Commemorate the outgoing year of 2008 with these nostalgic progressive haikus. Feel the paradigm shift as the clock strikes 12 and we move from the Year of Bush to the Year of Obama!
(Just as progressive poets have liberated the verse from the oppression of rhyme, we have liberated our haikus from the archaic 5-7-5 syllable restriction, which was a purely bourgeois formality. Who needs to count? Report them to the nearest ACLU officer!)
Unwashed masses!
The only thing not smelly
is the money you give us.
For love and for hate
We take away from the rich
and give to the hookers.
We must change the country
with a focus on nature -
oh, look, a squirrel!
Every Rorschach inkblot
looks like George Bush with horns.
Psychiatric evaluations are torture!
I'm opening at random
a copy of the New York Times.
The income gap is deepening.
This morning I brushed
granola flakes from my beard.
25 days left until Bush leaves office!
Together we can build
a new habitat for humanity
with our hammers and sickles.
A giant SUV:
one gallon, two gallon, three gallons.
Why is Bush still in power?
Without marijuana leaf
How can we struggle
for social justice?
I was drinking my latte
While reading the New York Times.
Will I survive this winter?
The Soviet Union is dead
and yet - isn't there still something
remaining in us?
The bumper sticker before me
says that our planet is doomed.
The guilt is unbearable.
You raise awareness,
and I raise awareness. Utopia
is around the corner.
Imams praying on the plane -
ask them, which public building
will be blown up next.
Flies drop dead as I write.
How many civil liberties
will also be dead today?
Having refused fossil fuels
how lonely I feel
in the cold of night!
A lovely thing to see:
on my computer screen,
real women.
A lonely comment posted
on my very progressive blog -
with a link to Viagra.
Bush lied today.
Tomorrow poor children
Will be all dead.
After flying on a private jet
I bought carbon credits
And feel smug again
You made a profit
and now you must share.
The community is watching.
Work makes me desperate.
I will vote many times
for Barack the Avenger.
Post your progressive haikus here!
12/25/2008, 7:50 pm
Colonel 7.62
Here is my redundantly posted haiku shared again in hopes of advancing the glorious progressive cause!
Obama Savior
Will redistribute the wealth
Bring equality
The rich will suffer
The poor will dance in the street
Hail our new leader
Socialism saves
Capitalism oppress
Await hope and change
12/25/2008, 8:21 pm
DDR Kamerad
Government Helps You!
Nationalized Health, Commerce
Shades of Anschaltung
First black president
Is not an oreo; his
middle is quite red
12/25/2008, 10:39 pm
Superkommissar Maksim
Worst President ever
now that the Bushitler's crimes
total three fourteen
12/25/2008, 11:11 pm
Ivan From Village 62
Hail Comrade Barack!
Hope and change for all comrades
cockroaches for lunch.
12/25/2008, 11:49 pm
Great Stalin's Ghost
Stop climate change,
Give your spare change,
For the children.
Save the planet.
No oil or coal.
Learn to photosynthesize.
First there is Hussein,
Then there's no Hussein,
Then there is.
There is no freedom.
There is only,
Obama.
Even poetry,
Can be progressive,
If the party approves.
12/26/2008, 12:02 am
Cradle to Grave Marxist
It is Bush's fault
I hate Bu$Hitler
Who will we blame next year
It will be Bush's fault.
It is Bush's fault that I went over the plan's budget for Haiku lines.
C2G
12/26/2008, 12:05 am
Union Boss
Thanks for this opportunity to allow us to express our artistic side Red Square. With Obama at the helm, I expect to recieve a boatload of cash through art endowments!!
Union Boss has quit
No longer needs to work hard
Barry will provide.
Gas Prices Falling
Good time to raise gas taxes
Income for wind farms
Birds, bees, and green trees
Nature is awe inspiring
Bush nearly killed it
Who is this Blago?
Sounds crazy to me. Keep clear.
Must remain clean.
A cat, a big rat
Natural enemies or
Future human food?
Palin out of news
I miss her hefty titties
Run again Sarah
Socilism. Yes!
It's about damn time people
Unlce Sam now rules
Black American
Is President elect now
Next is Chinese gal
Al Queda not worse
Then the Bush family bunch
They are now our friends
Dems control all now
Makes me tingle and fertile
I shall spread my seed.
Unemployment rules!
I sit and you pay my bills
You lose. I win. Ha!
Taxes for the rich
They steal from me routinely
Obama gives back.
Trucks in high demand
Small cars cannot haul lumber
Mandates, ooops, wrong move
Barry elected
I am still miserable
Why the hell is that?
