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The communists feared and hated Elvis Presley for a number of reasons. The sexialized barbarism of his music and dance distracted young builders of communism and enticed them to embrace decadent capitalism. On top of that, in 1958 Elvis the Pelvis went to serve in the U.S. Army and was stationed in West Germany, defending it from the Eastern Bloc and undermining the communist morale by his very existence there.

All attempts to supplant rock and roll with kinder and gentler music and dance were doomed to failure. The East German dance "Lipsi" was dead on arrival, and so were other artificial creations. I, on my part, remember the clever undertaking by the Soviet government in the 70s and 80s to offer the heroic Soviet youth an alternative: if you want music and dance that sounds foreign, here's music from Cuba, Guatemala, and other progressive parts of Latin America. You will listen and you will like.

It is my unconfirmed but plausible theory that the Party's implicit efforts to cultivate Latin music in the former USSR account for the fact that most of today's Russian pop sounds a lot like some Latin "oldies but goldies" radio channel translated into the Mother Tongue.

Why Elvis' time in the Army scared the hell out of the communists

The communists needed a secret weapon of their own to counter Elvis' sultry hip movements. So, they came up with the Lipsi, a dance that was, uh... Let's just say the communist-approved version of the waltz that was aimed towards youngsters never caught on because, well...

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No, seriously. That's not a joke. Rock-and-roll dancing was akin to sexualized barbarism to the communists, and people were beaten, arrested, and sentenced to prison for partaking. Riots ensued when the East German youth were screaming, "long live Elvis Presley!" And when protesters had their homes raided, the intruders would routinely find pictures of Presley stashed away.

Rock and Roll dancing was what was barbaric but demonizing, beating, arresting, and throwing into prison Rock and Roll aficionados was normal civilized activity.

That's pretty much the same logic Antifa uses.

And if this isn't enough to convince the masses, may I remind everyone that Elvis was also a racist. That was in the news just recently. He stole his style of music from the African-Americans and then was proclaimed "The King" by a bunch of white women who voted the way their husbands told them to--for Trump. And he's an even bigger racist.

If you need further proof of this, Trump--the biggest racist of all--recently awarded the Medal of Freedom to Elvis. Freedom from what? He's dead! Makes me wonder if Elvis "voted" for Trump. I hope Mueller's looking into that. Otherwise, they should call it "The Medal of Racism." I wouldn't be surprised if Trump secretly refers to it that way. In fact, I know he does. It's just like him. And he's defrauding the American people by not admitting it, because if he did, no one would vote for him.

Finally, Elvis's pelvic movements indicate that he's nothing more than a rapist in search of a victim. That's why all those women used to scream while he did it. They were afraid of being raped. As a liberal feminist, I cannot think of any other explanation for that. If you can think of another explanation, then you're a misogynist racist who watches Fox News.

Commissarka Pinkie wrote:And if this isn't enough to convince the masses, may I remind everyone that Elvis was also a racist. That was in the news just recently. He stole his style of music from the African-Americans and then was proclaimed "The King" by a bunch of white women who voted the way their husbands told them to--for Trump. And he's an even bigger racist.

If you need further proof of this, Trump--the biggest racist of all--recently awarded the Medal of Freedom to Elvis. Freedom from what? He's dead! Makes me wonder if Elvis "voted" for Trump. I hope Mueller's looking into that. Otherwise, they should call it "The Medal of Racism." I wouldn't be surprised if Trump secretly refers to it that way. In fact, I know he does. It's just like him. And he's defrauding the American people by not admitting it, because if he did, no one would vote for him.

Finally, Elvis's pelvic movements indicate that he's nothing more than a rapist in search of a victim. That's why all those women used to scream while he did it. They were afraid of being raped. As a liberal feminist, I cannot think of any other explanation for that. If you can think of another explanation, then you're a misogynist racist who watches Fox News.

Once again, I must agree with Commissarka Pinkie on all points.

Captain "Ever Consonant" Craptek

Captain Craptek wrote:

Commissarka Pinkie wrote:And if this isn't enough to convince the masses, may I remind everyone that Elvis was also a racist. That was in the news just recently. He stole his style of music from the African-Americans and then was proclaimed "The King" by a bunch of white women who voted the way their husbands told them to--for Trump. And he's an even bigger racist.

If you need further proof of this, Trump--the biggest racist of all--recently awarded the Medal of Freedom to Elvis. Freedom from what? He's dead! Makes me wonder if Elvis "voted" for Trump. I hope Mueller's looking into that. Otherwise, they should call it "The Medal of Racism." I wouldn't be surprised if Trump secretly refers to it that way. In fact, I know he does. It's just like him. And he's defrauding the American people by not admitting it, because if he did, no one would vote for him.

Finally, Elvis's pelvic movements indicate that he's nothing more than a rapist in search of a victim. That's why all those women used to scream while he did it. They were afraid of being raped. As a liberal feminist, I cannot think of any other explanation for that. If you can think of another explanation, then you're a misogynist racist who watches Fox News.

Once again, I must agree with Commissarka Pinkie on all points.

Captain "Ever Consonant" Craptek

Another shovelful of magic makes the medicine go down.

Red Square wrote:
Why Elvis' time in the Army scared the hell out of the communists

The communists needed a secret weapon of their own to counter Elvis' sultry hip movements. So, they came up with the Lipsi, a dance that was, uh... Let's just say the communist-approved version of the waltz that was aimed towards youngsters never caught on because, well...

They might have had better luck with the Macarena:



- SK

Captain Craptek wrote:
Once again, I must agree with Commissarka Pinkie on all points.

Captain "Ever Consonant" Craptek

Sometimes I think Pinkie is just Lenin himself, guiding us from the eternal Heavenly Gulag (or where is it that we go when we die?).

$.$. Halliburton wrote:

Captain Craptek wrote:

Commissarka Pinkie wrote:And if this isn't enough to convince the masses, may I remind everyone that Elvis was also a racist. That was in the news just recently. He stole his style of music from the African-Americans and then was proclaimed "The King" by a bunch of white women who voted the way their husbands told them to--for Trump. And he's an even bigger racist.

If you need further proof of this, Trump--the biggest racist of all--recently awarded the Medal of Freedom to Elvis. Freedom from what? He's dead! Makes me wonder if Elvis "voted" for Trump. I hope Mueller's looking into that. Otherwise, they should call it "The Medal of Racism." I wouldn't be surprised if Trump secretly refers to it that way. In fact, I know he does. It's just like him. And he's defrauding the American people by not admitting it, because if he did, no one would vote for him.

Finally, Elvis's pelvic movements indicate that he's nothing more than a rapist in search of a victim. That's why all those women used to scream while he did it. They were afraid of being raped. As a liberal feminist, I cannot think of any other explanation for that. If you can think of another explanation, then you're a misogynist racist who watches Fox News.

Once again, I must agree with Commissarka Pinkie on all points.

Captain "Ever Consonant" Craptek

Another shovelful of magic makes the medicine go down.

Yes, and no discernible pelt damage.

Dancing with the Russian Bear....

Lipsi???

Nein. Ich habe nicht ein "bow-tie".