Comrades, I am confused - having just seen this article about a good progressive talk show host allegedly talking to Andrew Breitbart in Hell, I, too, placed a call, but when I asked for Breitbart - I intended to make fun of him with St. Peter at the Pearly Gates jokes and such - I was given two options:

Press "1" for Heaven
Press "0" to speak to a Satanic Operator

Of course, I pressed "0" - and imagine my shock when a friendly - and very deep - voice answered, "DNC."!

My @%$# cheap phone service can't reach heaven or hell. I can get purgatory and heck though.

Well now that's just not right. If I call Hell, I should get the RNC. I think you didn't dial the number right R.O.C.K.

To place a call to hell, that joker didn't have to dial the number, he pressed "9" for the intercom.

You mean to tell me there are Comrades who don't have their free "Obama Phone" yet?

Shameful. You just tap 666 and the friendly operator will connect you to the hard working Democratic Peoples Servant of your choice after doing some Obamacare this, Obamacare that for awhile.

Beavis wrote:I pressed "0" for Satanic Operator, and I swear I heard Comrade Ted Kennedy's voice!

Trouble is Comrade Kennedy cannot come to phone. Bella Abzug is still sitting on his face. Whole thing was my idea as I am on Membership Committee down Here.

It's a local call from parts of Texazistan.

Comrade Pistov wrote:

Beavis wrote:I pressed "0" for Satanic Operator, and I swear I heard Comrade Ted Kennedy's voice!

Trouble is Comrade Kennedy cannot come to phone. Bella Abzug is still sitting on his face. Whole thing was my idea as I am on Membership Committee down Here.

Comrade Pistov wrote:Trouble is Comrade Kennedy cannot come to phone. Bella Abzug is still sitting on his face. Whole thing was my idea as I am on Membership Committee down Here.

We can hope - and probably assume - that Dearest Bella will be sufficiently satisfied by November 6th. Their votes will be sorely needed. Comrade Pistov, please do keep an eye on them come, say, late October.

Speaking of sorely, Comrade Ted's face was already a mess - I don't dare to ponder what it's going to be like when Bella gets through with him in November!