says that the Great Peoples Liberators and Heroes should not be referred to as "Terrorist" but rather "Misunderstood Sweet lovable Muslims" and the destruction they cause should be referred to as "Man Made Disasters". The great peoples world of next Tuesday is moving along smoothly. Praise be to Chairman Zero...errrr I mean the Obamessiah.

Commissar Red Star CEO Hemlock Hospitality INC
Director of Kicking Doors at Midnight
Keeper of the sacred Plasma Cutter
Herdsman of Rainbow Farting Unicorns
Keeper of the Faith

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I can just imagine President Franklin D. Obama standing before Congress and saying "Yesterday, December 7, 1941, the Japanese did something really rude and should apologize for it."

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I hate to say this, but you have to give some credit to the evil Fox News, that could have come from the brilliant minds here! In fact, I believe an investigation is needed to determine why Fox News was able to abscond with that story before the Collective genius that is the Cube.

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Let's all go on Oprah and sort it out. We can make air kisses and tell each other how wonderful we really are. While we're doing that ACORN can be doing the dirty work.

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Wonderful idea Kind and Generous Leader, we go on Oprah, Yack about some pathetic book no one otherwise would ever even hear about, also hear about a pathetic political candidate who should have never left community organizing.

Yes I can see it now, we could all watch Bruno and Oprah "Yuck" it up about some inane, esoteric topic, all the while the audience, full of pork filled winches, that have forced there cloven hooves in to pumps, or left wing uglies in "Berkingstocks", all look on with "Fawning Ah".

Yes Commissar, we can allow Acorn do their worst, also look over the Messiahs new version of the "SS" and the "Hittler Obama Youth"they can warm up.

The Glorious world of Next Tuesday is here!!!! " Please Excuse me my leg is tingling" (I ether just stabbed myself with a letter opener, or fluffy the cat just relived his-self"


Commissar Red Star CEO Hemlock HospitalityäINC
Director of Kicking Doors at Midnight
Keeper of the sacred Plasma Cutter
Herdsman of Rainbow Farting Unicorns
Keeper of the Faith

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Red Star, you have expanded wonderfully on the Oprah idea.

I think that we ought to apply for NEA funding for that Oprah show. Once I was in a bookstore and at the checkout counter there was a kiosk of books on Oprah's reading list. I asked why have them when the audience couldn't read? There was no answer.

But the major thing is that Bruno's conversation would actually seem like a college degree. Just don't distract him with a rhinestone or a bit of shiny tin-foil.

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Marshal Pupovich wrote:I hate to say this, but you have to give some credit to the evil Fox News, that could have come from the brilliant minds here! In fact, I believe an investigation is needed to determine why Fox News was able to abscond with that story before the Collective genius that is the Cube.

Unfortunately, this brilliant satire may backfire. After the UnPresident's 10 years in office, the Dems may take the hint and nominate Al Franken in his Stuart Smalley guise as their next standard bearer. Given the way things are going, he would probably win.

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Comrades,

I will defer to collective opinion that this is a glorious linked article, but something has gone wrong with me to where I uncontrollably hit reset, channel change, OFF, eject, or bystanders when the words "Saturday Night Live" intrude on my existence. I read to those words then--bang!--close window. I could not help myself.

My suspicion is that only a liberal showering of air kisses will cure me: "Bring 'em on!" I'm metrosexual enough to critique anything you shower upon me.

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Tovarich, I do take your point. In 1979 I was in a motel room in Bay City, Texas, and we were watching SNL. Their musical act was Leon Redbone, and I thought what a great satire. Then the audience howled its approval. That was the last time that I saw it.

Opiate, the trend that I see is that the next Democrat nominee for president may well be Captain Crunch. Not the Cube beast but the real one. Or the Cube beast. Or it could be the Mime. Or it could be Peter Pan and I'm not talking Bonnie Fwank.

Bullwinkle? No, he's better than that.

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Commissar Theocritus wrote:I think that we ought to apply for NEA funding for that Oprah show. Once I was in a bookstore and at the checkout counter there was a kiosk of books on Oprah's reading list. I asked why have them when the audience couldn't read? There was no answer.

Theo, I missed this. I am still laughing and will probably suffer flashbacks of snickering the rest of the day due to it.

Was it a Border's, by any chance?