Pro Choice is the way
Babies mean less food for our
Elected elites.
Haiku's are great fun
Rhyming not necessary
Five, Seven, Five, Done!
Whales, three toed sloths, Bees
Endangered! Need your money
Yes, it is a scam.
Minnesota's Cold
Where is our warming Al Gore?
We need heat, Fraudster!
Consider the religion of peace--it'll blow you away
Had enough? Vote Lenin!
The Globe is getting warmer--except when it isn't
12/26/2008, 2:17 am
Innostranyi Otdel
If you speak dissent,
in the night you will slumber,
wake as "Number 6"!
Communism's Flaw:
The scent of a Commune is
damn dirty hippies...
"Islam is peaceful,
Jihad is a state of mind"
Mohammed made wars
MohammedMuhammidMohamoud Allah's schill confused,
many ways to spell his name.
Jesus is easier...
12/26/2008, 2:57 am
Proletarian Robot
Bush finally done.
Obama became anointed.
Barack please pay up.
Biden is very dumb.
Aneurysms decreased your IQ.
Obama please don't die.
Barney Frank is gay.
Can believe he used "Fannie".
All our asses hurt.
12/26/2008, 4:07 am
DDR Kamerad
Who was this Palin?
Hot distraction from cold north
Mission Accomplished!
Che film out, Sozis
Control White House; have yourself
a merry Kwanzaa
I wonder how a
State-Sponsored brew would taste like...
Tastes great, less filling?
12/26/2008, 6:14 am
Commissar Obamissar V
Commissar Maksim wrote:Worst President ever
now that the Bushitler's crimes
total three fourteen
Comrade Commissar-
<br>An equally Progressive site puts the number of crimes against the People at 525.
12/26/2008, 8:50 am
Che Gourmet
This is new for me
Hope I don't blow it
How my head is hurtin'
"2008 nearly over"
So many victories!
Change is here!
Dear Leader Red
Is Haiku mandatory?
Feels like school
To financial sector
Where are the $$
People are hurtin'
This is not so hard
Really kind of fun
Not like real work
Che' film is out now
better be truthful or,
The evil pigs will pay!
To Proletarian Robot
Speak for yourself MY ass doesn't hurt! LOL! Hey! That really was fun! Gracias, Red!
12/26/2008, 12:05 pm
The Skinnee Jay
"Nostalig Progressive"? Wait, does it mean The Past is Progress? I'm confused. Must be Bush's fault.
12/26/2008, 12:57 pm
Komrade Karin
"Lone Comment" Haiku
and "Barney Frank Fannie" post
Made me Laugh Out Loud.
Prog Blogs dull as hell
Fail to gain witticisms.
No one LOL.
I am new to Cube.
It looks like tremendous fun.
Can't laugh loud at work.
12/26/2008, 1:13 pm
Superkommissar Maksim
Breast not Bombs women
Chase me every night in dreams
I wake vomiting
12/26/2008, 1:19 pm
Red Square
The Skinnee Jay wrote:"Nostalig Progressive"? Wait, does it mean The Past is Progress? I'm confused. Must be Bush's fault.
Wasn't the entire progressive movement, historically speaking, a nostalgic reaction to industrialization and capitalism? Behind the progressive idea of a powerful benevolent state taking care of the little people is the old myth of a benevolent overlord caring for his subjects without such silly distractions like the individual rights to life, liberty, and the pursuit of happiness.
What motivated and united the spiritually-minded progressives was their confused, irrational revulsion of the perceived materialism of the markets, which they attacked much like Don Quixote attacked the windmills thinking they were the dragons. The elitist progressives resented the markets, competition, and growing productivity of labor that took the power away from the deserving aristocratic elites and gave it to the undeserving lowly business people - only because they produced our food, clothes, houses, tools, medicine, increased life expectancy, reduced the share of stupefying hard manual labor through innovation, and increased the share of clean, professional, high-paying jobs, which even further reduced the dependency of the individual commoner on the caring elites. The ingrates! That led to the rise of Don Quixote - the archetypal early progressive fighter against the materialistic bourgeoisie.
Any progressive would be proud of a comparison with the idealistic Don Quixote. But it's not the idealism that makes it wrong - it's the direction in which this idealism is going.
The road to renewed spirituality and communal living is clear: punish the achievers, tax the productive, expropriate the capitalist property, reduce labor productivity, shorten life expectancy lest the Social Security program bankrupts the nation, decrease the share of clean, professional, high-paying jobs, and increase the share of stupefying hard manual labor - which is what Obama's shovel-ready infrastructure projects are about. Give up your computer and grab a shovel - the future looks bright!
