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Pamalinsky's Breakdown

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Comrades, it is with sadness that I report the sickness of our dear sister-in-revolution, Pamalinsky. Last night the doorbell rang and as usual Bruno ran to it as though it were 70% off in Nieman's. He opened the door and caught a body which started to fall inside the Rancho.

"Pamalinsky!" I cried, running over to her. "What happened? You look as though Nanski Peloski were defeated and new Venona files were discovered which implicated the entire Democratic party of the 40s!"

"Theocritus!" this strange and broken creature sobbed, as she put her head on my chest. "I can't take it. I just can't take it any more."

"Tell me. Tell me what happened!"

"I was dozing in my chair in front of the television and my cat, Hopeychangey, must have stepped on the remote control. I would never have my television tuned to Faux Noise.

"I was dozing and hearing this man. This loud man. This man who was called Beck. Something Beck. He was talking about health-care reform and he was using numbers! Theocritus, he was using numbers!"

"Be still, Pamalinsky. I know it's hard, the first time that a made prog gets confronted with numbers."

"I can't take it, Theocritus! I don't like numbers. I don't like things that aren't impressed by my rage. I don't like things which just don't care about me. I don't like gravity if I gained a few pounds over Winter Solstice Holiday. I don't like it when the ATM won't give me my money just because I'm overdrawn..."

"Pamalinsky!" I interjected, horrified. "Do you mean to tell me that no one has taught you, a made prog, how to use OPM? Why on earth would you ever need an ATM card for your own bank account when you ought to have a government job and use the bank accounts of 300,000,000 people?"

"Theocritus!" she cried. "I'm new to this. Help me to understand how to be a better made prog. I look to you as being the most venal, vicious, nasty, larcenous, self-righteous, entitled, and bloodthirsty waste of human DNA that I've ever seen..."

"Pamalinsky, you're making me blush."

"No, I mean it. Due credit where credit's due. But just help me to be as awful as you are. Help me, Theocritus, to rise one rung in the Nanski Ladder."

"Pamalinsky, I'm here for you, of course. You can stay here as long as you want. As long as you have luggage or a deposit."

"Thank you, Theocritus! Thank you!"

"And I promise you that this is the most progified house in the USSA. No numbers here. Not a single one to argue with. Just good old-fashioned feelings and not a single number.

"Except of course for when Bruno's practicing 'Tico Tico.'"

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*Sniff*, *Sniff*, you make this time traveler proud to know such a noble comrade as yourself Comrade Theo. (You don't want your handkerchief back now, after I blew my nose on it do you? Silk too, although the initials on it don't match yours. Oh well....) Taking in a poor, wayward prog like Pamalinksky in her darkest hour of need. (Are those hors d'oeuvres? Do you have a takeout box too?) Such a caring, selfless act of true progressive compassion (you got her credit card, right?). Truly the spirit of progressive belief flows through you. (Damnit Bruno STOP HUMPING MY LEG! I don't swing that way! No, don't bring Pelosi over in her thong, NO, DAMN YOU BRUNO! BACK! BACK I SAY!!)

Anyway you are a fine example of (You don't care if I dump Bruno in a wormhole and send him to J. Edgar Hooover's office, circa 1941 do you?) of what a true Made Progressive is Theo. My hat is off to you. Actually Bruno put a fruit salad on it and is wearing it. But he can keep it, I found it under Pinkie's bed after she and Pupovich left. Amazing what you can find with wormholes these days...

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Poor Pammie! I had grave concerns for her thought presses yesterday (why didn't someone say there was a Party?! Are those fried beets?) I am so relieved you, dear Theo, were there with a helping hand .... and vodka. (being inebriated is so underrated, is it not?) Beck is enough to drive anyone over the edge (wasn't he good yesterday, with all those T-shirts he was sending to SEIU?!). So vile and full of lies and distortions about great Leader and his beloved communist servants staff. (with more notification, next time I could bring granny's recipe for homemade beet strudel)
Stay strong, Comradess Pamalinsky, there is "hope" on the way! (HelpingObamaPartEarly)
. . . and have another vodka.

