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Competition is a barbaric, insensitive ritual that reeks of social Darwinism. We cannot allow the fittest to survive on our pages. Your loss is someone else's gain, and your gain is someone else's loss. Therefore, losers contribute to the society and winners take away from it. Being a winner is unethical, while a society of losers is happy and striving as a collective. In the spirit of diversity, inclusiveness, and collectivism our contests shall have no winners. Everyone is declared a loser, which in our book means an ethical team player.

...you just might have become a Democrat voter!

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Excuse me my brief absence as I was recovering from a Bush-orchestrated diarrhea for the masses, in the course of which glorious fever was equally distributed through my brain and disabled most synapses responsible for caring about work, food, bills, and hygiene. A very enlightening and progressive experience, comrades! So while I'm still somewhat under its spell let me suggest a new idea for a contest called "...you just might have become a Democrat voter!"

Please expand:

- If you suffer from a sudden diarrhea and the only place in town with an open public bathroom happens to be a polling place, you just might have become a Democrat voter!

- If after a hard day of lying on the sidewalk you see a well-spoken man who promises booze and smokes as long as you follow him to a wondrous place filled with them space alien time machine things and you go press yourself some buttons, you just might have become a Democrat voter!

- If you and your family had stopped voting Democrat out of disgust years ago, and your car just sank into a county road pothole, killing you and your family while the party registration remained active - you just might have become a Democrat voter, again!


And so on...

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- If you attend public school and believe the teacher's political ranting.

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- If you became strangely aroused by that red blender which is currently on sale at Sears for 49.99$ - you just might have become a Democrat voter!

- If you, family or pets become increasingly dependent on foreign news from - oh, I don't know - Cuba! They yes, you just might have become a Democrat voter!

- If you hear voices at precisely 2:00 AM and instantly blame the CIA, FBI, Department of Homeland Security or William F. Buckley Jr. for implanting high-frequency brain-control implants in your head or up your ass - you just might have become a Democrat voter!

- If you believe that a fetus is a foreign lifeless glob of goo that is hazardous to Mother Earth and to your slutty drunken life partner - you just might have become a Democrat voter!

- If you believe that Rosie O'Donnell is hotter than Elizabeth Hasselbeck - you just might have become a Democrat voter!

- If you find yourself with large puss filled boils on your genitalia or if you have a burning sensation while urinating - you just might have become a Democrat voter!

- If you frequent a coffee shop with radical posters, incoherent poetry sessions and the smell of bong water - you just might have become a Democrat voter!

- If you triumphantly accuse the MSM as being biased in favor of conservative views all the while jerking off to the latest post on DailyKos because you were told it would end the war in Iraq and usher in world peace - you just might have become a Democrat voter!

- If you view the spreading of fecal matter onto canvas as a creative form of artistic expression and demand the government to fund such projects - you just might have become a Democrat voter!

- If you are a feminist advocating the rights of Muslim men to beat their wives to a pulp and dress them head-to-toe in black burqas - you just might have become a Democrat voter!

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- If you complain about the excesses of others while bitching at your personal assistant for not packing at least three pairs of your favorite Prada shoes all the while climbing into your luxurious private jet with the mini-bar, jacuzzi, massage therapist and on-board video conference communications center for when you have a meeting with your Global-Warming Awareness lobbying firm - you just might have become a Democrat voter!

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All great additions, Chairman, only in most cases changing to the Present Tense would be an improvement. I know you were trying to stick to the formula, but there's nothing wrong with saying, "If you're getting strangely aroused by that red blender which is currently on sale at Sears for 49.99$ - you just might be a Democrat voter!"

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- If you find yourself vowing to never vote Democrat ever again, election after election after election - you just might be a Democrat voter!

- If you think that political freedom means that voting allows you to force other people to do what you want to force them to do - you just might be a Democrat voter!

- If you contribute to PETA, ALF, Friends of the Earth, and GreenPeace - you just might be a Democrat voter!

- If you have a bumpersticker that reads: WAR IS TERRORISM! - you just might be a Democrat voter!

- If you want to strangle anyone that suggests that if "WAR IS TERRORISM!" then terrorism must be war - you just might be a Democrat voter!

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Awwaaah, does this mean I don't get a gold star or an A for effort!?!? What kind of Publik Edukashion are you running here, comrade?! My failure is an equal success and I should be recieving a truck load of accolades and other merits for my ethical losing acheivement! I'M A VICTIM, PITY ME (and spare some change, please)!

OK... so something has to happen to me in order for me to become a Democrat voter. Like... hmm...

If you're walking down the street and an ominous black van full of union members pulls over, opens the door, grabs you, and then proceeds to threaten your life and your family's life if you don't vote the straight party ticket - you just might have become a Democrat voter!

If you are currently awake from a valium induced sleep while being loosened from your restraints to help the men in white coats pull the magic lever that will keep the voices away - you just might have become a Democrat voter!