Only a thoroughly delusional moonbat or a crooked demagogue would call such regress a "progress." But that's what this absurdity is called - "progress." Obama talks about taking the country to the 21st century. That is an insult to everyone who worked hard to take it there. Where Obama is objectively taking the country, though, is back to the beginning of the 20th century at best. It might as well be 1605 when Don Quixote was written.
In the unlikely event you're interested in whatever else I have written on Don Quixote, click here: Don Quixote: The Ultimate Moonbat
12/26/2008, 1:36 pm
Che Gourmet
Hey Red Square,
Did you know I named my horse, Rocinante after Don Quixote's horse? There is a blog called Quixote's Horse that stands up for all we believe in (that is, really believe in) here at the Cube:
"Every man has something of Don Quixote in his Humour, some darling Dulcinea of his Thoughts, that sets him very often upon mad Adventures. What Quixotes does not every Age produce in Politics and Religion, who fancying themselves to be in the right of something, which all the world tells 'em is wrong...?" - Motteaux Rocinante... that was the name of Don Quixote's skinny old horse.
QUIXOTE'S HORSE is dedicated to tirelessly exposing the lies and hypocrisy of governments, corporations and individuals wherever we may find them.
If I really had a horse, (and I did at one time) I would name him Rocinante!
12/26/2008, 1:52 pm
JoeB31
Kiss Me...
I just gave birth to a Progressive...
12/26/2008, 2:10 pm
sonoffar
The blade whispers as I draw it across my throat.
The crimson hammer and sickle bloom on my shirt.
I am free to worship The Collective, The One.
The One, my Lord
We exchange our coats
Yours fine and warm, mine non-existent.
My Lord has come with the January snow.
Toes and fingers turned black
The snows of January piled high.
The One has come.
All will be well.
My brothers and sisters we come in joy.
Give of your abundance.
We come in peace.
We will receive our share.
We follow The One.
The warm blood flows over the street.
Haiku you, who will not serve The Collective, and honor The One.
12/26/2008, 2:25 pm
Opiate of the People
Once bought a McMasion
On 5K annual salary as haiku maker
What a fool I was!
Me pooping in pants
But wait, October crisis, Barney and Barack
Said 'twas Bush's fault!
Barack the Savior
Will help me with mortgage and gas
Pants now clean!
But since he won election
Barack saying not to hold breath re mortgage
Stomach getting queasy again!
Nah, can't be true
Barack on Time cover, has halo!
Won't let me down.
Barack is new FDR
Spending trillions on useless boondogles
The Progressive Way!
Still must wonder....
He came from land of many crooks
Et tu, Blagojevich?
No! Says Media:
Barack is the new Messiah!
They're OBJECTIVE!
I am a haiku maker
In another era, would be called "idiot"
Now I am majority...
your entire savings
delicate morning blossoms
wither with Summers.
Hope Change and Believe
This Fall these were directives
Motivate the dead
In winter it's cold!
No amount of farting alters
the ozone enough
12/26/2008, 3:17 pm
ob1zenobi
The Great One proclaims
" That's not the Blago I knew!"
All Hail the Ministry of Truth!
12/26/2008, 3:23 pm
Proletarian Robot
Obama really won? Billary now back in charge
Barack's days are few
Obama health care plan
Socialized medicine for all
Sick and old will die.
Biden cannot think
Brain surgeries did take their toll MediaTM covers your gaffes.
12/26/2008, 4:57 pm
Commissarka Pinkie
Obama works out
Wow! He doesn't even sweat!
Sexy pects, what a man!
Snow and ice all over
So what if we freeze, think about
Homeless polar bears!
Bush will soon be gone
Less than a month still remains
Impeach! Evict! Now!
Hope and Change are here
So why must I still pay for
My mortgage and gas?
I have no job, so
To buy Barack collectibles
I get food from pantry.
12/26/2008, 5:42 pm
Proletarian Robot
Obama guard thy nuts
Hill and Jess after them both
They are already gone?!
Obama's public works
Pick and shovel are my pals
The wealth been spread around?
12/26/2008, 6:01 pm
The Skinnee Jay
Red Square wrote:
The Skinnee Jay wrote:"Nostalig Progressive"? Wait, does it mean The Past is Progress? I'm confused. Must be Bush's fault.
Wasn't the entire progressive movement, historically speaking, a nostalgic reaction to industrialization and capitalism? Behind the progressive idea of a powerful benevolent state taking care of the little people is the old myth of a benevolent overlord caring for his subjects without such silly distractions like the individual rights to life, liberty, and the pursuit of happiness.