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7.62, if you can find a wormhole big enough for Bruno, I'll help you shoehorn him into it. In fact perhaps you could help me do the same thing. And don't worry about him humping your leg. He does that to fine leathers, well stuffed cushions, and once I actually found him humping one of Nanski's flasks of blood. It was still warm from the Republican girl that she took it from. Even Nanski didn't want that flagon of blood back.

Fraulein, I hope that if you too run afoul of some monster like Beck or Steyn that you two will remember that you have a home at the Rancho. A home for victims of popular right-wing media types.

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Thank you dearly, Comrade Theo. On occasion, I find the TV in the gulag, subversivedly tuned into Faux News. As distressing as that is (I can't understand how everyone does fawn over Olberblubber Olberman) after a couple of the Peoples Vodka, I find myself able to tune out the capitalist rants.

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This is distressing news indeed. That poor girl. I bet the shock knocked her right off her menstrual cycle. This calls for heroic measures.

I'm not a doctor but I used to play one during the war. I'd recommend plenty of garlic and warm beet juice poultices applied 3 times a day. If that doesn't bring her around, we may have to resort to leeches applied to her heaving bosom.

Send Bruno down to the local pharmacist for some Paregoric and a strong purgative and dose her with that as well. In cases like this you can't be too conservative (spit).

It may be necessary to induce "hysterical paroxysm" so have a vibrator handy.

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Wow Comrades! You guys act FAST!

I mean, if it weren't for Theo taking me in at the Rancho last night I, I, well, I just can't bear to think about that! (Hmmm, that sounds like an improvement!)

"Theo, why do I have this empty feeling in my head? You slipped another Jifi-Lobo in my vodka last night, didn't you? Was it while Bruno was holding me down after my fall into the Rancho? Or, was it while I was projectile vomiting on your gorgeous oriental? Whatever. All I "know" is, something was definitely happening!"

It's a good thing I had my little brown bottle of Ipecac handy. (I got it on the big black market and carry it with me at all times to purge myself of the poison I just can't seem to…er...purge) But it wouldn't have been nearly as effective without your generous addition of organic free-rancho egg whites, burnt toast and Grey Poupon. You can send the cleaning bill to the Collective. I know they will take care of it. You might want to mark it up a couple-a-trillion bit, just in case.

And, Theo, I especially want to thank you for putting taking the words right out in of my mouth!

A stunning display of compassion!

I will give my little snow leopard, Hopeychangey a good talkin' to about stepping on the remote. (That always works!)

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Truly, a wonder party progressive thought gathering . . or that's what I was told. I spent way too much time kissing the floor in the back bathroom (what a pity it's not actually INSIDE the Rancho). I did snap one photo as I was falling onto the linoleum.

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Blink! Blink! Blink!..........I'm coming out of my haze now, after last night's fête at the Rancho...... GASP!!!! Is that ME during my sound off!? When I was trying to impress everyone so I can get a promotion? Gawd, I do look scary, don't I. Reminds me of one of my many idols, the B Boxer Babe. Friends tell me I look just like her when I sound off. I literally turn into another person. I am very proud of this, in my humble little prog sort of way. Maybe NOW I'll start getting some RESPECT around here! I've worked really HARD for that! (I just love it when everyone is groping for me! I mean that in the figurative sense, of course.)

Hey, thanks for the promo, Fraulein, this could go viral! (and get me re-elected as a bonus!)

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I must say, dearest comrade Pamalinsky.... youz one hot babe. I'm not sure who the dork is picking his teeth, but I believe it might be that Bruno I keep hearing about? Wonder who the numchuck is to your left... NO MORE VODKA for him! And Czar Czar seems to have hit the wall too . . . wow, what a party.