If you're are sitting in a comfy chair with a metal dish firmly attached to your head - with no known phone calls from the Governor - and are currently being told to sign some papers that would clear your name by gentlemen in fine crisp suites - you just might have become a Democrat voter!

If you're having snack time in Mrs. Newsome's 1st grade class and poor underpaid Mrs. Newsome is telling you to scratch your name the best you can on a sheet of paper full of boxes and complicated words - you just might have become a Democrat voter!


Do these work?

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- If you're eleven years old and a nice lady from Acorn just came to your door and had you sign a piece of paper - you just might have become a Democrat voter!

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Let us not fall victim to "ageism", comrades. Let us not forget our senior citizen friends who are very kindly asked to vote Democrat in every election.


- If you're suffering from mild dementia in a nursing home and the same nice lady from ACORN, who falsely claims to be your daughter, begs you to sign a piece of paper - you just might have become a Democrat voter!

- If you're relaxing at your Palm Beach vacation condo and an AARP gentleman comes knocking at the door pleading with you to sign a Federal Social-Security Protection Form to keep George Bush from "taking your check" - you just might have become a Democrat voter!

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I dunno, Red...The Chairman™ might have you on this one...or it could go either way...like a "switch hitter" so to speak...Theocritus!! What say you?

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"A+" for effort everybody. It seems that there are indeed two distinct formulas here:

A: A permanent condition of being a Democrat Voter
(e.g., generosity in spending other people's money combined with demands for higher taxes)

B: The moment when and the manner in which one becomes a Democrat Voter
(e.g., getting lured into a polling place by shiny objects, taken on a free charitable trip to town from a mental institution by ACORN, or simply buying a farm)

Either formula is equally valid and there probably is no need to separate the two. We may do this later if this gets legs and we want to make something bigger out of it.

I really like all entries so far - they truly reflect the science and the knowledge of human condition that are behind the growing power of the Democratic voting bloc!

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Here's another tangent: ... you just might have contributed to the Democratic Party!

- If you're in a teacher's union and you just paid your monthly dues - you just might have contributed to the Democratic Party!

- If you're reading the blogs at dKos or DU or ImpeachForRevolution and you click on a sidebar ad - you just might have contributed to the Democratic Party!

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- If your neighbor just got a new Porsche and you are so jealous that you decide that if you can't have one, no one can - you just might have become a Democrat voter!

Premier Betty wrote:- If your neighbor just got a new Porsche and you are so jealous that you decide that if you can't have one, no one can - you just might have become a Democrat voter!

Ah, yes… the sound and the fury of words spoken by an idiot… a draught from a cup that runneth over with the blood colored wine of self-deception of self-importance… Drink of it and savor the taste that lingers but for a moment on the tongue.… DRINK !!

Is yon speaker of self importance the owner of a brand new Porsche? A shiny new one that you can drive from corner to corner inside that little red cube you have built around yourself… so tightly enclosed that you must gasp for the need of air? What if the fellow citizen next door is not a Democrat or a Republican, and IS NOT jealous of the neighbor that owns a Porsche, nor has any desire for unnecessary riches? What then ??

What do you say then, O Enlightened One ? Here... Have another draught of this deceitful red, red wine of self-importance, and please teach us... Teach those of us that don't live (nor desire to) inside the little red cube!! Your ever full cup of the tree of knowledge runneth over. Is that what you believe life is really all about?? A new Porsche? Ahhhh...

"And all our yesterdays have lighted fools. The way to dusty death. Out, out, brief candle! Life's but a walking shadow; a poor player, That struts and frets his hour upon the stage, And then is heard no more: it is a tale Told by an idiot, full of sound and fury, Signifying nothing.
- Shakespeare"


Blue Bell

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- If you've just been convinced that Premier Betty is a self-important materialist who thinks that life is all about Porsches - you just might be a Democrat voter!

(Personally, I think life is all about the cute little British racing green, 12 cylinder, 1969 E-Type Jaguar uncle Cha-Ching gave me.)

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Blue Bell wrote:Is that what you believe life is really all about?? A new Porsche?

Yes, that and making other people feel bad for having one. I'm a Democrat and I care about the environment, social programs and America's eventual demise as a leading world power... I deserve a Porsche. As for my hard working entrepreneur neighbor who made an honest living building a small business? Well, he can settle with his jalopy because other people, mostly ungrateful crack addicts, need his money more. It's called PROGRESS, comrade Bell... get with the government program already. Sheesh!

If you make it your personal mission in life to punish the producer and reward the government-dependent welfare leech - you just might be a Democrat voter! Oh, and the welfare leech is a Democrat voter too! Yay!

Blue Bell wrote:red, red wine of self-importance

Dammit... now I will have that song stuck in my head for the rest of the night! Thanks a lot, comrade Blue Bell! You weak liberals and your decadent imperialist music... disgusting, absolutely disgusting!

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Comrade Betty - congratulations on the new Porsche! Drive responsibly! I hope it's red.