...
Does it mean we should go back to living in a cave? Hey, Osama lives in a cave, no? I heard he's progressive.
12/27/2008, 12:36 am
Colonel 7.62
No, living in a cave is bourgeois as there are not enough caves for everyone. Sleeping out state provided tents with equal bedding is the socialist way of ensuring equality.
Barack Obama and Joe Biden have a plan
Immediate Action to Create Good Jobs in America
Immediate Relief for Struggling Families
A Rapid, Aggressive Response to Our Financial Crisis
Using All the Tools We Have
And makin' thugs out you suckas.
From the cradle to the grave.
12/27/2008, 6:45 am
Commissar Obamissar V
Comrade C2G,
Sup Holmes!? Keepin' yo pimp hand strong? Did you get the 40 of O-E I sent you for Changemas?
I started a new thread in the Gulag for Trolls about Change.gov and my efforts to rattle some tinfoil contribute to their glorious page. What's funny is that most of the supporters of The One are not fully devoted. I see many future shovel-wielders for my Gulags! They dare to mention things like God and they question The One. They doubt the Change. Their Thumb-up/Thumb-down system gives Power to the People in reporting their peers! They contradict each other and seem to have trouble identifying the proper party line. Our Obamissar of Current Truth must ensure these rouge elements are brought in line...
Perhaps a few well timed drivebys might help to affect Change.
12/27/2008, 6:45 am
Komrade Karin
Maxim,
Your link made me sick
TG has much work to do
Left girls are ugly.
Much like NoHa Mass.
visited once for business.
Girl with beard and breasts.
Your dreams are now mine
Ashamed to be a woman.
We're not all like that.
12/27/2008, 10:43 am
Natasha sans Boris
Dahlinks! I have haikus but I follow bourgeois form of 5-7-5 syllables. Off to the gulags with me!
Polar bears will die.
Global warming the culprit.
Give money now, b!itch!
Progressive ideal?
Keep the masses ignorant
with publik schooling!
Obamessiah,
Our great leader and savior ...
Hey! Where's my wallet?
Call us democrats,
liberals or progressives,
we're still Red at heart!
Get rid of the rich!
They are greedy, selfish slime!
Hey! Where's my paycheck?
12/27/2008, 5:08 pm
DDR Kamerad
Hmmm, public schooling:
the ideological
puppy farm--hooray!
12/27/2008, 6:21 pm
Zampolit Blokhayev
Outlaw Home Schooling.
It Makes Counter-Revolutionaries.
Do It. Today.
12/28/2008, 1:46 am
Cradle to Grave Marxist
Obamissar Vodkavich wrote:Comrade C2G,
Sup Holmes!? Keepin' yo pimp hand strong? Did you get the 40 of O-E I sent you for Changemas?
I started a new thread in the Gulag for Trolls about Change.gov and my efforts to rattle some tinfoil contribute to their glorious page. What's funny is that most of the supporters of The One are not fully devoted. I see many future shovel-wielders for my Gulags! They dare to mention things like God and they question The One. They doubt the Change. Their Thumb-up/Thumb-down system gives Power to the People in reporting their peers! They contradict each other and seem to have trouble identifying the proper party line. Our Obamissar of Current Truth must ensure these rouge elements are brought in line...
Perhaps a few well timed drivebys might help to affect Change.
Good work Comrade. I understand that the Dot-Gov site is altering/deleting controversial/unwanted posts. They had a "disclaimer" that their feed-back blog-response section was run by a non-governmental entity--sorta "I wasn't Me" defense of why is da gubment deletin records.
Thanks fo da 40, we be rollin' phat an' livin' large.
C2G
12/28/2008, 2:10 am
Cradle to Grave Marxist
Yo G! Comrade357,
I love yo' avatar. Dat reminds me o' uh ho ah' once held tight. Man! She had da damn Ту́ла arms facto'y logo tattooed on ha' booty. Man! She wuzn't Finn sistah, but wuz absolutely rewo'ked. She sho' man wuz sweet t'me, if ya' catch muh ma fuckin JIBE. But ah' had t'let ha' jet, so's I could be some player. Ah be baaad...
DON'T CHANGE YOUR AVATAR, OR WE BE DRIVE-BY YO' ASS! Ya' dig?
(I love your avatar. It reminds me of a Mosin I once held tight. She had the Ту́ла arms factory logo engraved on her receiver. She wasn't Finned, but was reworked as a '59 . She sure was sweet. But I had to let her go; I was broke. Please feel free to keep that as your avatar.)
