Despite heroic efforts of our esteemed Comrade Red Rooster,




... the Coffee Party has failed to eclipse the bigoted, hate-mongering, tea-bagging Tea-Parties. How could our Latte-Drinking, Prius-Driving, Wine-Sipping, Veggie-Eating, Birkenstock-Wearing, Pot-Smoking, Tobacco-Hating, Planet-Saving, Union-Touting, Property-Redistributing, Meat-Hating, Entitlement-Loving, Hipness-Motivated Youthful Supporters fail to join and support the Coffee Party and attend its rallies?

What has happened?

My fellow Comrades, we need to quickly learn how to motivate the ones we are waiting for to remember that they are the ones they are waiting for to be the ones we are wating for but it seems they are waiting for us to remind them that we are waiting for them to remember we are waiting for them to be the ones we are wating for by remembering they are the ones they are waiting for.

Part of the problem is that in the Bush-Caused Economic Disaster we're experiencing, too many of them have graduated from college with highly valuable degrees in Sociology, Cultural Studies, Pantheopianism, Whoreticulture, Communications, Feminism, Genderism, and many more but yet have been forced by the Bush-Caused Economic Disaster to accept jobs as waiters, and have thus become accustomed to waiting-- hence, they are currently in a confused state "waiting" for whoever they're waiting for and thus not being they ones they are waiting for and thereby not being the ones we are waiting for.

What we need is a Waiters United campaign to awaken the Waiters to remind them that we are waiting for them to remember that in order for them to be the ones we're waiting for they must remember that they are the ones they have been waiting for, but this will be quite a challenge because they are too busy waiting on others who are waiting for them to wait on them.

How can we reverse this dangerous trend?

Obviously, we must ban employment of waiters in restaurants and bars by requiring all such businesses to become "self-service." This would force customers to exercise by serving themselves and would also have the added benefit of helping us combat the obesity epidemic.

What would those unemployed waiters then do? Obviously, they would make themselves available to attend our Coffee Party demonstrations and demand that the government create REAL jobs for them in their chosen fields and thus free them from the unfairness of the capitalist system in not making available to them jobs in the fields that fit their lifestyle preferences. What could be more fair?

Now, let's get to work. There is preciously little time left between now and November 2, 2010.


--Fearless Leader

Blase' youth, I told ya. We carried this pop culture crap too far. And Obama isn't helping matters by suggesting we increase the length of the school year. And Michelle's drive to eliminate candy, chocolate milk and force the kids to eat broccoli and turnip greens is a disaster in the making.

We need to lower the voting age to 14, offer gov. subsidized skate boards, free candy, a shorter school year, less homework assignments and tax free cigarettes and snuff. Oh and Red Bull and beer.

Someone may want to let the CP know that not only did they Dems steal their platform, but their initials as well. And for a failed cause at that!

Excellent points, Comrade Fearless. My only contribution here can be this picture we made, explaining this concept to voters BEFORE they brought Obama into office.

The solution appears to be exactly as our exalted Red Square recently testified before Congrefs- we must simply replace this failing bloc of voters with the illegal/migrant voters before it's too late! Amnesty and social justice, now!https://thepeoplescube.com/current-truth/red-square-s-answer-to-colbert-s-testimony-in-congress-t6144.html

Our Glorious Leader is correct! Our Glorious Leader is always correct! The failure of the progressive Coffee Party can only be attributed to wreckers. How else do you explain the failure to ignite a people's uprising when the Coffee Party is serving kick ass jams (to use a decadent phrase of the socially parasitic exploiter) like this:



To use the immortal words of Comrade 5, You can't stop a movement without the Kaopectate of subversion! Here is a typical wrecker comment on this video:

"Freaking hilarious. Bearded Marxist with microphone mixes the angst of the suburbs with the worn out whining of the degenerate old left to the delight of aging hippies who can't even clap in unison,.

And my my lookit all the pasty pink people. More diversity in the Tea Parties."

Citithens! fffff-Poultry-th sssss-Prophecy-thhhh....


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