Comrade Blue Bell is such a literalist. If she believes in Bible she also believes the earth was made in six days. If she ever becomes and atheist she'll be criticizing the Bible for saying the earth was made in six days. I've also seen a lot of Marxist literalists in my day. They were trumpeting a new world-wide crisis of capitalism every time a US company laid off workers who got priced out of their jobs by labor unions.

I guess a literalist is someone without the capacity for abstract thinking who is struggling to solve a math problem. If you had three apples and you gave one to Premier Betty, how many have you left? Three. I'm not giving my apple to that greedy self-important Porsche owner! Also Ayn Rand is irrelevant because railroads are so last century!

I wonder what makes Blue Belle return to the Cube. Is it the puzzle she's still trying to solve?

If you can't solve the People's Cube Puzzle and it drives you mad - you just might be a Democrat voter!

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Blue Bell, you are most definitely a "garden variety" lib.

I think you need Mikael the Mime to enlighten you! Now THAT, Madame, was a Troll of the Highest Order...SALUTE!!

Now, go here:

http://impeachforpeace.org/index.php
http://impeachforpeace.org/blog/<br>http://www.thepeoplescube.com/red/viewtopic.php?t=909

I'll expect a full report, and it better be good...or you can expect the Black Mariah to pull up to your ditch and deliver you to the Karl Marx Treatment Center for some remedial training. Dress warmly, and bring your sharpest shovel.

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Red Square wrote:If you can't solve the People's Cube Puzzle and it drives you mad - you just might be a Democrat voter!

Oh my!

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Blue Bell wrote: "And all our yesterdays have lighted fools. The way to dusty death. Out, out, brief candle! Life's but a walking shadow; a poor player, That struts and frets his hour upon the stage, And then is heard no more: it is a tale Told by an idiot, full of sound and fury, Signifying nothing.
- Shakespeare"

QUOTING SHAKESPEARE??? And posting it in BLUE!!! YOU HEATHEN! Where does the desecration end?

Apparently NEVER!!! For not ONCE, AND I MEAN NOT ONCE did you quote Marx or Lenin!!!

For without Marx and Lenin there would be NO Democratic (Socialist) Party as we know it today! No HRC! No Pelosivich! No Uncle Teddy! No Schmuck Schumer! Eh Gads Man/Woman/Troll/It !!! Have you no gratitude???

Your outrageous lack of sensitivity shall be rectified, Kulak Blue Bell!!! You are to report to the Jane Fonda Center for the Treatment of Anti-Socialist Behavior IMMEDIATELY!!! I'm sure you will find the burnt colored hills of San Bernardino, CA to be quite lovely this time of year.

Today you may be but a mere intellectual troglodyte! But tomorrow, you will be a functional organ (i.e. a useful idiot) of The Party<sup>tm</sup>.

Chairman Meow,

Be a dear and bring me 80 liters of Ethanol for a new batch of Margaritas. This Blue Bell is nothing more than a Socialist dilettante who has brought on a spell of palpitations!

--
Zampolit Boris Sukavich Blokhayev
Grand Inquisitor of the Reformed Church of Latter Day Climatology and Margarita Coordinator Consultant for The Party<sup>tm</sup>

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Red Square wrote: Comrade Blue Bell is such a literalist. If she believes in Bible she also believes the earth was made in six days. If she ever becomes and atheist she'll be criticizing the Bible for saying the earth was made in six days. I've also seen a lot of Marxist literalists in my day. They were trumpeting a new world-wide crisis of capitalism every time a US company laid off workers who got priced out of their jobs by labor unions.

The Blokhayev Colloquy:
If she ever becomes and atheist she'll be criticizing the Bible for saying the earth was made in six days. And contacting her fellow travelers in the AFL-CIO requesting they send a notice to God demanding that all future cosmic creations use unionized labor!

--
Zampolit B. S. Blokhayev

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My dearest friend comrade Blokhayev wrote:Be a dear and bring me 80 liters of Ethanol for a new batch of Margaritas. This Blue Bell is nothing more than a Socialist dilettante who has brought on a spell of palpitations!

Indeed! I feel as if I need a drink myself... all this reactionary blabbering by Kulak Blue Bell is making me a bit hot under my expensive tax-dollar funded silk dress shirt and matching silk tie. Ugh, these people have no respect whatsoever for The Party or our work! SHAME! SHAAAMMMEEE! Before you know it she'll be quoting Adam Smith and really confuse the little ones!

Kulak Blue Bell, leave this place and stop desecrating the People's Cube! Only the Cube will liberate the Wee People from the chains of a free-market! Scurry along now and go back to your Rovian masters!!

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Chairman M. S. Punchenko wrote: Before you know it she'll be quoting Adam Smith and really confuse the little ones!

Kulak Blue Bell, leave this place and stop desecrating the People's Cube! Only the Cube will liberate the Wee People from the chains of a free-market! Scurry along now and go back to your Rovian masters!!

She needs a good dose of the DailyKos!!! It'll loosen her right up!!!

Rovian Masters? Yes! It all makes sense now! Kulak Blue Bell is a member of .......

Bushitler's Gestapo!!!!

