Comrades, our musical leader and hero of the People's Children ™ R.O.C.K. in the USSA has not been seen in some time. Party officials even when "encouraged" with additional rations of vodka cannot specify if he has been relocated to a different work camp, or if he has been promoted to non-person and eliminated from the system.

Diligent searching of the Interwebs has turned up a possible answer. Comrade ROCK is lost in a form of purgatory between "guitar porn" and "gun porn" (two of three favorite variations of porn)...



Positive identification has not been established, but if the artisan shown here has a pool full of butterscotch pudding, we may be on the right track...

Yeah, where IS our R.O.C.K.? I've missed him. Show up, Dude! We've not had enough of you.

Pamalinsky wrote:Yeah, where IS our R.O.C.K.? I've missed him. Show up, Dude! We've not had enough of you.

I'm not sure, but rumors around Shed 5 say that he's somewhere between a gun and a hard place. Something to do with french fries, axle grease, and kinky mistresses, I dunno. What I do know is that he'd better show up or I'll report him for sleeping on the assembly line and get the secret police after him. Then we'll find out where he's been hiding all this time...

Comrade Stierlitz wrote: I'll report him for sleeping on the assembly line and get the secret police after him. Then we'll find out where he's been hiding all this time...

Comrades, the Happy Keepers are actually looking for him currently since he did not show up at the assembly line. We are checking band tours to see if he got caught up in one.

Comrade Stierlitz wrote:... Something to do with french fries, axle grease, and kinky mistresses, I dunno.

Probably one "Kinky Elsie, who was always game for that sort of thing and had me by the I'm-not-going-to-mentions at the time and my hands were tied, in more ways than one, as it were, and so I had to give her a sharp nudge with my foot. Happy days."

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R.O.C.K. in the USSA is on tour in support of his new album!

R.O.C.K. changed his avatar and bought a new guitar...
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and John changed his name again!
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Putout, thank you so much for clearing up this mystery about R.O.C.K.'s absence.

The original album cover shows a guy in “deep” thought (because he is looking away from the camera)

Everything on the new album cover in radioactive green tells us where he has gone: Into outer space!

I think this is a good move on his part, PR-wise. He is evolving with the times!

P.S. I do hope he is O.K.

Rumors, always rumors and more rumors!!

Usually true, of course. And if not, most should be.

But those of my demise are gravely mistaken. I am still R.O.C.K.ing in the USSA, but primarily in The Land of Twitter of late.

Fortunately, our dear comrade Olga Photoshopova was able to drag me over here let me know of the Concerns of the Party, and here I am, for a brief but short time.

Time IS fleeting, comrades. Madness takes its toll.

Beet vodka all around! (on Olga, of course). No - wait - not ON Olga, I meant she's paying for it!

Next round: Leninade!

Hehehe... I have a bottle of Leninade sitting on my desk at work :) Next to The People's Cube, of course!

R.O.C.K. in the USSA wrote:Hehehe... I have a bottle of Leninade sitting on my desk at work :) Next to The People's Cube, of course!

I noticed you were commissioned a new picture comrade.

Indeed, although I actually got it off a dead rattle-privileged musical snake :)

You are entitled to a desk? What measure of privilege is this? While it's good to know you are still rocking, I have my concerns...One can only imagine the discussion in the house one evening, "honey, I'm taking the Ibanez to the woodshop...bring me a beer and a sammich".Honey would giggle and say "you're so clever, normally you say woodSHED as a quiet place to practice..." And then she would begin gathering beer and sandwich making materials while removing articles of clothing...

I always had a feeling there were Party cameras (as there should be, of course).

Now I know for sure.

mmmmmmm, sammiches :)

R.O.C.K. in the USSA wrote:I always had a feeling there were Party cameras (as there should be, of course).

Now I know for sure.

mmmmmmm, sammiches :)

R.O.C.K. in the USSA wrote: Time IS fleeting, comrades. Madness takes its toll.

