Comrades,

I have never been much of a writer (I hope the Red Square will edit my think), however I would be remiss if I didn't create a topic to recognize our newest self proclaimed comrade, 'The Champion of Women'.

Let me be the first to thank 'The Champion of Women' for addressing half of the accusers that were lying and half of the accusers who misinterpreted his actions, whatever they were.

Yesterday's address was clearly an apology, however no apology should be necessary because nothing happened. Actually, I'm not sure what I am discussing, other than I think 'The Champion of Women' is a fantastic self proclaimed name.

Regardless of my ramblings, it was a bold step which clearly demonstrated he is the true 'Champion of Women.'

What Franken meant to say is that his next job will be at the ladies' department at the Champion sportswear company (a subsidiary of Hanes), testing new designs for durability and resistance to penetration and groping.

[img]/images/various_uploads/Franken_Champion_Women.jpg[/img]

The glorious 'Champion of Women' pattern can be universally and strictly formulaically expanded!

Say hello to 'Champion of X'!

To become a 'Champion of X', the aspirant has to:
a) publicly apologize for not heretofore championing the cause X
b) soothe all those who may or may not feel victims of the aspirant's non-champ stance, see a)
c) steps a) and b) are mandatory even if - indeed, especially when - the # of victims, see b), is 0.

The above done, the aspirant is then proclaimed a People's Champion of X.

Thereby the now-Champion is 1) granted 15 Minutes of Fame in a Late Night Prog-Show of his chosing, next is 2) given a copy of the latest historiographic oeuvre of Ma'am Next POTUS 2020 (or even 2018) and finally 3) entitled to one (numerically: 1) visit in an inclusive, class- and race equalized and non-victimizing bordello of his chosen gender flavor, full program covered.

Invisible penis??

This whole entire Al Franken thing smells like well-scripted democrat party Kabuki theater to me.

Why do we not have a 'Champion of Women' medal for brave, heroic comrades like the good Comrade Senator Al?

Ok. That's enough.

I denounce Al Franken. There. I said it.

In the days of scandals involving sexual misconduct and people taking the easy way out by resigning, Big Al has become just another #metoo and joined the parade of quitters heading for the door.

Where is the open display of defiance and unified party leadership? Where is the counterattack and victim-blaming against the "bimboes"? Where is the multi-billion dollar show trial where we can learn what the meaning of "is" is? Did nobody learn ANYTHING during the Clinton Administration (his, not hers)? Does anyone remember Senator Ted Kennedy and the "sandwich" on the restaurant floor? Dammit, Party Leaders are ENTITLED! Al Franken is not a leader, he's a participant.

So that's it Al. Pack up your gear, collect your participation trophy, go by the concession stand and tell them you were a Minnesota Senator and they'll give you your participant's snow-cone. See you next season, ya pansy; now get off our field.

Oh well, I guess he can be the champion at Champion.

Because I don't think the owner / CEO of Columbia Sportswear would put up with his bullshit:
She is One Tough Mother, you know. Actually made her kid walk through a running car wash once.

This thread is funnier than an AIDS infected woman at a pol cocktail party wearing crotchless panties.