Interpol spokesperson Klaus VanHubing provided prepared remarks to international journalists today regarding the investigation, “We are making no accusations at this time, but it is strange that the theft of an object treasured by fascists world-wide coincides with a huge convention devoted to international fascism.” The Climate Change Conference is in Copenhagen, Denmark - about 1000 km from Warsaw and easily accessible by road and rail.
He went on to say “We are investigating several different crackpots and radicals, but at this point all roads seem to lead back to Copenhagen.”
Additional reporting by The Hell Gazette.
There was Dear Leader "Bobby" Mugabe:
The anti-capitalist theme was picked up on by Mr Mugabe, Zimbabwe’s veteran President, who is the target of Western sanctions over alleged human rights abuses.
“When these capitalist gods of carbon burp and belch their dangerous emissions, it’s we, the lesser mortals of the developing sphere who gasp and sink and eventually die.”
and Comrade Fry:
The lead negotiator for the small island nation of Tuvalu, the bow-tie wearing Ian Fry, broke down as he begged delegates to take tough action.
“I woke up this morning crying,” and that’s not easy for a grown man to admit,” Mr Fry said on Saturday, as his eyes welled with tears.
”The fate of my country rests in your hands,” he concluded, as the audience exploded with wild applause.