Chairman Meow wrote:

A-Ten-Hut!

Who is that colored fellow and why is he running away from the White House? Did he just bomb the place. I sure hope President Nixon was not in at the time.

Look what The Peoples Comrade and I did this week-end!

(...among other things!)

Yeah, well, good luck with that refund there, comrades. Refunds are hard to come by these days. Good luck!

Wait! - Wait! What about those of us who never received Beet of the Week?!? How are WE to get our fully equal refunds with no awards to turn in??

Is this like those gun buy backs where they give you $5.00 and a McDonald's gift certificate for your $1200.00 firearm?

I think we should all at least get the McDonald's gift certificate! PINKIEEEEEEEE!!!!

R.O.C.K. in the USSA wrote:Wait! - Wait! What about those of us who never received Beet of the Week?!? How are WE to get our fully equal refunds with no awards to turn in??

LAIKA'S HEADLINE: White House to American children: Sequester causes layoffs among hens that lay Easter eggs; union-wage Easter Bunnies to be replaced by Mexican Chupacabras

What? No! I demand A Beet of the Week(TM)! In fact, I'm Entitled(TM) To one! Damn this sequestration, can't we stop paying some soldiers or something instead?

https://www.facebook.com/photo.php?fbid=561273357239257&set=a.249088301791099.66544.129879573711973&type=1&theater

Rethuglikkkan Sequestration forces Obama Administration to close 149 airport towers.

Joe "The Clown" Biden laughs and says not to worry from his $585,000.00 a night Paris hotel; suggests pilots fire a couple of blasts from a double barrel shotgun out the window every once in a while.

What is a poor newfound comrade to do? I have joined the Party too late to ever be even considered for this prestigious award. Now when will I have my chance to break out the teleprompters and present one of my many pre-prepared, Party authorized speeches?

Beets can serve many functions, Comrade Bear - "Beet of the Week" being but one. I recommend looking into the various recipes, body lotions, sauces, cosmetics, and distillates made possible by this versatile vegetable. Above all, be patient. Beet of the Week will be reinstated after the mid-term elections when Dear Leader takes rightful control of the budget.

So we have this new Comrade Bear? Who is up on the game regulations? Is Red Bear good barbecued? Or is red bear just too nasty to eat? Or is it on the shoot and release list?

#FakeNews from official organ of propaganda of the Peoples Republic of New Yorkistan1/30/17 crossword[attachment=2]schumer.JPG[/attachment][/url]13 Down describes the color of beets as "red"[attachment=1]beets.JPG[/attachment][/url]
yet The Peoples Cube official "Beet of the Week" bumper sticker depicts the color as purple.

Comrade Lysenko,

Have you forgotten the importance of diversity?

The color Red comes in many variations: Cherry Red, Blood Red, Tomato Red, Pantone 185 Red (including hundreds of other reds), Pink, and, yes, Lysenko, Beet Red.

They're all Red. See how that works?

Diversity. That's the ticket.

Should not the answer to 43 Across ("Stand-up comic Schumer") be "Chuck" or "Charles"? But some capitalist plot has limited the number of letters to three.

Commissarka Pinkie wrote:

Kommisar Kaputnik wrote:I must denounce all of you for feeling down that you haven't won the beet of the week or even wanting to compete for the award! Comrades, competition is what the rethuglikkkans want you to be lured into! You must resist! If one receives the award, we should all receive the award, so I must denounce the award giver for not awarding the award to all of us deserving/undeserving the award.
Report to the train station with your shovel! First one there gets denounced again so go no faster nor slower than the other comrades!

Kommisar Kaputnik, you might be new here, but that's no excuse. No one--but NO ONE--ever denounces me and walks away on their own two feet. They might crawl away on all fours, groaning and leaving a trail of blood and teeth and who knows what else in their wake, but they never walk away from me.

WHACK!!!

Fortunately, sequestration did not take away my shovel.

You'll also note that no one else here warned you of the consequences of denouncing Commissarka Pinkie. That should teach you to henceforth confine your denouncements to those of your own lowly stature.