I thought I detected the "stench" of a Fascist KKKapitalist!!!!

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Chairman M. S. Punchenko wrote:Indeed! I feel as if I need a drink myself...

Here ya go my good comrade!!! 200 liters of Margaritas!!!! That ought to last The Party™ about 8 hours!

Time for a just a little sip ...

*sluuuurrrrp*

WHOOOOOAAAAAHHH GAWD DAYUM!!!! HOLY STALIN'S GHOST!!!!! SHIIIIIIITTTTTTEEEEEEEE!!!

*panting* *panting* *panting* *panting*

SONOFABEYOTCH!!! WHAT THE HELL WAS THE OCTANE RATING ON THAT ETHANOL, MEOW??? DID YOU GET THAT SHIT FROM LUPE???

LUPE??? Did you give Chairman Meow those 80 liters of Ethanol for the Margaritas???

Lupe??? LUPE??? LUPE??? Answer me damn it!!!!

--

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Damn...I've been so busy fighting crackheads that I missed a troll alert.

I guess it was just a hit and run though.

Poor Blue Bell.

She's probably reading Faulkner right now and too busy to reply.
Isn't it fun to be a lib/socialist and be so erudite?

Ask not for whom the Blue Bell trolls, it trolls for thee....

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She's probably reading Faulkner right now and too busy to reply

Or maybe "The Assault on Reason" a how-to manual by Al Gore.
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Red Square wrote:Comrade Betty - congratulations on the new Porsche! Drive responsibly! I hope it's red.

Comrade Blue Bell is such a literalist. If she believes in Bible she also believes the earth was made in six days. If she ever becomes and atheist she'll be criticizing the Bible for saying the earth was made in six days. I've also seen a lot of Marxist literalists in my day. They were trumpeting a new world-wide crisis of capitalism every time a US company laid off workers who got priced out of their jobs by labor unions.

I guess a literalist is someone without the capacity for abstract thinking who is struggling to solve a math problem. If you had three apples and you gave one to Premier Betty, how many have you left? Three. I'm not giving my apple to that greedy self-important Porsche owner! Also Ayn Rand is irrelevant because railroads are so last century!

I wonder what makes Blue Belle return to the Cube. Is it the puzzle she's still trying to solve?

If you can't solve the People's Cube Puzzle and it drives you mad - you just might be a Democrat voter!


Dear Red Square and Members of the Peoples Cube,

Please accept my most humble apologies for having deeply offended you all by my recent comments re: the saga of the individual being so jealous of a neighbor's new Porsche that he (or she) might decide to vote Democratic. My reaction and response was undoubtedly the result of too much musing in negative thought on the ills and sickness of Humanity in general. That, and my sipping from a goblet of red, red wine.

Later, I recalled the thrill of my once owning a brand new 1962 cream colored T-Bird, with tilted steering wheel, dark red leather interior, and loaded with extras. It was a sweet thing, and I drove it with pride.

Back to the Democrats:

Democrats are mean, crass, and lowly, and the only people that harbor grudges and the human emotions of envy and jealously? They exemplify the hated dog to be kicked? Yet, there are two sides to every coin, thought, or question… necessary opposites of the whole that attract and distract. One cannot exist or be understood without the existence of the other. In essence, do they make up a part of the whole, and are they equally important?

I may be too literal and serious, but I am NOT a Democrat. I am a Moderate and Independent voter, inclined to vote for the candidate… not the party. I am NOT a liberal, especially in that I do NOT support the bulk of government funded, socialist programs that are strangling America. Though I appreciate the Bible as a work of literature and history, I am an Atheist. I search for Harmony in the world and the universe, but like Victor Hugo, I see only Disharmony.

I just heard that “the right to die” Dr. Kevorkian(sp?) was released from prison. I feel he was wrongfully sentenced. My entry for the competition is: If the Democrats passed a “right to die” law (in cases of incurable disease or senility of the elderly), I might be inclined to vote Democratic.

But to heck with all that stuff and the Democrats and the Wine !! You figure out the problems. Bartender !! I'll have one of those Margaritas !! Make it a double on the rocks… with plenty of salt on the edge.

I am not a troll, and I still admire the humor and intelligence I see in TPC. If you will allow me, I will check into the Karl Marx Treatment Center periodically for necessary treatment.

Regards,
Blue Bell

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Consider the dime dropped, comrade. The Black Mariah will be there shortly to collect you. As I said, warm clothing and a sharp shovel will be required.

I think you can be saved, comrade Blue. We'll have you voting Democrat in no time!

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Blue Bell wrote: I'll have one of those Margaritas !! Make it a double on the rocks… with plenty of salt on the edge.

Since you'll be spending time at the Karl Marx Treatment Center, I'll make it a triple. Just sip it lightly!!!! This batch will reach up out of the glass and slap the Democrat out of you! And NO OPEN FLAMES within 50ft of your Margarita glass with this batch!!!