Da Peeps' Rapper
Comrade C2G хулиганье
And makin' thugs out you suckas.
From the cradle to the grave.
12/28/2008, 2:25 am
Colonel 7.62
Yo Comrade Cradle! Glad you like and understand my avatar. I do have one of those reworked Finn M39's. But I'm selling it tomorrow as I can't stand the sights. (Yes I know, I've committed blasphemy in the eyes of the collective) Nice rifle, but if I can't make out the sights well enough to hit the target.... I still have a Model 91/30 Mosin Nagant, a very sweet Tula SKS, and am building an AK from a Romanian parts kit.
I have a friend with two model 59 Mosins, both from the Izmash arsenal, like my 91/30. I may buy one from him. If you've got $129 or so, classicarms.us still has M91/59's available. I think I like the Mosin Nagant over any other bolt action rifle. I used to be a mauser snob until I discovered the world of Mosins. I should have registered as Comrade762 but I wasn't thinking, and was cleaning my revolver at the time... Oh well.
Comrade Leader Red Cube, is it possible to change my Revolutionary name to Comrade762, in order to better reflect the glorious rifles I hold so dear?
12/28/2008, 4:21 am
Innostranyi Otdel
The New Year cometh,
twenty days later we'll watch
The One take command.
Capitolism.
Fair Days Wage for Fair Days Work.
Sounds evil to me.
Change is relative.
As do the leaves in Autumn,
So too shall He fall...
The Mosin Nagant,
a venerated rifle,
that brought low the doomed.
Fat F**k Barney Frank.
Rest assured, while we all starve,
he won't miss a meal.
Nancy Pelosi.
Ultra late term abortions
forced upon the Right.
Latest Kennedy
to receive Entitlement.
New York wants one too.
I admit defeat,
but I am not finished yet.
I shall have revenge...
12/28/2008, 7:45 am
Comrade_Tovarich
Commissar Maksim wrote:Breast not Bombs women
Chase me every night in dreams
I wake vomiting
Comrade Commissar Maksim,
I thought such dreams were only for those in the 9th canto of Hell. Yet since you are still alive, probably, this might mean you are going through purge-atory now.
Some haiku for comrades:
Honkie boy or girl:
Uncool capitalist parents?
Che Guevara saves!
Yakutsk camp one-three
Cattle-cars of zeks, unseen
By scared eyes. Who's next?
Old childhood voice calls,
"Traitor quota, your town, soon."
Go camping for days.
Krugman says, "New Deal!"
New laws, taxes, depression.
Stalin, Hitler smile.
Ho ho Ho Chi Minh,
Dems cut funds, prison camps begin.
Call a loss a win.
Moonlit tundra, bright
Not a man, a flea-bitten wight
One shot, no echo.
The jiziya is
Redistribution, comrades:
Submit to Islam.
Bush and Cheney both
Made Republicanistan
In Iraq for oil.
My Whole Foods budget
Now goes to Wal*Mart, damn it!
Real libs feel my pain.
I'm a "secret shopper"
Not one catching shoplifters
Swipe my card, Wal*Mart.
Old Madoff made off
With millions I earned with my
Ivy League degree.
Ivy League degree
Took me to Wall Street then back down
Squeegee, no taxes.
Ninehundredthousand,
Hot cash, cold fridge, people's man.
Future prisoner?
12/28/2008, 1:20 pm
The Skinnee Jay
Fuck Bush
Bush is evil
Bush is behind 9/11
12/28/2008, 8:20 pm
DDR Kamerad
The only one that
You'll never hear cry "F*ck Bush"
Would be Barney Frank
12/28/2008, 11:38 pm
Proletarian Robot
Comrade_Tovarich
Ninehundredthousand,
Hot cash, cold fridge, people's man.
Future prisoner?
Comrade_Tovarich
You and the Innostranyi Otdel write haikus that could compete with the bard himself. Please do not misunderstand me, I do not refer to The Bard which is the omniscient Obamamessiah himself (may he reign forever) but sadly the bard which of course is just Shakespeare.
Please bear with and forgive this woefully ignorant Prole but what is the above quoted Haiku in reference to? If you feel that I need to know……
12/29/2008, 1:05 am
Worker65810
I am lamenting the fact that my selfish needs are outweighing the greater good of the people and I must work on the most glorious and long awaited anointing of our new Leader. Here are my thoughts. This has been helpful in my suffering.
WHY? must we work on
the most important day of
our sad life? Blame Bush.
While the fortunate
ones free of the burden
of work enjoy a parade?
Oh! To be there to
experience the joy! Joy!