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Barnes and Noble. Once I wrote the editorial-page editor of the San Angelo, Texas, paper. It's owned by a pink chain. They have, or had, an answering machine for letters to the editor. I wrote asking the same thing: "Why do you publish spoken comments from people who have just proven that they cannot read?" I got a letter back in which I could hear him laughing, but he said, "We think it's important that the people be heard."

As they consistently pushed a moonbat agenda in one of the most conservative towns in Texas. I've convinced several people to cancel their subscription and last I heard they were in trouble. Not from me solely of course, but every subscription to a moonbat paper cancelled, every MSM program not watched, every letter to an advertiser blasting them for green nonsense, is a small battle.

I wrote Suburu when they had those commercials about how green their plant was. "Do the cars work?"

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"Our insatiable demand for illegal drugs fuels the drug trade," Hillary Clinton said. "Our inability to prevent weapons from being illegally smuggled across the border to arm these criminals causes the deaths of police officers, soldiers and civilians."

Brother-in-law Roger, Husband Bill, Marion Berry, Craig Livingstone and Hamilton Jordan could not be reached for comments at the Hoover Vacuum Testing Facilities.

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Ahh yes all those FULL AUTO rifles and GRENADES bought at gun shows and gun shops. I wish the gun shops where I live were as well stocked with such items that could be simply bought off the shelf.

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Commissar Theocritus wrote: As they consistently pushed a moonbat agenda in one of the most conservative towns in Texas. I've convinced several people to cancel their subscription and last I heard they were in trouble. Not from me solely of course, but every subscription to a moonbat paper cancelled, every MSM program not watched, every letter to an advertiser blasting them for green nonsense, is a small battle.

It is probably a coincidence that a Kleptocrat Democrat Senator from the People's Little Barackistan Republic of Maryland has introduced a bill to "save" our precious newspapers by allowing them to become dead tree versions of PBS:

Cardin's Newspaper Revitalization Act would allow newspapers to operate as nonprofits for educational purposes under the U.S. tax code, giving them a similar status to public broadcasting companies.

"Educational purposes"? A large bit of irony, there. True, it should serve as an education for the masses as to what kind of shit you get when you let leftwing idiots run things without any meaningful competetion. This education is likely not the one that was intended. But I guess if the lesson hasn't sunk in yet after GM et al, the propping up of the local leftist agitprop rag is not going to have much of an effect. Still, at some point one would think the camel's back would be on the edge of breaking, especially since so many workers in "unimportant" industries are losing their jobs. I wonder if this could become a kind of "Atlas Shrugged" scenario in reverse; at some point, the congressional pinheads may be backed into a corner where they will either be forced to subsidize EVERYBODY or else back off entirely and let the markets work again. Unintended consequences, do your stuff.

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Laika the Space Dog wrote:"Our insatiable demand for illegal drugs fuels the drug trade," Hillary Clinton said. "Our inability to prevent weapons from being illegally smuggled across the border to arm these criminals causes the deaths of police officers, soldiers and civilians."

Brother-in-law Roger, Husband Bill, Marion Berry, Craig Livingstone and Hamilton Jordan could not be reached for comments at the Hoover Vacuum Testing Facilities.

Hahahahaha! It's a shame that the scumbag MSM doesn't do its job anymore because there is so much ironic humor that people are missing out on. I gotta wonder if Hillary herself realizes how funny she is. If this story is true, she may have topped herself with this one:

Mexico City, Mexico, Mar 27, 2009 / 04:59 pm (CNA).- During her recent visit to Mexico, U.S. Secretary of State Hillary Clinton made an unexpected stop at the Basilica of Our Lady of Guadalupe and left a bouquet of white flowers “on behalf of the American people,” after asking who painted the famous image.

The image of Our Lady of Guadalupe was miraculously imprinted by Mary on the tilma, or cloak, of St. Juan Diego in 1531. The image has numerous unexplainable phenomena, such as the appearance on Mary's eyes of those present in the room when the tilma was opened and the image's lack of decay.

Mrs. Clinton was received on Thursday at 8:15 a.m. by the rector of the Basilica, Msgr. Diego Monroy.

Msgr. Monroy took Mrs. Clinton to the famous image of Our Lady of Guadalupe, which had been previously lowered from its usual altar for the occasion.