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Fraulein Pulloskies wrote:I must say, dearest comrade Pamalinsky.... youz one hot babe. I'm not sure who the dork is picking his teeth, but I believe it might be that Bruno I keep hearing about? Wonder who the numchuck is to your left... NO MORE VODKA for him! And Czar Czar seems to have hit the wall too . . . wow, what a party.


Hey, thanks, Dear Fraulein, you flatter me and make me blush, but I am worried about one thing. Theo's WATER BILL. After this latest gathering at the Rancho, it looks like his bill will necessarily skyrocket. (The One warned us about this just to be fair.) Even with water rationing and all, Theo will still need to hose down his entire dacha! He is very fussy about these things. Theo likes a clean dacha. And, from what I heard, that means a good hosin' inside AND out! (Those progs in that picture, myself included, look like they could use a good hosin', too. But, that's another story.)

Wait a minute! I forgot! THEO IS VERY WELL-CONNECTED! This, I now realize, is what he meant when he referred to himself as being well hung. Ha! Some euphemism! That Theo is some trickster when it comes to words! He's got that water bill covered alright! All that worry for nothing. Whew!

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Pamalinsky wrote:
Wait a minute! I forgot! THEO IS VERY WELL-CONNECTED! This, I now realize, is what he meant when he referred to himself as being well hung. Ha! Some euphemism! That Theo is some trickster when it comes to words! He's got that water bill covered alright! All that worry for nothing. Whew!

You're most thanked in return . . . that was some whale of a PAR-TA. He should do it again, once Comrade Theo get outs of the gulag.

I wouldn't put too much stock in his reference to being well hung. Men love to exaggerate their hungness and such. He probably doesn't know great leader at all. . . but, if his water bill is lowered, like the Cong. in "Cali- for- i -ia" (lol silly actor!) received from their "deal" with the great One, then he might be more hung than we knew.

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Hey, I've been stuck petting Theo's cats, Calvin and Hobbes all night while the rest of you party away. You think Bruno is trouble? Calvin is mad at me for not letting him back into the main house, and Hobbes is doing cartwheels all over the room. When will it be safe for them to return? Inquiring cat minds want to know.

Comrade Pamalinski,

Feeling better?

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Leninka wrote:Hey, I've been stuck petting Theo's cats, Calvin and Hobbes all night while the rest of you party away. You think Bruno is trouble? Calvin is mad at me for not letting him back into the main house, and Hobbes is doing cartwheels all over the room. When will it be safe for them to return? Inquiring cat minds want to know.

Comrade Pamalinski,

Feeling better?


Most definitely feeling better, dear Leninka. Thank you for asking. Wow! For a second there I thought you said you were petting Bruno! My understanding is that Bruno is ALWAYS in trouble.
Last I heard, Theo was arranging to have his dacha totally hosed down! It was a mess! Inside and out! You know how fussy he is about that. It was some party, let me tell you! It even rolled out onto the north forty, including the "bathroom" just behind his dacha. I heard there were some impalings, don't know for sure, because I had this "empty" feeling in my head. I think Theo slipped an extra Jiffi-Lobo in my vodka, just for good measure. Or, maybe Bruno did it, incurring Theo's wrath. At this point, I am clueless, and try to not ask too many questions.

I believe he is at the local Fire Dept. as we speak. A good 40 miles down the road as the Jim Crow flies. With all the water rationing going on though, I'm sure he is having to make "special arrangements." Which, you know, might take a little extra time.

Other than that, I could safely say it's safe to return. No one answers the phone there. You might want to wait until the place is hosed. Whenever that might be. Cats really hate water. Up to you, though.

Hope you can find the time to check out all the traffic on this thread. All started by Casserole Czar's first post! Amazing! You must be so proud! It was a real traffic jam! And, quite an emotional ride, too!

Good luck finding Theo!

