The People's Cube - Political Satire

AUSTRALIA -- Marsupials across the continent are demanding the removal of memorials of Placentoids from public places.

Be it the Dingo, which are so threatening to the native species, chemical companies are making a deterrent from the dogs' urine, or cats, who've devastated the smaller native species - the invasive Placentoids have got to go, says the head of National Association for Advancement of Marsupial Species (NAAMS - pictured below).


"We demand reparations and removal of the memorials of the invaders," seconded a wombat, who preferred to remain anonymous. "Trim may have been a wonderful cat, but why didn't this captain hire a local quoll to keep the mice in check on his ship? Placentoids are biased towards placentoids, and that's that!"


"Every time I hop by that place, seeing that cat is like a punch in the snout!" added a pademelon, who only gave her first name as Hoppity, "That may be why I've never actually been there," she added to herself, not expecting the microphone to still be on.

But isn't trans-continental migration good? I'm so confused. Are invasive species only allowed when they replace PWOCs (people without color)?

Quokkas, however, have been banished to Rottnest Island for their speciesist claim that "All Animal Lives Matter (Even Cats)."

RedDiaperette wrote:Quokkas, however, have been banished to Rottnest Island for their speciesist claim that "All Animal Lives Matter (Even Cats)."

For some reason, I thought of Biggy Rat and Itchy Brother.

RedDiaperette wrote:Quokkas, however, have been banished to Rottnest Island for their speciesist claim that "All Animal Lives Matter (Even Cats)."

and even the lives of mythical horned rodents, matter to a Quokka. 'pelipsky - being a mythical horned rodent after all -- wonders how a comrade would go about getting the korrekt papers stamped to gain privilege to immigrate to Rottnest Island.

forelock tugging in mattering,
Jackalopelipsky
Russian Agent
#BR 549

They, marsupials, should reject the designation 'marsupial'.
Must start to self-identify as AoP, Animals of Pouch!

(And sigh, I see the next Revoolooshun in the making: 'Animals'? 'Plants'? 'Fungi'?
(Who needs that? Who forces all that divisive linguo-imperialism on cosmic masses?)

I'm hippity hoppity mad and I'm not going to take it anymore! It's about time somebody made a stand against this outrageous abuse!

They, marsupials, should reject the designation 'marsupial'.
Must start to self-identify as AoP, Animals of Pouch!

Only marsupials with a cervix have a pouch, comrade. Stop being a misandrist!

Marsupials? Looks like a rodent with pockets...

Hmmmph. rodents. (spit)

Kapitan Kangaroo Kourt wrote:Only marsupials with a cervix have a pouch, comrade. Stop being a misandrist!

Comrade there is nothing wrong with A LOT of MAN BASHING! It's for the Common Good™.



Please meet me behind The Peoples Vodka Dispensary on 888 Leningrad Way for reparations...




[EDIT: REPARATIONS WITHDRAWN! AHEM! (will be available to the NEXT worthy prole!)]

Comrade there is nothing wrong with A LOT of MAN BASHING! It's for the Common Good™.

Kangaroos are not men, comrade. To assume so shows your racist white supremacist tendencies. For the first time in my adult life, I'm really proud to be a kangaroo and you try to bring me down with your racist, speciesist, white supremacist rhetoric. You should denounce yourself!

[no... rather.. we will withdraw your reparations -RR]

Kapitan Kangaroo Kourt wrote:

Comrade there is nothing wrong with A LOT of MAN BASHING! It's for the Common Good™.

Kangaroos are not men, comrade. To assume so shows your racist white supremacist tendencies. For the first time in my adult life, I'm really proud to be a kangaroo and you try to bring me down with your racist, speciesist, white supremacist rhetoric. You should denounce yourself!

Androgynous Comrade comrade of ubiquitous Gender and status,

You said stop being MISANDRIST! That would be MAN BASHING. For which there is not enough of.

We will see you next week at the local Jiffi-Lobo for your usual appointment... or do you not recall our visits so far?

Training rodents is so difficult.

RR

Comrade, what matters is that I feel offended. You may try to mansplain it away but it's irrelevant. I feel offended and therefore you are wrong. This is a simple concept to comprehend.

["I" who is this "I" comrade??? There is no "I", there is only "WE" ...and now we withdraw your selfish offense with ANOTHER TRIP TO JIFFI LOBO! -RR]

Kapitan Kangaroo Kourt wrote:...

They, marsupials, should reject the designation 'marsupial'.
Must start to self-identify as AoP, Animals of Pouch!

Only marsupials with a cervix have a pouch, comrade. Stop being a misandrist!

Ja, admitted: vee haf a problem here.
Zou, let's make it AOP - Animals Originating from Pouch. Ja?


P.S. Any comrade who starts pouncing: O yes? And what came first, marsupial or the pouch? will instantly ― hoppity-hop, ja? ― land in Umiat, AK (Barrack #2, Nature consciousness unit)!

Komrade Kangaroo Kourt, kharasho to see you here after a longer break!
(Did Komrade Ivan hand over to you extra ration cards? For a nice gulp of precious beetily fluids?)

Comrade, I've just been released from the re-education resort due to the fears of the inmates guests contracting the Trump Flu™. I was supplied with rations enough for me to roam (cough, cough, hack, cough) the People's Republic of Oregon (cough) with instructions to spread cheer (cough, cough, hack, cooooughghgh) throughout (haaacheeew) the great Republic and extol the virtues (cough, cough, cough, haaacheeew) of re-education resorts. (sniff) It truly brings (cough, cough, cough) tears to my eyes.

