Oh Bill won't you buy me a Mercedes Benz.
My friends all drive porsches, I'm flat broke again.
Worked hard all my lifetime, to help you get in.
So oh Bill won't you buy me a Mercedes Benz

Oh Bill won't you get me to the house in DC.
Begging for dollars will bring me a victory.
I'll wait by the red phone at night until 3.
So Bill lord won't you get me to the house in DC.

Oh Bill won't you buy me a President gown.
No pant suits for you Bill, please don't let me down.
Prove that you love me, I'll let you fool around.
Oh Bill won't you buy me a President gown.

Oh Bill won't you buy me a Mercedes Benz
My friends all drive porsches, I'm flat broke again.
Worked hard all my lifetime, to help you get in.
So Bill won't you buy me a Mercedes Benz

I'd like to sing a song of great import to the ummah

Allah, won't you buy me a Mercedez Benz
Mah friends all ride camels, I must make "ay"-mends
Stayed chaste all my lifetime, no help from the imam
So Allah, won't you buy me a Mercedez Benz

Allah, won't you buy me a brand new chador
My old one shows forearm, I look like "a" whore
I wait to restore honor each day after four
So Allah, won't you buy me a brand new chadoe

Allah, won't you buy me a day at Bazaar
I'm counting on you, 'Lah; show me you're akbar
Prove you're all mighty and burn that Jew's car
Allah, won't you buy me a day at Bazaar

(Kull Mu'amiin!)*

Allah, won't you buy me a Mercedez Benz
My friends all ride camels, I must make "ay"-mends
Stayed true all my lifetime, no help from the imam
Ya Allah, won't you buy me a Murr-SAY-deez Benz

(Khalass .... Ullalalalalalalalalalalalah ...)

*All believers!