Andrea Mitchell's Hidden Hearing Talent Matches Looks

Veteran reporter Andrea Mitchell has recently revealed a secret talent that many have had a sneaking suspicion she has had for years after getting their first look at her.

Andrea is able to detect and hear sound at higher frequencies than most normal humans - and she recently revealed this on the Friday edition of her eponymous program Andrea Mitchell Reports.

The veteran broadcast journalist maintained that Newt Gingrich, Tea party members and Republicans in general deploy language with coded racial overtones that only she can detect and hear and that they are racially-tinged "dog whistles."

Her talent, now revealed to be augmented with hidden super canine hearing abilities in addition to her hidden stunning looks, truly makes Andrea the total journalistic package.



 

Andrea Mitchell and Jimmy Carter both have this super ability to detect undertones of racism and they root it out with careful and unbiased gloriousness. There are code words that they know to look for like "personal responsibility" and "individual liberty" that are thinly veiled attacks on people of color. The Party must form a new bureau to stop this sort of racism, it shall be called Regulators of Audible Cues Inaudible to the Simpleton Majority or R.A.C.I.S.M. A fieldguide will be presented to all state run media outlets for reference when analyzing the speech of capitalist pigs.
 

Our people are vastly superior to their people in many ways, unfortunately none of them provable except we don't have red necks.
 

It is no secret.... dogs have better hearing than human. And if she isn't a dog, I do not know who is!! humm, wait, is that what I meant to say??? Superior hearing . . . dogs and vampires. . . . maybe she is a vampire!?

Well, whatever, who's up for a vodka!?
 

Judge Fraulein Pulloskies

It is no secret.... dogs have better hearing than human. And if she isn't a dog, I do not know who is!! humm, wait, is that what I meant to say??? Superior hearing . . . dogs and vampires. . . . maybe she is a vampire!?

Well, whatever, who's up for a vodka!?

dear Comradette, Judge, Frauline, It is so good to see you again. If you are back, we def need to have that Vodka. (mmm mmm good)
 

Arf Arf! My dog is speaking! I Wuv Wooo!
I'm hearing the dog whistles now!