|People's Polo is the true sport of The People™, played to achieve The Greater Good™. Gone is the alienation that is the result of competitive sports. Gone are the corruptive corporate influences. People's Polo is compassionate humanist sport.|
|Building self-esteem is Rule #1|
People's Polo is a non-contact sport. The objective is to score by shooting the cube into the goal using the shovel.
As one team tries to score, the other must run beside them shouting compassionate words of encouragement.
Equality of Outcome
When a player makes a goal the score counts for both teams equally. Everyone is a non-winner.
In keeping with the spirit of inclusiveness, each player will have his/her/its turn. No player shall carry cube any farther than their share of the field. With a ten-player team, field is split into ten sections. No single player can carry cube more than one section without a hand-off. Violation of this rule carries a penalty.
Players will be penalized if any defensive move is made, even if in self-defense to protect the teams interest. ACLU certified referees will call for the offending players impeachment. For serious or multiple acts of defense, said player will receive a court order mandating six months of anger management courses combined with 24 sessions of sensitivity training.
We make no distinction by gender, age, height, weight, physical abilities, documentation, or intelligence. 3PL is the standard-bearer of tolerance, diversity and equality.
You Want Diversity?
Teams must adhere to strict rules of progressive affirmative action. Every minority must be represented in team line-ups. In an effort to erase sins of DWEM, any score or other achievement by a white male player will be credited to a minority player. Furthermore white male players will receive punishment for any penalty committed by a minority player.
For other rules of play see 753 page 3PL pamphlet, soon to be made available according to directive in 2nd Five Year Plan.
People's Polo is the only sport for a progressive world. A world without winners is a happy, moral place.
So join in the fun. As a spectator or a participant you will be contributing to the strengthening of the collective and the future of progressivism.
Let live forever in the people's memory the unparalleled achievement of the Progressive People’s Polo League, and all those who selflessly struggle for the victory of progress!
Red SquareComrade Maksimovich -
Maksim MaksimovichI refuse to appear at show trial, you will have to do this by force.
Red SquareThose at the top are, of course, infallible.
Red SquareIs that defiance I sense? A tearful admission of guilt, whether deserved or not, is the norm among us the faithful Party members
Red SquareWhere can I see the next International People's Polo tournament?
Maksim MaksimovichThis is what is needed, the wisdom and that “Let’s Just Get It Done” attitude that comes with national organizations like the U.N. and the E.U.
Commissar TheocritusWe could however break an elbow or a knee...
|Opiate of the People||8||1739|
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