After observing it for a while, Mrs. Clinton asked “who painted it?” to which Msgr. Monroy responded “God!”

http://www.catholicnewsagency.com/new.php?n=15511

Damn, I'm so glad those stupid Bush people aren't representing us in the world anymore.

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If you go to the Basilica you'll see two churches: the old one, nice, pretty, small, on top of a hill. The new one--big, ugly--is where the current services are held. Penitents come from all over Mexico and as soon as they get inside the iron gates drop to their knees to continue the journey.

Our Many Titted Empress of course knows that they are on their knees to pay obeisance to her in her cellulite-ridden magnificence.

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Commissar Theocritus wrote:Our Many Titted Empress of course knows that they are on their knees to pay obeisance to her in her cellulite-ridden magnificence.

I would give my beat ration (then allocate to myself another's) to see TME timewarped to '70s terrycloth tube-tops, banana hair clips, and cutoff jeans. Then again, after witnessing such a sight, I'd probably not want that beat ration or else "refund" it.

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Obamissar 7.62 wrote:Ahh yes all those FULL AUTO rifles and GRENADES bought at gun shows and gun shops. I wish the gun shops where I live were as well stocked with such items that could be simply bought off the shelf.

I'm waiting for the restriction on the sale of replacement parts to stop that mass underground market of Americans assembling full-auto weapons from accumulated spare pieces and using their high-end machining equipment to carve up receiver tubes (from designs that need to be banned as well), just to sell to Mexican drug gangs.

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Commissar Theocritus wrote: Our Many Titted Empress of course knows that they are on their knees to pay obeisance to her in her cellulite-ridden magnificence.


Imagine the smackdown that would occur if someone were to accuse her of attempting to smuggle cottage cheese into the country. And now, I must go to the liquor store and see what they have to help me clear the image from my mind. Where's that overcharge "reset" button.....

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I DENOUNCE Opiate of The People! ARRR!!! Now I too must visit the liquor store. Is this some sort of underhanded effort at stimulating the economy?

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Gentlemen, gentlemen! Oh you commissars of weak stomach. More than once here at the Rancho de Rio Grande I have woken after a party to find Bruno playing miniature golf with a marble on the cellulite-ridden ass of our Many Titted Empress.

"Look, Theocritus!" he trilled. "I made 18 holes in one on her left buttock alone!"

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Weak stomachs indeed Commissar. The exploits of the Chairman would be enough to make these Commissars faint much less the debauchery witnessed at the Rancho de Rio Grande, particularly back in those days that never happened, the days when others actually thought the Empress was going to lead the Party. Thank Lenin we never fell for that eh Commissar?

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Ah, Pupovich, these days I do feel for our Many Titted Empress.

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Ever since SOBama managed to show the world that he's a gutless wonder, sunk entirely into his own worship of himself, except when playing with OPM and OPL, and since Iran and Russia and China have given us the finger, all owing to his touchy-feely solipsistic bullshit, dear Hillary has been shuttling round the world, cut off at the knees. I never thought that I'd feel sorry for that castrating bitch, nor that I'd think of her as an extension of the US.

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ImageWell to be fair, where else would the Empress be more appropriate for than the State Dept? It was already in the hands of those who do all they can do to tear this country down, as has been the case since before Alger Hiss.

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Pupovich! As we know, State and the CIA both were the only things which kept the Bu$hitler from destroying the world and making the sun go black, and the moon fall out of the sky into a lake of molten peanut butter.

They understood that it is the function of the president to listen to them instead of them carrying out the policies of the elected president. We all know that democracy is a dangerous thing and should be circumvented by the likes of State and the CIA.

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It is a glorious day at the State Dept, We have made good fast friends with Comrade Chavez again, opening new doors to Comrade Castro, and even discussing how to go back to the seventies in arms reduction!

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Ah yes, Pupovich. I am currently installing subway turnstiles on the Rancho de Rio Grande. Why bother with those silly cards?

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Perhaps instead of turnstiles, you may find it more efficient to install some sort of Quick Pass system?

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I don't care what the system is as long as I get my cut. Goons taking bribes is just fine with me.

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But who is going to watch the goons to make sure you are getting your fair share of the cut? Ah, never mind Commissar, I shall take responsibility for this, consider it done!

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Just make sure that they cut is not delivered by your talent-shitting pigeons.


 
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