After your time in the KMTC up, allow me to recommend that you check into the The Jane Fonda Center for the Treatment of Anti-Socialist Behavior. It worked wonders for many a POW in Vietnam! Why the co-directors of the JFC are old friends of Comrade Jane's, Gen. Vol Vo (P.L.A. of Vietnam, Ret.) and Gen. Wen Duc Tiap (P.L.A. of Vietnam, Ret.). Yes, the electro-shock therapy does leave some people with a drooling problem. But this side effect is temporary. One of my margaritas usually helps. But the JFC will have you singing "Yes, Allah Hates Me, For the Koran tells me so".

Here's to what's left of your health! Salute!

*clink*

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Zampolit B. S. Blokhayev

S.A.F. Marshal Pravda wrote:Consider the dime dropped, comrade. The Black Mariah will be there shortly to collect you. As I said, warm clothing and a sharp shovel will be required.

I think you can be saved, comrade Blue. We'll have you voting Democrat in no time!

Dear comrade S.A.F. Marshal Pravda,

Thank you for considering me for treatment at the KMTC!! Perhaps it's not too late, and I can be saved !!

Due to my snoopy and obnoxious neighbors, please have the Black Mariah pick me up in the alley behind my place. Reinforcements might be necessary. I will be in disguise, dressed in a black cape with a red flower tucked inside the hood.

As required, I will bring warm clothing and a sharp shovel. "Shovel??" Should I also bring a BUCKET??

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Dear fascist sympathizer Kulak Blue Bell,

Kulak Blue Bell wrote:Later, I recalled the thrill of my once owning a brand new 1962 cream colored T-Bird, with tilted steering wheel, dark red leather interior, and loaded with extras. It was a sweet thing, and I drove it with pride.

Explain that post to me! How dare you come here to spread your counter-revolutionary Kulak ways! How dare you taint our progressive flock with such unrealistic dreams! HOW MANY PEOPLE HAD TO DIE TO MAKE THAT DECADENT AUTOMOBILE! HUH!!??! HOW MANY! OWNERSHIP!?! OWWNNEEERRRSSHHIIIPPP!?!?!? THERE IS NO SUCH THING!

Once again I find myself disgusted and typing in all caps. Once again I find another "individual" rubbing decadent and corrosive trinkets in the face of a morally astute collectivist. Kulak Blue Bell, there is such a place as Hell... and it's called Detriot, OK? And do you know why it's so bad there? I'll tell you why... GEORGE BUSH! And here you are, talking about your precious auto and how much fun you had with it at the expense of Premier Betty, poor unloved Premier Betty, who would give his one remaining testicle to have such an auto. All he has is a Porsche and then you come along and make him feel bad telling him all about your pimped out T-Bird.

T-Bird indeed... the only bird that was on your auto was the eagle of the Third Reich, you fascist sympathizer! If it weren't for you and your Nazimobile we wouldn't be in Iraq right now stealing Saddam's oil! SHAME! SHAME! OUTRAGE! Now apologize to the collective for indulging in such things as a nice car. That car could have fed twelve disgruntled third world freedom fighters keen on bringing America to her knees. Disgusting... absolutely disgusting display of richness! How much do you pull in, Kulak Blue Bell? How much corporate welfare do you rack in? 80,000? 90,000? 100,000!?! My Darwin! Not a 100,000! You must have a paper towel dispenser made of solid gold! I'm sure you worked for it too... which makes it an even higher capital offense. Mmmm Mmmmm.... I'm totally disgusted now and have soiled myself not once... but thrice! Yes, let that be a reminder to everyone just how mad I am when I crap my pants three times.

Tsk. Tsk. Tsk. Well, we are your only hope now, aren't we? We will save you, Kulak Blue Bell. We make you feel guilt like you never have before in your life! We will make you question whether you are human or not, AND we will make you come to the realization that we are all Macaca created in Macaca's image (which means we are not human... we are monkey, therefore animals that smear poop at visitors). Kulak Blue Bell, we are here to help... now let us in your brain to tinker around a bit and we will get you to be as good as new!


Saving fascist from themselves,

-- Meowsevich S. Punchenko

Zampolit Blokhayev wrote:
Blue Bell wrote: I'll have one of those Margaritas !! Make it a double on the rocks… with plenty of salt on the edge.

Since you'll be spending time at the Karl Marx Treatment Center, I'll make it a triple. Just sip it lightly!!!! This batch will reach up out of the glass and slap the Democrat out of you! And NO OPEN FLAMES within 50ft of your Margarita glass with this batch!!!

After your time in the KMTC up, allow me to recommend that you check into the The Jane Fonda Center for the Treatment of Anti-Socialist Behavior. It worked wonders for many a POW in Vietnam! Why the co-directors of the JFC are old friends of Comrade Jane's, Gen. Vol Vo (P.L.A. of Vietnam, Ret.) and Gen. Wen Duc Tiap (P.L.A. of Vietnam, Ret.). Yes, the electro-shock therapy does leave some people with a drooling problem. But this side effect is temporary. One of my margaritas usually helps. But the JFC will have you singing "Yes, Allah Hates Me, For the Koran tells me so".

