The People's Cube - Political Satire

Inspired by Cindy Sheehan, the mother of a slain soldier who is camping outside President Bush's ranch until she gets a face-to-face explanation of why he killed her son, other mothers begin to demand apologies for their grievances as well.

In Wipeit NE, mom Ella Cinder has pitched a tent outside a local Dairy Queen, demanding a meeting with its CEO so he can explain his culpability for her 32-year old son Chucky slipping on a partially-eaten Chili Lime Chicken Strip Basket at the State Fair.

When asked how Dairy Queen could be responsible for her son's injury, foam appeared at the corners of her mouth, and an enraged Ms. Cinder screamed, "I demand an answer! Minimum one hour and on camera, with my advisor and lawyer present. My Chucky was in the fairgrounds walking to the cattle shed -- and just like that, he took a spill. So I am not going away until the CEO flies in from his fancy office, and personally apologizes for their entire corporate mentality of not caring. DQ knew!"

Also in response, a nearby crowd started chanting, "DQ - Shame on you! DQ - Shame on you!" and they held up signs saying, "Shut down Dairy Queen!"

She is receiving support from activists around the globe. One such group in Germany has stated, "We don't even know what Dairy Queen is, but now we hate it. If a concerned mother is protesting something, we must listen. Mothers have wisdom that cannot be ignored."

Local groups feel the same way. One spokesperson for STOP DQ! has confided, "We've hated Dairy Queen for a long time, but now they've gone too far with their Chili Lime Chicken Strip Baskets. This latest tragedy has given us a chance to draw our attention to Dairy Queen's despicable practices. The way we look at it, a self-righteous mother who trades on her son's misfortune has a lock on the moral high ground -- and is therefore immune to criticism. How can anyone not sympathize with the caring mom who fights the big bad CEO? And in the process, she gains celebrity and brings publicity to our cause to stop Dairy Queen. Sort of like Michael Moore getting his start by harassing Roger Smith in 'Roger and Me' only she's even more bitter. And she's a mom!"

This incident has also attracted the attention of prominent politicians. Senator Kennedy (D-MA) exclaimed, "Speaking as an ice-cream enthusiast and as an alcoholic who took a few spills myself, I'll be either upset or gratified by this, depending on what my advisors tell me to say. As soon as I learn where Nebraska is, I'll be on the first flight out."

Senator Clinton ( D-NY, AR, IL, etc.) is similarly concerned. When contacted at her Presidential Exploration Committee Office, she shrieked, "I'm enraged by this. Dairy Queen owes an explanation to every mom in the world, and we're going to arrest its CEO for failure to prevent this. Dairy Queen lied, and Chucky died!"

Chucky, who is in stable condition at a local hospital, declined to comment.

I heard Karl Rove ate at a Dairy Queen once...

The People will not stand for this!

I don't care how many human beings,
Dairy Queen has liberated,
with their Tasty Capitalist Edibles.

If it is not common, or average, it is poison for our masses...

Where'd my icecream go duude!?

How about some support for all the people killed on heroin and the President George W. Bush who sees that tons of it is brought into American to quiet the masses! Absurd stroy!

Heartfelt sympathies go out to this mother from the Dogood camp. Instead saying "I can't imagine her grief and horror" I am actually going to sit down, and imagine her grief. Surely that will get me all worked up enough to forgo my monthly Dilly Bar. I do what I can. I am on a fixed income you know. Perhaps I can send my savings on my DQ boycott, to someones progressive campaign in her name. I don't know what else I can do to further the lefts cause. I am on a fixed income you know. I am looking for a suitor to help out with the bills, then I will be able to send more money to grieving leftist mothers who get face time on leftist TV.
Ta-ta dearies.

Silence D.

No ice cream for oil!
NO ICE CREAM FOR OIIIIIL!!!

All ice-cream lovers!!! Report yourselves (your parents, siblings, neighbors, etc.) to the nearest ADP station immediately and submit to re-education training. If you are not there within 2 hours - you will be rounded up and sent to a gulag selected from Amnesty International's top 10 best State run Camps list.

Oh you're making me hungry!

Perhaps we should all send a Dairy Queen gift certificate to Comrade Sheehan to show our support.

As for me, I plan to go out and grill some red meat from cows that are polluting the planet with their methane emissions.

Just doing my part.

Down with the reactionary Diary Queen!
Up with the agrarian Tastee Freeze!

I demand an audience with Tom Carvel. Someone side-swiped my car in the parking lot of one of his stores. And DON'T TELL ME HE IS DEAD. I know he is alive and fornicating with a Cookiepuss made of human organs!

