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In an effort to increase clarity of president Obama's message, the White House has ordered a new teleprompter, the NonPlus 2000. This model works at all angles while covering any issue, generating powerful messages on demand and spreading them evenly over large areas.

Comes with summer-edition Pocket-Sized Foreign Policy in four fun designer colors!

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Ushanka tip to Kevin Matthews for the idea!

I see there is smoke but no mirrors! Perhaps that is the reason for the less than optimal results being achieved... I demand to know what happened to all the #@$@#$@ mirrors!

Ah, never mind.

"The message, my friend, is blowing lots of in the wind...."

A great leap in mass communication technology. The speeches practically write themselves!

Comrades,

If you're old enough to remember this N.Y.C. sign, you may be too old to stay up this late!

Comrade Craptek.... your post is raaaaaacist according to the Current Truth ™ ....