Here's to what's left of your health! Salute!

*clink*

---
Zampolit B. S. Blokhayev

------


Comrade Zampolit B. S. Blokhayev,

Cheers !! Thanks for the high octane triple Margarita... I think...??? ZOWIE !! Being part Witch, I was burning some scented candles, and had to put out a couple of small fires. I do NOT look forward to the electro shock treatment or drooling problems at the JFC. Keep those batches of h.o.t. Margaritas in readiness.

The democrat left in me feels sufficiently numbed. Btw, I saw Jane Fonda in Georgia Rules. She looked as though she'd had a few too many face lifts.

Blue Bell

Chairman M. S. Punchenko wrote:Dear fascist sympathizer Kulak Blue Bell,

Kulak Blue Bell wrote:Later, I recalled the thrill of my once owning a brand new 1962 cream colored T-Bird, with tilted steering wheel, dark red leather interior, and loaded with extras. It was a sweet thing, and I drove it with pride.

Explain that post to me! How dare you come here to spread your counter-revolutionary Kulak ways! How dare you taint our progressive flock with such unrealistic dreams! HOW MANY PEOPLE HAD TO DIE TO MAKE THAT DECADENT AUTOMOBILE! HUH!!??! HOW MANY! OWNERSHIP!?! OWWNNEEERRRSSHHIIIPPP!?!?!? THERE IS NO SUCH THING!

Once again I find myself disgusted and typing in all caps. Once again I find another "individual" rubbing decadent and corrosive trinkets in the face of a morally astute collectivist. Kulak Blue Bell, there is such a place as Hell... and it's called Detriot, OK? And do you know why it's so bad there? I'll tell you why... GEORGE BUSH! And here you are, talking about your precious auto and how much fun you had with it at the expense of Premier Betty, poor unloved Premier Betty, who would give his one remaining testicle to have such an auto. All he has is a Porsche and then you come along and make him feel bad telling him all about your pimped out T-Bird.

T-Bird indeed... the only bird that was on your auto was the eagle of the Third Reich, you fascist sympathizer! If it weren't for you and your Nazimobile we wouldn't be in Iraq right now stealing Saddam's oil! SHAME! SHAME! OUTRAGE! Now apologize to the collective for indulging in such things as a nice car. That car could have fed twelve disgruntled third world freedom fighters keen on bringing America to her knees. Disgusting... absolutely disgusting display of richness! How much do you pull in, Kulak Blue Bell? How much corporate welfare do you rack in? 80,000? 90,000? 100,000!?! My Darwin! Not a 100,000! You must have a paper towel dispenser made of solid gold! I'm sure you worked for it too... which makes it an even higher capital offense. Mmmm Mmmmm.... I'm totally disgusted now and have soiled myself not once... but thrice! Yes, let that be a reminder to everyone just how mad I am when I crap my pants three times.

Tsk. Tsk. Tsk. Well, we are your only hope now, aren't we? We will save you, Kulak Blue Bell. We make you feel guilt like you never have before in your life! We will make you question whether you are human or not, AND we will make you come to the realization that we are all Macaca created in Macaca's image (which means we are not human... we are monkey, therefore animals that smear poop at visitors). Kulak Blue Bell, we are here to help... now let us in your brain to tinker around a bit and we will get you to be as good as new!


Saving fascist from themselves,

-- Meowsevich S. Punchenko


Comrade Chairman M. S. Punchenko,

I refuse to grovel in the dirt for forgiveness or apologize to the Collective for having OWNED my precious T-Bird !! I worked and paid for that Bird with my own hard earned savings. Three kids later put a halt to such self-indulgencies, and I was reduced to economy cars.

Premier Betty, poor unloved Premier Betty, who would give his one remaining testicle to have such an auto. All he has is a Porsche and then you come along and make him feel bad telling him all about your pimped out T-Bird.

Aren't Porsches more expensive than T-Birds? Premier Betty has testicles?? Please explain....

Blue Bell

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Blue Bell wrote:I refuse to grovel in the dirt for forgiveness or apologize to the Collective for having OWNED my precious T-Bird !! I worked and paid for that Bird with my own hard earned savings.

Once again you are spouting reactionary filth in the face of people who wish to cure you. Those savings could have done better things like pay for a crack or meth addiction, a new pair of pricey Prada stilletto heels or... and this one is important... set up a Hip Hop recording studio in the inner-city to allow a progressive child the means to create progressive profanity laden music for collective enjoyment. But no, you had to buy something for yourself to appease your selfish appetite. How many Little People had to suffer for you to drive down the road, sunglasses and all, hair blowing in the wind and a huge grin on your face? How many? Five? Ten? A Trillion!?!? Yes, trillions of people have suffered and we have the data to prove it.

Now don't get me wrong here... I know nothing of economics, partly because I'm a Washington insider who dwells (and parties) within the Beltway. With that said, this economy is the worst in history because those Little People, those who were forced to suffer for your Nazimobile binge, can't afford such things. I hope your happy, Blue Bell. I hope your happy with all the destruction you have caused with your Third Reich Bird.