Hail the Messiah!!
Fair and Balanced will
be my only eye that day.
Sean will be there. Woot.
Woe to the oppressed
and selfish ones not willing
to call in sick...or gay.
The glorious balls!
The champagne and ladies ball gowns!
My Dockers are cotton.
I chill with the thought
of failure and pull my coat close.
My mortgage is due.
I will gather my tools
for HE will free me from work.
When does free gas start?
12/29/2008, 1:58 am
Innostranyi Otdel
To my Soulless Comrade of the People, Proletarian Robot,
The above mentioned Haiku refers to the Greedy Swine Rep. William J. Jefferson (D-La.), who was caught with no small amount of filthy bribe money in his freezer.
To add further grime to this story of heinous misdeed, he was defeated in this recent
(s)election by Anh "Joseph" Cao, an escaped refugee from Saigon before the Glorious Reclamation.
Cao is a self-admitted Capitolist and a Republican Conservative Anti-intellectualist.
Sasha the Gulag Dancing Bear will enjoy administering his Re-education...
12/29/2008, 5:44 am
Comrade_Tovarich
Comrades,
Thank you for your acknowledgement of my selfless production. Placing me atop the ashcan of poetic history beneath which the bard lies is an honour this prole's shoulders can barely bear (ah, I could not help myself to the pun aided by the above graphic of our Sasha).
Which brings me to Comrade Innostanyi Otdel, to whom I express thanks for clarifying the details on the esteemed former Congressperson from Louisiana.
To Cao, I say, "Ciao anh!"
12/29/2008, 6:30 am
Innostranyi Otdel
"My existence is justified only by my service to others" ~ Anonymous Sycophant
Israel attacked
by Hamas and Hezbollah.
It is in the wrong?
Acts of cruelty,
violent bursts of rage and hate,
The Gray Lady sinks.
The One shows anger.
Omnipresent Media,
weighs heavily, yes?
Thrower of footwear,
having been to your country,
I know those ain't cheap.
Billions planned for roads,
energy, and eco-guilt.
Meanwhile a child starves.
12/29/2008, 2:13 pm
Proletarian Robot
Bravo! Brava! Bravi! (stated as such to avoid any potential gender confusion)
Innostrandyi Otdel, Comrade_Tovarich, and Others.....
Truly, your uncanny ability to weave Haikus is reminiscent of the hypnotic and persuasive speeches of Hitler Obama himself.
Your wisdom reflected in these writings seems to me as if you have been suckling at the teat of The One for your source of inspiration.
My question would be: is there room at The Teat for the rest of us?
12/29/2008, 4:15 pm
The Skinnee Jay
I don't get it. Is Bush still evil?
12/30/2008, 9:17 pm
Red Square
Comrade357 wrote:Comrade Leader Red Cube, is it possible to change my Revolutionary name to Comrade762, in order to better reflect the glorious rifles I hold so dear?
Go to your profile (in Grouptink) and change your name, password, avatar, or anything else you deem necessary to advance the class struggle. You can even use spaces and any other superfluous bourgeois niceties.
After the revolution, of course, all non-standard characters shall be eliminated and spaces replaced by underscores. Everything will be lower case only - except for the PARTY LEADERS whose ENTIRE NAMES will be ALWAYS spelled with UPPER CASE.
FYI, whenever you change your name or your avatar, all your posts on the Cube get automatically updated with those changes. And, just so you don't forget, the Cube collective is right behind you. The community is watching. Closely. Very closely.
12/31/2008, 1:18 am
Colonel 7.62
Praise the glorious leadership and foresight of our leader Red Square. Truly there is nothing he cannot do!
12/31/2008, 2:35 am
Premier Betty
The Skinnee Jay wrote:
I don't get it. Is Bush still evil?
Need you ask such a question?
12/31/2008, 2:11 pm
Marshal Pupovich
Red Square wrote:After the revolution, of course, all non-standard characters shall be eliminated and spaces replaced by underscores. Everything will be lower case only - except for the PARTY LEADERS whose ENTIRE NAMES will be ALWAYS spelled with UPPER CASE.
in awe MARSHAL_PUPOVICH stands
for RED_SQUARE his liege
warm tickle runs down leg
lower case proles
less equal equals
see your place
12/31/2008, 3:46 pm
The Skinnee Jay
Isn't it CAPITAL letter? Capital=Capitalism. Capitalism=Evil. So Capital letters evil? Can any Comrade(tm) shed some light?
