First of all, let me wish everyone a very Merry Marxmas!

Now, in all seriousness, I must turn to an issue that greatly troubles me: the complacency I'm starting to see take root in some radicals. I implore you, my fellow progressives, to guard against being lulled into a state of cheerful inertia; the war on Xmas and H-kah is by no means over. While we have made significant strides in marginalizing and secularizing the contemptible Judeo-Christian celebrations, we still have much work to do, comrades--much work, indeed.

One place to start is with the expression "the holidays". It's time to raise the bar higher! Just look at the word "holiday" for christssakes (whoops; see how insidious this crap is). It's a colloquial elision of the words "holy" and "day" (holiday = holy + day). Doesn't that just make you cringe? Who are they to tell us what is holy and what is not! Thus, the word "holiday" still imparts a sense of legitimacy to the offending traditions and is far too redolent of them to be of much utility.

Of course, I would be remiss not to acknowledge the small semantic victory we have achieved in conditioning broad swaths of the populace to use the expression as a more inclusive alternative. It was a good start; however, we have thus far accomplished little more than watering down a still potent opiate that continues to hold sway over the minds of myriads of thought criminals.

We must not compromise our radical principles; we must continue to hammer the class enemy. We must call "the holidays" what they really are: The dark December days of bourgeois gods and goods…the season in which the two most oppressive religions in the world collude with the forces of capitalism to exploit the proletariat and reinforce decadent Western cultural values. Better yet, we must fight to criminalize any mention of "the holidays" as Hate Speech and purge all references to them from the People's History.

As always, deconstructing the meta-narratives of the reactionary ruling class…

--Dr. P

At any given moment there is an orthodoxy, a body of ideas which it is assumed that all right-thinking people will accept without question.
-George Orwell

Let's just make everyone say "Happy Wintertime!"

Kommissar Betty:
Your efforts are well intended and enthusiasm duly noted, but komrade, these are wasteful superstitious holidays of the petty bourgeoisie who only wish to advance their counter-revolutionary careers!

There is May Day and there is The Glorious Day of the Revolution, October 25. Then the Proletariat may soon celebrate Premier Hillary's Glorious day of Birth from State approved surrogate female Bolshevik incubator.

Other days off are decadent waste of the Worker's time and cannot be encouraged or tolerated. If they attempt to flee from the factories, mines or mills on the days of the pagan facist feasts then they shall be shot in the back for their counter-revolutionary ways. Though Soviet production is always more efficient then the capitalist running dog halliburton swine - output can always be improved. Eliminating these corrupting "holidays" are a great leap forward in the Revolution.

Prick up your ears folks, because the hydra-headed leviathan that you know as the Nanny State is talking. How come I don't get any love? Seriously, I give and I give and I give, and then I give some more. And what do I get in return from you people--you people who depend so greatly on my largesse? Left off the freakin' calendar of "holidays", that's what. Thanks a whole helluva lot, you bunch of ingrates. It seems that everybody but me gets a red-letter date.

There should be a national celebration in my honor. I'm not talking about some jingoistic nonsense like the Fourth of July; I want a day of reverence exclusively set aside for me, The Nanny State. So how about "Statefest" or "Poliday"? I'd even settle for "Archymas" or "BureaucracyBash". Just remember, I'm making a list and checkin' it twice. The State giveth, but I can also taketh away!

Duuhh... what's da Nanny State...?

Nanny State -

There already seems to exist The World Bureaucracy Day upon which I stumbled recently while looking for the how-to info on the proper way to celebrate Lev Trotsky's birthday:

7 January 2004
The World Bureaucracy Day International Committee, a joint venture of the PWDQ, USPS, USDA, WRPSS, UN, EU, CIS, EE, and BIPM, announced today the Forty-Third Annual World Bureaucracy Day. Bureaucrats and bureauphiles across the world engaged in traditional WB-Day festivities: filling out celebratory paperwork, exchanging copious bribes, and opening red-tape-wrapped gifts. According to the WBDIC Sub-Committee on Statistical Analysis, this WB-Day was celebrated more widely than any post-Soviet* WB-Day on record, with major festivities across the world. Go here for more details on the origins of the holiday, and tips on how to make your next WB-Day party a successful one.

https://www.angelfire.com/il2/worldomination/wbday.html

World Bureaucracy Day! Perfection! Celebrating inept needless layers of government, who do the job ten times that needs to be done once. National Redundancy Day! All at a lovingly thoroughly excessive expense to all the comrades. Very nice. I'd like to celebrate Postal Worker Aggression Day or DMV Incompetence Day. How about Sloth Union/Mafia Union Leader Day?

Though I feel Nanny States heartwrenching pain of being left out of an actual named day. Therefore as Counsel in service to the State, I declare April 1st to be Nanny State Day.

Red Square wrote:There already seems to exist The World Bureaucracy Day...

Wow, some of my dependents had a party and forgot to invite me. What ever happened to decorum and etiquette, people? This is deplorable, but typical--nobody wants a "chaperone" cramping their style at shindigs. Looks like a certain group of forgetful statists will have to spend a few months in the gulag reflecting on their "poor form".

Chistka Counselor wrote: Though I feel Nanny States heartwrenching pain of being left out of an actual named day. Therefore as Counsel in service to the State, I declare April 1st to be Nanny State Day.

You picked a fine day, Counselor. Now all the "fools" across the nation can unite and sing my praises on 1 Avril 2006. They will bow down before me, the Idol of Big Government, and make sacrifices on the alter of The Greater Good™. It'll be a hoot! We must start planning at once--there's less than four months until the inaugural celebration of Nanny State Day.

Here's an idea...the People should work every day. There are no such things as "holidays"...it never existed. The only special days are our Revolutionary Days. Therefore, whoever though of holiday should be placed on a show trial to confess their misdeeds.

Vladimir Ivanov