Blue Bell wrote:Premier Betty has testicles??

No he doesn't, nor do I or any other progressive man. We lost our balls many years ago when we inked our names in blood on the Party registration form. But since we are Party members we don't need balls or those things called a "soul" that the rethugs preach about all time. No, all we need is our bleeding heart which aides us in bleeding your wallet. We need your money, Blue Bell, so that we can take care of those who will elect us in future elections.

Poor people + other people's money + keeping education standards low = re-election

It's an easy formula... we keep people poor, remove any incentive of working harder and making a better living, promote class envy, allow only a select few to advance while being resentful to those with "success" and, ultimately, we get re-elected. It's not enough to convince people to vote for us (reasonable minded people won't) so we have to "create" the "conditions" for which people will listen to us. So, we keep them stupid and poor and trapped in a ghetto or trailer park while telling them "hope is on the way". We need to tax people more in order to keep prices low and employment high. How does this work, you ask? I have no idea.... but someone somewhere is stupid enough to buy it. If you opened a shop up and charged 5.99 for all your products and I take 4.99 in taxes, you will lower your prices in order to stay in business, right? Yes you would! But why I really don't know... it just works. Taxing you into prosperity works. It works because you will not dare take the risk to open another business after losing everything... especially if your business doesn't improve your upward mobility or put food on the table. So in the end your choice is to become unionized, paying your dues and not being able to afford anything that might help you pull yourself out of your economic situation (other than voting for the Party... which in the end won't help either but you will feel good that we are telling you that we are here to help, which is a lie, mind you - a noble lie). I hope this makes perfect sense to you now. If you need a good example of our policies working to maximum effiecency all you have to do is drive through WV. Yes, good paved roads and villages upon village of trailers and low-end hovels... with, of course, a nice mansion on top of every hill (party boss or union leader... my Uncle was one them and a Democrat to the end (((no joking!!!))) ).

We also need to make our military stronger... and the only way to do that is to cut funding.

We need balance budgets... and the only way to do that is to dip into social-security to pay for our programs.

We need more programs... and the only way to do that is to raise taxes.

We need a better image around the world... and the only way to do that is to elect us Democrats. Although most of our allies are turning to conservatives for leadership which is rather odd. But do not be discouraged, socialism still works regardless! Who needs Canada, France and Germany when we got Hugo down south! Oh, who needs Austraila as well? I'm sure there are others that I'm forgetting but who cares! All we need is Hugo, Fidel, Kim Jong Il and Ahmadinejad to like us! They are what counts the most!

Blue Bell wrote:Three kids later put a halt to such self-indulgencies, and I was reduced to economy cars.

OH MAH DARWIN! You see, everyone! You see! If Comrade Blue Bell had Choice in her day she wouldn't be burdened with all these... these.... things! Ugh, reduced to economy cars because of The Children! Disgusting and downright shameful! DAMN THAT GEORGE BUSH! I feel your pain, Blue Bell, because the children my ex-wife (my sixth one) was going to have (going to have are the key words here) were Choiced out of existence... so I got to keep my '76 corvette, my money and hookers every weekend ( I divorced her afterwards... and if she had the parasites I still would have divorced her and would've skipped out on child support, let someone else foot that bill). They were Choiced out so that I (and her) could continue our comfortable lifestyle free of responsibilty for our actions. Mmmm... I feel bad jumping all over you now, you must have payed a fortune trying to provide them with all the things you didn't have growing up... which is wrong, completely wrong! We shouldn't have to provide for our children or want "better things" for them. No, they should unionized by the time they're nine and voting Democrat. Also, they should be happy to have less than you because you could've easily had them Choiced out like I did with my potential children. Our goal should be providing for complete strangers with drug addictions, class envy and wants - not our own children! That nice crack addict down the road from me, who has been into rehab several times, needs a new BMW... and only you, Blue Bell, can give it to him! Your hard work should go to him and not your children, yourself, or some church/charity/crap group that will actually try to give him help AND guidance. No no no no... that money belongs to the government and a public servant in D.C who will be happy to assist him. That's progress, Blue Bell. That is the Amerikan way! Coercion is better than charity because we can suck more out of you with brute force and threats. We will MAKE YOU GENEROUS, comrade! We have a whole agency to do it too... it's called the IRS.

I hope this all makes perfect sense to you!

--Meow

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Hey Chairman, here's some good news designed especially for you to help you in raising some extra pocket ca$h:

Hustler Offers $1 Million for Sex Smut on Congress

From today's Newsmax >>

- If you have had an illicit sexual encounter with a current member of the United States Congress or a high-ranking government official and have documented evidence to prove it - you just might be a Democrat voter!