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Pamalinski,

I veritably believe you may be Comrade Theocritus's long lost twin. Or daughter? Tell the truth Comrade Theocritus! Are you now, or have you ever been involved in a heterosexual liaison?

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What an interesting theory, Leninka! I do believe it's possible Theocritus and Pamalinsky are twins separated at birth, and why? Because their father, once a promising made Prog, was lured to the dark side, the Evil Empire of capitalism that destroys whole planets and galaxies and systems. Theo and Pam had to be brought up separately to keep them safe from the Empire--Theocritus at the Rancho del Rio Grande, out in the desert middle of nowhere, far from civilization save the cantina in nearby Pecos; and Pamalinsky in some faraway planet that's since been destroyed and is all in a shambles now--California seems to fit the description--until such time as they were ready to take on the Empire and bring it down, either by DIY impeachment or reconciliation or deem and pass, or maybe even building a tent city somewhere.

As for the identity of their father--a man once on the Left, before he defected to the Right--oh dear me! Could their father be--choke--Ronald Reagan?

Only who was their mother?

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Could it be? I mean, at least Theocritus takes after her a little, don't you think?

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Fraulein Pulloskies wrote:I must say, dearest comrade Pamalinsky.... youz one hot babe. I'm not sure who the dork is picking his teeth, but I believe it might be that Bruno I keep hearing about? Wonder who the numchuck is to your left... NO MORE VODKA for him! And Czar Czar seems to have hit the wall too . . . wow, what a party.

Sh*t, that was some party!! I always apreciate a good, firm breast when I'm a little dizzy.

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=======================Message Deleted By Politburo====================

Comrade Pamalinski,

You cannot pick your nose with your shoe, this is a fact, unless it is a stiletto! Or of course, you use a shoe lace, and string it through one nostril and out the other.


- Supreme Commander of Thread Jacking and Stuffed Mice Toys(TM)


=====================End Top Secret Message By Politburo=================

Thank you, most beloved - Supreme Commander of Thread Jacking and Stuffed Mice Toys™ I, Pamalinsky, am so relieved!

I really love you guys! And am working on a new project that I never dreamed I would do as we speak! I'm so inspired by the Cube. I can't even believe, myself, some of the stuff I have come up with spontaneously. In fact, the spontaneous aspect of it is what makes it all happen! I believe that was Oleg's original intention. I'm not kissing ass here, I just recently found this out by Googling the Cube itself that this was his intention from the "get-go". I've been discovering new (and better) ways of saying what I have to say since the very day I enrolled! WAY before I read Oleg's intention. This is working in my life in ways I never imagined. But, I sensed it the day I enrolled. I don't want to lose it!

Please! Make sure no Mofo messes with my messages! Or, yours!!!

Your devoted virgin prog, Pamalinsky


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Obamugabe wrote:NOTHING!

As your newest, and most devoted friend, my esteemed, Obamugabe, your gonna have some HELL to pay about posting a "Wordless Video" on this site. This hell is gonna come from Leninka! And, she doesn't mess around with this wordless video thing.

Gosh, Obamugube, you already know this! What am I, Pamalinsky, supposed to do to show my loyalty to you? Especially now that I have Leninka on my side?

Jeesh. Okay, I'll give it a try on your behalf. Ahem, from this video I'm supposed to discern that you are on my side and you perceive all the subtleties of my plight? Are you kidding me? All I saw was a pissing contest! I don't know if you're on my side or not! It's well, Sir, quite ambiguous! Please explain!

p.s. I actually think I do get it but, we must appease Leninka. (Just covering your back, Sir)
Awehtu, by the way.


3/21/10 2:43 am
Took another look at this video, Obamugabe. It's friggin' hilarious and pretty much sums up the comments on this thread. In a nutshell! It's TWOO! It's TWOO!

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Pamalinsky:

Obamugabe is in Cubepliance.

