5/7/2023, 7:43 pm
Submitted by an equal comrade, to the tune of Supercalifragilisticexpialidocious.
Oh . . .
Woe is you—a citizen of the sad Russian nation!
You’ve got rulers who commit
moral abomination.
When Vlad’s mad, he may decree
your sudden termination:
Suicide or poisoning or else defenestration!
Um diddle diddle diddle um diddle ay
Um diddle diddle diddle um diddle die!
You’ve all heard of the KGB
of inauspicious fame.
It’s been re-branded: FSB
is now its happy name.
But if it sets its sights on you
the outcome’s just the same:
You’re bound to kick the bucket in
this deadly power game
Of
Suicide or poisoning or else defenestration!
Just the very thought of these
might cause you consternation.
When Vlad’s mad, he may decree
your sudden termination:
Suicide or poisoning or else defenestration!
Um diddle diddle diddle um diddle ay
Um diddle diddle diddle um diddle die!
He sends his thugs throughout the world
to kill those he resents
there’s poisoning on English streets;
there’s Spanish apartments.
In Russian winters people seem
to open windows wide
then lose their footing and begin
a sudden downward ride!
Yikes!
Suicide or poisoning or else defenestration!
Quite a menu to choose from
for your elimination.
When Vlad’s mad, he may decree
your sudden termination:
Suicide or poisoning or else defenestration!
Um diddle diddle diddle um diddle ay
Um diddle diddle diddle um diddle die!
So if you have the misfortune
to live in Russkiy mir,
you’d better keep your mouth shut
or you’ll live in gripping fear.
But that won’t last long. Rest assured
you soon won’t feel this dread:
the kindly Putin will end it
by making sure you’re dead . . .
. . . by:
Suicide or poisoning or else defenestration
or other methods best left to
Putin’s imagination.
When Vlad’s mad, he may decree
your sudden termination:
Suicide or poisoning or else defenestration!