Comrade Commissarka Pinkie... No worries, dear sister-in-arms,With the uptick in membership (I can tell you - we are almost required regardless of behaviour to short-sheet some of our more junior Commissars because we simply cannot keep enough sheets in the laundry... We are short of washing proles, most of whom are not clean enough to touch the sheets anyway, and some of the newer commissars, in a fit of pique at so many pink hats marching instead of red, raided the linen stores so they could wet them down and hang them on wire fences and apply electrical charges to some of the newer, less well-tortur... well-beate... well-taught newer juniour workers (How I miss Laika's inspiring Friday night teachings and 80's retro-dance party transmissions to the Juniour Cosmonauts... all of them so polished, especially their newly issued tin-foil hats specially designed to pick up his signals... AND SO DAMN WELL-BEHAVED!!!!)... But these new Commissars and some of the proles... I wanted to freaking kill some I was somewhat annoyed but the exuberance is hard not to laugh maniacally at along with and these are skills they need to be taught to learn (as in, 'that'll' learn ya")... part "get it out of their youthful systems"... "part hazing", really, so I find it hard to be too mad on both counts since they've clearly learned from their own punishment korrektion teachings...Nevertheless Sister-Comrade, you are korrekt as usual. Nobody denounces Pinkie and gets away with it. As this is a post-elektion period, we have been busy putting necroproxies into storage for the next election cycle and doing touch-ups, but we can always use new ones to replace the old ones that are really getting dinged up and should just go in the wood chipper and into the compost by now. So, with your say-so and Our Glorious Incarnadine Trapezoid's okie-dokie, Housekeeping will happily send Limo Service to pick up miscreant and dull his shovel before teaching new prole to sharpen it. I know my absences are irksome, but as my fluke is healing well, I could use something to get me back in shape... a bit of the old, "Oh that Officer?... That's just beet juice! You didn't know dolphins ate beets?... Oh! But we do! And I'm so sorry I took that corner by the elementary school at 80... That sound?... No, no... we're actually trying to teach one of our youngsters to sound human. I know it sounds like someone kicking too, but our calves must swim with us non-stop for the first period of their lives, so he's just practicing... Yes, he's a strong one. Thank you officer! I really do appreciate the warning, and I'm glad you understand that I just have to get these... ahem... groceries... in the freezer... before they thaw... " And if Red gives us the okay on the op, we'll do girls night out with Comrade Sister Pamalinsky... Wall or no wall, Mama's havin' a margarita... I've been hooked up to this ridiculous IV long enough... Kiss Kiss, Bang Bang... Sister Sister...ps... as for all this in one big chunk of text... IT is working on it... quickly... very quickly...

Dearest Sista MO,

Comrade Tovarich and I have this immediate response.
; • )
More to come later.
You have a knack for making people happy, girlfriend! Keep it up!

Comradette Sister Massively Opiated,

It is glorious to see you creating truth anew! As my obligations to the Party have been redirected and redefined, I expect to engage more with the Current Truth. As holds of the Lightbringer's enlightenment and the Former Directive's obligations wane, my return to Party life will wax, and not like Comrades Lenin and Mao!

Pelagically and proletarianly ours,

Comrade_Tovarich

RedDiaperette wrote:Should not the answer to 43 Across ("Stand-up comic Schumer") be "Chuck" or "Charles"? But some capitalist plot has limited the number of letters to three.

The Enemy of the People Imperialist Encyclopedia Britannica smears Mao's brilliant Cultural Revolution as a "difficult period" [img]https://[/img]These evil capitalist reactionaries try to make it sound like abusing elderly citizensand humiliating old revolutionaries is a bad thing

Dear Comrade Lysenko , you need not worry Minitru will still tell you the Korrect truth

Impartial,Free,Fair wrote: Still ashamed of my part in Mao's Cultural Revolution

2 November 2016 Last updated at 01:15 GMT

In an effort to head off challenges to his leadership, Chairman Mao unleashed a wave of unrest that swept across China in the 1960s.

He wanted to root out opposition and rid the country of any semblance of old Chinese culture, social values and history.

At the forefront of the Cultural Revolution were the Red Guards - young, radical students and fanatical supporters of Mao and his circle.

Parents and teachers were vilified and in some cases beaten and killed. Old temples, architecture and literature were destroyed too.

Saul Yeung was a member of the Red Guards. He spoke to Witness about his memories of that time and the guilt he still carries.

Now doesn't that sound much nicer ?