It is perfectly permissible to post just a You Tube video in a comment on a thread. It's posting You Tube videos (and stolen uncredit graphics like your Dancing With the Czars pic) as a blog topic that will get you in trouble with Leninka.

Or if she's not around, me.

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Has anyone noticed the sudden disappearance of Comrade Theo? Is the nasty rumor true, that he was picked up and escorted to the FEMA Camp by none other than Queen Nanski & comrade Bwany Fwank? Did anyone else hear he was in contact with, dare I utter the name, . . . Glenn Beck?! Did dear Comrade Theo fall pray to some evil conservative plot?

https://tinyurl.com/yfx79sh

If true, is the Rancho now up for grabs? Who gets the cats? And when's the next party critical thinking assemble?

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Whoopie, you can avert your eyes. I know you won't get much more usage out of them if you keep rinsing them with Clorox.

Comrades, first let me apologize for leaving you to the tender ministrations of Bruno. No, Bruno is not the fellow picking his teeth. If I could order Bruno from, say, Amazon, I'd order up<center>Image </center>But unfortunately this is Bruno:<center>Image</center>
But sometimes I, unfortunately, get<center>Image </center>or<center>
Image </center>

And I find this very disturbing to think that my father may once have been a man of the left who became a thing of the right. There are no conservatives in my family. We've protested, bitched, whined, annoyed, moaned and complained without cessation as long as anyone can know. We're utterly useless, we think the world winks out of existence when we close our eyes, and, well, we're <i>progs</i>. We own the world. Or would, if it were a good world.

Now there is nothing I'd like more than to be related to Pamalinsky, but is it fair to a newly minted prog to suggest that she has a <i>conservative</i> in her family tree?

That would be like as Republican Kennedy. Or a Kennedy male who didn't have something to do with the death of an innocent woman.

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And no, Fraulein, I have not disappeared. I have merely been undercover. There's an old widow woman here in Pecos and I found that she has some money. Since I'm a made prog I'm bound to get it, am I not? After all, whatever uses she has for the money are nothing compared to the uses that I have for the money.

Made progs need a nice place to live. And I think that I need some B&W 800D speakers. You know, the ones with diamond tweeters. I have some in the bedroom but not the 800s, and I figure that the old widow woman has enough money for me to upgrade my den with 800D speakers. And there ought to be at least $15 or $20 left to give to the poor.

That's why I'm a made prog. I make investments. In myself.

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Commissar Theocritus wrote: There are no conservatives in my family. We've protested, bitched, whined, annoyed, moaned and complained without cessation as long as anyone can know. We're utterly useless.

We are sooo relieved, dearest Theo, to find you amongst our midst, once again. (and I'll be *&%$#! if I ever listen to one of Czar Czar drunken rumor mills again).

Your statement makes me so deeply proud of you and yours. You bring back such found memories of my late Mr. Pulloskies, for he too, was "utterly useless"... a TRUE Prog!

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Ah, Fraulein, I do understand. As soon as I can, I'm going to shuttle out the door to leave the people here to do my work. I'm going to go to the stores and talk about "My office" and "My girls" and "My people," as though I owned them. And what prog does not want to own people? That's the essence of progdom.

This weekend? I'm going to sleep at least half of every day in my adjustable bed with the 50" television and the B&W speakers and the Dish DVR. I am in the middle of an embroilment with Dish, which took off the Barack Obama channel which was 24/7. It had pictures of him walking on water, flying in the air, making the dead rise, making the waters of the oceans subside, discovering a perpetual-motion machine (which is not a variation on the Stirling Engine, but Rahm Emanuel's mouth), and of course Dear O'Leader putting 100% recycled, fair-trade bandages on the paws of sick puppies.

The planets all halt in their orbits to admire His Holy Zeroness, and on Barack TV when he flies in Air Force One the oceans part all the way down to the ocean floor.

Why, oh why, did they take that off television? That was all that I needed to be happy and contented.

