Most people know that Americans benefit from high taxes, powerful unions, limited consumer choice, and strong government control. But most people lack the training to fully understand why we derive benefits from these policies, and why government control over public anything results in unsurpassable quality. To remedy your "knowledge deficit" you can ask us any question you choose, and it will be explained by the legendary Professor Paul Krugman in a language that you can understand. From the evils of profiteering, corporatism, and economic exploitation to the rewards of regulation, social justice, and community/stakeholder involvement, Professor Krugman will use his agile mind to clarify the otherwise intimidating field of economics.

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Comrade Krugman PhD^3,

According to a post at the blog of the reactionary "economist" Dan Luskin, you have been photographed smiling beside Bushitler. Are you a victim of the vast right-wing Photoshop conspiracy, has your Nobel heightened your prestige and your height, or has Bushitler shrunken? I will worship your economic knowledge regardless.

Dear Professor Kurgman, PhD^3,

knowing your interest in academia and market failure i am pleased to supply some material you could apply your intellects upon. While browsing the internets (through a state-sponsored connection i might add) i came upon a lovely academic paper titled "A Profitless Endeavor: Phishing as Tragedy of the Commons" ( ... ragedy.pdf). While my lacking of PhDs and limited cognitive ability prevented me from comprehending all the advanced formulae and graphics i hope you will find them pleasing. See, from a common-sense-average-joe perspective i see a definite need for some (strong) government action to prevent the genocide (is working for less than minimum wage anything but a genocide?) of the phishers but i am not sure on the implementation details. Will unionizing help? Should Obama propose tax incentives to help encourage businessmen to keep those phishing and bot-net writing jobs here in America? Please elaborate.

С уважением,


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Dear Professor Kurgman, PhD^3,

During the Incarnation tomorrow of His O'liness, everything will change and the true believers, the 200-proof progressives, will be levitated to a higher plane of pure socialism and the complete unlinking of actions and consequences.

Will you on occasion condescend to descend back to the earth and enlighten us?