Dear Comrades,

Do you wonder to what depths of depravity capitalists will descend? Look no further!

The desire for profits and hunger for electricity to power their "luxury items" are insatiable! Now, they have created enormous wind generators which serve their dual purpose of destroying nature and generating profits!

Wind farms pitch plan to address bird deaths

Wind farm operators in the Altamont Pass are offering to shut down half of their electricity-producing windmills during the winter to reduce bird deaths and to replace them all with more modern machines within 13 years.

The Center for Biological Diversity says it won't drop the suit it filed against wind farm operators in November because their plan to reduce bird deaths doesn't go far enough.

SHUT THEM ALL DOWN!

Dear members of the avian collective:

Although I feel for my brothers' and sisters' plight at the sharp metal of the wind machines I must ask you, WHAT ABOUT THE REST OF US? We pigeons live every day in circumstances most birds would never endure! We are cursed as "flying rats," we survive on refuse, and we are killed at an alarming rate by vehicles and poisons!

Look, I and my bretheren are team players. Do we complain that we get second pick at refuse after the homeless during the day, and third pick after the rats at night? NO! But WHERE IS OUR CLASS ACTION INITIATIVE! WHERE IS OUR WRONGFUL DEATH SUIT? It is pure CLASSIST AND RACIST behaviour to put the "oh so noble" killer birds ahead of us peaceful pigeons! That's right, I said it! Those Eagles would kill us if they had the chance!

What Ivory Billed Woodpecker do I have to fuck to get some help around here?

<b>POWER TO THE PIGEONS!</b>

Dear Rock Pigeon! You are absolutely correct in your indignation. Speciism is the word you were looking for. Humans act out their reactionary beliefs that some species are less equal than others. Even among birds, pigeons are an oppressed minority! Pigeons have been disenfranchised for centuries, but enough is enough. Birds must have equal representation, and the objection that they don't pay taxes is outdated at best. The Democratic Party has received plenty of votes from people who never paid taxes in their lives! They live in pigeonholes, they get the crumbs from the state and charitable individuals, they crap on public property. How are those voters different from pigeons? People who are dead will never pay a penny to the state, yet they're registered voters in many Democratic districts. If you ask me I'd pick pigeons anytime!

Give pigeons the right to vote, and we will rule the world!

Ahem... Do you think, by any chance, if given the right to vote, some pigeons may start voting Republican?