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Oh, dear Comrade, is no wonder they took it off television brackovision if you were receiving "happy and contented". Is that not forbidden is large quantities? Maybe you were finding too much, for too long... much like our vodka friend offers and the reason we have rationing. I suggest you spend more time tisking and frowning and the Barackovision might be returned at little or no expense. I can't wait til the Carter "misery index" returns... they we'll find true joy.

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Commissar Theocritus wrote:Whoopie, you can avert your eyes. Image

Great googlie mooglie Theo. Does Kim Kardashian know that your pool boy Enrico stole her ass? Isn't that a violation of her intellectual property rights?

btw: I no longer rinse my eyes with Clorox. Now I pop them out of their sockets and let them soak in toilet bowl cleaner over night. Very refreshing.

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Commissarka Pinkie wrote:Pamalinsky:

Obamugabe is in Cubepliance.

It is perfectly permissible to post just a You Tube video in a comment on a thread. It's posting You Tube videos (and stolen uncredit graphics like your Dancing With the Czars pic) as a blog topic that will get you in trouble with Leninka.

Or if she's not around, me.


Oh. (didn't know that) I thought we were supposed to steal anything we could get our hands on.
I'm ashamed to show my face!

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Comrade Whoopie wrote:
Commissar Theocritus wrote:Whoopie, you can avert your eyes.

Great googlie mooglie Theo. Does Kim Kardashian know that your pool boy Enrico stole her ass? Isn't that a violation of her intellectual property rights?

btw: I no longer rinse my eyes with Clorox. Now I pop them out of their sockets and let them soak in toilet bowl cleaner over night. Very refreshing.

WOW, THAT'S ONE WHOPP'N BOOTIE. Kimmie might do well to let Erico keep that sucker.
btw, all of us at the gulag are forced motivated to wash in the toilet bowl, Comrade Whoopie. Of course, here, the 'bowl' is an earthen pit... we tell ourselves how refreshing it is, too. spit spit

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Commissarka Pinkie wrote:Pamalinsky:

Obamugabe is in Cubepliance.

It is perfectly permissible to post just a You Tube video in a comment on a thread. It's posting You Tube videos (and stolen uncredit graphics like your Dancing With the Czars pic) as a blog topic that will get you in trouble with Leninka.

Or if she's not around, me.


Comrade Pinkie

WEW! What a relief. After that whack you gave me the other day I am still afraid of my own shadow. Which is probably a good thing, for it sends the right message to my proles. They should all be afraid of my shadow too.

Amandla!

Obamugabe.

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Yes, Enrico does have a marvelous derrière. The reason that he's so muscular is that he has to do something all the time--when he sits down it cuts off the blood to his brain, which was never well supplied with it anyway.

Whoopie, you could merely let the Nano Jimmy Carter Rabbits clean your eyes. They'd do a better job than toilet cleaner, I think.

Obamugabe, not to worry. When we have Obamathenasia, to save costs all people who are ill with more than a hangnail will be sanctioned.

I should tell the comrades that Pamalinsky is doing much better now. I had her throw darts at a picture of Rush Limbaugh and make confetti out of the WSJ.

In particular, I made her write out the addition table--<b>wrong</b>. That's the prog thing to do, isn't it? 2 and 2 are 4, but 2 trillion and 2 trillion are only 500 million. Get it?

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Commissar Theocritus wrote:Yes, Enrico does have a marvelous derrière. The reason that he's so muscular is that he has to do something all the time--when he sits down it cuts off the blood to his brain, which was never well supplied with it anyway.

Oh My! The late Mr. Pulloskies had the same derrière problem. At least that was the excuse he gave, although, his rear quarters were not nearly so . . . . taunt.
I think your Progressive Math is very progressive. Just keep Pamalinsky repeating it over and over and over . . .

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Fraulein Pulloskies wrote: (and I'll be *&%$#! if I ever listen to one of Czar Czar drunken rumor mills again).

