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Help me help us help Joe

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Comrades--

I know that I have not been posting much of late, but there is a good reason for this. I have been on the road with the People's Candidate, Joe Biden.

Joe and brain.jpg

The former Vice President and well-known all-around great guy has retained me as a campaign consultant. I am responsible for coaching his impromptu question responses and making sure he takes his tonic every night before bed.

The problem is, I am running out of room to run him left. With candidates Like Liz Warren and Bernie (with special guest-Bolshevik AOC) coming up with increasingly hair-brained policy points, I've got to come up with something to make Joe look edgy and hip to appeal to the useful idiot vote. And let's face it, the only way were going to beat Trump is by mobilizing every useful idiot from here to Kamchatka.

So, let's put on our collective thinking caps here and help yer old Uncle Ivan come up with some newer, edgier, even more wacky platform planks. What have you got that's even less practical than the Green New Deal but twice as shiny?

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Have him run on “Make America Great Again” and watch the fun.

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Make Plagiarism, Hair Transplants and Fondling Breasts Great Again.

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Like, Klimate Justice - but on PLANETARY (not just measly GND!) scale.
(for brainstorms, I recommend Frau Merkel, blessed with delusions of PLANETARY grandeur)

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Ivan Betinov wrote:
So, let's put on our collective thinking caps here and help yer old Uncle Ivan come up with some newer, edgier, even more wacky platform planks. What have you got that's even less practical than the Green New Deal but twice as shiny?

I suggest you give him some antiandrogens so he can't think with his creepy lower brain as that is causing a short circuit with his upper brain making him sleepy.


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Help me help us help Joe to turn around and stop crying. It takes a big man to cry. It takes a bigger man to laugh at that man crying..Hahahahahaha!!!!

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Genosse Dummkopf wrote:... I recommend Frau Merkel ...

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Komrade Betinov (& Kollektive), see ze brilliance of Merkel's planetary klimthink:

Just days ago, the "Most Powerful Woman"* let the hoi polloi know, zat in ze Kanzleramt (ze Cherman pendant of White House, but in cold and repellent architecture-2000) ze water coolers will be no more equipped with plastic cups - it will be paper cups from now on!

(and, jawohl, she regrets zat her armored limousine can't be, alas, reengineered to electric ....)



* phew, as if there is no AOC, Herself, and Cher.

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I suggest that Ivan physically fill the empty space inside Biden's head, so that he could showcase the proof he has a brain.

For this purpose I'm resurrecting an archived image minus the captions, leaving it for the kollektive to fill in.

[img]/images/various_uploads/Biden_Brain_600.jpg[/img]

And an alternative version, in case Ivan feels cold and/or dehydrated.

[img]/images/various_uploads/Biden_Brain_600_2.jpg[/img]

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It doesn't hurt, of course, to have a Matryoshka head-kit to replace the content of Joe's head based on who he's talking to.

[img]/images/various_uploads/Matryoshkas_Betinov.jpg[/img]

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[img]/images/various_uploads/Biden_Brain_600_Boobs.jpg[/img]

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Papa K - I see what you did there, so here's Biden's original photo for any further suggestions.

[img]/images/various_uploads/Biden_Brain_600_Empty.jpg[/img]

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As of this writing, Joe is enjoying a clown show in his head, so he won't hear you if you talk to him.

[img]/images/various_uploads/Biden_Brain_600_Clowns.jpg[/img]


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Ivan Betinov wrote:Comrades--

I know that I have not been posting much of late, but there is a good reason for this. I have been on the road with the People's Candidate, Joe Biden.

Joe and brain.jpg

Comrade Ivan, I KNEW that it was you!! I attended one of Comrade Joe's massive rallies, and yes - that was indeed me, up there curled around that chandelier near the front of the room. As a guitar-playing rattlesnake, it's not a good idea to be "out in the crowd", so to speak, even when it's only about 25 people.


I'd never seen you out of your jar before, but I knew it had to be you! Well done, Comrade Brain!

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I hear Joe has trouble fundraising and keeps begging for money. Perhaps he'll have better luck if he starts selling tickets to showcase that roasted walnut inside his head that looks like a brain.

[img]/images/various_uploads/Biden_Brain_Tweet.jpg[/img]

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What's inside Joe Biden's head is what's inside Hunter biden's head is what's inside Hunter Biden's bank account ... More to come from Ukraine and Berisma where what's in Putin's head meets what was in Biden's head which was in Obama's head which was blankets to Ukraine for resisting Putin's invasion of Ukraine.

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--KOOK


 
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