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College campuses were roiled today over the news of a joke published at The People's Cube website that many progressives have taken as an offense against the sacred teachings of progressivism.

"That's not funny!" the Imamma (leader) of the College Progressive Enforcement squads declared of the joke. "I have issued a fatwa ruling that these feral pig monkeys at The People's Cube responsible for this slander of the sacred teachings of progressivism be dealt with. The teachings of progressivism are clear. Many a good believer finds himself in trouble for laughing with the infidel and then falls sick from disease and dies. Or, by inappropriate laughter at infidel jokes, gets beat up by the college progressive enforcement squad and then falls sick and dies. I have issued this fatwa against The People's Cube so as to keep the true believers safe from falling sick and dying."

The center of the controversial storm that has sparked violent college protests of progressive believers across the country today began with the comment by Jerry Seinfeld, the infidel comedian, quoted as saying he refuses to play at college campuses as they are "too P.C." and don't have a sense of humor.

A poster at The People's Cube took the statement as fact and published the joke:

College progressive enforcement squads issue schematic humor flow-charts so students will know if a joke may be spontaneously laughed at under progressive law or if progressive law requires other action

...in the headlines section of the website, sparking the ire of and violent protests by good progressive believers worldwide. The progressive religion violently opposes the propagation of the idea that they are a sick religious cult with enforcement squads, spiritual leaders, and a brutal uncompromising religious law.

The publisher of The People's Cube and the writer of the joke have since gone in hiding.

We used to call such opportunity "upward mobility"


way back in dark days when individual achievement meant something, and all were not equal.

I have to admit I am confused by the negative reactions coming from college campuses. If they aren't told by their indoctrinators . . . uh . . . I mean by their professors, how will college students know which jokes are funny?

Great Stalin's Ghost wrote:I have to admit I am confused by the negative reactions coming from college campuses. If they aren't told by their indoctrinators . . . uh . . . I mean by their professors, how will college students know which jokes are funny?

Tovarisch Great Stalin's Ghost!

It should be obvious that college campi denizens and their political kommissars care little for humor…

…Though its qualities have been touted in the past:

The politics of peace strikes again!

Be sure to check the latest list of approved jokes. If you rely on a day-old list you may be a violator of the new list.

Ivan the Stakhanovets wrote:We used to call such opportunity "upward mobility"


way back in dark days when individual achievement meant something, and all were not equal.

Ah Comrade, how grateful we should all be that those days are long past us now!