I DENOUNCE "Frau" "Frauline" WTF-ever-her-name-is "Pulloskies" for blaming me for a 'rumor mill' she clearly started herself, or overheard from a schnockered Brunoski!

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Fraulein Pulloskies wrote: Oh My! The late Mr. Pulloskies had the same derrière problem.

Fraulein, I'm trying to picture the "late Mr. Pulloskies" based on all the things you've said about him in so many threads. I think this may be him...

Image

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Commissar Theocritus wrote:up yours!<center>Image

Theo, I don't know what everyone is TALKING about!

All I, Pamalinsky, a newly "minted" prog (I'm using "green" as a "theme" here) see, is two Honeydew melons! With the green saturation level ramped up. Or, if you look a bit deeper, two hugely inflated tennis balls!)

I'm goin' for the Honeydew Melons! Honeydew This, Honeydew That! Much like Calvin and Hobbes fighting in a bag!

By the way, Commissar, I noticed you have that "up/center" html code DOWN when posting pictures like this. I can only see it when I edit.

What is UP with THAT?

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I think I'm me more smarter after this, this and that... except for:

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...I've got nothing...

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Now that you've grayed it, Comrade Buffoon, I wonder that it wouldn't make a decent Avatar for a future Cubist. Wait a minute. I'd better not put any ideas in Comrade Theocritus's head.

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Leninka wrote:Pamalinski,

I veritably believe you may be Comrade Theocritus's long lost twin. Or daughter? Tell the truth Comrade Theocritus! Are you now, or have you ever been involved in a heterosexual liaison?

Dearest Leninka,

I sometimes wonder if you are not a "Yenta" in disguise! I happen to be an expert on Yentas, having lived in New York City for over 16 years!

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Czar Czar wrote:
Fraulein Pulloskies wrote: (and I'll be *&%$#! if I ever listen to one of Czar Czar drunken rumor mills again).

I DENOUNCE "Frau" "Frauline" WTF-ever-her-name-is "Pulloskies" for blaming me for a 'rumor mill' she clearly started herself, or overheard from a schnockered Brunoski!

Glorious comrade Czar Czar ~ you're are correct and I denounce my misspeakings! (vodka is the devils work!!) The rumor was bouncing around in the earthen toilet so long, it was hard to tell where it originated. Humble apologies.

Comrade Whoopie. My, My MY! That is very close to the likeness of the late Mr. P, except, your facsimile appears more life-like that the actual Mr. Pulloskies. I do believe I feel a tear.

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Leninka wrote:Now that you've grayed it, Comrade Buffoon, I wonder that it wouldn't make a decent Avatar for a future Cubist. Wait a minute. I'd better not put any ideas in Comrade Theocritus's head.

To be honest Leninka, after seeing the cheeks of glory, I had to go outside, shoot three helpless animals, smack a random woman in a seedy bar and parade around the local Casey's convenience store in a mustard stained wife beater mumbling Marxist slogans just to get my machismo back.

This sexy pic of Dear Leader and Helen Thomas helped as well.

Image

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Comrade Buffoon, all I can say is that if every woman looked like Helen Thomas...Well, I'm not gay, but I could learn.

Oh jeez, is that nipple?

Where did I leave that bottle of toilet bowl cleaner, I need an eye soak.

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Comrade Whoopie, the word "nipple" does no justice. "The Glorious Teet Of Collectivism" is more appropriate.

Today's denouncement goes to Theo for introducing the "cheeks of glory"

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Comrade Buffoon wrote:
Leninka wrote:Now that you've grayed it, Comrade Buffoon, I wonder that it wouldn't make a decent Avatar for a future Cubist. Wait a minute. I'd better not put any ideas in Comrade Theocritus's head.

To be honest Leninka, after seeing the cheeks of glory, I had to go outside, shoot three helpless animals, smack a random woman in a seedy bar and parade around the local Casey's convenience store in a mustard stained wife beater mumbling Marxist slogans just to get my machismo back.