Beet vodka all around! (on Olga, of course). No - wait - not ON Olga, I meant she's paying for it!

..But listen closely....not for very much longer....


Sorry. It's kind of like Roger Rabbit and Shave and a Haircut for me.Nice to see you old friend! Don't stay away long.

Comrades,

I, Captain Craptek - founder, leader, and only member of The People's Pixel Equality Team - have had a vision! Verily, I say,.. a vision that came to me in the tranquil solitude of total stupor - spring hibernation,.. a vision so terrible, so mind numbingly chaotic, that it's most horrific details all but vanished upon awakening.

Comrade Linen's post regarding the movie “Pixels” must have stimulated my tiny cortex into casting Putout, ROCK and me in supporting starring roles. I can remember leaping from a helicopter, descending slowly into the frenzied mob below.


After donning our clever disguises, Putout and I took a moment to evaluate the situation. Then, in preparation for the upcoming battle we spent the next hour in an abandoned motel plotting our strategy.


After emerging from our planning session Putout seemed revitalized, energized, and ready to take on the Pixel menace single handed. To show my support, and in an effort to bolster her self esteem, I remained in the background offering verbal encouragement throughout most of the battle.


Off in the distance stood ROCK, trusty GATTAR at the ready, defiantly blocking the path of the crazed alien Pac-Man. How noble, how proud, how majestic! I turned briefly toward Putout yelling, “Look, it's ROCK!” Then, in an instant,...he was gone!


I awoke suddenly. Only those fragments of my vision outlined above remain clear - the awful truth still lurks deep in the Mystery File Folder. <sniff> Sorry,...but I can't go on...

All hail the return of my newest best long-lost feared-dead, but only hibernating friend, the flying squirrel. Welcome back, I was almost certain you had eaten a tainted nut, placed by the Gideons of ACORN, but it apprears you were just having a dream that you were away on business... Sorry to hear about R.O.C.K.

Konservative_Punk wrote:All hail the return of my newest best long-lost feared-dead, but only hibernating friend, the flying squirrel. Welcome back, I was almost certain you had eaten a tainted nut, placed by the Gideons of ACORN, but it apprears you were just having a dream that you were away on business... Sorry to hear about R.O.C.K.

Comrade Punk! A greeting from my newest, oldest, and latest, though oddly quaffed buddy is most welcome indeed! Yes, far away... that's it... that's where I've been. I believe a mysterious someone spiked my libation with a bad ice cube,... anyway, I'm hoping to remain conscious long enough to make the trip back to my nest later this evening. And don't worry about ROCK - Pac-Man pixels pale in the presence of sheer wattage!

Truer words have never rarely only once in a while been spoken, Comrade Captain - indeed, The People's Wattage trumps all, especially when it goes to 11.

There are rumors that with SovTek tubes it occasionally goes to 12, but those are only rumors to be sure, passed around a campfire along with a bottle of beet vodka and a cheap Mexican Stratocaster.

Still, my explosion and subsequent pixel expansion (pictured above) was merely a clever ruse on my part, as those who know me well would, of course, expect. I had UltraTopSecretMega-Shiny™ Party business at which my attendance was mandatory, and it was best for the safety of all that I appear to have been blasted to smithereens.

And yet, here I am.

Such are the wonders of modern communist technology.

Carry on, comrades - we've a capitalist world yet remaining to fully conquer, and it's best we do it before the muzwacks beat us to it!

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Ohhhhhhhhhhhhh... George is so precious and curious!
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Curiosity killed the cat, bit indecision kills more squirrels...you've decided to return, I see.


<off>

Welcome back

Comrade Ivan,

True,.. I've returned...escaped the clutches of the "Reaper" once again! Why do I bother, you ask? Simple,... to provide my dear Comrade Ivan the Stakhanovets a ready object to abuse,... a target upon which to focus his scorn, ridicule, ill wishes and unfounded accusations to his heart's content. Then of course, there's Putout... Yes,... it's good to be back!