Fellow Comrades:
It seems that certain scientists wanted to make sure that capitalism is destroyed by bringing down its citizens. The National Academy of Sciences in the USSA published a report pointing out the areas of weakness where terrorists can enter and harm and kill USSA citizens. Click here for the story.

Well, since the scientists brought about such a study, why don't we take advantage of it? Certainly a few missing USSA government officials can bring about change so that we can move in. Who's to say that the report was abused, since the report was written so accurately and precisely?

I didn't realize that capitalists were this dumb. You would think that they would at least try to cover up their problems, but here, I don't know what happened.

So, the next time you get that fresh supply of milk while milking that cow, make sure you follow the directions in the Academy of Sciences report.

Purifying milk according to the scientists,
Vladimir Ivanov
Red Journalism Headquarters, Moscow, USSR

Comrades,

This is one of many important studies. Its utility is unquestionable. After all, the days of sloppy dioxin poisoning are over!

I also wish to call attention to another fine study planned by Al Jazeera, on the porosity of the USSA / Mexican border. Certainly, this is a study that we would benefit from in our goal to unite all workers, Mexican and Amerikan alike, and to create a Global Socialist Paradise!

Never question the scientists, because through their means of science they can make up, I mean find out many things that the average people can't because we are too simple. Therefore whatever the scientists say must be true.