Kapitan Kangaroo Kourt wrote:...

Genosse Dummkopf wrote:They, marsupials, should .. start to self-identify as AoP, Animals of Pouch!

Only marsupials with a cervix have a pouch, comrade. Stop being a misandrist!

Red Rooster wrote:

Kapitan Kangaroo Kourt wrote:

Red Rooster wrote:Comrade there is nothing wrong with A LOT of MAN BASHING! ...

Kangaroos are not men, comrade. To assume so shows your racist white supremacist tendencies. ...

... You said stop being MISANDRIST! That would be MAN BASHING. ...

To all komrades identifying as Anthropos (Άνθρωπος)! I'm increasingly feeling unsafe, microaggressed, and triggered. DO YOU TOO?

Here we have those two trans-speciesal kulaks, blithely freewheeling about.. OUR matters, Anthropocomrades! Frankly, should that endure, we will need to CHAZCHOP our territory or sumptin!

[Does Dummkopf need a trip to Jiffi Lobo along with Kaptain Kangaroo? Perhaps we should grab Peewees bicycle and make a trip for The Common Good? -RR]

---

Basically, that other-speciesed duo is unkorrektly korrekt:

Hoppity→Man: You trigger penile marsupials! Stop yor MISANDRY!
Kikeriki→Hoppity: MAN BASHING GOOD!
Hoppity→Kikeriki: Hoppity-Hops not MEN, you Cock-A-Doodle-Doo!
Kikeriki→Hoppity: But you wail "MISANDRY!" Hah!

Other opinions feelings?
Komradette RedD? _(it's hilariously discombobulating, ain't it?)

---

And I see the sequel coming, sigh:
Kikeriki→Dummkopf: It's "Cock-A-Doodle-Doo", not "Kikeriki", you dummkopf you!

["I" who is this "I" comrade??? There is no "I", there is only "WE" ...and now we withdraw your selfish offense with ANOTHER TRIP TO JIFFI LOBO! -RR]

Comrade, this is obviously just another attempt to oppress myself and my fellow marsupials and you should be ashamed. Obviously, when I speak of "I", I'm speaking for the entire marsupial constituency and all its sub-groups. As a Proletariat Master™, you ought to know this. You can't win Red. If you strike me down, we shall become more powerful than you can possibly imagine.

Komrade KKK, that portrayal of your Orange-CoV2-impregnated peregrination across Oregonistan is onomatopoeically sublime!

(especially loved the "haaacheeew" - exactly what Opa Ullmann (= my dear grampa) used to spout when he felt like sneezing!)

Genosse Dummkopf wrote: Other opinions feelings?
Komradette RedD? _(it's hilariously discombobulating, ain't it?)

Tsk. Felines are above such. According to our own feline lore, "When in doubt, wash." I lick my paw at all of this. (Until the Party otherwise directs, of course.)

Some cats are wiser than other cats... we see your disguise Kaptain Kangaroo!

Kaptain Kangaroo!

I understand that birds have difficulty seeing straight and your brains lack Real Active Memory capacity but that's not a good excuse for continually misspelling my rank. I groveled for this rank from the very first days of my membership in The Party™. I earned it! I licked more boots than......well, more boots than you can imagine. This might require some real active RAM corrective action.

Komrade Kaptain Little Gloves,

You have no credentials and everything you say is comparative with down under flatulence.

This started with EWE, Comrade Batshit Kagaroo Rodent, not understanding the difference between Misogyny and Misandry, and you took that moment to attack your superiors.

Which means there is one rodent to big in the drawls due to Vodka intake to understand the imperative workings of The Party™.

Yes, we are Equal™, yes, We Understand™ your Pain™ as Rodent with Boxing Gloves™. We are Equal™ comrade, but some are more Equal than others.

Commissar Rooster



Grovel for The Party™, or make your way into the Gulagosphere!

[color=#C0392B][b]RR[/b][/color] ([url=https://thepeoplescube.com/peoples-blog/marsupials-demand-removal-of-memorials-to-invasive-species-t21718.html#234731]here[/url]) wrote:[Does Dummkopf need a trip to Jiffi Lobo along with Kaptain Kangaroo? Perhaps we should grab Peewees bicycle and make a trip for The Common Good? -RR]

Ha-ha, I'm above that. Being a Dummkopf, I'm ex definitione lastingly Lobo-ed.

But spasiba for the funky Pee Wee Bike. (it's elektrik, ja? odzervise ze Party haf to park it vhere ze sun not shine - vee are kultured sustainably karbon-free pipel here, in al-Krautlandiyah.)

Ah, and zanks for zat sweet kompanion, Little Gloves.

I vill gladly take zir for a dekarbonous ride, in full kompliance vit our worldwidely praised and planet-leading Elektromobilitätskultur (Electromobility Culture). Clad in kontra-CoV-2 garb, of course (goggles, shield, full-body condom, alupickelhaube, and headgear pyramid on top).

I vill goggle out not to overbicycle any kikerikis.

Most agitated Comrades. We see you have allot to say about how special you are, so you can discuss that amongst yourself down here. Comrades of The Party™ are not so self absorbed.

We are pretty sure Comrade Mi, and others, gave you hint many beet cycles ago. Yet, it seems you are inept of taking hints from The Party™.

Enjoy Gulag!

Red Rooster wrote:Most agitated Comrades. ...

Komradely recommendation to take a peek into this PROG-OFF.