12/31/2008, 4:46 pm
Red Square
Pupovich -
Red Square looks kindly on your haiku endeavors. Make sure you collect a sample of that warm tickle to be placed in the future Museum of the Revolution aka the Obama Memorial Library.
Skinnee Jay -
Capitalization only exists in written languages developed and used by White Europeans and their descendants in colonies around the world (aka The Western Civilization). Since the Western Civilization is as evil and unsustainable as the White Man himself, all their trademark inventions are also evil and unsustainable. Hence the elimination of capitalization in all progressive writing of late, especially on the Internet.
Whenever you think someone is too lazy or uneducated to use capital letters, think again! That is, in fact, a protest against the oppressive language rules imposed by the Western capitalist hegemonists on the masses in order to diminish the self-esteem of the unwashed, which makes it easier to subjugate them.
Part of our revolutionary strategy has been to raise the confidence and self-esteem of the unwashed - and we are succeeding! Today the average unwashed feels 60% more confident than the unwashed of the Eisenhower administration, and 100% more confident than those of the Jefferson administration. In fact, today's unwashed feel as if they had just come out of the shower every minute of the day - without even having to use soap or other personal hygiene products for months! Just ask Michael Rudolph, who is a borderline genius, about his borderline use of soap and a comb.
12/31/2008, 5:25 pm
Komrade Karin
New York sucks donkys
Blind man wants taxes up ass
North can't afford South
Times Square New Year Eve
Drinking smoking forbidden
Like going on Haj
The masses will freeze
But I will be buzzed and warm
Would rather have fun
12/31/2008, 11:33 pm
Marshal Pupovich
Thank you COMRADE_RED_SQUARE!
Permit me if you will if I share a bit of wisdom I just posted in another thread that I believe relates to the subject of capitalism and progressive thinking:
....Actually, I am shocked that people would be upset about Blogovich. When you think about it, even a progressive government such as we are establishing is in a sense the epitome of capitalism. "How can you say that Marshal?" one may ask. Simple comrades. The State offers services and tangibles to the people. In return, we take OPM for these goods and services. Now what sort of business would not charge a percentage of profit for those goods and services? None of course. What system of government would claim they do not make a profit on these goods and services? Why, Communist™ of course! And WE, the Party here in the USSA are not Communist™ are we comrades? (Everyone nod "no way!") No! Of course not! We are progressive socialists! So we are allowed to take a little off the top so to speak, for our delivery of goods and services. So what if Blogovich chose to do this without advertising his dealings? Why nothing of course! If he weren't so clumsy abot it, we could say "He's our guy!"
As you can see, in the end, we take these "nominal profits" so that we can do more For the Common Good™! In the end, it's all For the Children™! You feel it in the end don't you comrade?
1/1/2009, 4:03 am
DDR Kamerad
All hail Caroline?
Plutocracy has no place
In the collective
I thought Kennedys
Were all red; this appointment
smacks of Czarism
Israel attacks,
the press rages, but ignores
the Katyushas
better a lower-
case prole than an upper-case
capitalist, no?
The congolese teach
How blue helmets disable
your trigger finger
1/1/2009, 6:48 am
Innostranyi Otdel
10,000 Students
vying for their martyrdom.
Nuclear help from Us?
Blagojevich picks.
Many now ask of themselves:
What is he thinking?
Iran snubs Saudis
and burns Egypt's Embassy.
Ostracized. Alone.
"Free Ride" tickets bought.
We'll be taken for a "Ride",
but it won't be free.
Happy New Year All!
I do hope for better things,
God has promised me...
That's the um... you know...REAL God being refered to there.
Yes, yes, I know. Sasha the Gulag Dancing Bear will flaggelate me for every cursed syllable of filth I just posted...
1/1/2009, 6:56 pm
Marshal Pupovich
Innostranyi Otdel wrote:
Happy New Year All!
I do hope for better things,
God has promised me...
That's the um... you know...REAL God being refered to there.
Yes, yes, I know. Sasha the Gulag Dancing Bear will flaggelate me for every cursed syllable of filth I just posted...
Not necessarily Comrade, provided you know the name this god goes by, "The State" or "The Party." It is the State that has promised us all better things, who will command the ocean levels to drop, and from whom all hope for change will come.
AbecedariusRex wrote:blinding white blizzard, hokkus, kigo, & rikkus.
haru no umi.
One can never have enough Rikkus.
1/4/2009, 2:02 am
Innostranyi Otdel
Ah, Rikku's beauty
pierces into my essence
with her spiraled eyes...
I thank the monarchistic AbecedariusRex for his wonderful introduction to the subtleties of hokku.
Comrade Tovarich, my thanks to you as well for your unnecessary (but wholly gratifying) praise.