This sexy pic of Dear Leader and Helen Thomas helped as well.

Image

{off}

Arrrgggh! My effin' eyes!
God damn you Buffoon. Her nipples are hard and she doesn't have a bra on.
I'll never recover!
I'm getting a lawyer!
Pain & suffering!
Emotional distress!

Burned, branded in the mind's eye.
Now I'm doomed to a life of dispair.

I think Obama put Ex-Lax in the chocolate chip birthday cupcakes. That why he has that sh!t eating grin.

Thank God there was no sound. It would be like listeing to buzzards mate.....Squak...honk...Squak.

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Comrade Buffoon wrote: Image
CAPTION CONTEST!!!!!
"Hey Barry, is that a toothpick, or are you just happy to see me?"

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Laika the Space Dog wrote:
Comrade Buffoon wrote:
Leninka wrote:Now that you've grayed it, Comrade Buffoon, I wonder that it wouldn't make a decent Avatar for a future Cubist. Wait a minute. I'd better not put any ideas in Comrade Theocritus's head.

To be honest Leninka, after seeing the cheeks of glory, I had to go outside, shoot three helpless animals, smack a random woman in a seedy bar and parade around the local Casey's convenience store in a mustard stained wife beater mumbling Marxist slogans just to get my machismo back.

This sexy pic of Dear Leader and Helen Thomas helped as well.

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{off}

Arrrgggh! My effin' eyes!
God damn you Buffoon. Her nipples are hard and she doesn't have a bra on.
I'll never recover!
I'm getting a lawyer!
Pain & suffering!
Emotional distress!

Burned, branded in the mind's eye.
Now I'm doomed to a life of dispair.

I think Obama put Ex-Lax in the chocolate chip birthday cupcakes. That why he has that sh!t eating grin.

Thank God there was no sound. It would be like listeing to buzzards mate.....Squak...honk...Squak.

You'll surely profit recover with an ACLU lawyer..

Need I remind you that pain, suffering and distress are capitalist (freedom type) emotions. You should endure any (and all) pain for the collective.

Sting says so...


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All you male comrades! What is all this yelling about Cheeks of Glory? Women don't yell when they see another woman's perfect rack. And no one has noticed that his thighs are also exceptional.

But it's a <i>picture</i>. It can't turn you.

Nothing can turn you. Nothing. Not even Helen Thomas. Whoopie, I know it's strange, but even if every woman on earth did look like Helen Thomas, you'd be doing her sister because you're straight. It's how it works.

(And how would you know that 99.999% of the women who have ever lived are more attractive than Helen? You wouldn't. To a male warthog a female warthog looks pretty.)

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Now that's what I call the downside to big boobs and old age.

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Did you hear her roasting Gibbs? Evens the scales for a lot of the hell that old bag gave RR.

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Comrade Buffoon wrote:Comrade Whoopie, the word "nipple" does no justice. "The Glorious Teet Of Collectivism" is more appropriate.

Today's denouncement goes to Theo for introducing the "cheeks of glory"

Nunu's, those are cold, droopy nunu's. Obviously the old commie bag Ms. T gave up underwear decades ago. That's enough to make the straightest woman heave'n hurl. Someone needs to get her some duct tape.

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I'm thinking stewing in a pot and feeding to pigs.

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Comrade Buffoon wrote:
{off}

Arrrgggh! My effin' eyes!
God damn you Buffoon. Her nipples are hard and she doesn't have a bra on.
I'll never recover!
I'm getting a lawyer!
Pain & suffering!
Emotional distress!


Sting says so...


Meant to reply to this in a timely way but was caught up in the transformation of The Cube!

Loved hearing this from Sting! Also appropriate from this album and have always loved is...King of Pain. "There's a little black spot on the sun today...that's my soul up there..... " Thanks. Good hearing it again!


 
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