Found on Free Republic
https://www.freerepublic.com/focus/f-news/1464011/posts

Comrade Square:
Dispatch the Copyright-Infringement Police at once!!
Up against a wall with these intellectual-property-freepie-thieves-immediately!

I sincerely hope that Ms. Sheehan is sipping something other than the vintages produced by what are so humorously described as "Texas vineyards".

It's bad enough that she must endure ticks the size of a Russian Blue, and that the rattlesnakes all possess the vindictive personality of Karl Rove, but to pass that swill over a reasonably-trained palette is abominable.

Perhaps you could arrange for M. Palimpsest to ship a case of his Marxist-approved wine to Crawford for the benefit of this heroine?

P.S. You may also wish to alert the MSM to the contribution of M. Palimpsest. It would not only be a good PR move, but would inexorably link the cause of French Marxism to the plight of Ms. Sheehan. A “win-win” for all of us in the Movement!

I've never been to Dairy Queen....

Sheehan is a national disgrace. Maybe more so than Teddy Kennedy, Michael Moore, Schumer, Boxer and the other liberal nuts from the radical left trying to take down America.

Save Us From Liberals wrote:Sheehan is a national disgrace. Maybe more so than Teddy Kennedy, Michael Moore, Schumer, Boxer and the other liberal nuts from the radical left trying to take down America.

I DENOUNCE YOU!!! HOW CAN YOU THINK SUCH THOUGHTS!!? No one has done more to advance the People's collective than Teddy, Chucky, "Babs Boxer", and Comrade Moore!! Cindy Sheman is a piker compared to these wise members of the Politburo (although her star is rising).

To the re-education center with you!!

Private Pravda wrote:

Save Us From Liberals wrote:Sheehan is a national disgrace. Maybe more so than Teddy Kennedy, Michael Moore, Schumer, Boxer and the other liberal nuts from the radical left trying to take down America.

I DENOUNCE YOU!!! HOW CAN YOU THINK SUCH THOUGHTS!!? No one has done more to advance the People's collective than Teddy, Chucky, "Babs Boxer", and Comrade Moore!! Cindy Sheman is a piker compared to these wise members of the Politburo (although her star is rising).

To the re-education center with you!!

i hate dairy queen especially the one in independance mo they always mess up your order or have a real nasty attitude especially the owner and i don't think they know it but when the employees talk talk trash on there customers WE CAN HEAR THEM and they need to stop being disrespectful to people if they wanna stay in business
thank you

DQ must be stopped!

Lenin would have wanted it this way!

Another Haliberton plot, they eat at DQ and caused this. When are they going to be held responsible for creating the hurricane that destroyed those poor black folks homes in New Orleans.

Starbucks finances a few libertarian efforts in the mideast that is involved in the war between Lebonon. (Excuse my spelling) McDonalds has been known to not pay wages to working students, and Wal-mart doesn't promote equality for woman, in fact, they discourage it. Why is it that a lime peel, which could happen in someones house hold, injures someone and you blame DQ? Maybe he should have been looking where he was going? And maybe that mother should stop blaming everyone else for simple mistakes.

TheSecretKeeper - I'd tell you the answer but I'm not sure you can keep it secret.

I'll answer Comrade Secret Keepers questions, Comrade Red Square. It is my duty and mission to ensure ideological purity within the ranks at any cost necessary (cost to the taxpayer, of course).

Why is it that a lime peel, which could happen in someones house hold, injures someone and you blame DQ?

Yes we blame DQ, Comrade. DQ is a corporation which is sucking the life-blood out of the oppressed all over the world. They are evil people, Comrade. They are selling tasty treats that are making children fat and are throwing down lime peels to oppress women and minorities. Oh, and did I mention they have a ton of money? Yes... we like money. Money, money, money... give to me.

Maybe he should have been looking where he was going?

What kind of monster are you? Look where he is going!?

No... DQ should look where he is going and THEY CLEARLY FAILED! If anything this mother should be awared at least -- at least! -- $200 million dollars! Her lawyers should be awarded $300 million dollars and the government should move to regulate DQ and unionize every one there right down to the kid who locks the door up a night. LIVING WAGES, NOW!

And maybe that mother should stop blaming everyone else for simple mistakes.

Your ignorance is beyond my grasp, Comrade. You truly make me sick. We are a international pariah due to such words like that, Comrade. We are laughed at because people like you -- yes, YOU! -- seem to think that personal responsibility is some sort of virtue. Ugh... I am absolutely disgusted now! I hope President Obama deals with people like you.

This is far worse than the finger found in the chili at a Wendy's. The fast food industry must be destroyed comrades! Make way for Party run food on the go!