I noted with no small pleasure this passage:
In "flower power"
Lurks a social allergen
Cure: Agent Orange.
I am man enough to admit:
I giggled.
1/4/2009, 6:22 pm
Marshal Pupovich
America united
Living socialist conglomerate
Back to Heaven's Gate
1/4/2009, 11:33 pm
Comrade_Tovarich
Innostranyi Otdel wrote:I am man enough to admit:
I giggled.
Comrade Innostranyi Otdel,
Ah, it is very good to hear! For when they come for you, there is evidence that your reactionary backsliding could not be helped due to pre-existing conditions, including being human. As you know, socialism is no laughing matter!
Comrade Marshal Pupovich,
There is in Japan a line of men's clothing called Pearly Gates. It is targeted at men middle-aged and older, especially golfers. There are plenty of Japanese Christians, but I think the English meaning is lost on them. I would love to know how and why the clothing line's name was chosen.
1/4/2009, 11:46 pm
Comrade_Tovarich
I saw Logan's Run Soylent Green, Ray's 451
Future deja vu
Recycling we need
All cultures are equal, so:
Cannibalism
1/5/2009, 2:53 am
Kelly Ivanovna/келя ивановна
Sucking sound nearby
Is Bill of Rights abort
Better buy guns now
A whisper on wind:
Change and Hope are now at hand
Who wants freedom, bro?
Bushitler no more!
The masses show their love now
Fork it over, bud.
Worker's paradise
In McCarthy's own country
Except: no work here.
Reeducation:
I look forward to my camp
Will we have some s'mores?
Now election's done
Media can do their job:
Trailing Brittany.
Obama! Obam-
a!Obama!Obama!
Obama!Oh! Oh!
I am so confused:
Bush did not stop Barry.
Suspicious dealings.
Now the rich will pay
But they will still be happy
Obama loves all
It is about time
The government helped me thrive.
No more work or stress
January comes:
The world salutes new leader.
Skrew Amerikka.
Now we will have health,
Happiness and some wealth,
We take it from rich.
No more need to work
The government is able
To take care of you.
1/5/2009, 9:19 am
Comrade_Tovarich
The Tsarevna wrote:Reeducation:
I look forward to my camp
Will we have some s'mores?
Comradette Tsarevna,
Superb! Yet I do have a question: Does "s'mores" mean more liquidations?
1/5/2009, 10:40 pm
Kelly Ivanovna/келя ивановна
Comrade_Tovarich wrote:
The Tsarevna wrote:Reeducation:
I look forward to my camp
Will we have some s'mores?
Comradette Tsarevna,
Superb! Yet I do have a question: Does "s'mores" mean more liquidations?
Yes! liquidation of my Hershey bar between roasted marshmallows and a graham cracker.
1/5/2009, 11:56 pm
Marshal Pupovich
Comrade_Tovarich wrote:
There is in Japan a line of men's clothing called Pearly Gates. It is targeted at men middle-aged and older, especially golfers. There are plenty of Japanese Christians, but I think the English meaning is lost on them. I would love to know how and why the clothing line's name was chosen.
Comrade_Tovarich wrote:
There is in Japan a line of men's clothing called Pearly Gates. It is targeted at men middle-aged and older, especially golfers. There are plenty of Japanese Christians, but I think the English meaning is lost on them. I would love to know how and why the clothing line's name was chosen.
And glorious film "Heaven's Gate" told of utopian American communism! Where religion would be opiate of masses.
I confess I contributed to its awful failure as a capitalistic venture by never seeing it, however.
I did see a film once called "The Kingdom of Heaven's Gate Can Wait Until Dark", in which the evil Christians tried to defeat the freedom fighters of the Crusades but were distracted by the ghost of Mohammed who returned to establish jihad in the US west by planting a doll with explosives on Audrey Hepburn, but she outwitted them and became the leader of a commune where everyone had nice jewelry. But it wasn't that interesting.
Ah, I recall them. It was like Dancing with the Stars, forever.
Comradette Tsarevna,
Audrey is quite popular in Japan, but explosives belts are a bit lacking in the vital cute department to attain commercial success here. Maybe that's why I've not seen that film on NHK.
1/6/2009, 7:52 pm
DDR Kamerad
The Tsarevna wrote:Sucking sound nearby
Is Bill of Rights abort
Better buy guns now
No!no!no! we want
Unrestrained Control of the
Masses; guns taboo
I am so confused:
Bush did not stop Barry.
Suspicious dealings.
Miami Herald's
Dave Barry retired while
Bush was President
