The People's Cube - Political Satire

Chairman! Comrades! Greetings from the Socialist State of Louisiana. First let me apologize for a little duplicity. There is no free OPM here though the potential is there, as always for the wise socialist. I only wished to revive an old Collective tradition of showing off one's Cube but was too lazy to find that threadwished to grab the Chairman's attention away from whatever nefarious deeds he is up to as I know what I have to show him will likely bring a warm tingle down his legs. But do go all the way Chairman, you will know what I mean when we get there.

Here comrades, we see the Cube outside the Home of the Fighting Bayou Bengal Tigers of LSU! The left hand corner shows part of the "cage" mentioned below.



Now the Cube is checking out the LSU Tiger's own Mike the Tiger's million dollar plus “cage.” Ah, if only our proles could live in such digs eh? BTW, this is the only animal cage one will find in the State of Louisiana that does not come equipped with a sign for a recipe.




Unfortunately, Mike the Tiger seemed less than impressed bythe Cube, he slept through the whole thing, no doubt sated by the People's foodand dreams of the glorious Tigers on the football field this coming year..



Now Chairman, we get to the part that I know will cause a tingle down your legs, your heart to beat rapidly, and for socialist sorrow to shed tears at the loss. Here, like a compass needle is drawn to the north(which raises the question, why is the north so competitive? Why are the other directions discriminated against?), the Chairman is drawn to OPM, the Cube was drawn to the home of the first and most famous socialist, Huey “Every Man's a King” Long!



Uh Chairman, for a Lenin's second I thought you were there! Then I realized that this feeling was caused by the sheer force of collective spirit that seemed to reach out from the very ground reaching into my back pocket for OPM! This man was a socialist before socialism was cool! If this doesn't inspire you, then you are either a necro voter or a imperialist war mongering Bush lover!



The Cube was now presented to the House that Huey built, and received due deference.



This comrades, is most sad. This is the site where Huey was gunned down by a mad dentist, a pawn in the hand of Bush operatives bent on preventing Huey from running for the White House against FDR who was but a featherweight socialist compared to Huey. It was alleged that this dentist with his little pistol actually killed Huey, not the hundreds of machine gun bullets fired by his bodyguards in a rather confined marble hallway. I would show the one picture of a bullet hole, but it sort of looks like the surface of Saturn.There used to be many when I was a kid, but those panels have been replaced, nodoubt to cover up the Bush conspiracy.



Finally, looking back at Huey and my hometown.



Here we have the Huey P Long governor's mansion, which DOES NOT BARE ANY RESEMBLANCE TO THE WHITE HOUSE!



Finally, I retired to a Collective Coffeehouse where I studied hard to figure out how to operate the Cube.



Voila! I have the answer! I beat the Cube in 2 ways! First,my cube is redder than other comrade's red! Yes it is! Secondly, there are 6 sides to the cube, But only one side does not have the People's Cube insignia.That side has the anagram RUBIK, This clearly stands for Revolutionary Understanding Begets Intelligence and Knowledge! See? I am more equal!



After all of this, the Cube needed some refreshing People's beverage.



It's been a long day, so now the Cube must rest on my very own spread, made especially for me, the Mighty Pup!



That is that comrades, I hope you enjoyed.

Marshal! The collective is glad to see you alive and well and looking more human than dog-like! The collective also couldn't help but notice the Laika shirt that perfectly color-coordinated with the Cube (not that the collective implies that all colors are not equal - except red, of course). The motorcycling pup's blankie is also a nice touch.

But the collective expected you to show pictures of the Cube inside Pup's Party Pleasure Palace, and it is disappointed not to find any. Also the personal parking place in front of Party headquarters with the sign "Reserved for Marshal Pupovich" as supporting evidence to beat all the parking tickets that are being forwarded to the Party Office of Accounting, Judgment, and Dispensation. The collective finds itself thoroughly agitated and demands that heads roll.

Whose heads is to be decided by drawing straws or by tossing the Cube.

As soon as I get my camera back from the thoughtcriminals who have not got it back to me, I must engage in a process of showing Olympia as cube friendly, if not more so.

I mourn the passing of Comrade Huey Long. Truly a noble socialist.

Red Square wrote: But the collective expected you to show pictures of the Cube inside Pup's Party Pleasure Palace, and it is disappointed not to find any. Also the personal parking place in front of Party headquarters with the sign "Reserved for Marshal Pupovich" as supporting evidence to beat all the parking tickets that are being forwarded to the Party Office of Accounting, Judgment, and Dispensation. The collective finds itself thoroughly agitated and demands that heads roll.

Comrade Red Square, I am so sorry I was unable to fulfill your wish before I was aware of it, and I am not sure if I can supply a picture of me and the Cube inside the Pup's Party Pleasure Palace, at least not till I examine them closely to make sure there is no, er, sensitive material showing. But I am pleased to finally settle this alleged parking spot "tempest in a vodka bottle." Here you see my parking spot, along with my security assistants and my power chair. It is necessary for me to have one close to the entrance and a power chair due to my disability, brought on in the service of the Party.

Comrade Colonel, we will be looking forward to your pictures of the Cube. I think it should be a requirement for Inner Circle members, to own their own cube (now that I have mine).

Mine arrived yesterday and I promptly became dizzy with success finding that each side is Red, no matter how I turn it. Oh glorious, simply glorious. I started drooling and even all of my Inner Comrades(TM) started drooling.

Ahh the Change(TM) I Hoped(TM) for has arrived!

Doesn't it just fill you with a sense of "more equal than?"

I felt so fantastically more than equal when I got mine that I had to show it off to every prole I passed at "work". They were dizzy with jealousy.

I find that the cube is quite the ice breaker with doubleplusgood sex comrades, that it almost makes me feel for those less equals that have no cube to show. Though I must admit, I am surprised we haven't been propositioned by a certain comrade with a golden shovel.

Dizzy with success

Once I catch up on certain bills I'm gonna order a Che <3 shirt too. Can't decide which one though. Killing for the common good is a kneejerk one as I came up with the line, but there are so many good ones. Mebbe I should just order one a week until I have them all. Mmmm Chepokemon anyone? Collect them all!

Would you believe, I can't say I have ever seen Che's image down here in my collective. Not sure how many would know who it was. We have much work to be done Comrade!