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Blue Bell wrote:
"Shovel??" Should I also bring a BUCKET??

here is relevance of "Shovel" explained...

http://www.thepeoplescube.com/red/viewt ... =42#Shovel

Chairman M. S. Punchenko

Once again you are spouting reactionary filth in the face of people who wish to cure you. Those savings could have done better things like pay for a crack or meth addiction, a new pair of pricey Prada stilletto heels or... and this one is important... set up a Hip Hop recording studio in the inner-city to allow a progressive child the means to create progressive profanity laden music for collective enjoyment. But no, you had to buy something for yourself to appease your selfish appetite. How many Little People had to suffer for you to drive down the road, sunglasses and all, hair blowing in the wind and a huge grin on your face? How many? Five? Ten? A Trillion!?!? Yes, trillions of people have suffered and we have the data to prove it.


Dear Chairman Punchenko,

I fear that I must inform you that I have transgressed and regressed horribly in my treatment at the KMTC. I must confess that I have been caught up in a web of self deceit by giving in to the wicked philosophies and practices of the Selfish Right. I have unforgivably failed the People, the Children, and the Democratic Party. I have failed… DO YOU HEAR ?? FAILED !! I seek your wisdom and sage advice.

Yesterday… Oh, HOW can I tell you? How can I confess that, in a moment of weakness and uncontrolled selfishness, I drove my '93 Chevy Cavalier to the Bill Utter Ford – Mercury Dealership and traded it in on a 2007 Ford Taurus Sedan?? YES !! I DID THAT !! How could I have committed such a heinous and unpatriotic crime against the PEOPLE ?? Never mind that my dear little Chevy had begun to often growl in pain in traffic, that the A/C had stopped working, the passenger window wouldn't roll up or down, the paint was peeling, and that she barely made it into the car lot… where she coughed and died a solemn and tragic death. She'll make a nice little heap of scrap metal… Sigh.

But that's no excuse !! I should not have bought that new Ford Taurus !! Why did I not deny myself that unforgivable personal luxury? I could easily have walked (or hiked up my skirt and rode a bike) the 4 miles to and from work each day, and brown-bagged peanut butter/jelly sandwiches for lunch. I should have saved my money and spread it amongst the People, the Children, the Party… Oh… and the Pledges to Hillary and Barak Obama !!

Comrade Punchenko, I feel I have FAILED MISERABLY in following the glorious pathways and benevolent guidance and teachings of the selfless people of the Karl Marx Treatment Center !! What shall I do? OH WISE ONE… WHAT SHALL I DO ??!!

Please advise.
Blue Bell

S.A.F. Marshal Pravda wrote:Blue Bell wrote:
"Shovel??" Should I also bring a BUCKET??

here is relevance of "Shovel" explained...

http://www.thepeoplescube.com/red/viewt ... =42#Shovel

Dear Comrade Pravda,

Thank you for the explanation of the symbolism of the "Shovel." Indeed, I feel that in my case, a "Bucket" will also come in handy.

Blue Bell

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Comrade Blue Bell wrote:Yesterday… Oh, HOW can I tell you? How can I confess that, in a moment of weakness and uncontrolled selfishness, I drove my '93 Chevy Cavalier to the Bill Utter Ford – Mercury Dealership and traded it in on a 2007 Ford Taurus Sedan?? YES !! I DID THAT !!

Shame, comrade Blue Bell! Now the environment will greatly suffer as you gleefully tool around in your new gas-guzzling Ford Taurus. Children are suffocating in the exhaust as we speak and Algore is frowning on you from atop his carbon emission cloud way up in the heavens. But fear not... I, in all my infinite altruistic wisdom, have a solution for you.

Comrade Blue Bell, I want you to take your new Taurus, drive to the U.S/Mexico border, and wait. Yes, I want you to wait for a Benevolent Migrant Worker to cross and I want you, comrade Blue Bell, to offer him your new 2007 Ford Taurus. I'm sure he will thank you for your noble sacrifice and call you gringo afterwards, as he should, mind you. After you do that I want you to take a carbon pledge and swear to the Goracle himself that you will NEVER EVER EVER drive an automobile again. No, instead you will walk to where you have to go... and if you're incapable of walking you will just have to find someone else to walk for you (no power chairs, they pollute Mother Earth as well). And if you want to score some real points, I suggest that you also give this Benevolent Migrant Worker your house and whatever money you have in your bank account (it will save us a few dimes from having to do it ourselves). I also want you to pay for his/her/it's health insurance as well... even if that means you will have to go with out it. It's for the Common Good and we must all sacrifice (except for me, of course).

The Dr. Phil of Socialism,

- Chairman Meowsevich S. Punchenko

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Meow,

Blue Bell not only committed a Carbon crime, but by her very weakness has also committed a Thought crime. This should be addressed as well. I recommend 2 extra weeks at the KMTC followed by 1 week at the JFC where advanced electro-shock therapy will, hopefully, put a stop to her anti-socialist behavior once and for all!

--
Zampolit Boris Sukavich Blokhayev
H'08

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If you think that National Healthcare means you'll be in the same waiting room as Tovariches Kennedy or Peloksi

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If you have read this thread twice and laughed at each post, you might have just become a Democratic voter.



 
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