Image

The Temporal Reconnaissance Squad Begins Their Journey

User avatar
After the Glorious Wormhole opened up, I quickly made some changes. The old Revolutionary Red Guard was obsoleted, various leaders purged, and the survivingreorganized units were reformed as the Temporal Guards of the Revolution. After all, let's face it. There are just too many goonshighly trained troopers, regular troops, special troops, guards, revolutionaries, and whatnot running around in any proper Progressive world. Revolutionary Red Guards are so.... common. But I digress. The Temporal Guards have been directed to explore the Wormhole, the world of 2100, and look into branching off wormholes to other years between 2010 and 2100.

The first order of business was to bring back several crates of vodka for consumption. A Commissar of Time should drink thevodka of the future! After acquiring a proper buzz, the next order of business was to establish a history of the ensuing 90 years, and to ensure the future understanding of the past (our present) and of our past (their past too) meshes up completely.

For instance, while we still consider Barack Obama the 44th President of The United States, in 2049, it was found that the prior 43 presidents did not count, as they were simply privileged white men who by virtue of being part of the oppressor class, were simply keeping the oval office warm for Obama. The prior 43 presidents are called "Pre-Presidents".

Books are rather hard to find in 2100. Rather much to the relief of the Temporal Guard, information in conveyed in comic book form, or through loud and flashy videos or set to edgy music. This of course is a direct result of the Education Reform act of 2023, where it was determined that all students must learn at an equal pace, thus ensuring that even the slowest student kept pace with the smartest. As time progressed ideas like "smart" or "slow" or "stupid fucking idiot who can't even tie their shoes properly" were discouraged and finally banned by law. All citizens of the UN are given equal chance to learn at an equal level. To learn beyond the current standards of equality requires a person to submit to a background check, have party loyalty checked, and spend several years at an education camp before undergoing education beyond level 7a. The more advanced education is reserved for those deemed suitable by The Party(TM) and The UN.

Libraries are off limits to anyone who does not possess a valid Reader License. This ensures that information is equally distributed to those who are capable of processing it in an approved fashion that is not harmful to society or the state.

Reports are still coming in, as well as video chips and speeches set to strange music that sounds like a cross between East Coast Gangsta Rap, and Saudi folk music played backwards to a faster tempo and performed with Indian musical instruments.

Stay tuned for more News From The Future(TM)!


 
POST REPLY